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MRAs respond to campus rape policy reversal with tepid applause, jokes about Betsy DeVos’ vagina

MRAs: Bored now

By David Futrelle

I have to say,  I expected a bit more from our nation’s Men’s Rights Activists. Yesterday, arkoudaphobic education secretary Betsy DeVos handed MRAs a huge gift, announcing that she would be putting an end to Obama-era policies on campus rape that MRAs and conservatives have been pitching fits about for the past six years.

But the reaction from MRAs has been surprisingly muted so far. On on the Men’s Rights subreddit — the biggest MRA forum there is — the regulars are much more interested in talking about a woman who accused someone of “mansplaining” on Twitter than they are in talking about DeVos’ decision. The topic devoted to the former non-issue has garnered 9640 upvotes and more than 900 comments; the top post on DeVos’ gutting of the Obama administration’s campus rape policy, by contrast, has earned only 153 upvotes and one-sixteenth the number of comments.

And while most of those commenting are happy with DeVos’ move, they aren’t exactly dancing in the streets.

“Welp at least we achieved something with Donald Trumps victory,” writes someone called keonkla.

This is why I voted for trump mainly, He was are best bet in seeing some Lessening of the Gynocentric War on men and masculinity. Looks like its paying off to.

As 5th_Law_of_Robotics sees it, meanwhile, this is “[p]erhaps the only good thing to come from this adminstration.”

In one of the handful of other threads on the subject, a fellow calling himself ISOanexplanation is a bit more spirited in his response:

White-knight gynocentrism has always facilitated the weaponization of women’s unhappiness but feminism has now anonymized it on campus and expanded the definition of sexual assault to such a ridiculous degree that a man’s unwanted word or glance is tantamount to rape. If feminists wanted rape to be taken more seriously their first mistake was calling everything rape. I just wish DeVos’ deputy hadn’t apologized for her statement about most college “rape” being awkward drunk sex.

The most enthusiastic response I found came in yet another thread on the subject, from a fellow who claims the new policy had convinced him that it was safe for him to stay in the United States. Bowaustin begins his comment by complaining that

in the modern age facts don’t matter if your male your a second class citizen and are assumed guilty until proven innocent if the accuser is female.

But DeVos’ announcement has given him new hope.

I had honestly given up hope that this would do anything but get worse and was planning to just move to a country with fairer laws in this regard as soon as I finish college, but now maybe I won’t, if it keeps getting better and we start seeing actual fair and equal treatment being pushed for I may actually stay.

One thing is certain though I will never agree with the feminists and I will never do anything but oppose them at this point they are power drunk border line fascists pushing more and more for special treatment and it is high time that they stop being handled with kiddie gloves. I say this because I am tired of having to live in fear of being persecuted for something I didn’t do because some bitch accused me for personal gain.

Apparently accusing random innocent college dudes of rape is a path to instant riches. Who knew?

Over in the MRA-adjacent Men Going Their Own Way subreddit, meanwhile, the regulars are even less enthusiastic than their MRA brethern.

While one commenter hails DeVos’ move as the “[f]irst tangible rollback of weaponized feminism we’ve seen in nearly 2 decades,” others aren’t so sure. Indeed, one commenter thinks Devos’ move is part of a “gynocentric” plot against men, intended to keep them docile slaves of women. He apparently also thinks DeVos has a stinky vagina.

“That smelly smell,” sneers rtmlex.

Gynocentrism is as strong as ever, this is a siren’s song to get you back to the plantation. “Look, men, we’re doing things for you. Now work.”

So why aren’t MRA’s more enthusiastic in their response? Probably because the overwhelming majority of so-called Men’s Rights Activists aren’t actually activists at all. They’re just guys who like to complain about women endlessly online. So naturally they’re much more interested in kvetching about a random woman on Twitter than they are in talking about government policy — even when they’re handed a policy victory on a silver platter.

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Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 years ago

So naturally they’re much more interested in kvetching about a random woman on Twitter than they are in talking about government policy — even when they’re handed a policy victory on a silver platter.

Think Betsy DeVos’s gender has anything to do with that?

Heirloom Roses
Heirloom Roses
3 years ago

weaponization of women’s unhappiness

Can unhappiness be weaponized? How much unhappiness is needed to construct a viable weapon?

