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Right in front of my Ted Cruz? Today in Tweets

Ted Cruz likes to watch

By David Futrelle

Welcome to a special early edition of Today in Tweets, because, OMG, Ted Cruz “liked” a porn video on Twitter. And not just any porn video: an incest porn video in which a “mom” walks in on her “daughter” having sex, and kind of likes it.

Oh, the irony! As the Solicitor General in Texas, you may recall, Cruz defended a ban on dildos. with his legal team memorably arguing that “[t]here is no substantive-due-process right to stimulate one’s genitals for non-medical purposes unrelated to procreation or outside of an interpersonal relationship.” Which seems a bit harsh.

Apparently he, or whoever was manning his Twitter account at the time, doesn’t actually agree with this proposition any more.

Let’s go to the tweets:

https://twitter.com/andreagrimes/status/907483719476297728

(Not a real tweet, BTW; Trump would never praise Cruz like that.)

Ted’s college roommate added his two cents:

https://twitter.com/clmazin/status/907470879851819008

And this wasn’t even the first time he weighed in on Mr. Cruz’ alleged nocturnal activities.

https://twitter.com/clmazin/status/720259227067920385

There is, of course, news that doesn’t involve Ted Cruz’ penis. Unfortunately, much of it involved the penises of other creepy dudes.

https://twitter.com/zachheltzel/status/907347649568714752

Some actual serious news:

Some cute animals:

https://twitter.com/PAYOLETTER/status/907439945249206272

H/T — Makroth, for posting a link to the Piano Man update tweet in the comments

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Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
3 years ago

(Not a real tweet, BTW; Trump would never praise Cruz like that.)

Which is unfortunate, because they have so much in common!

Namely incest.

Citizen Rat
Citizen Rat
3 years ago

Another sanctimonious Republican shows off what a glaring hypocrite they are. Must be a day ending with “Y”.

I think Ted Cruz is a vile and reprehensible human being. Though I don’t believe in kinkshaming, I will laugh at him for being stupid enough to “like” a porno via his Twitter, especially when he’s a religious fundamentalist tea party darling. This man needs to be ridiculed for every mistake and booed at for every horrible piece of legislation he supports.

banned@4chan.org
banned@4chan.org
3 years ago

“Luke, from Bath, said he was still playing that fucking piano around 4 in the goddamned morning.”

They buried the lede.

Joe Klemmer
Joe Klemmer
3 years ago

Hey! That’s Cory Chase in that vedio. She’s great. She’s just so much to watch.

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

James Woods is such a fucking toad.

Joe, thanks for the Cruz Boner update.

PaganReader - Misandrist Spinster

Apparently Milo Yiannopoulis is one of the people who lost their homes to Irma. I feel bad for all the other people who lost their homes.

Michael Brew
Michael Brew
3 years ago

Thaaaaaat’s my senator’s boner!

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

@ paganreader

Milo Yiannopoulis is one of the people who lost their homes to Irma.

Apparently he was lying, sorry, being satirical.

The Miami Herald investigated the photo used in Yiannopoulos’ post and reports it isn’t in the Brickell neighbourhood, as claimed in the post, but rather Edgewater – and is owned by Gerard Duhart, rather than Yiannopoulos.
It’s not clear if the post was yet another ‘joke’ by Yiannopoulos about Hurricane Irma

Jamesworkshop
Jamesworkshop
3 years ago

https://twitter.com/waypoint/status/907657866177376256

‘Destiny 2’ included a gauntlet with a white supremacist logo: http://bit.ly/2gZvw3q

happy national video games day.

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

It wouldn’t surprise me if James Woods was also one of the (unfortunately many) people in Hollywood who steadfastly defend child rapist Roman Polanski.

What would be the point of Milo joking about losing a house to Irma? I just don’t get reactionary humor at all. It’s either cruel, nonsensical or most often both. Or was he trying to con his fans out of money and called it a joke when he got caught? It’s hard to tell with these guys. I’m reminded of the time that Roosh claimed to be in a Polish jail and later said it was a joke.

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

Ted: “I feel like rubbing one out.”

*Opens Twitter*

He cracks me up.

PaganReader - Misandrist Spinster

Apparently he was lying

Aw poop. I’m not surprised, though. In that case, I feel sorry for everyone who lost their homes.

Pie
Pie
3 years ago

@weirwoodtreehugger

What would be the point of Milo joking about losing a house to Irma?

Because people having been talking about him lately.

Gussie Jives
Gussie Jives
3 years ago

Hmm… wonder if Ted Cruz is a closet furry….

