The 4th quarter 2016 We’ve Got a Bigger Problem Now WHTM pledge drive continues! If you appreciate the blog, please donate what you can! THANKS!
One of the many tragedies of Donald Trump’s electoral college victory is that it has given Dilbert creator and Dunning-Kruger poster boy Scott Adams an even more inflated belief in his own personal brilliance.
Adams, you see, was one of the first to predict Trump’s political success, and now he feels the need to share every dumb thought he has about the man with the world.
Adams’ latest Trump brainstorm: Maybe Russia did us all a yuuuge favor by subverting our democracy to boot Trump, did you ever think of that?
“One way to look at the recent election in the United States is that Russia (allegedly) subverted our democratic process to ensure that Trump would win,” Adams wrote on his blog yesterday.
Another way to look at the election is that Russia did a big favor for the American public by preventing Clinton from becoming president.
DID HE JUST BLOW YOUR MIND??!!1
So why would it be so great for Russia to have secretly conspired to knock Hillary out of the race? Because that silly woman actually thought of the country that secretly subverted our democracy to boost the chances of an easily manipulable geopolitical naif as some sort of enemy!
Clinton saw Russia as an adversary. I confess my ignorance on this topic – and maybe you can set me straight in the comments – because I can’t think of any reason Russia and the United States should be considered natural enemies. Both countries want to defeat ISIS. Both countries want peace and prosperity. Neither claims ownership of any of the other’s territory. I see the prospect of good relations with Russia as a way to make some money for both countries and defeat ISIS too. That doesn’t seem so bad.
I mean, sure, I guess I can see that. I mean, Russia is an autocratic kleptocracy run by a guy whose enemies have a strange way of finding themselves dead, and Putin kind of wants to take over neighboring countries and undermine NATO and subvert democracy all over Europe by supporting far-right parties, but, hey, maybe we’ve been too quick to see these things as bad things!
Oh, sure, Adams acknowledges,
If Russia did interfere with our elections in a meaningful way, obviously that is a hole we need to plug. But this is an unusual situation because their alleged actions look more like the work of a sneaky ally than an enemy. The likely outcome of their alleged hacking is that we’ll have better relations with a major superpower and a better chance of defeating ISIS.
THANKS, SNEAKY ALLY!
“One trick of persuasion that I have sometimes used involves treating an adversary like a friend until they turn into a friend,” Adams goes on to note.
I’ve never seen it done on a country-to-country basis, but it works great in person. If you tell someone you are on their side, and you act that way, it is hard for them to keep you on the enemy list. I don’t know if this method of persuasion works for countries, but this is the perfect place to test it.
Huh. I seem to remember a country called Russia doing that with a country called Germany. How did that work out for them?
Oh, right. But hey, when has history ever repeated itself? Never, probably!
Russia and the United States have more interests in common than in conflict. In this particular case, Trump can change the frame from adversary to ally if he chooses to do so. And that would probably have the effect of making all parties act that way.
So, hey, Putin, keep messing with our democracy! Obviously you’ve got our best interests at heart! Some dude who does a comic says so!
This is indistinguishable from being an actual friend. It’s sad that Adams needs to view a normal friendship as “a trick”. It’s even sadder that he thinks the idea of “be nice to people and they might be nice to you” is some sort of video game cheat that only masters of persuasion know of. Sigh. Life as a conservative must be ridiculously empty and bleak.
@IP
Life as a liberal isn’t looking too keen right now either.
@rugbyyogi & Jack
Or, “If we lived in a hypothetical alternate universe where Hillary and China (*dogwhistledogwhistledogwhistle*) committed treason, a non-zero number of hypothetical liberals might hypothetically be okay with it, therefore I’m okay with Trump and Russia committing treason for real. Because that’s not a fallacy at all.”
Courtesy of David Wong. Yes, that David Wong.
This man is too damn old not to know the history of Russia/Soviet Union. He should be well aware of the Cold War in any case and the duplicity of Putin in his own political arena. As a Political Scientist, this makes me ill. As an American, I realize it is an indictment of our educational system. It needs an overhaul if people do not understand the nuances of international relations. What an idiot!
Somehow I suspect that if one were to ask Adams point-blank if he’s saying that people he disagrees with should lose the right to participate in their democracy, he would scoff and say that the questioner has reading comprehension issues.
Well, no, they’re not natural enemies, Scott, like rabbits and coyotes.
@Euroguy
Best one I’ve heard in a while. You just made my day.
Do these capitalists have no grasp of how the system they worship even works?