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

One thing is certain though I will never agree with the feminists and I will never do anything but oppose them at this point they are power drunk border line fascists pushing more and more for special treatment and it is high time that they stop being handled with kiddie gloves.

“Kiddie gloves,” Mr. Run-On Sentences?

Do you think that college administrators put on very small gloves when they deal with women who say they’ve been raped?

Heirloom Roses
Heirloom Roses
3 years ago

@ Policy of Madness

LOL.

Unlucky Blackjack
Unlucky Blackjack
3 years ago

Another example in the Trump Administration’s Official motto:

“Regardless if its popular, good, or even if we don’t even have an a plan to replace it, if Obama did it, we’re not! #MAGA”

Wait a minute, I get the pattern now:

1. Bad thing happens and everyone forgets about the last bad thing
2. Trump says and/or does something horrible and/or stupid
3. Trump backpedals
4. Trump backpedals on his backpedals, reveling he was forced to apologize and his original reaction is his real thoughts
5. Arguing ensues, but nothing actually changes
6. Goto step 1

We’re on step 1 right now, so I eagerly await Trump’s tweet:

“Men never rape. Alot of people say that rape is fake and Lib women lie and the mainstream media lies! SAD!”

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

If feminists wanted rape to be taken more seriously their first mistake was calling everything rape.

Good thing that we’re not actually doing that.

MRAs however, do that when they call paying child support or alimony “divorce rape” or compare buying a woman a drink and not getting laid for it to rape.

From the comments highlighted, it would seem that MRAs are currently dropping the pretense that they care about male victims?

cat
cat
3 years ago

“at this point they are power drunk border line fascists”

if he’s actually concerned about these “border line fascists” i have some bad news for him about the actual LITERAL fascists who are running around in public these days… but no okay keep whining about women on reddit, bro.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

OT — but way to go, unbreakable little girl!

Bail doubled for man charged with throwing girl from bridge

WESTBOROUGH, Mass. (AP) — A judge has doubled bail for a Massachusetts man accused of kidnapping his friend’s 7-year-old daughter and throwing her off a bridge into a lake.

An additional $1 million bail was set for Joshua Hubert at his arraignment Tuesday on an attempted murder charge in Westborough District Court. The case was continued to Oct. 25.

Authorities say Hubert took the girl from her grandparents’ Worcester home at about 2:30 a.m. on Aug. 27, choked her and threw her off the Interstate 290 overpass into Lake Quinsigamond (kwin-SIG’-uh-mund).

She swam about 100 yards (91 meters) to shore and knocked on the door of a waterfront home in Shrewsbury at 4 a.m. She had minor injuries.

http://www.sfgate.com/news/crime/article/Bail-set-for-man-charged-with-throwing-girl-from-12174010.php#photo-14050675

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

OT: More on the unbreakable little girl — from the woman whose door she knocked on

Afraid but calm, a 7-year-old girl figured out how to survive the unthinkable

https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/08/30/afraid-but-calm-little-girl-figured-out-how-survive-unthinkable/bNtPmpbE3q0IJcmOLesAYP/story.html?p1=Article_Related_Box_Article

Leo
Leo
3 years ago

@weirwoodtreehugger
Ach, yeah. The number of times I’ve seen them declare that [X] isn’t sexual assault and only feminists say it is, and that isn’t that ridiculous of feminists, as though they almost expect agreement, when [X] is in fact something that clearly fits the legal definition of sexual assault. It’s horrifying. It’s hard to tell sometimes if they really don’t know it’s assault or are just pretending not to, in order to get away with it easier. Or maybe they think everyone does it, because they do, and therefore it ‘doesn’t count’ in their minds. I suppose either way, it doesn’t make much difference what their thinking is, they get away with it by trying to create doubt, which DeVos just added to, because this will be taken as though campus sexual assault wasn’t really a major issue.

Ray of Rays
Ray of Rays
3 years ago

@ Heirloom Roses

Can unhappiness be weaponized? How much unhappiness is needed to construct a viable weapon?

If I remember Ranma 1/2 correctly, the answers are “yes” and “depends.”

