Apparently this whole “Make America Great Again” thing isn’t quite going as planned. Our #SecondPlacePresident, facing massive resistance and beset by scandals that won’t go away, is throwing temper tantrums in the White House. Pro-Trump rallies across the country are drawing embarrassingly tiny crowds.
Oh, and his supporters are having trouble getting anyone to care about the latest challenge to #MAGA-style machismo — the temporary transformation of the Brawny Man into the Brawny Woman.
Yep, as a sort of tribute to Women’s History Month, the makers of Brawny paper towels have temporarily replaced the iconic Brawny Man on their packaging with a Brawny Woman sporting a red flannel shirt with lipstick to match. But those outraged by this gender switcheroo can’t even get #BoycottBrawny trending on Twitter.
It’s not for want of trying.
https://twitter.com/TeaPartyOne1/status/837828563940212736
Oh, wait, that’s a parody account.
How am I supposed to explain the Brawny woman to my children
— Ken Jennings (@KenJennings) March 4, 2017
Oh, wait, that’s a former Jeopardy champion making a joke.
https://twitter.com/MommiesGoneBad/status/838178752416841728
I can’t tell if this account is a complete joke or only a partial joke, though I am a bit concerned to learn that he wipes his ass with paper towel packaging.
Now even paper towels are virtue signaling. pic.twitter.com/NtGOL1iicV
— Stefan Molyneux, MA (@StefanMolyneux) March 4, 2017
Finally! This guy, at least, is serious.
And a handful of others have joined this lonely crusade.
https://twitter.com/TrumpGal7/status/838043131887161345
https://twitter.com/zacharydolan121/status/838172116998631424
Wow too bad businesses can't stick to just advertising their goods Instead of their political views Time to #BoycottBrawny https://t.co/aF9fl6QcxI
— TalentsMomMlg 🇺🇸🗽✝ (@TalentsMomMLG) March 4, 2017
https://twitter.com/JRtheDeplorable/status/838121087783305216
https://twitter.com/1luckymom17/status/838181852519133187
This person is so mad that anyone could possibly suggest that “strength has no gender” that they posted a little manifesto on Brawny’s webpage.
.@Brawny I will #BoycottBrawny over your ill-conceived ad campaign #StrengthHasNoGender and urge others to do so. Here's why. pic.twitter.com/mvHWAIcQZc
— SCLaw (@_SCLaw_) March 4, 2017
Hey, some transphobia!
its bruce i mean katelyn on the brawny paper towel lol
our sin has blinded us to reality in the USA
— binky barnes (@realynsh1) March 5, 2017
@brawny? When are we going to see tranny paper towels?
— Russ Larrivee (@rjlarrivee) March 5, 2017
This critic, meanwhile, was bothered only by Brawny Woman’s hair.
does strength also have no conditioner bitch if you don't use this brawny money on some Pantene Pro-V then ima be out for ya life. pic.twitter.com/OQ5p6LHucO
— ♡♪!? (@SkyWilliams) March 5, 2017
The weird thing here is that Brawny is a Koch Bros. brand; it’s already being boycotted, but by progressives.
@ numberobis
Thanks for that link. I am a bit disappointed that it looks like we won’t be getting another ice age. What with Mammoths on the horizon again. They’ll look even cooler in the appropriate setting.
Speaking of climate stuff, a mate did his doctorate at Linacre college and they still have the computer that ran the original Daisyworld simulation. I did geek out a bit (I’m quite the Lovelock fan).
@Victorious Parasol:
And even that’s not a guarantee. See the original attempts to film ‘The Man who Killed Don Quixote’, stopped by a flash flood and an injured star, as well as noise from the nearby military practice range. Though apparently there’s been an attempt at doing it again, almost twenty years later.
@brian
Some of the other places I visit, people have been complaining about a “ctrl-left” instead. (Because they want to control everything, you see.) Which has led to a number of jokes about keyboard politics…
@Jenora
That’s rich.
I read a page on that Larson character’s wiki and now would like a hug before I hide under the bed for a little while. As bad as you may imagine his platform to be, it’s worse.
Does smarty-pantsedness have no consistent punctuation? Or capitalization?
Also, you’ve made a death threat about a (supposed) lack of hair conditioner — maybe you’re going too far? Something you might want to think about.
Finally, your choice of Pantene Pro-V is peculiarly particular. Maybe you’ve had really good results from this conditioner. But I don’t think Pantene is going to ask you to be their spokestweeter. Not with your attitude.
