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The Daily Stormer notices the profile of me in the New York Times, declares victory

Woody Guthrie’s true successor

By David Futrelle

Truly, there is nothing that the alt-right won’t declare a victory. Like, for example, the profile of me that ran this week in the New York Times, which Daily Stormer writer Eric Striker insists is a sign that he and his Nazi pals are “winning the culture war.”

In a post with the thoughtful headline “Jew York Times Writes Fluff Piece Promoting Professional Cuckold David Futrelle,” Striker complains that the NYT, er JYT

gave David Futrelle his first ever blowjob yesterday.

That’s the only word that could describe the promotional profile, which presented Futrelle as some sort of sardonic internet vigilante holding back the Nazi night.

He sounds a little mad.

In reality, all this fink does is copy and paste young men blowing off steam about women in their own spaces online. The entries are followed by feline Comic Book Guy style “Worst. Post. Ever…” snark.

Definitely mad.

Striker concludes his devastating critique of this little blog by calling me a “cuck.”

Being a man nowadays is hard, Futrelle takes the easy route. He is celebrated by elites at the Gray Yenta because he proudly accepts his status as a eunuch – what feminist women themselves deride as “Cuck Bois.”

Then, after cutting and pasting nearly the entire NYT piece, he declares FLAWLESS VICTORY.

[T]he system is giving Futrelle’s corporate product free promotion because the liberal bench is shallow and we’re winning the culture war. 

WINNING!

This is a good sign, it means they can’t find the young Woody Guthrie or Rage Against The Machine so they have to settle for Man Boobz the internet blogger.

Huh? I’m not quite sure how I ended up in some sort of contest with the ghost of Woody Guthrie, but this did give me an excuse to post my little “this machine kills fascists” pic at the top of the post.

The “rules” Futrelle is so upset about people breaking are that feminism and the sexual revolution can never be challenged. Not even among teenage boys playing computer games.

That’s because the whole house is built on sand. One puff from the big bad Fascist wolf and Futrelle is blown the fuck out along with his wall of framed cat pictures.

Ok, first off, the houses that the big bad wolf blew away were made of straw and sticks, respectively, not sand. Seriously, dude. Preschoolers know this.

Second, I’m really not quite sure why my fondness for cats gets these dudes so mad, but let’s see if I can give a few of them heart attacks with this lil picture I made with the help of Dreamscopeapp.com.

No one knows what it’s like, to be the bad man, to be the sad man, behind blue kitten eyes

Striker ends his post, somewhat unexpectedly, by asking you ladies reading this for a date:

And by the way David, since I know you’re reading this, just know that all the women who comment on your website would rather sleep with a misogynistic, muscular and dominant “Neo-Nazi” who berates them over you.

Ok, ladies, form a line on the (far) right!

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Jef Rouner
3 years ago

… did that guy just claim you invade their safe spaces?

Diego Duarte
Diego Duarte
3 years ago

I hardly think these Neo Nazis are as athletic, dominant or muscular as they believe themselves to be.

Rather start calling them fascists or start any sort of altercation with them and they will immediately run to Youtube to whine and cry about how antifa are the new fascists.

Feral Crone
Feral Crone
3 years ago

Why would women want to have sex with a man who hates and resents women?
For his sperm?
Dream on.

Dan Kasteray
Dan Kasteray
3 years ago

uh, winning the culture war?

I don’t mean to hurt these guys feelings but in the next Wolfenstein game I’ll be taking my policy comments unsafe vengeance on a new Nazi regime. Just saying, I’m not the only white man disgusted by Nazi ideas and actions.

Also, being in the New York times is a bad thing? Why?

JS
JS
3 years ago

“Where are we going, and why are we in these handbaskets?”
“No problem! We’re winning, winning I tell you!”

(for non-natives, please reference idiom “going to hell in a handbasket”)

Tuxedo cats are my favorites

Fishy Goat
Fishy Goat
3 years ago

just know that all the women who comment on your website would rather sleep with a misogynistic, muscular and dominant “Neo-Nazi” who berates them over you.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!

Dream on, Nazi ‘boi’.

Vanir85
Vanir85
3 years ago

attacking women’s humanity, hating their freedom and wanting their rights gone, is «blowing off steam»?