…currently debating whether living in a world where being oppressed could unlock ki blasts would be the best or worst thing ever.

tedthefed
tedthefed
3 years ago

I was having a discussion about this kind of thing recently with a philosophy professor. The thing he seemed bent out of shape about was how unrealistic it was to expect people to make sure their partners were drunk before having sex. When I told him that I MYSELF have stopped with someone when it was getting heavy and I started suspecting she was drunk, he almost seemed mad. “Oh, well ok, you’re PERFECT, but not everyone is.”

I don’t want to cast him as a bad guy… he does a lot of work to explicitly help women (especially WoC) in his field, and it was a private context where devil’s advocating wasn’t super inappropriate. But it still shocked me that people can see this very basic standard as somehow out of line.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 years ago

It’s hard to tell sometimes if they really don’t know it’s assault or are just pretending not to, in order to get away with it easier.

These are people who can easily see themselves doing the same thing, and perhaps they already have done the same thing. They believe themselves to be good people, and rapists are bad people, QED that thing they did/thought about doing that one time isn’t rape.

They’re not safe people.

brian
brian
3 years ago

I want to know more about these “kiddie gloves.”
I assume that, like kid gloves are made of kid leather, kiddie gloves are made from… the leather from children?

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

@tedthefed
Wait wait wait. He thinks it’s difficult to tell whether someone is drunk? Someone he’s in the process of getting physical with? I’m typically pretty oblivious to what’s going on with other people but I’ve never had an issue telling if someone else is drunk.

Edit: oh, wait, he doesn’t think it’s difficult to tell if the other person is drunk, he thinks it’s unfair to expect anyone not to take advantage of that. Is that it?

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
3 years ago

This is why I voted for trump mainly, He was are best bet in seeing some Lessening of the Gynocentric War on men and masculinity. Looks like its paying off to

This poor soul and his economic anxiety…

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

TW/OT/OMG

Florida Republican refuses to resign after gruesomely violent past uncovered
Broward County GOP board member was once charged with attempted murder for splitting a female classmate’s head open

http://www.salon.com/2017/09/08/florida-republican-refuses-to-resign-after-gruesomely-violent-past-uncovered/

Of course he’s a Trumpublican. Of course.

tedthefed
tedthefed
3 years ago

@kupo I couldn’t really tell. I think he thought both? I think it was, it takes a degree of self-control to put an eye to whether someone is drunk in the heat of the moment. He wasn’t saying that controlling yourself to stop was beyond the pale, I think?

The main thing for me was how he was so nonplussed and irritated that I thought it wasn’t hard.

Leo
Leo
3 years ago

@tedthefred
I don’t think someone who thinks the self-control needed to stop is a difficult thing ought to be having sex at all. This is hypothetically before it’s even begun, as well, what if a partner says ‘stop’ during sex? Definitely someone I wouldn’t regard as safe/trustworthy, not if he suggested you were ‘perfect’ for wanting to avoid raping someone. I wouldn’t be that inclined to think his work with WoC places him above suspicion, either, would not be the first time an ally turned out to be an abuser.

tedthefed
tedthefed
3 years ago

@Leo I can’t prove he’s not an abuser, but there’s no evidence for it. I mean, without getting into defending a point of view I strongly disagree with, the context is that he’s a professional philosopher and a super consequentialist, so he was trying to be descriptive rather than prescriptive? “People won’t stop” rather than “people shouldn’t have to stop”? I don’t know. There’s a culture of just blue-skying and devil’s advocating, which is why I do give him credit for trying to elevate women’s voices, because the contrast is the shitty “free speech, you have to debate me about everything!” shit you see on reddit.

I’m presenting this as worse than it was; my point was just bewilderment at how “Just don’t have sex maybe” is considered this bizarre thing to say.

Dalillama: Irate Social Engineer

@tedthefed

there’s no evidence for it

I present as evidence your quotations of his words. That’s a massive fucking red flag right there.

Chris
Chris
3 years ago

@ Heirloom Roses

Can unhappiness be weaponized? How much unhappiness is needed to construct a viable weapon?

If the unhappy person has access to a team of engineers and some kind of fissile material, yes.
Just look at Kim-Jong Un, he managed to weaponize his unhappiness.
As for how much, I’d say inversely proportional with the unhappy person’s power over said team of engineers.

@Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile

California prosecutors originally filed the case in juvenile court, only to have it dismissed. They then tried it in adult court, the Herald reported. “In the end, I pleaded no contest to a misdemeanor,” Tarsey said. “It’s not the charges that matter, it’s what happens in court.”

