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Otterdance, hedgehog cake, and Chris Christie’s nachos: Today in Tweets

Get in mah belly

By David Futrelle

Good news everyone! Today’s lil Twitter roundup is almost entirely Trump-free! Instead, it’s got dancing otters, a creepy hedgehog, and Chris Christie cradling nachos like a mama gorilla. Also, some angry gamers and a weird new conspiracy theory about Obama.

Let’s get ready to twumble!

https://twitter.com/VicBergerIV/status/891813326019334146

Damn, I could really use some nachos right about now. Nachos are awesome.

Hedgehog cake, not so much.

https://twitter.com/chaeronaea/status/891873357448261632

https://twitter.com/9_volt88/status/891999259742134272

https://twitter.com/zboah/status/892018500780380160

I’m still thinking about those nachos.

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Scildfreja Unnyðnes
Scildfreja Unnyðnes
3 years ago

comment image

banned@4chan.org
banned@4chan.org
3 years ago

@Axecalibur:

That already exists. I have never seen such vain men.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
3 years ago

@Scildfreja

Please tell me this isn’t for real.

They hired Ted Nugent !?

Wicked Witch of Whatever
Wicked Witch of Whatever
3 years ago

@VirginMary
I might be jumping in too late here and I hope you aren’t still stressed by seeing that horrific forum.
I won’t go into the factual inaccuracies about women and strength, because those posts are not really about that at all.
If you are an able-bodied human between the ages of 20 and 40, you are stronger than almost all pre-adolescents and people over 70. And I can’t imagine you’d go on a forum bragging about that, or how you could so easily rape or beat those children and old people. You wouldn’t think those weaker were less than you, just because they couldn’t stop you.
My father often raged at me for my physical weakness as a child, because he wanted my help with his projects, so I sympathise with your shame of physical weakness. The thing is, I got stronger as I grew older, but I’ve never been super physically strong and since an injury and pregnancy I’ve had to give up some remaining illusions about my one-day dream body too. I can promise it is possible to come to terms and love your actual achievable body for what it can do. You will one day be physically weaker, through illness, injury or age, but it will not mean a less worthy you. Easy to say, harder to feel, but you are already stronger than that fuckwit where it really counts.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
3 years ago

@banned
Wooow… The gay crossdresser thread is hilarious for just the first response. And Jew bashing front and center, classic chan. How do these people function? Rhetorical question, but still…

@Oogly

He believes that the reason I’m thinking I’m a woman as an escape mechanism from due to my severe chronic depression, kind of like how when people are sad they wish they had different jobs/parents/lovers/lives/etc

Never heard anything this bullshit from a professional not employed by the Trump administration. Holy hell. Yeah, people with relationship issues fantasize about better relationships. People with career issues imagine better careers. People with gender issues… It’s not that difficult, come on! Fucker…

Thing to remember, finding out your gender is step one. Any other step you take is up to you. In your own way and at your own pace. Also, it’s OK if this doesn’t solve all of your problems. It doesn’t prove this asshat correct if you’re still depressed after taking said steps. Maybe your life and depression are complicated. Maybe there’s more to learn. Plenty of people come out as one thing at first, then end up coming out a bunch more times before they’ve fully understood themselves. Finally, if it works, you’ll know. Like, @Scild said, you’re the foremost and only expert on Ooglology in the world. Trust yourself. I believe in you, buddy!

Moggie
Moggie
3 years ago

OMG, how did I miss this?

In another blow to Scaramucci Monday, Harvard Law School apologized for erroneously listing him as dead in a new alumni directory.

Scaramucci is a 1989 graduate of the Cambridge, Mass., school. A directory mailed to alumni this week included an asterisk by his name indicating he had died.

In a statement, the law school apologized for the error and said it will be corrected in future editions of the directory, which is published every five years. It didn’t provide an explanation for the error.

Life comes at you fast. Just a few days ago, he must have felt like he was on top of the world, and now he’ll appear in the dictionary under “loser”.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
3 years ago

For everyone suffering from depression and/or gender dysphoria, you have my deepest sympathies. I can’t speak about the gender dysphoria issues, but depression and anxiety…yes. I’ve taken SSRI’s for 18 years now. I’ve found them to help a great deal. You do have to give them a month or so to “kick in,” however. I’m sure most people here know this.

Anxiety attacks can be just awful. I have a prescription for a low dose of an anti-anxiety med, but I know they’re super-addictive and withdrawal is hell on earth, so I don’t like to use them often.

I find exercise or really just any sort of physical activity is a definite help. Also, listening to anti-anxiety ambient music helps.

I don’t understand why certain people enjoy trolling complete strangers on the internet, including that vile crap of “all women should be raped.”. Are they so very impotent in their own lives, and I don’t mean sexually, that trolling gives them a sense of power? It never ceases to amaze me, how vile people are capable of behaving, when they believe themselves to be anonymous. I was lucky enough to reach adulthood before the internet took off, and I look back with nostalgia, because there’s so much vitrol I’ve read from commenters…so much I really would rather not have known about my fellow human beings.

Cute tomcat, that last photo of the kitty in the sink. Very jowly.

Robert Walker-Smith
Robert Walker-Smith
3 years ago

Banned, I took a look at that spouting fumarole of flagrant garbage-mindedness. Apparently, someone three inches taller than me is a ‘manlet’.