Now I must bleach my brain.

NicolaLuna
NicolaLuna
3 years ago

Ted: “I feel like rubbing one out.”

*Opens Twitter*

He cracks me up.

I laughed at this for a full minute. My 8 year old asked me why I was laughing. I couldn’t think of something to tell him so I just said “I don’t know”

He’s looking at me with a baffled expression now haha.

Iseult The Idle
Iseult The Idle
3 years ago

Yeah, that was just Milo being so edgy, “haha, people lost everything, wheee! I don’t care because I’m a jackass. An EDGY jackass. Does my hair look okay?”

The fat cat is indeed doing an amazing job.

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
3 years ago

Apparently Cruz’s denial is suspiciously passive-voiced.

Never thought I’d say this, but I miss Kay Bailey H.

DannyBoy
DannyBoy
3 years ago

More like Indiana Bones and the Raiders of the Lost Bark

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

NicolaLuna, glad I could give you the giggle this whole dumb story gave me when I first read about it…

Gussie Jives
Gussie Jives
3 years ago

Hey! That’s Cory Chase in that vedio. She’s great. She’s just so much to watch.

In a moment of brainfart, I mixed her up with fellow performer Kayden Kross and she became Cory Cross.

comment image

I don’t know why I have Maple Leafs alumni of the 90s on my mind… must be the preseason or something.

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

EDIT: CN mental health/mention of suicidal thoughts

FAMILY CRISIS STUFF

Hey folks, lovely Mammotheers, everyone. I have a Very Bad Situation on my hands. This is mainly venting, but advice might also be useful I suppose.

I just got a phone call from my brother’s girlfriend. They are, completely out of the blue from my perspective, in the process of separating. Unbeknownst to me or anyone else this has been the situation for about a month already, but tonight it’s escalated. She has been cheating on him, and she’s now moved in with her niece temporarily. He is in free fall crisis mode, as far as I can tell. He had even gone over to the niece’s house to try and talk her into coming back home for the night, but she refused.

Bit of background: they are both in their late 30s and have been living together for something like 17 years. My brother has a history of undiagnosed mental illness. He has never had a job or an income, and is financially entirely dependent on his girlfriend. He also has no social circle other than the immediate family. The apartment belongs to the girlfriend, even though he’s the only one staying there at the moment.

He refuses to talk to me. I’ve tried calling and texting. We live in different cities, so I can’t go over to his place. I talked to my parents and they tried visiting him to check in, but he wouldn’t let them in and won’t talk to them either. I have NO idea whether he might be suicidal, but I definitely can’t rule it out. His girlfriend says he hasn’t been violent (and I wouldn’t expect him to be), but he’s been as verbally aggressive as you’d expect from someone who’s just been betrayed and dumped by their lifelong partner.

I know he has a psychologist/contact person in his town, and I will try to call her tomorrow morning and give her a heads up. He has an appointment for 11 tomorrow, so hopefully he will at least show up for that.

I am not sure what to do here. We’re devastated, and this is all very sudden. In the longer perspective, we need to figure out how to get him to cooperate with social services. I don’t think it’ll be possible for him to support himself anytime soon. In the short term, I’m just hoping my brother will still be alive tomorrow. I’ve already reported in sick for tomorrow, so I’ll just spend the day trying to manage things as far as I can. Ughh.

A. Noyd
A. Noyd
3 years ago
Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
3 years ago

@IP

I’m sorry to hear about your brother’s crisis. I don’t have any advice to give you, since you say he has no social circle other than his immediate family. (I at first thought about your contacting a mutual acquaintance from the same city.). I hope, for his own sake and your family’s sake, that he doesn’t self-harm.

Miss Edgy Nation
Miss Edgy Nation
3 years ago

@A. Noyd

Brock Turner isn’t just a textbook example of a rapist, he’s also a sex offender poster boy.

I saw an ad today for a sex offender search service with his mugshots on it. I probably shouldn’t have laughed, but I did.

TheKND
TheKND
3 years ago

@Jamesworkshop
Wait! The guys who made Halo, a game where the genetically engineered super-soldiers all have blue eyes and defend the remnants of humanity from a conglomerate of dozens of alien races might be a little on the non-progressive side?

Austin Loomis
3 years ago

The best thing about that image is the quality of the tea being spilled in the caption:

Some are shocked at how short this sentence is. Others who are more familiar with the way sexual violence has been handled in the criminal justice system are shocked that he was found guilty and served any time at all. What do you think?