The US (heck, the whole world) should really invest in some medical research for a cure for affluenza.

Had this Tarsey fellow been born poor (or middle class) he’d have gotten a well deserved and much harsher sentence (juvenile + prison after 18).

“We were blindsided,” Sutton told the Herald. “He’s a member of the Knights of Columbus, for Christ’s sake. And he came highly recommended by the former chair.

Like I said, a really bad case of affluenza.

Bobbie La Bomb
Bobbie La Bomb
3 years ago

@Heritage Roses

Can unhappiness be weaponized? How much unhappiness is needed to construct a viable weapon?

I am very unhappy with the resurgence of white supremacy, and it makes me want dearly to punch Nazis in the dick. So, I think the answer is ‘very unhappy’.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

@Chris
Affluenza: those who contract this awful sickness usually enjoy it.

It’s the rest of us who suffer.

Hypatia's Daughter
Hypatia's Daughter
3 years ago

tedthefed

The thing he seemed bent out of shape about was how unrealistic it was to expect people to make sure their partners were (not?) drunk before having sex.

Here is a quick & dirty “Drunk Test”:
Would you hand them your car keys or your wallet?
If you don’t know them well enough or think they are sober enough to be be trusted with items you value, perhaps you should NOT be putting your dick into their hands and/or bodily orifices. Or have them put their dick into your hands and/or bodily orifices.
Just sayin’……..

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

That makes me feel sick, Podkayne Lives.

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

Of course these assholes are spreading that rumor. Of COURSE they are.

SpukiKitty
SpukiKitty
3 years ago

I really wonder about the mindset of women like DeVos. What makes them tick? Do they really hate themselves that much? What gives?

As for the child who was thrown off the bridge; I’m glad she’s A-OK! That kid’s awesome! I hope they throw the book at the jerk who tossed her.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
September 8, 2017 at 5:17 pm

OT: More on the unbreakable little girl — from the woman whose door she knocked on

Afraid but calm, a 7-year-old girl figured out how to survive the unthinkable

https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/08/30/afraid-but-calm-little-girl-figured-out-how-survive-unthinkable/bNtPmpbE3q0IJcmOLesAYP/story.html?p1=Article_Related_Box_Article

I have to sign up to read it! No fair!

And why did that guy do it? I have yet to see a motive.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

Afraid but calm, a 7-year-old girl figured out how to survive the unthinkable

CRAIG F. WALKER/GLOBE STAFF

Maeve Geary in her yard. The Interstate 290 bridge can be seen in the background.
By Maria Cramer Globe Staff August 30, 2017

SHREWSBURY — A persistent knocking woke Maeve Geary from a deep sleep early Sunday morning. It was still dark. She got out of bed, put on a dressing gown, and walked nervously to the door.

When she switched on the porch light and looked out, she was stunned by what she saw — a small child in pajamas, soaking wet and shoeless at her doorstep. Without a second thought, Geary, a 30-year-old graduate student, flung open the door and brought the young girl inside.

“She was no doubt frightened. Of course she wanted her parents,” said Geary, who recalled staring at the clock and thinking, “It’s pitch black. It’s 4 a.m. This is not right at all.”

The girl, 7, had been kidnapped from a late-night cookout at her grandparents’ Worcester home around 2:30 a.m. by a family friend, Joshua Hubert, according to police.

Hubert, a 35-year-old system support analyst at Fay School in Southborough, allegedly put the child in a car, choked her, then drove her to a bridge over Lake Quinsigamond, where he threw her into the water, authorities say.
Joshua Hubert, left, in court Thursday.

Chris Christo – Pool

Joshua Hubert, left, in court Thursday.

7-year-old survives being choked, thrown into lake

Joshua Hubert, 35, of Worcester was arrested on kidnapping charges.

She survived the drop and managed to swim to shore, straight to the back of Geary’s house overlooking the water.

Hubert, who on Monday was ordered held without bail on kidnapping charges, is slated to appear in Worcester District Court Thursday for a dangerousness hearing, where prosecutors are expected to ask a judge to keep him in custody. Hubert has pleaded not guilty.

On Wednesday, a woman outside the home of the child’s family said no one wished to comment.