Sure, Adams. Putin is well known for his selfless generosity and committment to the common good. I’m sure it was just a friendly gesture of goodwill. He’s practically a saint, really. No cause for alarm.
http://dl9fvu4r30qs1.cloudfront.net/f2/b7/ddb515df48a4ae55ee9354c65ed0/no-country-tommy-lee-jones.jpg
Color me not surprised. Couple of those Cracked writers like to do “but BOTH sides are skeevy” sort of shit.
But also what the fuck.
(Another test, ignore this.)
EDIT: Okay, David, what’s up is either the quotes or the word(s) Punkle Stan triggering the moderation thing.
I remember a time when I found Dilbert clever and witty.
Somehow, though, the more I learn about the artist, the less clever Dilbert seems. Scott Adams is just a sexist idiot who has no idea how anything works (except for the fact that somehow, a lot of companies end up hiring really incompetent managers instead of promoting the actually-best workers).
States don’t act like people. Because they aren’t human. They are an emergent property, like anthill intelligence. Adams is committing a massive fallacy of composition, but good luck pointing that out to him.
It’s axiomatic in international relations that “countries don’t have friends; they only have interests”.
Heck, the UK generally gets on ok with the US, Canada, Australia & New Zealand but we have to have a formal treaty not to spy on each other. Israel and the US are pretty close allies but Israel keeps getting caught out conducting operations against the US.
So it may well be that a Trump administration could align interests with Russia; especially with Tillerson as intermediary. I wouldn’t be surprised for example if Trump allows Russia a free rein in Syria and sells that to the American public as ‘taking on ISIS’. In return Russia will no doubt make some suitably flattering comments about Trump and his great statesmanship.
But that detente will last only as long as the US allows Russia to do anything it wants. Whatever the public pronuncments, Russia will still regard the US as a rival and a potential threat and set policy behind the scenes on that basis. If a situation arises where US and Russian interests no longer coincide then any pretence at ‘friendship’ will evaporate faster than the Molotov/Ribbontrop pact.
Who knew that the guy who made the dull Dilbert comics turned out to be an ass-kisser for Trump & the Kremlin? What a gutless, mealy-mouthed, sleazy little prick.
Is David Wong the one who writes Nice Guy screeds about how men are sexist because the pretty popular girls wouldn’t touch his dick in high school? Or is that a different Cracked writer. Shit, maybe it’s multiple writers.
….just, no.
The level of history fail and foreign policy fail just….
Um, let’s see…. in America, you have democracy. In Soviet Russia, democracy has you! Or something.
@WWTH
That’s him. He’s been waving the “Wait and see! Economic anxiety! BENGHAZEMAILS!!!” flag like every other Male Feminist™ BernieBro tosspot and seems to be getting stupider by the day.
I hate the sad boner excuse for misogyny so much. I didn’t get any in high school either and I was a girl. Get the fuck over it.
@wierwood:
Wong thinks that 80s movies brainwashed a generation of young men into believing it’s the natural order of things for a dream girl to fall in love with a nice nerdy guy – especially if the guy tricks or coerces her into making out with him – only for those young men to feel betrayed when reality proves otherwise. He doesn’t agree with the whole “Nice Guy” worldview, he just poses an explanation for why that view exists.
@MrsObedMarsh
Revenge of the Nerds springs to mind, although it went farther than making out…
@Euroguy
Oh hey, if you’re okay then I’m okay. Thanks for sharing.
Always great to talk to a fascist who chooses his words very carefully.
So you choose your words carefully in order to mislead. Got it.
And now you’re incoherent.
Yeah, yeah, it’s an empowered Eva Braun.
Does not compute. Is this a reference to pedophilic priests?
Yay. This comment didn’t go into moderation. Using an older nym does the trick, maybe?
@Belladonna
You’ve been having trouble, too? I figured out the “Punkle Stan” part of my name was screwing things up. I think you happened to change your name around the same time I added mine so maybe that has something to do with it?
@Kat, that’s twice in two days I’ve gotten to experience your snark at Euroguy. It is really the greatest thing. I almost want to have him keep commenting, so that you can keep embarrassing him.
@Jack
Yes! Every comment of mine for several days has been going into moderation. I wrote David about it. When I saw your post under “Handsome Jack” that you were experimenting, I thought maybe it was related and decided to try posting without the “Toxic Hag.”
Anyway, it worked, so thank you.
I’m wondering if there’s some kind of sock puppet filter going into overdrive or something.
-Today is my last day of recovery. Song production should begin again tomorrow.-
-Also, @Handsome Jack: there has been much ham in my life.-