«being a man» is only hard, if it’s hard accepting that women should have as many rights, and as much of a place in society, the workforce and politics, as men

and if that is hard; then fuck you.

PeeVee the (Timber-Rattling Booger Slut, But Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Timber-Rattling Booger Slut, But Noice) Sarcastic
3 years ago

Hmmm. *Weighs choices*

Should I read the site the SPLC sues the owner of, or the site the SPLC mentions as a resource against hate?

Viscaria the Cheese Hog
Viscaria the Cheese Hog
3 years ago

I can’t imagine one could make a living as a professional cuck. It would just be too arduous to be constantly marrying and then divorcing. I could see someone making a tidy sum as the man who comes in and sleeps with the wives, though.

he proudly accepts his status as a eunuch

He does?

– what feminist women themselves deride as “Cuck Bois.”

We do?

Jennifer
Jennifer
3 years ago

I know it is besides the point and unrelated to why you do this, but, speaking as a woman, you are exactly my type: intelligent, insightful, and believes me to be an equal, not an object.
The alt right and most misogynists seem to fetishize violence and aggression and they mistakenly believe that women are also attracted to those things. And, since we are all separate individuals, some of us are, but many of us are repulsed by their idea of strength. Not to mention, the poor quality of their writing (spelling, grammar, structural, and logical errors) is often a real turn off.

Any ways, congratulations on your well deserved recognition and thank you for all of your great work.

PaganReader - Misandrist Spinster

all the women who comment on your website would rather sleep with a misogynistic, muscular and dominant “Neo-Nazi” who berates them over you.

Ew no.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
3 years ago

what feminist women themselves deride as “Cuck Bois.”

Pretty sure you mean ‘fuccbois’. With 2 Cs

feminism and the sexual revolution can never be challenged. Not even among teenage boys playing computer games

Not sure why they specifically should get a pass, but whatevs

all the women who comment on your website would rather sleep with a misogynistic, muscular and dominant “Neo-Nazi” who berates them over you

Ya know? I’m not sure if he’s tryna woo the Mammoth gals or neg Futrelle…

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

some sort of sardonic internet vigilante holding back the Nazi night.

Now that I know you’re such a badass, I expect you to go back in time and kill baby Hitler.

what feminist women themselves deride as “Cuck Bois.”

Is he completely making this up? Or did one feminist say this ironically to mock alt-righties and he took it seriously? Or maybe they fell for a straw feminist troll post on reddit somewhere? Because I sure haven’t heard a feminist woman or for that matter any woman at all refer to non misogynistic men as cuck bois.

Iseult The Idle
Iseult The Idle
3 years ago

what feminist women themselves deride as “Cuck Bois.”

[Citation needed]

Fishy Goat
Fishy Goat
3 years ago

@WWTH :

comment image

History Nerd
History Nerd
3 years ago

I know white nationalist types who voted for Obama in 2008 because they were angry at Bush. They said they didn’t like that Bush enforced civil rights laws, supposedly signed a bill making it easier to collect child support, supported the sex offender registry, and claimed he wanted to help the Iraqis.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

Hi, can I pick the IT skills of one of the many tech savvy Mammotheers? I need to set up a burner email account so I can post a response on the Stormer site. I’m happy to use my real name and photo, but I’d rather not end up subscribed to loads of dodgy sites and newsletters. I’m getting a bit bored of their keyboard machismo so I’ve got a fun challenge for them. 🙂

ETA: which I might have to clarify in light of David’s post just now 😀

RosieLa
RosieLa
3 years ago

What’s weird is that they might like the coureurs de bois for their tough manhood, which is how my brain reads “cuck bois”

JS
JS
3 years ago

You can just setup another gmail account if you’ve got an email address. I’ve got 3 of those, and 2 yahoo acounts, one of which gets enough spam I always have the opportunity to acquire my unexpected inheritance. Google and Yahoo mail have a fairly quick method to switch between accounts, without having to keep putting in password each time.

It’s easy enough to cancel/delete after use, or just let it collect more stupid to mock at leisure.

Or you can use a mailinator.com email address, which is essentially public totally not secure email, if you’re not putting ANY private info on it. It’d be enough to get “verified email address”, though you might have to try several of the 100s of domains that point back to mailinator.

