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creepy irony alert men who should not ever be with imaginary women ever men who should not ever be with women ever MGTOW misogyny

Fellas! Tiny hologram lady in a jar will be your girlfriend/slave for $2700

Every lonely misogynist’s dream girl? (Graphic adapted from Gatebox AI website; the “master now wanted” line is really what they have her saying.)

A Japanese company is taking the idea of a virtual assistant to a new level.

By which I mean that their new virtual assistant is a tiny holographic lady who lives in what looks like a very expensive coffee maker and wants you to be her boyfriend/master.

“Azuma,” according to her bio on the Gatebox AI website, is a 20 year-old anime fan who likes eating donuts, cooking fried eggs, and obeying every command from you that she can understand.

And don’t worry, fellas, there’s no way your tiny waifu can escape from her glass prison!

Now, obviously, there is nothing inherently wrong with virtual assistants, or holograms, or talking to inanimate objects in jars if that’s what floats your boat. And there are plenty of perfectly decent people who raise virtual pets and play dating sims.

But watch this ad for Azuma and tell me it doesn’t look like the opening sequence of some creepy dystopian horror film.

This little horror isn’t here quite yet. The Japanese version, selling for the equivalent of $2700, won’t ship for another year. Presumably an English language version will come out some time after that.

I guess the question I have is this: Will MGTOWs hail Azuma as a big step towards the eventual replacement of all real human women?

Or will they be annoyed by all her naggy texts?

I will follow up once they discover her.

EDIT: Well, that was quick. See what the MGTOWs think in my post here.

H/T — GamerGhazi

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Troubelle: Moonbeam Malcontent + Bard of the New Movement
Troubelle: Moonbeam Malcontent + Bard of the New Movement
4 years ago

Will it be enough, though?

Fallout Troy
4 years ago

Free her!

Iseult The Idle
Iseult The Idle
4 years ago

It’s like the sequel to AI, AI-yi-yi.

davidknewton
4 years ago

Ah… wow. I don’t know what to say about this. The idea sounds so sweet – just having a semi-intelligent little companion to interact with – but it needs to be taken much, much less seriously than it’s depicted here! Dystopian sci-fi film for sure 🙂

Snowberry
Snowberry
4 years ago

First thing which came to mind: What hath Eliza wrought?
Second thought: Most of them won’t think much of it because they can’t have sex with a hologram.

Stephen Lawt
Stephen Lawt
4 years ago

Just when I thought harem anime bullshit was the most problematic Japan could get they release this. I don’t know if I should be laughing at the ridiculous of it all or crying because there are plenty of MRA assholes who will view this as the herald of a new age

banned@4chan.org
banned@4chan.org
4 years ago

Yeah, that’s a moeblob alright.

SHE’S SHOWING OFF A WEDDING RING ON THE WEBSITE.

Hashtag Ravenclaw
Hashtag Ravenclaw
4 years ago

Second thought: Most of them won’t think much of it because they can’t have sex with a hologram.

Yep.

Even in their sexbot fantasies, MGTOWs and incels rarely plan to get themselves a sexbot. Rather, they dream that other men will go for sexbots, forcing women to lower their standards and date (read: have sex with) incels.

Misogynists don’t seek to devalue women in order to do away with them, but to have power over them.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
4 years ago

Okay, I understand the appeal, actually. Home AIs are already a thing, and this seems to be one of those but also with a good deal of personification. But then the angle of the ad appears to be the dude’s loneliness (I’m getting this from what he says at the end while falling asleep, and the fact that the girl-in-a-jar is the only person he ever talks to or who ever talks to him during the whole day) so it sorta makes sense, in the way that it supposedly provides something to help with that. Kinda like imaginary friends, ‘cept they also give you the weather and text you incessantly while at work.

Now, all that said… it’s so fucking creepy that it appears to just defeat the point.

@Troubelle

My sentiment exactly.

They’ll settle for nothing less than sexbots.