@AsAboveSoBelow
The interwebz can be a scary place! Sending you cyber hugs.
The people complaining about this advertising are certainly exhibiting a lot of strength…
…but not much absorbency.
Actually I’d just point out to these gripers (if I was talking to them, that is), that there’s many kinds of strength people can have. The strength needed to lift a two-ton barbell over your head is a different kind of strength to what is needed to handle getting told by a doctor that you only have two-three months to live, if that.
At least, from what I can tell. Ymmv and all that.
Alan: turns out, Time did *not* have a global cooling cover in the 1970s! They had a short article in 1974, and Newsweek had one in 1975, but neither ever ran a cover. The Time Magazine cover I’ve seen is a photoshop of a cover that actually ran in 2007 … about global warming!
http://science.time.com/2013/06/06/sorry-a-time-magazine-cover-did-not-predict-a-coming-ice-age/
Lovelock is funny: in later years he went emeritus and started flip-flopping on whether global warming was going to be COMPLETE CATASTROPHE OHMIGOD ITS TOO LATE WERE DOOMED or ho-hum no big deal.
His Gaia stuff is a neat design for an ecosystem. It’s not related to how things actually work, but if you were to design a world, it would be a good stabilization system to set up.
@ numberobis
He’s been honest enough to admit that’s because he’s nearly 90 so he just isn’t bothered what happens so long as it’s more than 10 years away. 🙂
I love everything about Gaia Theory (yup, used that word). Not just the model but all the stuff leading up to it like Daisyworld.
I suppose you know it all started when he was on a team tasked with identifying methods for detecting life on Mars and they realised that they didn’t have a method for even identifying it on Earth? I like that they’re now looking at ways of detecting ‘Gaia’ atmospheres from spectral lines of extra solar planets.
The only thing to remember about Gaia theory is that it’s normative, not descriptive.
The Earth does not exhibit homeostasis, as evidenced by the mass extinctions, the snowball Earth and hothouse Earth periods, and the unstable equilibrium of glaciation/interglacial that our CO2 emissions are popping us out of.
Life has repeatedly nearly killed itself: First off, in the great oxygenation event, photosynthesis spewed out toxic oxygen that killed most anaerobic microbes except those in the deep soil and in certain deep sea areas, and burned up the methane in the atmosphere, so the Earth fell into a snowball Earth cycle.
Then, plants colonized the land in the late Devonian, which sped up geologic weathering (because the roots cracked the soil), and that drew down CO2, which led to another snowball Earth period.
Finally, in the biggest mass extinction (the P-T extinction), the Siberian Traps burned through coal deposits. That spiked CO2, which spiked the temperature, which reduced oxygen in the ocean, which led to anaerobic life thriving again in the ocean, even near the surface. That life emitted H2S rather than O2 as its waste product. Just as O2 is toxic to it, H2S is toxic to us.
Oh, post-finally, we’re currently causing a mass extinction event. So far it’s mostly been directly from hunting / harvesting, and through habitat destruction. But we’re also burning through coal deposits. That spikes CO2, which spikes the temperature, which reduces oxygen in the ocean…
@numerobis: I did not know we were in a desperate death match against anaerobic microbes! ~the more you know~
Rhuu: http://www3.geosc.psu.edu/~jlm80/Geosc497/Kump2005burp.pdf
In the deep ocean, sulphate-reducing bacteria prefer to eat oxygen, but they’ll eat sulphate and burp out H2S when they have no oxygen to eat. Normally, that H2S drifts up to the surface, reacts with O2 to form sulphate, and that’s the end of it.
Kump et al calculate that there’s a critical point where the H2S overwhelms the O2 and starts leaking out to the surface — and that this has happened.
When that happened, our ancient ancestors got “toxic levels of H2S in the atmosphere. Moreover, the ozone shield would have been destroyed, and methane levels would have risen to 100 ppm.”
If that happens again, no mere paper towel, no matter how butch, will save you.
@ numberobis & rhuu
I always like to imagine tiny little anaerobic bacteria back in the day with little placards protesting about oxygen pollution and all the other bacteria yelling “hippies!”
Thanks for all the info. I’m still (emotionally?) tied to Gaia Theory. I suppose I could argue that mass extinctions are no more an argument against the earth being in homeostasis than the occasional serious illness means we aren’t.
The best example someone gave me to differentiate steady state from equilibrium was that both a horse and a coffee table have four legs, but only one falls over when you shoot it.
