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Men! Beware of sneaky sexy ladies trying to HARVEST YOUR MALE GAZE!!!1!

Sneaky lady making innocent man her slave with the old handkerchief ploy

Fellas! Has this ever happened to you?

You’re at the grocery store, stocking up on Hot Pockets and Mountain Dew, when all of a sudden you discover a human female in the middle of the Frozen Food aisle with her shopping cart. You point out that she is blocking your access to the T.G.I.Friday’s Cream Cheese Poppers; she apologizes and moves out of your way.

Seems innocent enough, right? NOT SO FAST. This lady may have just HARVESTED YOUR MALE GAZE for her own nefarious purposes, using her ability to get your attention to “wield …power over you for narcissistic or material gain.”

According to Gynocentrism.com publisher Peter Wright, writing for Men’s Rights hate site A Voice for Men, this lady may have been using a SEEKRIT FEMALE TRICK known as THE BLOCKADE.

This happens when you are the target of a woman who wants to slow you down and make you absorb her presence. She will stand in the doorway, middle of the footpath, or in the shopping center aisle sometimes aided by a shopping trolley which she leaves strategically placed across the aisle.

Sneaky sneaky!

If done well, this forces an interaction: “Excuse me, I’ll just move your trolley so I can get past,” to which she replies “Oh, I’m so sorry,” while flashing her most attractive features at you – her favorite dress, beautifully shampoo’d hair, or that smile she was famed for in high school.

Damn these wily females and their habit of REGULARLY WASHING THEIR HAIR.

And this is but one of many sneaky male-gaze-harvesting techniques practiced by the modern female.

Men’s Rights Activists have long argued that women secretly control men using the hypnotic power of their sexy,sexy bodies. Warren Farrell, the intellectual godfather of the Men’s Rights movement, famously suggested in his 1993 book The Myth of Male Power that women in the workplace use “miniskirt power” and “cleavage power” to get the better of their male bosses.

When it came time a couple of years ago to pick a new picture for the latest edition of this book, Farrell couldn’t quite decide which sexy female body part he wanted to highlight, ultimately settling on an arty picture of a woman’s butt, apparently the fundamental source of female power over hapless lady-butt-loving men.

But as Wright makes clear, women have much more than butts in their, er, arsenal. Sneaky women can “harvest” the male gaze by:

Wearing brightly colored “hats, shawls and scarfs … with the wearers settling for nothing less than complete molestation from every set of eyes in the immediate vicinity.”

Using eye-catching accessories to draw male attention — from handbags to dogs and children. Yes, that’s right. You may have assumed that the woman you saw walking down the street this morning with a small child in tow was simply, you know, being a parent, but in reality she may have been trying to SWIPE YOUR MALE GAZE.

[C]hildren can be fawned over, or chastised, just as a target male walks by, where mother will say “Don’t let that nice man see you eating candy” or “Don’t get in the way of the nice man or you might get hurt.”

I’ll take “sentences never actually uttered by any human female for $400, Alex.”

Walking down the street without even so much as glancing in your direction. Yep, it may look like she doesn’t give two shits about you, but smart men know better! Especially if the woman in question HAS ARMS and is wearing CLOTHING and SHOES.

Strutting gorgeously, exuding self-sufficiency with an I-don’t-need-a-man look, the strutter has mastered the art of appearing disinterested in attention, while making a distracting physical display of swinging arms, loudly clopping heels, eye catching attire, and a chin-in-the-air look that begs a second glance from the target males.

But wait, you ask, if these strutting women aren’t looking at the men whose attention they want, how can she tell if she’s HARVESTED THEIR GAZES? It’s all done with mirrors. Or at least with shop windows. Wright claims that women tend to use the

Look At Me Strut … in central business district [sic] where she assiduously scans shopfront windows to capture all those reflected male gazes that her empowered strutting dreams of capturing. Her skill at using shopfront windows to look at both herself and the reflected faces of those gazing at her rises up to an artform that allows her to look sideways and yet not trip over when having little focus on the road ahead.

HOW DEVIOUS ARE THESE SNEAKY SIRENS OF CENTRAL BUSINESS DISTRICT?