Or actual human women with the brain removed and replaced by a programmable AI, since the whole MGTOW mindset appears to be that women are supposed to be exactly that anyway.

ETA : ninja’d all the way down.

Euroguy
Euroguy
4 years ago

Who needs sexbots when there is so many gorgeous hookers at very reasonable prizes?
Who wants a 20 year old submissive sexbot when you can have a 30 year old nazi dominatrix?
So many pervert and fucked in the head people!

Troubelle: Moonbeam Malcontent + Bard of the New Movement
Troubelle: Moonbeam Malcontent + Bard of the New Movement
4 years ago

@Sinkable John

Can’t they learn to enjoy the company of a feline?

Illuminati Re-education Committee
Illuminati Re-education Committee
4 years ago

That was just sad and pathetic.

Fishy Goat
Fishy Goat
4 years ago

Not to mention – who’s going to make them sammiches? Or clean the house? *snerk*

lkeke35
lkeke35
4 years ago

I think I was creeped out by the constant texting. Its kinda cute but kinda sad too. I found myself wishing he had a pet. Or maybe he can’t have a pet and has social issues.

That said, we just bought an Alexa for our house. We haven’t hooked it up yet but my Mom (who is a senior citizen and homebound) seems really excited about it. We dont have any pets in the house and she has social anxieties, so maybe this virtual friend is a solution for that? Only without all the creepy text messaging.

Snowberry
Snowberry
4 years ago

Third thought: Gimme one with a cute catboy. He’s banned from texting me though.
Fourth thought: Would he be jealous of my boyfriend?
Fifth thought: Wish I could let him out of the jar. It seems awfully confining in there.
Sixth thought: Wait, am I seriously thinking about this?

The Last Unicorn
The Last Unicorn
4 years ago

Like some others have said, I honestly see the appeal in this.

But yeah, when I look at it from some other people’s perspectives… like how the MGTOWs will see this poor, caged anime girl… Well, hmm.

The Thousand Cock Stare
The Thousand Cock Stare
4 years ago

It does look like the set up for a horror story. I can see it now:

All is well until Lonely Guy meets a real, live woman and hits it off with her, but Azuma doesn’t want to share. She slowly starts sabotaging his life and relationships so she can have him all to herself…

CP Norris
CP Norris
4 years ago

That seems very much like the woman in the heating vent from Eraserhead.

dlouwe
dlouwe
4 years ago

I don’t really see the horror film trailer from the video itself, but I think that’s mostly because of the music. It’s definitely fodder for a cyber-horror mashup trailer.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
4 years ago

@Troubelle

I don’t know that it matters. I’m pretty sure cats can sense assholes. For example I’ve never seen a single cat react to a certain shitstain’s presence in any other way than running away as far as possible.

And I remember myself on a particularly shitty night years ago. Back then I lived in a town where I knew pretty much every stray and even most house cats. I often went for walks at night and stopped at all the usual places and they’d come out of their hiding spots and come to me. I dunno, I got a thing with cats, they don’t get startled even if they don’t know me yet, maybe I smell friendly ? Or, more probably, maybe I smell like cat, since House Beast won’t leave me or my clothes alone. I mean right now he’s on my lap purring like a fracking drill with half his body in my bathrobe and his head in my sleeve – I’m typing with one hand because I can’t move my arm.

Well that night I was in a pretty dark place and just angry and bitter at the whole world. The kind of mood where you just hate everything down to the very ground you tread because it’s clearly making every effort to hurt your bare feet and even the stars look like they’re spelling out a giant “fuck you” in the night sky.

Well that night, not a single one of my cat friends came out to see me. They actively avoided me, and I think they were actually scared. One of them, normally the friendliest, just hissed and spat at the sight of me then bolted when I tried to get closer like he was chased by the biggest dog in town.