Outside Hubert’s home in Worcester, a neatly kept, two-story beige house with maroon shutters, cardboard signs on the porch read “No Trespassing. Keep out.” Officials at Fay School, where Hubert was hired in early July, said he has been suspended indefinitely.

Geary, a Belfast native who studies at the University of Bolton in Manchester, England, moved to Shrewsbury because she wanted to be close to Boston Children’s Hospital and have a quiet place to complete her thesis on how Hollywood special effects can help medical procedures on children.

She has gone swimming in the lake behind her house, which also draws jet skiers, rowboats, and paddleboarders.

“This is so strange,” Geary said Wednesday in an interview from her home.

She said she is still shocked by the experience, but also impressed by the child’s resourcefulness and composure. Police have not specified which bridge the child was thrown from, but on Wednesday morning investigators could be seen walking on the Interstate 290 overpass, the bridge closest to Geary’s home.

The swim from the bridge to the shore behind Geary’s house is at least 100 yards.
The Interstate 290 bridge over Lake Qyinsigamond in Worcester.

CRAIG F. WALKER/GLOBE STAFF

The Interstate 290 bridge over Lake Qyinsigamond in Worcester.

‘I thought “We’re going to make this as normal as possible.’’ ’

Quote Icon

“It’s no mean feat,” said Geary. “She was strong.”

Geary guessed that the child chose her home because it is the closest to the bridge. Geary normally leaves a light on inside the hallway, which was likely visible from the water.

Once the child was inside, Geary began asking her questions — “Where are your parents?” “Do you know where they live?”

The girl remained calm the entire time, and was able to tell her where she lived and how to reach her mother, Geary said. She never cried.

“I’m sure some of her calmness was out of shock,” Geary said, The girl gave her a brief account of what happened, but Geary declined to provide details because she feared it could compromise the police investigation.

As Geary waited for the police, she wrapped the child in a towel and gave her a stuffed animal, a cream-colored, fluffy dog nicknamed “Floppy Dog.”

“I just wanted to make her comfortable and distract her, really,” Geary said. “I thought ‘We’re going to make this as normal as possible.’ ”

The girl changed out of her wet pajamas and into a Spider-Man T-shirt Geary gave her. Geary said she resisted an urge to hug the girl.

“I didn’t know what she’d been through,” Geary said. “I didn’t want to smother her. I just wanted to say ‘You’re fine here.’ ”

Police arrived quickly, and paramedics took the child. Before she left, the little girl tried to give back Floppy Dog, but Geary insisted that she keep it.

Geary would like to write the child a letter, but is worried it might remind her of what she went through. She wants to let the girl, whose quick thinking and strong will helped her survive a terrifying ordeal, know one simple thing.

“You’re brilliant,” she said.

Maria Cramer can be reached at mcramer@globe.com. Follow her on Twitter @globemcramer.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

TW

Mammotheers: This is the bridge the little girl was pushed from — after she was choked.

Gotta quote the “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” theme song:

Fee-males are strong as hell!
comment image

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

@SpukiKitty
So sorry about that paywall. I actually copied the whole story for you — but the Mammoth story-eater devoured it. And now the paywall is up for me too.

I did manage to post a picture of the bridge.

As for the motive, the police have not named one. I can tell you that the little girl’s father and the suspect have been friends since fourth grade, and the suspect had the trust of the family.

NicolaLuna
NicolaLuna
3 years ago

I say this because I am tired of having to live in fear of being persecuted for something I didn’t do because some bitch accused me for personal gain.

The whole “rape = personal gain” thing is so confusing to me. What do they think we gain from rape?

One of the reasons I’ve not been active online for the last year is because last September I was raped. I was only conscious for 2 of the men but the police swabs showed 4 separate DNA sets. Here are some of the things I’ve “gained” from the experience:
-Having to cope through having vaginal and anal swabs taken which was fucking awful and humiliating.
-Being on PEP (post exposure prophylaxis) for a month which made me throw up almost every day.
-Struggling to eat to the point where in the first 6 months after the rape I lost 50lbs.
-Paying for therapy because the local rape crisis service let me down with flakey counsellors so often.
-Starting to self harm again after years without it (I’ve stopped again now).
-Finding out that there were 4 sets of DNA, all from the anal swabs, and that the police have no idea who 2 of them are from and that they can’t find the other 2.
-Having surgery to fix the damage they did and still having one more upcoming surgery.
-Feeling anxious when I hear Romanian men speaking in their own language because the men who did it were Romanian and part of the experience was them speaking to each other in Romanian. And then I feel guilty for feeling anxious just hearing the language because it’s racist to have that association.
-As part of my job, having to do outreach work on the same street where it happened.
-Being told by police that they’ve exhausted avenues of investigation but that if the DNA in my case comes up in any other case they’ll contact me.