Other male-gaze-harvesting tricks include: Talking loudly (with friends) talking loudly (to no one in particular), gesturing, and of course “bamboozaling with boobs.” Strangely, Wright omits the old “drop the handkerchief” ploy, which is totally a real thing that doesn’t just happen in old black and white comedies.

Stay safe out there, boys!

 

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Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
7 years ago

@Latte Cat
“Induce erection” is the worst passive ever.

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
7 years ago

Let’s hope men aren’t ever allowed in the military, if all it takes is a brightly colored scarf to distract them from their mission. The great Alpha Male, defeated by a scarf. Who would’ve believed it.

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
7 years ago

What I actually learned from this article is that Peter Wright regularly seeks eye contact in shopfront window reflections with unsuspecting women minding their own business.

Wright: A-ha! I caught that sneaky girl trying to catch me checking her out. BUSTED

Woman: If I pull out my phone and pretend to call my boyfriend, will this weird guy stop stalking me?

Paradoxical Intention - Resident Cheeseburger Slut

Once again, women only exist AT them, not on our own. We don’t exist for ourselves, and everything we do is somehow an assault on them and their poor widdle senses.

We wear clothes AT them. We do our shopping AT them. We fiddle with our hair AT them. We have butts AT them. We talk to our someone else AT them. We check our reflections AT them. We have dogs AT them.

They literally cannot conceive of a world where women exist outside of doing things AT them.

(Side note, do you ever look at a word long enough and it doesn’t feel like a word anymore? Me neither.)

On top of that, the idea that we actually exist when we’re not white, cishet, able bodied, and conventionally attractive is like telling an infant that the keys still exist when you’re not jingling them in front of their faces.

Nequam
Nequam
7 years ago

(Side note, do you ever look at a word long enough and it doesn’t feel like a word anymore? Me neither.)

This is actually A Thing: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Semantic_satiation

Lisa
Lisa
7 years ago

Why would I want a male gaze? What’s it good for?

Basically, the entire thing is a blaming game that takes all responsibility for their own actions and thoughts and puts it on women. It honestly sickens me that no matter what we do, they think it’s about them, ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS.

dashapants
dashapants
7 years ago

You’ve got questions, I’ve got answers!

@Ooglyboggles

Summer. Summer is prime male gaze harvesting season, though many enterprising ladies begin harvesting as early as April and do not stop until mid-November, when they move the harvester indoors.

@Hippodameia

Once male gaze is harvested, it is then used for feeding fantasies to raise self-esteem, which is then exhibited at county fairs in hopes of securing best in show ribbon.

Pro-tip: Another good way of harvesting the male gaze is by wearing a burka or a habit. Male gaze is automatically drawn to the sexy and devious siren within by a team of wild imaginings.

Citizen Justin
7 years ago

“[C]hildren can be fawned over, or chastised, just as a target male walks by, where mother will say “Don’t let that nice man see you eating candy” or “Don’t get in the way of the nice man or you might get hurt.”

The closest I’ve heard to that is when I’m doing security work and women in shops say to their misbehaving kids “You’d better behave, or I’ll set that security guard on you.”

Sporkey
Sporkey
7 years ago

*opens up crafting menu*

male gaze (4)
male tears (5)
intoxicating ladygoo (3)

Hmm…if I combine the gaze and goo, I get the potion of douchebaggery, +1 agility but -3 intelligence.

Gaze and tears, potion of entitlement, +5 endurance, -5 intelligence.

Tears and goo? Oh hey, potion of internet feminist…+3 strength, +2 agility and endurance, and fortify intelligence.

Alex Stallwitz
Alex Stallwitz
7 years ago

MRA’s seem to think all Women are evil Succubi who plot to suck men dry of money, their precious fluid and souls. Its the only way to describe their weird obessions

abars01
abars01
7 years ago

Jesus; are Elam, Farrell and AVFM still around? They’ve been so sidetracked in the age of Trump and the Alt-Right. Lord, what I wouldn’t give (what I suspect we all wouldn’t give) to be able to go back to the good old days…

gijoel
gijoel
7 years ago

I think he’s on to something here. Just this morning I had to walk past a young woman and her male physical trainer to get to my fruit-loops. Wait a minute… my god the gays are doing it too….!!11!!!!1

We’re through the looking glass here people.