Now, meektoes ? They’re brimming with pure distilled hate, it’s kind of their default setting by now. Pretty sure cats and possibly other furry friends avoid ’em like the plague. Makes sense too : if even dull dumb humans can sense how shitty they are and avoid them, then there’s no way a superior species will react any differently.

Abars01
Abars01
4 years ago

*sigh*. This is just what Japan needs right now, isn’t it. More men shunning relationships with real women in favor of ones with computer-simulations of anime characters. I’m sure the Japanese government is just thrilled.

Euroguy
Euroguy
4 years ago

The video is like a Japanese version of “The foreigner”, by Camus: the singleness, the void, the tram, the absurd, the rutine…

The big difference is, in “The foreigner” there is a sense of joy, in the so shiny North African summer, the Mediterranean, the meeting with the friends… the main character even has a girlfriend, goes to the movies, to the beach…

The Jap version is oppressive indeed. Existencialism 3.0

Handsome (Punkle Stan) Jack

Ah… wow. I don’t know what to say about this. The idea sounds so sweet – just having a semi-intelligent little companion to interact with

It seems really handy to have an AI with a personality to help people around the house, yeah. I mean having something that can start coffee pots or turn on lights when you’re almost home after dark is really handy but the texting seems a bit too much. Maybe if it’s for weather or traffic updates and stuff like that but not to, like, tell you to come home. Geesh.

But a semi-intelligent AI with a personality would be cool, especially if it’s customizable with a variety of personalities and models. Like, a cute dog to greet you when you come home or maybe an Alfred Pennyworth.

Holy shit, I would TOTALLY want an AI like this but with Alfred. I want all the snark.

The only thing is that would the interactions be varied enough? While a semi-intelligent AI is cool in concept, I’d imagine if it talked to you often, it’ll start to repeat itself unless it has programmed a variety of different phrases or can learn to talk differently. Do we have the technology to replicate an actual personality that won’t become stale after a while?

But also

AsAboveSoBelow
AsAboveSoBelow
4 years ago

@Thousand Cock Stare:
I once flipped through one of those “readers,” an easy-to-read book for adults who are learning to read English. It was about a man who builds a robot assistant, and it all goes wrong. The robot lures the man’s dog to its death with cookies, then locks the man in the bathroom, where he expires. It was horrifying and I burst into ugly, full-body, childlike sobs. The worst part was the illustrations. They showed the man cradling his dog’s lifeless body and weeping. I wish I could scrub it out of my mind. It really upset me.

Silly, but I’ve never told anyone that before.

AthVeg34F
AthVeg34F
4 years ago

This idea will no doubt be a it with men & boys who constantly claim to hate women… the irony of course is that they obsess over women at every chance. Obsess over what a sovereign female chooses to wear, how she chooses to ink/pierce herself, what job she chooses, what she eats, if she dares to get a cat, dares to not marry, dares to say bad words, etc.

I am so not even remotely sad for any guy who purchases an imitation female. He gets something to fall head over heels in love with, and he can’t hurt a real woman in the process.

Extra point for women getting slogged down by one less woman-hating guy.

Dawn Incognito
Dawn Incognito
4 years ago

Actually, her given name is “Hikari”. Azuma seems to be her family name. If they follow Japanese naming conventions in that magical alternate dimension. (Bet they do.)

And that ad made me so sad! That young man has no one but his AI girl-in-a-jar. I admit I busted out laughing to see him watching TV with her though.

The whole “Master” thing is pretty creepy. I wish there was a better way to word it. There was something vaguely appealing to me about the notion of a PDA with an avatar, but the virtual housewife aspect makes it icky at a basic level. They should release various personalities! (I’ll take Bird Person. 😉 )

Snowberry
Snowberry
4 years ago

Just in case anyone cares, and also because I’m a little bored, the overly-literal translation of the sign is “Master Recruitment Inside”.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
4 years ago

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought the incessant texting was definitely too much.

I mean I already hate constant texting from people made of flesh, and those tend to have limits to how fast they can type and send.