Laughing at Fuckbois
Laughing at Fuckbois
3 years ago

He is celebrated by elites at the Gray Yenta because he proudly accepts his status as a eunuch – what feminist women themselves deride as “Cuck Bois.”

Haha wooooow, as if I needed any more proof that these people have never met a feminist in their lives. Yeah, little Nazis, of *course* we think the people who consistently degrade us as less than human while desperately trying bang us are the enlightened ones—you’re definitely not sneered at as the fuckbois you are. Meanwhile, people who actually stand up for us against that bullshit are “cuck bois”, a term I’ve literally never seen before today and no feminist has ever used in her life! Truly iconic projection you’ve got going on there, assholes.

just know that all the women who comment on your website would rather sleep with a misogynistic, muscular and dominant “Neo-Nazi” who berates them over you.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLL sure incels, keep telling yourselves that women have a lustful obsession with muscular, dominant, asshole men. Of course that’s the reason you can’t get a woman to sleep or stay with you, not your rotten, shit-filled brains that we can smell as soon as you open your mouths.

brian
brian
3 years ago

You’re a professional cuckold now, David? Congrats on the new job, I guess! Does that pay well? I could use a new job myself…

Gussie Jives
Gussie Jives
3 years ago

“Cuck Bois”… is that a variant of the hautbois?

Sally forth me if I’m wrong, but I can’t say I’ve ever heard a feminist use that phrase unironically.

I’m also willing to bet “Eric Striker” isn’t the author’s real name. Because somehow “Clifford” isn’t quite manly enough for your average white nationalist.

(Apologies to all Cliffords.)

Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
3 years ago

Someone’s salty I see.
Love their tricks by the way. Claim other people’s success as your own even if it has nothing to do with you.
That’s pretty much the only way to keep their base convinced of their power, since they don’t win shit EVER.

JS
JS
3 years ago

The Stormer is the sort of site that wouldn’t take “I’m not a eunuch” as an acceptable answer, and require physical proof that all the wedding tackle was in order… unless it was an alt-right person claiming it, in which case, it would be considered true regardless of actual penile presence.

The double standard is strong with this one.

Katz
3 years ago

He was a cuck boi
She said “Good Luck, boi”

Ooglyboggles
3 years ago

Is there a comprehensive health insurance plan for Professional Cuccbois?

Falconer
Falconer
3 years ago

Is there a comprehensive health insurance plan for Professional Cuccbois?

There won’t be if McConnell manages to shove his secret billionaire-tax-break bill through the Senate.

All the Republican senators are talking big and sitting on their hands.

History Nerd
History Nerd
3 years ago

I’d say Trump and his movement are closer to George Wallace or Huey Long than the Nazis. But Wallace and Long were both on the fascist spectrum and the American Nazi Party campaigned for Wallace. Both were demagogues who used race and class resentment to get votes and their views on fiscal policy were all over the place.

Moggie
Moggie
3 years ago

JS:

Or you can use a mailinator.com email address, which is essentially public totally not secure email, if you’re not putting ANY private info on it. It’d be enough to get “verified email address”, though you might have to try several of the 100s of domains that point back to mailinator.

You’re not kidding about the “several”. I’ve found that some sites blacklist as many of mailinator’s domains as they can figure out.

protonmail.com offer free and highly secure mailboxes. Good for anyone who cares about privacy, but always accessing via a VPN might be advisable if you’re paranoid.

Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
3 years ago

@Alan

I’m getting a bit bored of their keyboard machismo so I’ve got a fun challenge for them. 🙂

AAAAAH curiosity is killing me! If you succeed in whatever you plan to do please let us know and give us the details! 😃

Damian
Damian
3 years ago

This is why this stuff is never not funny:

(1) What feminist has ever used the term “cuck”? What actual, normal person has ever used this term? And if feminists are using this term among themselves in secret, he knows this … how?

(2) Is he actually trying to convince the commenters here that they’ve slept with him? Wouldn’t they know if they did?

(3) Is this “puffing” a threat, or has this already happened, and Dave’s been unaware of being blown down along with his walls, or whatever? Is Striker suggesting that his article isn’t even this much, since it’s just being laughed at rather than having the promised wall-blowing effect?

(4) Patton Oswalt once described James Lipton has having such a powerful “failed actor” stink-aura pouring out of him that he looked like a blurry, wavy mirage from an old western. That’s Striker and his sexual anxiety.