The Real Cie
The Real Cie
7 years ago

I was probably just harvesting the TGI Friday’s Cream Cheese Poppers (I love those things), but, you know. I am a female, after all. I have to eat a male soul or two each week to keep up my evil womanly ways.

Podkayne Lives (Hairless Marsupial Gutter Nun)
Podkayne Lives (Hairless Marsupial Gutter Nun)
7 years ago

I think the nearest thing to that that I’ve ever said to my daughter is ‘honey, get out of that man’s way, he wants to get by’. But I may have been wearing a brightly colored scarf when I said it.

CleverForAGirl
CleverForAGirl
7 years ago

Do all women work to harvest the male gaze? Or do us brown, blue-haired-fatties get to keep being invisible?

Fishy Goat
Fishy Goat
7 years ago

@Ichthyic

This is why I use Apple’s new “Holographic Head”,

I’m so glad I wasn’t drinking anything when I read that. LOL!

Faerie Bard
Faerie Bard
7 years ago

Ugh. So we wear bright clothes and it’s for them. We look in the window, and it’s not to look at what’s in the window or to make sure some creeper isn’t following us, but to meet their gaze and steal their soul or something. If we go shopping and accidentally get in the way it’s for them, and if we appear confident and/or uninterested and/or completely oblivious to their presence, it is also for them. In short, we just passively exist to seduce THEM. These guys are so gross.

William Butthurt Yeats
William Butthurt Yeats
7 years ago

Back when the Taliban was in power in Afghanistan and we were hearing a lot about the brutal oppression of women there, I was honestly baffled as to what kind of mentality would produce a regime in which women were literally not allowed to be visible in public, or to anyone other than their immediate family. Now I understand.

I think the subtext here is not just that women have the nerve to be visible, but that they have the nerve to be visible to men who don’t own them. This guy is pissed about women whom he doesn’t own flaunting their existence.

guest
guest
7 years ago
Steampunked
Steampunked
7 years ago

I’m guessing that the harvest results in a liquid that can be useful in the garden for fertiliser, like season.

Kat
Kat
7 years ago

Laugh all you want, Mammotheers, but this MRA knows what he’s talking about. Okay, he’s got a detail or two wrong. But my gaze is harvested on the regular.

This happens when you are the target of a [cat] who wants to slow you down and make you [feed, pet, or otherwise serve her]. She will stand in the doorway, the middle of the footpath [assuming she’s an outdoor cat], or in the shopping center aisle sometimes aided by a shopping trolley which she leaves strategically placed across the aisle [only if your cat shops for groceries].

If done well, this forces an interaction: [“Fluffy, are you hungry?,]” to which she replies “[FEED ME!]” while [rubbing against your ankles].

Lunetta
Lunetta
7 years ago

They have taken the peacocking which men are doing deliberately and transposed it on to women who are just going about their business

Pie
Pie
7 years ago

@CleverForAGirl

Do all women work to harvest the male gaze? Or do us brown, blue-haired-fatties get to keep being invisible?

I’d make some comment about how the hypergamous buxom aryan superwomen have stolen all the attention for their own nefarious purposes, but I think the sad fact is that the set of people that the author considers women is a rather small subset of the set of people who consider themselves women. I imagine he files the difference into the category of awkward social problems he’d wish would just go away magically, like homeless people.

Kat
Kat
7 years ago

Harvesting the female gaze . . .

I’ve been sent an unsolicited photo of a penis. How do I respond?
Are you the unhappy owner of an unwanted dick pic? There are a few next steps for you to choose from, ranging from ridicule to revenge

https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2017/mar/03/sent-unsolicited-photo-penis-how-do-i-respond

lith
lith
7 years ago

@Rhuu:

Did they mention the sneaky technique of wearing earbuds and staring out the window? Or reading a book and not watching the people around?

In these modern times you’ve almost certainly been fitted with cameras, much like cars with reversing cameras to allow you to see all around you at all times.
I imagine most of them are hidden in your hair, jewellery, or a scarf or something.
This is self evident and requires no proof because women definitely do all the things they listed and that is the only way they could do so in those circumstances. QED really.