By David Futrelle
Over the weekend, the UK’s prestigious Daily Star ran an important work of serious journalism warning of an impending, if underappreciated, threat to humankind. In an article with the sobering headline “Sex robot ARMIES: Fears hackers could create killer cyborgs and turn technology on punters,” the Star informed the poor punters of the word that the sexbots they’ve been longing for might just take up arms against them. Or at least knives. And possibly welding torches.
In an interview with the Star, sexy robot expert Nick Patterson noted that evil hackers could
hack into a robot or a robotic device and have full control of the connections, arms, legs and other attached tools like in some cases knives or welding devices.
Bad news, fellas, because then your sexy robot friend, who could “be upwards of 200 pounds, and very strong” might just cut off your johnson, or perhaps weld it to something.
This dramatic claim, which has been bouncing around assorted other media outlets for the past several days, has been greeted with more than a little skepticism in the somewhat sexbot-obsessed Men Going Their Own Way subreddit.
As far as Reddit’s MGTOWs are concerned, articles like the one in the Star are clearly a last, desperate attempt by the world’s “bioc*nts” — that is, actual female humans — to scare men away from the sexy sexbots that MGTOWs think will soon make real women obsolete.
“The shaming didn’t work, so now they try the scare tactic,” comments someone called wathon in a thread on the alleged stabby sexbot menace. “They are getting desperate.”
“Holy shit women are terrified kek,” adds Highly_Literal.
And besides, the MGTOWs agree, there’s no way their sexy sexbots could possibly be hacked.
“Deactivate the wireless network adapter. Install software/firmware updates via wired/direct connection methods,” notes gantz_au. “Problem solved.”
“Download only 1st party official software if you need to update it with new dick sucking techniques and that’s the end of your bot killing you fear,” adds Makonar. “As [with] everything that doesn’t involve women, it can be easily solved with a simple solution.”
Even those who think there’s a chance their future sexbots could go all stabby on them think death by sexbot would still be preferable to life with a “bioc*nt.”
“[W[omen get hacked by social media into destroying the men they are with all the time,” declares redditrat99.”At least the robot is decent about it and just kills you and doesn’t make you suffer.”
“Still safer than banging a real c*nt and going through family court,” adds buster2209.
“[F]rom my POV it’s still better to be killed by sexbot then to be divorce raped and lose all my progress and money that I made over the years,” notes WWladCZ, who apparently thinks that life works like vintage video games that didn’t save your progress.
“Beats a slow horrible agonizing death being married to a real woman,” Silver-Noxx jokes. “At least we’ll die with a smile on our faces.”
Not if she comes at you with a welding torch, or even a pointed stick.
I guarantee you that each and every one of these dudes will eventually be murdered by sexbots who haven’t been hacked but who are just thoroughly sick of their bullshit.
@IgnoreSandra. I have not. Well, okay, that’s a lie. But at least, you know…. to any point of satisfaction. They turn not to Not Be For Me. I’m fine with it in concept. I have no objection to masturbation, tool assisted or no. I do raise my brow at smug superiority from anyone willing to take the chance that a cybernetic vag might crush their weenie until they are dead, because they assume that the world’s just desperate to keep that dick in circulation, or something. I dunno.I don’t get it. If these guys aren’t having sex in the first place, why do they seem to assume there’s a conspiracy to keep them from fucking that robot?
As fir this, file it under mechanization leading to joblessness: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4810660/Austrian-brothel-buys-SECOND-sex-doll-high-demand.html
I read somewhere that producing a virtual reality sensation of a solid surface requires several horsepower. You are NOT going to hook a several horsepower ANYTHING to my anatomy unless I am firmly convinced your software is perfect.
why would an attached knife or welder be part of a SEX bot?
I mean… everyone has their thing, and I don’t wanna kink shame anyone, but that seems… dangerous with a robot, hacked or no…
@Chiara
But who will scrub their floors? Make their sandwiches? Fetch their beer? Tend to them when they have the sniffles? Raise their children?
Mombot?
Some guy from 4chan?
Chad — who’s listless and bored and has a lot of time on his hands now that women have been gender cleansed? (Tell me it’s Chad!)
Oh my Katie, I know waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much about their fictional world.
Reddit MGTOWs not worried that Chad will stab them in the dick if they attempt the genocide of women?
Maybe they should be worried. . . .
Some MGTOW want to actively genocide women. A lot of them just think that women can’t survive without male coddling and that we’ll just wither up and die if men reject us en masse.