@Jack

But a semi-intelligent AI with a personality would be cool, especially if it’s customizable with a variety of personalities and models. Like, a cute dog to greet you when you come home or maybe an Alfred Pennyworth.

Holy shit, I would TOTALLY want an AI like this but with Alfred. I want all the snark.

YES ! It is my secret dream to become filthy rich just so I can hire a snarky butler.

While a semi-intelligent AI is cool in concept, I’d imagine if it talked to you often, it’ll start to repeat itself unless it has programmed a variety of different phrases or can learn to talk differently.

All I can think about is that I was once an adventurer like you, but then I got an arrow in the knee. Admittedly it’s not a great example of what real possibilities are afforded by modern AIs. But still.

Handsome (Punkle Stan) Jack

Also, funnily, everyone makes Giffany their waifu (and probably a lot of porn) even though her schtick is, you know, wanting to isolate and control the person she’s obsessed with at the moment? To the point she’d kill them for wanting to date someone else?

http://i.imgur.com/0jjNN9i.gif

But she is a anime high schooler in a sailor uniform so what can you expect.

All I can think about is that I was once an adventurer like you, but then I got an arrow in the knee.

Let me guess, someone stole your sweetroll?

(EDIT: Oh, wait, a Handsome Jack AI would be fun. Like, from Tales from the Borderlands and only if he knew he was a hologram and hated it.)

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
4 years ago

I half-wish I could rewatch Cherry 2000.

GreySkye
GreySkye
4 years ago

As long as I can get one with a virtual Varric, I am down with this tech.

Of course, the MGTOW dudes are already having frothing fantasies in the comments of that vid. Venture there at your own risk… of laughing so hard you fall off your chair.

RosieLa
RosieLa
4 years ago

This AI strikes me as being the logical extension of my deep, deep, deep childhood desire of catching Tinkerbell and keeping her in a big mason jar with fireflies.

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
4 years ago

I –

I feel like I should comment on this or something :s

weirwoodtreehugger: chief manatee

Sounds like a Black Mirror episode.

Oh, and can we make shut up, Eurocreep the new shut up, Woody? It appears this trouser detritus is determined to spread his boner opinions in every thread now.

Snowberry
Snowberry
4 years ago

Of course, the MGTOW dudes are already having frothing fantasies in the comments of that vid.

Among other things, apparently this is a plot by teh jooooz to exterminate the Japanese people.

There’s also a bunch of “This is good because 3-D Women are shit” type comments, which seems weird because aren’t holograms technically 3-D?

QuantumInc
QuantumInc
4 years ago

@banned Perhaps that is why she is in a jar, in case the moeblob spills.

Of course you have the realize that the 2D version has existed for years if not decades in Japan. Note how most of the ad is the guy at work; the consensus in Japan is that nobody has time for dating because they’re too busy at work. Of course that doesn’t explain all the married men who also buy virtual girlfriends. Unfortunately the awful truth is that virtual girlfriends are far easier and reliable than flesh and blood girlfriends. There is none of that messy trying to understand a person who is just as complicated as your own self; let alone the nasty realization that there is more to manhood that a good job. You never have to worry that your girlfriend will be moody or unable to help you because of her own problems. She will always be able to cheer you up. Of course the “cheer you up” algorithm was engineered by a team of people who you will never meet, but don’t worry they spent millions studying men similar to you and most of them watch the same “harem” anime TV you do, so that is kinda like understanding you…

Handsome (Punkle Stan) Jack

There’s also a bunch of “This is good because 3-D Women are shit” type comments, which seems weird because aren’t holograms technically 3-D?

Well, technically, holograms now aren’t 3D because they’re a projection and there’s mirrors involved and stuff and you have to look at them a certain way for them to seem 3D, as far as I know of holograms.

Like, the jar shape of the object is needed to make her appear 3D because she’s being projected on the glass at a variety of angles. Also, you can see she’s flat when the camera is pointing down at the guy in bed because it’s not designed to be able to see the top of her head.