Francesca Torpedo, Femoid Special Forces Major
Francesca Torpedo, Femoid Special Forces Major
3 years ago

@Sir Alan

https://www.guerrillamail.com

It’s dangerous to go alone, milord. Take this.

@Re: the article

I’m disquieted by how the neonazi fuccboi seems to fantasize about David getting blowjobs.

@Axe

Ya know? I’m not sure if he’s tryna woo the Mammoth gals or neg Futrelle…

Well, there are a lot of Superior Aryan White Women who post here.

Am I wrong?

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

@ JS & Moggie

Heh, I understood many of those words on an individual basis. Basically just need it explaining like you would to a moderately intelligent Labrador (or if anyone wants to set it up for me *smiles hopefully*)

In unrelated news this brought a bit of minor relief to an otherwise horrible situation over here. Whatever one may think of the job of being Queen it’s hard to deny she’s pretty damn good at it…

http://www.unilad.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/akn1092.jpg

guest
guest
3 years ago

OT: this is where we are now.

https://www.artforum.com/news/id=68963

‘Classicist Receives Death Threats from Alt-Right over Art Historical Essay’

D
D
3 years ago

@ History Nerd

The way I like to put it is:

Donald Trump = Silvio Berlusconi meets Benito Mussolini meets George Wallace meets a box of rocks.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

@ aulma

Just sorting out the practical side. So as soon as can figure out this email issue I’ll fill you in. 🙂

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

@Nazi Striker

Hey, I haven’t met you.
And this is [ableist language redacted].
But here’s my anonymous online pseudonym.
So cuck me maybe?

Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
3 years ago

@alan great! 😀
@guest

OT: this is where we are now.

https://www.artforum.com/news/id=68963

‘Classicist Receives Death Threats from Alt-Right over Art Historical Essay’

Oh well, I’m not surprised. They already decided to attack anyone who might try to correct their favourite version of history/art.
At this point they don’t even care if they’re right or not, they just want to be seen as victims.

Hambeast, disorderly she-tornado and breaker of windows
Hambeast, disorderly she-tornado and breaker of windows
3 years ago

Axe said

Ya know? I’m not sure if he’s tryna woo the Mammoth gals or neg Futrelle…

And Fran responded

Well, there are a lot of Superior Aryan White Women who post here.

Am I wrong?

No, as long as I’m not expected to look like Marlene Dietrich in “Song of Songs” or anything.

Regardless of whom he might be trying to woo or neg here, we all know it’s gonna be a colossal pail o’ FAIL.

Personally, I’d rather throw myself at the mercy of the Hoteps than date a white power type.

Alan – As a USian, all I can say is: God Save the (way more badass than the the PM) Queen! I think she and Ruth Bader Ginsburg would get on very well.

edited to fix a typo

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
3 years ago

Truly, there is nothing that the alt-right won’t declare a victory.

Y’know, I’ve always wondered just who buys those “I pooped today!” t-shirts.

Now I know.

Moggie
Moggie
3 years ago

Alan:

Heh, I understood many of those words on an individual basis. Basically just need it explaining like you would to a moderately intelligent Labrador (or if anyone wants to set it up for me *smiles hopefully*)

The important question with this sort of thing is: what’s your threat model? What are you worried about? I think you made that clear, but, when giving advice online, one always needs to be aware that lurkers may follow the advice in cases where it’s not really applicable, and get burnt, so…

If you want to sign up at some site which requires an email address, and you’re concerned that this will result in your inbox filling up with spam, misspelled death threats, enquiries from marine mammals etc, a mailinator.com address is a good solution. There’s no setup involved: if, say, you fancy the address labrador@mailinator.com, just hand out that address. That mailbox either already exists, or will spring into existence the first time it receives mail. You need to understand the following things:

1. There is absolutely no privacy. It’s a webmail service with no passwords, so anyone can read any mailbox. In fact, if you pick a common word like “labrador” for the user part, it’s likely that someone is already using that address, and possibly reading the mail. Don’t use mailinator if you have reason to believe that someone might send mail to it which would be harmful to you if seen by others.

2. You may lose mail, so it’s only for mail you really don’t care about. Just as anyone can read any mailbox, anyone can delete messages from any mailbox, before you get to see them.