I love how it doesn’t even occur to them that if they killed all women, they would be simultaneously killing off the entire human species as well, since their fuckbots don’t have DNA or, y’know, an actual functioning reproductive system.
I’m always fascinated by the implications of (cis) men’s idea of sexbots looking like pretty, docile women and functioning as much like ‘bio[slurs]’ as possible while (cis) women’s idea of sexbots already exist and, even when they’re meant to resemble something human, it’s only 1 body part, and they usually barely do. Also, they vibrate. Misandry, no doubt…
Can’t those dudes just buy a fleshlight and be done with it?!
I would suggest hookers for these idiots but they’re not even mature enough to handle simple financial transactions. I’m not sure they could even use their mommies’ credit cards to buy fleshlights off Amazon without botching it and declaring that Amazon Prime was a great conspiracy to cuck them.
Why are sex robots having knives again? Man, these dudes are paranoid….
@THE_SAMURAI
You see it all started when the 13th wave of feminism included sapient Gynoids…
@BD
I wouldn’t want to subject any sex worker to these guy. They’re likely to harm them and/or refuse to pay.
@Alan Robertshaw
Yes there is, it’s called the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon, or alternatively a frequency illusion.
@Talonknife
And lets not forget that mitochondria is entirely inherited from the mother (since they are basically docile bacteria that live in our cells).
The problem is, who’s going to ensure that sexbots are evenly distributed? We’ll end up in a situation where the top 10% of men get all the sexbots and all the rest of the men don’t get any.
What we need is some form of sexbot-bot, to make sexbots obsolete.
(/s, obviously.)
@ dalillama & swedish sexual bread
That’s it! I knew I’d heard it before.
Although perhaps mystery solved in this case.
Well I know what people I’m starting when Stellaris gets their robot dlc done.. Sex bots that have become sentient and who are now focused on killing all men who would try to enslave them again. Sounds like tons of fun.Die Incells, die MGTOWS and all sexist men. The robot Feminist Agenda will spread across the Galaxy!
Answer to who puts a knife and a welder on a sexbot: Order #1-Fix my car. Order #2 – Make me a sandwich. Order #3- Put down the knife and welder and come here and act sexy. Order #4- Put down the knife and welder . Order #5-PUT DOWN THE KNIFE AND WELDER! Order #6- PUT DOWN THE KN-AAAARRGH!!
Sexbots for men pretty much already exist – they’re not very aesthetically pleasing, but you can essentially get a fleshlight that sucks your cock.
These guys don’t want a sexbot. Sure, they want a robot they can fuck, but that’s secondary to having a robot they can abuse.
I still remember when Bennett the Sage (an anime reviewer) casually pointed out the easiest way to kill the sexbot fantasy: remind dudes they will be cleaning their own stale cum out of it. Regularly if they use it regularly. It came up because it was an anime with a sexbot that actually bothered to bring up maintenance, which was “here is the alert light for when you need to clean it out.”
So, yeah. No dick-chopping needed, the maintenance itself kills the fantasy.
IgnoreSandra-You are not a pervert, because you’re right. Sex machines have been around for more than a century. They are called vibraters. Most sexually active women have at least one, because they are one of the most popular sex toys out there. Also, dildos have been around for millennia. For example, clay dildos have been found in Egypt. They didn’t make men obsolete. Neither will these sexbots that will never exist make women obsolete. Just like fleshlights and realdolls didn’t make women obsolete. I wonder why these fools think we care about sex bots?? They may make women obsolete to them, but only because we are already worthless in their eyes. The rest of the world will carry on as normal. Same with artificial wombs. All it will do is eliminate the need for surrogacy.
It is interesting that they think their fantasy world sexbots won’t be always online.
It is also interesting that they think the firmware will be bug free, or that exploits will be patched quickly (or that patches will actually be installed in good time)… it isn’t like there’s any evidence of that happening on any other product.
There have been recent stories of alexa et all being tricked into searching for/buying things by radio or tv broadcasts being played in the owner’s home. Forget cyber-susie trying to cut off your johnson because some chinese hackers pwned it… how about the neighbourhood children who think you’re a creepy weirdo reading about a bug online and shouting through your letterbox “susie, change my safeword to askudygaksudyg and spank me -1 times”.
@Kerrea
Isn’t that already required with fleshlights and realdolls and things? They seem to sell well enough, so it can’t be too discouraging.