D. D. Webb
4 years ago

I honestly have my suspicions that any extant AI is actually that interactive. Marketing always lies. No exceptions.

I do see the appeal of this, though. Real people are difficult, exhausting, and prone to backstabbing. If I had the option of a programmable companion who lived in a jar, I dunno for sure that I’d turn it down, and I’m just kinda jaded. For someone with genuine social anxiety or a related disorder, something like this could be a real godsend.

Of course, nothing exists divorced from context, and I bet much of the Western (and probably Japanese for that matter) market wouldn’t so much be people who have issues with people as guys who have issues with women. There are definite misogynistic overtones to what amounts to a pet girl who lives in a jar. The social ramifications are potentially nasty.

Jenora Feuer
Jenora Feuer
4 years ago

@CP Norris:

That seems very much like the woman in the heating vent from Eraserhead.

*twitch*

(Yes, I’ve seen the movie.)

@Dawn Incognito:

Actually, her given name is “Hikari”. Azuma seems to be her family name.

Which, considering that ‘hikari’ means ‘light’, makes perfect sense for a hologram.

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
4 years ago

It’s mai waifu in a box. I can see the appeal, and to be perfectly honest if a relative gifted one to me I wouldn’t mind owning one. But the master talk needs some alternative, that’s just veering straight into creeper territory.

At the same time I can’t help but laugh at the anti semetic conspiracists who’d rather blame their pet boogeyman than admit to systemic flaws in the Japanese government.

@Handsome Jack
Some people have a yandere fetish.

@D. D. Webb
Hopefully it’ll be more functional than those overhyped rc drones “THAT YOU CAN PROGRAM tm”. It would be a waste of 2700 if they weren’t able to work out the frustrating aspects that come with technology like this.

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
4 years ago

I would totally get one of these. It seems to imply that you can put in more than one kind of character in there, so there are probably downloadable kits and voice packs.

(I adore Tinkerbell also :o)

I’m also of the opinion that this little thing is likely more sophisticated than most AI’s that are seen. Someone above commented on Skyrim’s AI as a warning, which – well. Skyrim’s AI is storied. They were planning on making a very deep GOAP model (GOAP is used in The Sims, with its stack of needs and various need fulfillment sources), but time and money ran out, so they ended up putting in a much more basic pseudo-scripted model instead.

(An aside, GOAP is a very interesting model on its own, and combined with a probabilistic environmental sensing system you can make some real magic happen. Very powerful juju)

Tinkerbell in a Jar is a very different sort of beast. In video games, AI is usually one of the first things to be thrown out when money or time gets tight. It’s complicated and usually doesn’t really result in better sales, provided that a certain minimum bar of behaviour is met. This thing? It’s basically All AI. Further, it looks like it’s build with Siri-like communication handling. That implies convolutional nets or some equivalent. So, it’ll learn your habits and behaviours, and begin to predict them. I imagine it’ll text you if you deviate from that behaviour, which is what it seemed like was happening in the video clip.

Honestly? This’ll sell to the elderly really well in Japan. Something that can keep tabs on Granddad and will recognize if he didn’t make it to the Pachinko parlor like usual, and isn’t responding to the phone? That’s worth gold to people worried about their aging parents. Singles who don’t have time for a relationship as well, but, well. That’s a different thing.

Neat technology. As for the MRAs? I’m sure they are super eager about it,. Their own tiny woman that they keep in a jar. I feel so terrible thinking about how that CN would learn to behave :C Oh, tiny digital tinkerbell, be strong.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

This is kind of neat, but I’d prefer a version that doesn’t act like it’s my romantic partner and only texts me to reply back to something I’ve sent it. Like if I sent, “hey, can you turn off the coffee maker?” it could send me a reply back, but none of this texting me random crap. It’s an AI, not a person.