To paraphrase Jhonen Vasquez, “Oh, no, I have lost the respect of this foul mouthed stranger on the internet! I have no valid reason to live!” Thank the Goddess for the gift of sarcasm.

Nanny Oggs Bosom
Nanny Oggs Bosom
3 years ago

Those otters. Very amusing.

Scildfreja Unnyðnes
Scildfreja Unnyðnes
3 years ago

hee hee! No, @John, that was part of the recent Late Show intro.

Jesalin
Jesalin
3 years ago
Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
3 years ago

@kupo
I just hope I can wade through enough Insurance policies to get what I need. No I do not need gender reassignment surgery, could you please just give me someone to help me work out my gender issues?

@IgnoreSandra
Thank you, fantasies are always fun, all the joy of living in it without the realizations that you can’t articulate that joy in song, words, and pictures.

@Jesalin
Thank you for that, yeah it does sound ridiculous that a depressed person would find escape by pretending to be someone who’d be in a worse position in life.

@Dalillama: Irate Social Engineer
Sorry about that problem Dalil, it’s not fun when bad days happen, especially on sensitive subjects. Thank you for clarifying what I thought and felt but wasn’t able to regarding my former psychiatrist’s advice. If he said that I might have suffered from a persecution complex and the gender issues is to validate my persecution complex, I think I’d not be very polite at that sort of thing.

@Sinkable John
Thank you, and I shall try to find someone else, it was his last week at that medical group so hopefully when I get a transfer to another affiliated psychiatrist, that person would be better on this issue.

@Scildfreja Unnyðnes
That is some good advice, I don’t have much estrogen related foods at hand but I do have a nearby beauty shop/clothing store to go to. For finding time to do it, I’m good at finding time where no one is around or going to notice what I’m doing.

@Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
You’re right Axe, I shouldn’t start thinking if x doesn’t work then everything else is false.

Once again thank you everybody for giving me words I desperately needed to hear.

mrex
mrex
3 years ago

@Dormousing_it

“Also, listening to anti-anxiety ambient music helps.”

What’s ‘anti-anxiety ambient music’?

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

@ dormousing_it

I’m very fortunate that I don’t get anxiety as such, but these tracks have got me through the day a few times.

https://youtu.be/WxRAgEZKMzo

https://youtu.be/1E5TBBM6wbA

https://youtu.be/_cPHGTsp7Xc

(I actually find that last one almost painful to listen to sometimes if that makes sense, it’s just so ‘otherworldly’ beautiful. Works though.)

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
3 years ago

@mrex
I go on YouTube and search “anti-anxiety ” music. There are a huge # of audios out there.

Dormousing_it
Dormousing_it
3 years ago

@Alan Robertshaw

Thanks; I’ll have to check them out.

I suppose I should also swear off all US news. That would be a big help.

JS
JS
3 years ago

@Dormousing_it
You could do what I do, and just swear AT all US news.

Sheila Crosby
3 years ago

Imma leave this here. I hope it makes someone happier.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e59guruVL4o&w=560&h=315%5D

Deathtothefilth
Deathtothefilth
3 years ago

@ooglyboogles
Just as a personal experience, my wife went through a time where she felt she was transgender, and a lot of it was escapism. She went from feeling normal to having gender dysphoria feelings over the course of about 3 months. She’d gotten very heavily involved in the slash community (gay slash) and as near as we can tell here 9 years later it was a combination of a hormone imbalance, her feeling awful about her weight gain and wanting to be someone else, and depression.
Funny enough she got pregnant and the dysphoria vanished like it was never there. (Of course, since I’m pansexual whatever gender she wound up as wouldn’t bother me, but that’s just me). Now I don’t know your situation, and I know a lot of folks who are trans get told they aren’t really, so it’s a tricky subject.

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
3 years ago

@Deathtothefilth
Glad to hear that your wife’s dysphoria went away. I can say for sure that I’m not in any gay smut community, I don’t have trouble with my weight, and I’m perfectly fine with me being me personality wise. On a side note, I bought a tube of lipstick a few days ago. Tbh I’m a bit embarrassed about how happy I got and still get from applying a layer of lipstick when no one is around. It’s like my whole world just lights up. On another note, that psych who told me I was being an escapist was already leaving by the time I came to the appointment. I get a choice of new psychiatrists to go to, hopefully they’re more knowledgeable about gender issues.

Dalillama: Irate Social Engineer

@Oogly

On a side note, I bought a tube of lipstick a few days ago.

Yay!

Tbh I’m a bit embarrassed about how happy I got and still get from applying a layer of lipstick when no one is around. It’s like my whole world just lights up.

*hugs* I’m incredibly happy for you.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
3 years ago

@Oogly

Tbh I’m a bit embarrassed about how happy I got and still get from applying a layer of lipstick when no one is around. It’s like my whole world just lights up

*dawwws forever*

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

Oogly,

When you have the money to spare for a higher end lipstick, I recommend Lancome. They have lots of pretty shades, don’t dry up your lips and last long.

I’m not that well versed with makeup, but that is one of my few recs. Happily, the best mascara is the cheap stuff. Those pink and green tubes by Maybelline.