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By David Futrelle
Watch out, straight dudes! The government is coming for your manhood!
Or at least that’s the accusation being leveled at internet Nazis. On neo-Nazi internet tip sheet The Daily Stormer, the writer known as Zeiger points to a six-month old Science Daily article reporting the results of a large-scale study designed to more accurately determine “normal” testosterone levels in men. Shockingly, to Zeiger at least, the study determined that the old “normal’ range was a bit high. The CDC and medical testing companies are adjusting their standards accordingly.
Zeiger is not pleased. “The chemical castration of the Western male is about to be kicked up to the next level,” he warns. “It’s a transparent push to feminize men and normalize being a low-T f*ggot.”
Zeiger warns that the new “normal” could even lead to the government trying to TERK OUR TERTOSTERONE!
[T]f this process continues, you could start seeing men with healthy testosterone begin to be seen as “pathological” because their levels are “too high” compared with the new standard. So power-lifters who watch their diets could start being prescribed drugs to lower their T levels.
First they came for the power lifters …
Over on his blog, Nazoid pickup artist James “Heartiste” Weidmann raises the alarm in even more outlandish prose.
Mother fucking yahweh, this is a declaration of war against masculinity. The ruling class wants a compliant and pacified herd of puppy dogs in place of the White men who could pose a threat to their ill-gotten and corrupted sinecures.
The soyfatted manboobed weepy feminist nümale is not a meme. It’s real!
Hey, I think he means me!
Think about the implications. Are you a high T man who’s within the formerly normal range of male serum testosterone level? Guess what, you’re now suffering from pathologically high testosterone. Report to your nearest feminization camp for the requisite T-lowering Mazeltov cocktail of beta blockers, SSRIs, estrogen, dissolved birth control pills drawn from the local tap, and opioids.
There is a Western-wide War on Men, because the effete low T Globohomo taintlickers that have somehow wormed their way into power and laugh at the plebs assaulted by Diversity™ from behind their gated communities know…they KNOW fam…that testosterone is the elixir of the god emperors, and a million god emperors whose veins flow with the power of T and whose hearts are opened to ethereal channels of connection to their mighty warrior ancestors through their shared high T heritage are the ONLY FOE WITH THE FORCE OF WILL to oust the degenerate elite from their plush sanctums.
I think Heartiste is huffing something, but it’s not testosterone.
Pull the Goylent feeding tube from your soulgut and reclaim your rightful place in the pantheon of powerful White men as heir to a noble race of warrior poets.
Sorry dude, but making up words like “globohomo” and “Goylant” doesn’t actually make you a poet, much less a warrior.
Our government is evil. It wants to pathologize masculine men and normalize fat women. The bureaucratic machine and its elite operators assault the very notion of Truth and Beauty, which they want replaced with Lies and Ugliness. This is our generation’s war, and I can’t think of a nobler reason to fight than the nature of our enemy…a globalist swarm of soulless atomized grubby usurers with no attachment to anything but their continued power.
So Heartiste is declaring war on … fat people? Well, if it’s on, it’s on. So, fellow fatties, if you ever run across Mr. Weidmann, I suggest you gut-check him to the ground and sit on him.
@JS
That sort of makes sense. Projection seems to be a permanent issue with them. I would find it highly amusing that they tout the superior intellect of the white race and the debunked15 IQ point gap, considering most adherents and proponents of insane conspiracy theories come from said ranks; if not for the fact that these people vote and have a say in policy.
@Diego
I don’t believe “insane” falls into comments policy. Maybe you should review that very thoroughly before making any more comments…
@Troubelle
Duly noted. Outlandish conspiracy theories then. Thanks for the heads up.
@Diego
Just make sure you listen to people–you’ve been tripping over yourself left and right since your arrival. Listen to what the regulars say, and learn from your mistakes.
REGULAR COMMENTERS: Is Diego a troll? This is starting to feel like some kind of infiltrate-the-left social experiment. Just me?
@Still Fiqah
I’m on the fence about that. Earlier I would have said yes, but then they conceded a couple of points, so I am waiting to see. Right now I’m thinking probably just new to intersectional feminism and/or unaware that it’s really not okay to share any and all thoughts you have on things. But they absolutely could be a troll, as Mrs. Chad also conceded a point or two, iirc, before she went full troll flounce on us.
My initial impressions of Diego were formed by the following two comments, the first ones I saw from Diego:
Although the stories told by these two comments are not incompatible exactly? the tones don’t really match up with one another.
@Alan
I thought “taint” refers to the (usually male) perineum. Am I mistaken?
@Mels
I’ve yet to fully understand what taint refers to, even after searching a couple of times.
@Policy of Madness
Mind elaborating on that one?
Yeah. It taint the penis and taint the anus.
You probably have to read that aloud to get it.