Personally, I think that whoever wrote all that salt should’ve thrown at least a little of it over their shoulder just to be on the safe side.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
3 years ago

@Petal
That’s awful. Vent away, fam! *much and many hugs* As far as advice, get some sleep. Glad you were able to take the day, rest up to make the most of it <3

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

Damn IP, I have no advice for you (I got out of that business a long time ago, lolol), but I will send you and your brother healing thoughts and good wishes. (Hugz)

Dalillama: Irate Social Engineer

@IP
*llots of hugs*

Gijoel
Gijoel
3 years ago

I guess Nerdy Morty’s wish came true and incest porn got more mainstream appeal. That or Ted Cruz is the friend he wished for.

PaganReader - Misandrist Spinster

comment image
Kitty for Imaginary Petal

Ooglyboggles
3 years ago

@IP
*Hugs

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

Welp, Democrat Charlie St. Clair just won the seat left vacant by the resignation of Red Pill Reddit founder and misogynist extraordinaire Robert Fisher.

mrex
mrex
3 years ago

@IP

It’s the nuclear, last resort option, but if you’re REALLY, REALLY certain that he could commit suicide, and he won’t let anyone in or talk to anyone, then I would think about calling the police to do a welfare check. But there’s a chance that he simply needs some space to process what has happened. He may feel overwhelmed by all the well wishes and concern pouring out to him. It’s normal.

Also, you’re being kind if hard on the ex. Which is understandable, but it’s just going to burn up energy that you could bs using to support your brother.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

@IP
I’m very sorry to hear about your brother’s sad situation.

I suggest you call Suicide Prevention right now and ask for their advice. They know a lot more than I do.

Best wishes to you and your family.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

Ted Cruz “liked” a porn video on Twitter. And not just any porn video: an incest porn video in which a “mom” walks in on her “daughter” having sex, and kind of likes it.

Wut.

Thank Katie for puppies and kitties.

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

Mrex, there was no judgement of the girlfriend at all that I could glean from IP’s post. Where are you getting that?

Feline
Feline
3 years ago

IP:
I doubt I know anybody in his city who could help, but you should see if they have a Psyk-Akut thing where he lives, for the future. And try to get him to take psychiatric care seriously.
Best hopes, and all love.

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

Thanks for the support, everyone.

@mrex

At this point, I’m trying to give him space. I’m truly hoping that’s what he needs, but there’s no way of knowing for sure.

Like PeeVee, I’m confused by your statement that I’m being hard on his girlfriend. I think I described the situation in a matter-of-fact way. She’s one of my best friends as well.

mrex
mrex
3 years ago

@PV

I could go into detail, but I honestly don’t think it would be beneficial to pick apart his post. Part of it is what he didn’t say, rather than what he said. And I could always be wrong, or misread, as well. I can’t see into IP’s mind, and I am a dumbfuck when it comes to people.

Divorces are hard, but in my experience, they go best when you try to keep a level head, avoid thinking in ways likely to increase anger, and remember that there’s always two sides to every story. When I went through divorce (which I can’t say I’m fully through yet), that meant working towards forgiving my ex for all his mistakes, and working towards forgiving myself for all of mine. When I’m trying to support someone close to me during a divorce, that means trying to work out all my own feelings towards their ex, so that I can keep a clear head, and not hold them back from healing with my own feeling about the situation.

That’s just my opinion/experience. FWIW. 🙂

@IP

Ah, ninja’d. 🙂

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

@mrex

I’m focusing on my brother because he’s the one who’s alone and won’t talk to anyone. The girlfriend has other friends and family (which I mentioned in my post) and she is talking about the situation and reaching out to people (which I also mentioned in my post).

I don’t know why in the world you would think it’d be helpful to go full amateur psych on what I “didn’t say” in this situation. You’re right – you can’t see into my mind, so don’t even try it. Now you’ve just pissed me off, and for no damn reason. Sigh. Just forget I said anything in the first place.

mrex
mrex
3 years ago

@IP

I’m missing the edit so… thought you were saying that she betrayed him.

Edit: holy shit, I forgot to hit send and now I see you last post. Sorry, didn’t mean to play amateur psyc. I hope things work out.

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

@mrex

She cheated on him (also mentioned in the post). That’s normally seen as a betrayal on some level. I don’t think I’m being overly judgmental about it. It’s a fact that this happened.

mrex
mrex
3 years ago

@IP

Even if you were being “overly” judgemental about her cheating, (and I don’t think you are), I honestly think that would be normal and understandable in this situation. It’s not “wrong” to feel anger if you do, it just isn’t the best place to support your brother from if you can help it.