@John:
Oh, don’t worry, not even hours ago I saw somebody whining about how SJWs ruined Horizon because white guys do bad things in it and men and women of color are the ones who fix things.
@dslucia
Yeh I hear the NWO intervened as soon as they caught wind that the game would sell like pancakes and rewrote everything at the last minute to plant feminazi propaganda. The devs are held hostage with surgically-implanted microbombs in their brains that will go off as soon as they even think about telling the truth of what happened to their game.
Or something. They can’t say “it’s not a real game” this time, and they can’t even argue that it’s not well-made. All their “objective” reasons to hate it for anything other than its politics just fall flat. The above paragraph is a parody but I’m pretty sure it’s not that far from the lengths they’ll go to solve that dissonance.
I can’t usually afford games at full price, but this time ? It was already worth every penny, but with their tears thrown into the bargain I’m starting to feel like maybe I shoulda paid more.
I just took at look at the ‘Horizon’ steam page. It looks like a standard 4X sci-fi game. What are the ‘bad’ things that the white characters do?
Numerobis:
Huh? I recall there were major ice ages in late Ordovician/early Silurian and late Carboniferous/early Permian. But late Devonian?
Alan:
I’d think it depends on how good a shot you get. A coffee table may not collapse from localized damage but if you manage to tip it over it also won’t get up again. Coffee tables are also easier to approach than horses.
@Fabe
You’re looking at the wrong game. The one they’re angry about is Horizon : Zero Dawn and it’s a Sony exclusive, hence why it didn’t show up on Steam.
Among the bad things that white dudes (and people who aren’t white dudes) in the game do : xenophobia, misogyny, fanaticism, classism, screwing the environment, etc. So huh, pretty much the same things that white dudes (and people who aren’t white dudes, but meh, mostly white dudes) in the real world do. And yes, they do it with the same smug superiority.
Guess they mad ’cause it’s otherwise unrealistic, since the giant robot dinosaurs are hunted by a woman who very clearly doesn’t know her place and doesn’t even wear a metal bikini.
lolol oh look it’s Stephan Malynomayonaise!
I’m surprised he can use Twitter with the word limit. Normally he cannot belch without it turning into a three hour rambling mess filled with tangents and incoherent nonsense.
From what I’m guessing of how little I’ve seen, destroying the planet?
I mean, the holograms in the beginning are all monocolored and I didn’t eat a good look at them so I’m not sure they’re all white people or whatever.
But also, how could you say hunting robot dinosaurs with a bow and arrow is a standard scifi game? Where’s all the cool ass dinosaur hunting games that are standard?
I ask because, like, I don’t know much about the story yet other thank people seem to really like it a lot, so all I’m going on is the fact you get to hunt robot triceratops and crap in it which is what sold me when I first heard about it several months back.
The fact that it has a story making white assholes mad is just the cherry on top if I’m honest.
@Jack
Slight spoilers ahead, be warned. I still kept the major things out of it though so it’s probably safe to read.
Yeah, if you have to pin the whole apocalypse on only one person, that person IS a white guy. But it’s really kinda blurry whether that guy should be seen as a long-dead villain or as the guy who footed the bill to make it possible to still have a world after the extinction event he inadvertently caused. Not exactly a redeeming quality but he’s not depicted as pure fucking evil.
Though, I bet they’re more angry that this same guy made all of his money thanks to a woman’s work, and then this same woman basically saved the world from the apocalypse he’d caused. ’cause everyone knows that fiction about a man who profits off a woman’s talent and then needs her to clean up his own mess has absolutely no basis in reality and is an unfair attack on men as a whole.
Spoilers end here.
To be fair I think they’re just angry about the main character herself. Basically she has a whooping 0% of the attributes that used to be the entire reasons to put female characters in any game whatsoever. So she’s literally worthless as a woman by gator standards. On top of that, she does a whole lot of standing up to men, even her friends/allies when they act like assholes. So I guess she’s a useless evil whore, on top of being an open feminazi.
Plus she don’t do boobplate.
I’m just wondering something, do non-MRA/not-alt-right people ever use the term”virtue signaling” other than while quoting alt-righties? Or is this another one of those things, like calling people “SJW”, that can be used to detect people who have something against people asking them not to be assholes.
I’ve never come across someone on the alt-right “virtue signaling” in a way that actually signals virtue.
If one frequently needs to use shorthand that means “person acting virtuous while not actually solving any problems”, what does that say about the one using the short version?
I don’t know that I have any real point here, sorry.