The first comment is basically a boast about how simple it is to lose weight (with an implied scolding of anyone who finds it difficult, since the trick is so easy), and the second one is a solicitation for commiseration on how hard it is to maintain weight loss.
Like I said, the stories are not incompatible, but the tones don’t make sense laid against one another. What message are you trying to convey? I can’t figure it out. Do you even know?
“So, fellow fatties, if you ever run across Mr. Weidmann, I suggest you gut-check him to the ground and sit on him.”
I like it. Panda style.
After the “fair game” comment, I’m starting to (⇀︿⇀), but I dunno yet. The spidey sense is tingling, though.
@Policy of Madness
I feel that you assume far too much of what I’m trying to say to the point you’re attributing me things I’m not even saying.
To give both comments context: I was overweight my whole life and I spent years trying to lose it through exercise. It was dieting what finally did the trick. I’m not scolding anyone who finds it difficult. Plenty of people, like me, have the misconception that exercising is what does it. No, you just have to control your intake of sugar.
The second comment came about in the context of another commenter bringing up a study where people who lose weight eventually gain it all back within 5 years. It was after the fact. Upon reading the article I noticed someone saying that only 2 out of 1000 people maintain their weight loss. Suddenly I was struck with the realization that I weight myself everyday and I’m constantly checking myself to make sure I don’t overeat or that I compensante accordingly with exercise. Thus the change of tone. It’s realization.
At this point your comments are starting to come across as personal attacks. I’m willing to listen if I get something wrong but this is coming across as needlessly hostile.
You’d think they’d be happy with the official average T-level being adjusted downward, because it means more of them would fall into the “above average” range.
http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110520072626/southpark/images/5/5c/TMI27.png
There you go again, generalizing an entire complicated metabolic process based on your own personal experience.
Edit: The hostility you’re feeling isn’t needless.
@pom I’m neither defending nor condemning diego. But “losing weight is easy, I have to watch every mouthful or gain it all back” is stupidly common and worthy of an eye roll, but maybe not the side eye?
Edited to say:
Oh damn, are we doubling down on “my diet work, ignore all those peer reviewed studies you’ve read”
How. . .disappointing.
And what if someone controls their intake of sugar and that does jack-all, because one-size-fits-all dieting advice is shit? How does your one weird trick account for that? See, this is why people reacted poorly to that comment – something that you never acknowledged in that thread – and why I continue to react poorly to it. I’m glad it worked for you, but the key words there are for you. Your attempt to universalize your experience implies that other people are just doing it wrong, and since the one weird trick is so simple and obvious some ugly implications get baked in.
That second comment isn’t really an issue, it was just strange how it sounded after the first one. Thanks for clarifying it, but that doesn’t relieve the first one of its problems.
Yes, please do tone police me. That’s definitely what my day lacked. I’m coming across as hostile because I feel kind of hostile, but I would dispute that it is needlessly that way. From my perspective, you’ve earned a lot more hostility than I’m showing you, and I’m being pretty lenient with you. But yes, critique my tone some more, that is always a great way to engage someone.
Also, recommending a diet specifically for weight loss is fucking harmful. Fat is not a disease; it’s a tissue. Having fat is not something that is bad or wrong or unhealthy. There’s absolutely no reason to give unsolicited advice to anyone on how to alter their diet to reduce the amount of fat they have on their body. People who have been emotionally damaged because of their weight are harmed by your “advice.”
I read stuff like these idiots write and I feel so bad for sniggering at the Time Cube guy.
Nahh, what got the side-eye was another thread entirely where Diego’s position is that everyone is fair game when it comes to being hit on or solicited for a relationship. If you haven’t read it, it’s a bizarre conversation. It’s on the creepy-boss-of-the-week post.
The “is Diego a troll” question is what brings me back to the first two comments of Diego’s that I saw. I don’t actually care that Diego is trying to give out dieting advice – as weaksauce as that is, there are bigger fish in the other thread.
I’ll say it once more, since diego didnt respond the first time, replacing starches with potatoes and cutting off all other sugar would *murder* my mister.
I’m rooting for you diego, you’re soo close to getting it.
It’s stupidly naive, but I’m not thinking troll. (Everyone gets the benefit of the doubt in clever-world. I do not expect anyone else to feel that way, and if he needs to go I totally get and respect the will of the regs.)
@Clever
One-size-fits-all food advice will always be wrong for someone. For your husband, potatoes are unhealthy; for me kale, often promoted as the healthiest food of all times, will make me sick. It’s as if bodies are varied in how they process nutrients. 😉
@kupo, oh absolutely, I just like to occasionally drive home the point that diet advice can, and does kill. You’d be surprised at the number of high potassium foods people want to foist on *my dude of the dead kidneys*
Super sorry about the kale tho. 🙁