-Profit?

It has not been a fun year. I’ve had to struggle through juggling a full time job, working on my part time bachelors degree which is still 18 hours a week, and being a single mum while having all this shit going on.

And considering the horrifically low conviction rate, the fact they want it to be even easier for rapists to escape consequences is just disgusting.

****

On a lighter note…

This is why I voted for trump mainly, He was are best bet in seeing some Lessening of the Gynocentric War on men and masculinity.

I notice he capitalised “He” as though president cheeto is a deity. It could have been a case of just poor grammar or it could be trump-worship.

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
3 years ago

@NicolaLuna
I’m so very sorry to hear about your awful experience and the repercussions from it. It’s torture to feel unsafe in your own skin.

I hope that you’re getting excellent help, and I hope that you’ve been able to make some sort of peace with what happened.

Stay safe. Stay well.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
3 years ago

so he was trying to be descriptive rather than prescriptive? “People won’t stop” rather than “people shouldn’t have to stop”?

Let’s play a game.

If her father suddenly walked in, would you be able to stop?

If the answer is “yes,” then you can stop if you check in and realize she’s drunk.

This myth that men can’t help themselves because: biological urges needs to die.

opposablethumbs
opposablethumbs
3 years ago

NicolaLuna I have no words, I am so so sorry. I hope you have got some support. I hope you are OK. Your courage beggars belief.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
3 years ago

@Nicola
❤❤❤

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

@ nicolaluna

Ugh, all my sympathies.

I wish I could say your experience was uncommon, but you no doubt know it’s not.

That’s why I find it very hard to abide by the comments policy here when stuff like in the original post crops up.

Leo
Leo
3 years ago

@NicolaLuna
That’s awful, I’m so sorry.

If it helps you cope any, I don’t think it’s racist that Romanian men speaking their language is currently a trigger for you, trauma triggers aren’t really something you can control, can be pretty much anything, and it was something relatively unfamiliar in the situation so made an association (hence why English itself probably wouldn’t become a trigger, but a specific word/phrase might).

Dalillama: Irate Social Engineer

@Nicolaluna

All kinds of sympatthy and supportive gestures

Lukas Xavier
Lukas Xavier
3 years ago

I say this because I am tired of having to live in fear of being persecuted for something I didn’t do because some bitch accused me for personal gain.

Then stop. The fear in question exists entirely in your head. It’s not a realistic concern, based on a real life risk. You’re living in fear because you’ve chosen to do so. Simply stop.

If you find that difficult, there a professionals who can help you out. I recommend it.

PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Perpetually Ignored, Invisible but Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

Nicolaluna,

I am so, so sorry you had that happen to you. 😿

NicolaLuna
NicolaLuna
3 years ago

Thanks everyone ❤

I’m actually doing really well now that a year has passed and I’ve been having regular therapy for 3 months.

It was the anniversary on 3rd Sept so I spent the day getting tattooed. For some reason tattoos help me cope with stuff. 1 week after the rape I spent 6 hours getting tattooed because I wanted something on my body that they hadn’t seen, to claim it back.

I’m due to start my 2nd year of uni in a couple of weeks which I’m excited about. And actually the first year started a couple of weeks after the rape so I used the assignments as distraction and got really good results.

The way I’ve made peace with what happened is that my 2 sons are growing up with an in depth understanding of consent. They don’t know what happened to me but they know that if a person doesn’t want to be touched/tickled/kissed etc then you don’t do it.

I just have one more surgery to get through and then my body should be mostly back to how it was before. I’m getting there.

SpukiKitty
SpukiKitty
3 years ago

Kat, ambassador of the feminist government in exile
September 9, 2017 at 2:25 am

@SpukiKitty
So sorry about that paywall. I actually copied the whole story for you — but the Mammoth story-eater devoured it. And now the paywall is up for me too.