Bina
4 years ago

I suppose it beats the child-size realistic sex doll that’s also out there, but ugh. Ugh. UGH.

Handsome (Punkle Stan) Jack

Some people have a yandere fetish.

You see, I could understand that, but she’s not portrayed that way in fanworks. (A majority of the stuff I’ve seen has her more, let’s say, submissive than in the show for some reason. /s)

But it always happens to villains who are attractive. They tone down their evilness and even completely rewrite their character because they’re hot. You know, Draco In Leather Pants syndrome.

So it’s not a yandere fetish, at least for the majority of people. Also she’s a schoolgirl so that’s gross.

I suppose it beats the child-size realistic sex doll that’s also out there, but ugh. Ugh. UGH.

Child-size as in child-like or…you know what, I have an idea and I wish to unknow that information.

Lygeia
Lygeia
4 years ago

Holy crap! That is the saddest thing I have ever seen.

Our corporate overlords want us to have celibate lives with no families, just holograms and for us to like it.

Troubelle: Moonbeam Malcontent + Bard of the New Movement
Troubelle: Moonbeam Malcontent + Bard of the New Movement
4 years ago

@Handsome Jack

I’m very late due to moving from house to house, but I should have pounced on the .GIFfany comparison much sooner. Still, you did a good! (I’ve not seen many fan works with her, save for a cartoon involving Calhoun from Wreck-It Ralph getting awful defensive of Fix-It Felix Jr. with .GIFfany around.)

And what I would do for a holo-AI of Handsome Jack (the character not you obviously) that I could just shoot the shit with.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
4 years ago

but none of this texting me random crap

The crap doesn’t look random. There’s a theme to it, a very needy and clingy theme.

Handsome (Punkle Stan) Jack

I’m very late due to moving from house to house, but I should have pounced on the .GIFfany comparison much sooner. Still, you did a good!

I had actually just posted my comment when I remembered Giffany so I had, like, 4 minutes to find a clip of her being creepy, which is hard because it seems no one wants to see her as creepy.

Like, because I like using Gravity Falls gifs, I, of course, sought her out for reactions and you really have to dig deep for what I’d consider her more iconic moment of the show (which is the gif above). Mostly it’s her doing her ‘gains a sparkle in her eye’ and, uh, swimsuit pics…which…like, when you look SPECIFICALLY for GIFS of a villain and you find more positive and sexy fan art than even screenshots from the show, you’ve got a problem.

The crap doesn’t look random. There’s a theme to it, a very needy and clingy theme.

There’s just something inherently more creepy about a program that’s clingy. Like, this is real life, it’s not gonna be actually jealous or worried, the user just wants it to be clingy. They want her that way with no consequences. Maybe the AI will get sad if you leave her alone or turn her off but she’s still a mindless program made to be submissive and dependent on you while simultaneously having to fulfil all the needs of yours she can and you can just ignore and neglect her and she’ll be happy if you use her again.

It’s just…creepy. Like, however programmed it made it for someone who wants to be babied but in control and it’s just…nah.

dlouwe
dlouwe
4 years ago

Our corporate overlords want us to have celibate lives with no families, just holograms and for us to like it.

While I get the sentiment, from what I’ve read it’s kind of reversed in Japan – corporations there specifically do want their employees to get married, as it’s what’s “expected,” and they will take efforts to set up single employees. The relatively recent trend of “herbivore men” (who I imagine are a primary target of this product) is seen by some as a rejection of that corporate lifestyle.

A. Noyd
A. Noyd
4 years ago

Looks like a new a way to milk every last yen out of lonely, women-hating nerds by way of DLC skins, behavior sets, and tie-ins to light novels/games/anime. Any possible real-world utility would be secondary to that.

Although, if one of the add-ons was a homage to the song When I Get Home My Wife Always Pretends to Be Dead, that would be hilarious. (Boring vid with good English subs: here. Awesome vid with no English subs: here.)

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