That’s all. Hope things turn around.

Dimmy
Dimmy
3 years ago

For what it’s worth, I also hope things work out, although I have no advice — and you seem to have the situation as “under control” as it can be. I guess it’s going to be rough for the next week or so.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 years ago

Jesus, mrex, is there any situation you can’t fuck up? IP comes here with a serious-business problem and your response is to criticize what they didn’t say?

Your issues with forgiving your ex are your issues and not IP’s. If you can’t say something unconditionally supportive or helpful, just don’t say anything. Christ on a stick. This ain’t that hard.

Jaygee
Jaygee
3 years ago

Hi Imaginary Petal. I’m sorry you’re going through some family strife. I don’t know if I can offer useful advice, but maybe I can offer some insight?

I read your story and it felt eerily like my own from last year. I was 30 and living with my boyfriend of 11 years who had mental health issues like depression (which included suicidal ideation) and social anxiety, and he was also pretty much financially dependent on me. Although he was the one that initiated the break up, in a “I’m leaving and going to gamble away money I don’t have and then kill myself.” So in my case, I texted his parents to tell them of the situation. There wasn’t much I could do directly because we were in the car going to some place before he planned to leave and carry out his self-destruction. When we got to our destination, his parents had called the police to prevent him from harming himself. He was admitted to a psych ward on a 5150. (This was his fourth 5150; the first in 2009.) He and I talked while he was in the ward, and it was heart-breaking that I had to break up with him a second time because he seemed to think we weren’t broken up. (This was an ongoing problem in our relationship: I couldn’t tell when it was him or the depression talking.) But separating was something we had been talking about for a while actually.

Of what he’s told me about his experience being in the wards, it’s good to be able to kind of have a change of environment. It seemed like it meant that he wouldn’t fall into negative habits. There was also a set routine. Being limited on what he could do had both pros and cons: he didn’t have to think about what he had to do much, but when there was something he wanted to do that he couldn’t, it was annoying. The other thing was that interacting with other people who were suffering kind of put his problems into perspective (for a time), but since he’s kind of empathetic, he instead wanted to focus on help others.

Maybe your brother could check himself in somewhere? I don’t know where you and your family live or what health insurance is like where you are. If you do think that he could be a danger to himself, you might have to involve police or something though.

It sucks that you have to go through this. It doesn’t seem like something that will resolve soon, so I wish you and your brother well trying to figure things out. You and your family might have to figure out something to do about his living situation, in addition to the immediate turmoil of the break up. My ex-bf ended up moving back in with his parents, and he’s still there now.

Anyway, good luck.

Amnesia
Amnesia
3 years ago

@IP
*hugs if you want them*

@mrex
They (being IP, brother, and any other concerned parties personally involved) can take their time on the matter of forgiving the ex after they’ve established that the brother is safe. They could even hold off on that until after he’s found some semblance of a stable living situation that doesn’t rely on the ex. Or longer. So long as they’re not violating the ex’s rights, their forgiveness timetable doesn’t seem like it should be any of our business, especially when that wasn’t the kind of advice IP was asking for.

Wicked Witch Of Whatever
Wicked Witch Of Whatever
3 years ago

@imaginary petal
From memory I think you are in the US? You probably have this information already, but here are some phone numbers for people who can talk to you ( or your brother if he is ready) about mental health emergency treatment or suicide. I hope there are good resources there – I have no experience with the US but I have had to contact emergency mental health teams for clients while in the UK and although resources varied enormously from county to county I never regretted it. I’d be wary about calling the police – even in the UK that can be dangerous for the person in crisis and from all I’ve heard it’s worse in the US.

mrex
mrex
3 years ago

Nthing the warning that the police are a last resort only.

@POM

“Your issues with forgiving your ex are your issues and not IP’s.”

No shit they’re my issues. But, I’ve been in a situation similiar to the brother’s, so I’m giving advice on what has helped me in that situation (having a calm, rational, person who was close enough to me that they could give relevant advice in a fair manner), and things that made my life worse (dealing with other people’s anxiety and anger over the situation on top of my own). If marriage is a family affair, so is divorce to a degree. It’s not criticism. It’s advice. For whatever it’s worth.

Although I *really* need to stop trying to assume what other people are thinking.

@Amnesia

If assumptions that people have to get through a breakup before working to forgive worked, we wouldn’t have such a dim view of how sucessful a divorce can be. If closely entangling lives is a collaberation, then disentangling those lives is a collaberation. Again, that’s not a criticism, it’s advice, FWIW.