3. It’s receive-only. If you need to be able to send mail from a burner mailbox, and don’t have enough technical savvy to be able to forge mail, mailinator is not suitable. (Remember that recent Google Docs phishing mail which hit the news because it was sent to many journalists? That was forged from a mailinator.com address)

4. Because of its burner nature, some sites don’t accept mailinator addresses. For example, you sign up at a site, it says “check your inbox for a confirmation link we’ve sent you”, but you receive nothing, because their software recognises that it’s a burner domain and doesn’t bother sending the confirmation link. For this reason, mailinator.com have a large number of alternate domains, and when you visit the site it picks one at random to tell you about – but that leads to a kind of arms race.

5. The mailinator.com FAQ used to have an entry something like “we won’t go to jail for you”. If you (not you you, but someone reading this) were to hide behind a mailinator address when poking a hornet’s nest, and law enforcement contacted mailinator and said “please supply any IP addresses which checked the ipunchnazis@mailinator.com mailbox between time x and time y”, don’t count on your identity remaining private for long.

I mentioned protonmail.com. If you care about privacy, I recommend you read what they have to say about their service, including such Theresa May-baiting features as encryption and not keeping IP logs (well, so they claim). Setting up a protonmail.com mailbox is really easy, and if you don’t intend to use it heavily the free plan is sufficient.

VPNs… eh, probably a topic for another day.

Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
Aulma Frendzar Dèdd
3 years ago

@Hambeast

Personally, I’d rather throw myself at the mercy of the Hoteps than date a white power type.

Brave. Given those choices I’d rather snap my own neck.

Checkmate
Checkmate
3 years ago

@Chairs, not everyone who buys those. My mom has one she wears around the house, as does my little brother (age 21). He’s severely autistic, and they both have intestinal issues, so it makes him feel better to see her wear it too. <3

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

@ moggie

Think I might be sorted. Should know in an hour or so.

dreemr
dreemr
3 years ago

Hotep or White Power dude? Makes me so friggin’ glad I am past the wall, obese, and uninterested in sex.

@SFHC you always make me laugh.

@Fran

Well, I’m a white woman, but I doubt I’d fit the Superior Aryan model. My swarthy, somewhat dumpy eastern European roots definitely show.

You know all those old photos of older women back in the 30s and 40s, how they look kind of like million-year-old potatoes wearing a babushka even thought they’re, like, 45 years old? Yeah, that’s my heritage, and it shows 😉

Ashley Kowalchuk
3 years ago

I have never, ever referred to anyone as a ‘cuck boi’ but I’m wondering if I should start? And I do regularly read this blog; neo-nazi misogynists are definitely not my type. Not even mere neo-nazis. The misogynists are harder to totally weed out since the latent ones don’t necessarily shave their heads or hail each other with weird salutes. Mr. Futrelle, if for some reason we’re ever in the same room as this man, I am loudly and obnoxiously asking you out on a super hot date that he definitely can’t have.

blackrising
blackrising
3 years ago

I like how Mr. Striker blatantly shows his own sexual insecurities by how the only ‘scathing’ closing insult he can come up with is ‘the women who read your stuff would rather sleep with me than you!’.
(Which is patently untrue and while I don’t wish to speak for everyone here, I do believe the people commenting on here would take David over a mysogonistic Neo-Nazi any day. And even over other types of dudes! Because women have different preferences! Who would have thought?)

And yes, of course women secretly hate ‘beta guys’ and call them ‘cuck bois’ because what woman would ever want to be regarded as an equal? We just claim otherwise to draw the attention of those sexy sexy mysogonists. Take me you hot Alpha dudeman you /s

Friendly Neighborhood Dragon Arthur
Friendly Neighborhood Dragon Arthur
3 years ago

Pretty sure that most of the women here who are into guys most likely want to be with guys who like cats, aren’t “alphas”, and can actually “win” at something.

I’m just some dude who likes hoovy things, scaly things, building things, and smashing Nazis with hammers.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

My IT uselessness is so spectacular I’ve managed to pass it on to my friend who was helping me, so….

Is there anyone here who can (with no risk to themselves) create the Stormer account for me and then send me the login details via David? Like I say, I want it in my own name. I can also send you a profile pic to upload. If you’re feeling especially kind I could also send the initial post I want to make.

Then I just need to be able to respond to any comments that may appear.

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