I did manage to post a picture of the bridge.

As for the motive, the police have not named one. I can tell you that the little girl’s father and the suspect have been friends since fourth grade, and the suspect had the trust of the family.

It’s so baffling that there’s no known motive. As far as we know; He didn’t sexually assault her (thank goodness). He just inexplicably decided for no known reason to try to kill his best friend’s kid.

People who kill for no reason are really baffling. With this guy, you can’t just ask “Why did you do it?” because he denies he did it despite the kids fingering him as the guy who did it.

All I could think of is that he and his best friend had some sort of dispute and the alleged perp felt the best way to get back at the guy was to kill his daughter.

Maybe killing the girl was part of a larger scheme that never came through, like John Allen Muhammad’s killing spree was allegedly a weird cover for killing his ex (thankfully, she was unharmed).

Perhaps he did want to molest the girl but then he realized he was no longer “in the mood” and just went straight to the later “kill the victim” half of the whole thing.

********

Sometimes you just run into these instances where people kill for absolutely no known reason.

I remember a recent story about a guy who was legally blind who lived with his parents. This past Mother’s Day, he beheaded his mom and killed his new pet dog then walked to the store toting the severed head and attempted to kill the clerk but was overpowered.

The killer’s best friend was interviewed and was utterly baffled as to why his friend, who he described as a really good guy who would never do something like that, would commit such a horrific crime.

The man in question did have some issues and handicaps and lacked teeth due to some weird condition but those who knew him insist he never touched drugs and was a good guy.

But one day….MOTHER’S DAY….he decides to kill his dog and his mom and take her head with him when he tried to kill the clerk.

********

I don’t get these killings that have no motive. Even “I did it for fun” would be considered a motive.

There’s always some sort of “motive” (however stupid).
* The motive could be evil (I did it for fun/To see what it’s like to kill).
* Perverse (I raped and killed because I’m a perv and it turns me on).
* The result of delusions (He was turning into C’thulhu! I had to kill him!).
* Delusions with religion (They were possessed by Satan!).
* Based on really retrograde cultural values (She shamed the family by daring to assume that she was an autonomous human being a equal to men!).
* Various forms of bigotry and hate (He’s gay! She’s black! They’re Muslims! That’s guy’s Jewish! They’re Protestant! etc.).
* Mundane stuff like revenge, money, self-defense, etc.

….but then you have the guy who tossed the girl off the bridge, the guy who beheaded his mom on Mother’s Day and Rudy Eugene in Miami, FL. who for no reason thought it would be just dandy to take off his clothes and gnaw off some old homeless guy’s face (and there was no ‘Bath Salts’ in his system).

….and you wonder why some people believe in stuff like Demonic possession.

Scildfreja Unnyðnes
Scildfreja Unnyðnes
3 years ago

<3 Nicola. You're doin' great. All the love and support. I hope school and kids continue to do well, and that the surgery goes off without a hitch!

IgnoreSandra
3 years ago

@TedtheFed

there’s no evidence for it.

Are you saying you lied about what he said? Because what he said makes it very likely he’s raped someone before or will in the future.

live in fear of being persecuted for something I didn’t do because some bitch accused me for personal gain.

I once accused someone who raped me of committing rape. I’m still waiting for his life to be impacted in any way, and for the alleged material gains I’m supposed to receive for this. He even found time to harass and threaten me on social media afterwards.

Off-topic good news x2 (Possible TMI)

So, two pieces of good news. I tiny boobs now, and a friend of mine started an all-femme D&D 5e group.

I’ve made a pirate sorceress, and I’m going to be taking a few sheets of pirate slang with me because frankly I’m only ever going to be talking like a pirate.

Alex
Alex
3 years ago

After reading Nicola’s experience with rape, how can anyone not wonder about anything other than true justice for her, and those like her. When they roll back these decisions, it’s almost like these political cronies never get it, or care to know about other people’s experiences with rape and hardship, until they or their loved one are affected by it. We need to change our value system in this country, I think it’s broken, and these types of decisions, will only continue that trend.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
3 years ago

@NicolaLuna

I don’t have words that can help, but… have all of my hugs and/or support. I’m glad you’re getting better, and I hope it keeps up.

Tov01
Tov01
3 years ago

@NicolaLuna
All the hugs.