Creepiest “Friend Zone” meme I’ve seen in a long time

@ Bakunin

He’s got a tumblr, if you’re interested- more personal updates than the sex-BDSM-feminism articles of the old blog, though:

http://pervocracy.tumblr.com

She’s even tipping it!

M’boy

Cosby deliberations: Initial non-binding vote was unanimous to acquit on all three counts. Final deadlocked vote was eleven to one to acquit on “victim was unconscious or unaware”, ten to two to convict for “digitally penetrating accuser without consent” and “gave victim drugs or intoxicants without her knowledge, substantially impairing her for the purpose of preventing her resistance”.

http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/cosby-holdouts-prevented-guilty-verdict-juror/story?id=48195733

@ nequam

some little girl coloring in their own brightly pattered fedora/trilby

She’s Fedorable!

ETA: Oh, just realised it actually says that on the box.

It’s amazing that these men think a woman being friends with a man is “using him for friendship”.

Do they feel the same way about their male friends one wonders?

@weirwoodtreehugger

I have HBO through Amazon Prime and it works really well – although I have never watched something simultaneously when it is on TV (and I think you can, I just never have had to) I am able to watch VEEP and American Gods (which is Starz)literally minutes after they are over. (I am usually busy when they are on).

So I would recommend it! Plus I think it might be cheaper? I think I pay less for both Starz and HBO than I did when I was just doing HBO NOW.

Also isn’t it just ‘using someone’ like if they are straight out ‘using you’ then they aren’t really being ‘friends’ because being a friend should be a reciprocal relationship. Am I using everyone for the friendship they give me? Am I using my family for the love and support they give me? My worldview is blown.

On the topic of Laci Green:

Yeah, I came to the same conclusion as Coughlin and the other Mammotheers that have commented on her “red pilling” for lack of a better term. Martin Hughes over at BarrierBreaker had quite the insightful take about burnout from doing activism for the wrong reasons, which echoed Coughlin’s “it’s not about you” thesis a couple weeks beforehand: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/barrierbreaker/not-laci-green/

And like Coughlin, I didn’t watch Laci’s videos because as a similarly 30-somethingish man they weren’t targeted towards me. But I thought that at the very least she had seen enough of the garbage people about the internet to really understand what the stakes are. Apparently… not.

I just don’t get it. I mean, I’m here because I see the moral imperative of it. Having witnessed the kind of online harassment women and girls have to put up with firsthand with Elevatorgate and then Gamergate, I couldn’t just pretend that feminism was something that wasn’t necessary in 21st century “Western” society. I felt an obligation to push back against these insidious attitudes amongst my own peer group.

And like others, I’ve tried it every way I can, but there’s no middle ground on the issues at play here. Laci seems to be under some kind of misapprehension (being as generous as I can) that there’s some kind of middle ground where feminists and the “antis” can just understand each other and hug it out (she literally said that on Twitter).

No, Laci. When it comes to people’s very concept of themselves, their very identities, the core of who they are, there’s no meeting halfway here. The antis are quite clear that they want to misgender and outright ridicule trans people, are clearly opposed to social movements like BLM despite the acquittal of Philando Castile’s murderer painting clear evidence that a move to reform policing is desperately needed, and oppose initiatives to reduce the prevalence of sexual assault. These are not topics I can in good conscience budge on, particularly when I’m not the one directly affected by them.

And a lot of us have been encountering these attitudes for decades. I probably got into my first flame war with an Islamophobe back when I first started opining on politics on the DeviantART forums back in ’03, when the Iraq War had been underway for eight months. That’s almost 14 years ago. Laci, I get that you’re younger than me, but talk with anybody my age or older and none of this is new.

Nor is it really all that interesting. I watch plenty of YouTube feminists engage with “the other side”, so we’re not ignorant of what they’re all about. We just happen to find that the Dissenting Opinions™ these jokers have undermine the very identity and autonomy of their fellow human beings. Sure, they’ll dress it up in high-minded principles of “free speech” or “rationality”, but scratch below the surface and their bigotry becomes apparent very quickly.

Anyway, sorry about the rant. I tried to get her to at least see that forming a friendship with transphobic trans individual Blaire White was trouble, but I’m done at this point. She can do what she wants.

The reality is, we have 63million voters who at very least support the idea that non-whites, non-christians, non-cis/het people and women “have too many rights”. We have a squatter in the white house who campaigned and won on a platform of promising to destroy those people with the “too many rights”, we have a controlling party in the U.S. Congress, and apparently also in many states, who are excited about the opportunity and who are eagerly embracing the agenda, and apparently we have enough voters to keep them in power.

I’m not going to say how bad I believe this really is going to get, because that’s not contributing to the solution, and it’s speculation, anyway. I will say, and this is mostly to all the “Laci Greens” out there, if you want a gauge of the merit of the values you’re standing up for, a good way to gauge that is to look at who you’re standing up WITH… and you’re standing up with people who voted for a monster specifically and exclusively because he promised to make it socially acceptable for them to publicly abuse everyone who is NOT LIKE THEM.

@Citizen Rat

Yeah, those were the days eh? No Facebook, no Twitter, Livejournals were a thing… but yeah, the DA Forums were my first exposure to that seedy underbelly of the right-wing mind. It was bad enough encountering people willing to justify a war founded on lies, but it was also there that I encountered my first “race realists” who just spammed me with links to R. Philippe Rushton and Kevin Macdonald (not the fun Kid in the Hall, either).

This was probably around 2006-2007, so while these might be new ideas to the doe-eyed youngsters of this zany YouTube-Facebook-Twitter-Instagram world, I’ve been batting ’em down one troll at a time since the Dubya administration. I think that’s one thing that kinda gets me about these younger millennials (and maybe it’s true of young people in general): they seem to think they’re the first ones to experience these cultural and political issues. Ted Kennedy of 1980 called, Bernie stole his schtick. Shit, in 1980, gay marriage was a pipe dream. For a lot of young people, that battle seemed to last six months.

I don’t mean to be a mean ol’ Jives telling kids to get off his lawn. I mean, I’m turning 32 this week, so even the Kennedy ’80 campaign was before my time. But my personal politics came about through a long journey of interactions, so some twerp with a YouTube “just asking questions” about “white birth rates” or “why other countries aren’t forced to be multicultural” (*cough* Chris Ray Gun *cough*) is old hat to plenty of us.

@Weird Eddie

Banjo-smashing was to indicate that there’s no way I can make a proper song out of this shit.

@kupo:

I never got into Laci because back when I started seeing her videos shared a lot I saw some people pointing out that she was very problematic. Then I watched one of her videos and noticed some gender essentialism and noped the hell out of there.

Same here. I always got kind of a hinky vibe off her, and couldn’t put a finger on what it was that wasn’t adding up. Then the transphobia got airtime, and it all clicked. And she didn’t exactly have her head clear on the whole “friendzone” thing to begin with, either. No wonder she’s a sucker for the now fashionable “red-pill”, or as we of the jet set call it, “the throwing others under the bus thing”. Glad my instincts were good, even if I couldn’t figure out why my spidey-sense was making so much noise.

Srsly, though: This is why I have no more conservative friends. NONE. Not even moderately ‘wingy ones. I know how the other side thinks. I want none of it, and I sure as hell ain’t debating it, never mind DATING it.

Your ribs will be broken. Your face will be broken.

That’s just a fun night out for me. Bring it on.

your name is going on a list

Please could you make sure you spell it correctly (it’s just the one ‘L’); and if you would be kind enough to actually turn up this time, that would be peachy.