The 4th quarter 2016 We’ve Got a Bigger Problem Now WHTM pledge drive continues! If you like, then MONEY pls? SERIOUS THANKS!
The internet’s angry dude army tends to get pretty worked up when women “invade” what some dudes consider sacred male spaces — like video games, and Star Wars, and comedic films about ghosts.
Now these same dudes are furious at comedian Amy Schumer for invading yet another sacrosanct male space: the world of Barbie.
Wait, what did I just write?
Ok, so the world of Barbie is traditionally associated with young girls, not angry adult men, but it turns out that a bunch of these adult men apparently feel that they should get the final say in any Barbie-related decisions that might possibly have some sort of impact on, I guess, their weird sexual fantasies about Barbie dolls?
See, they’re mad about reports that Schumer may play the title role in an upcoming live-action film based on the legendary Barbie doll because, even though the film isn’t aimed at them at all, the very thought that a woman with opinions they don’t like, and who they think is a fatty, might play Barbie kind of makes their little heads explode.
And so, on Reddit’s The_Donald, where a good number of these angry dudes tend to congregate, the Trump-loving, Schumer-hating regulars have decided to make America great again by Googlebombing an unflattering pic of Amy Schumer to the top of the search results for the phrase “fat Barbie.”
They haven’t succeeded in this task, at least not yet, though the post advocating the Googlebomb has managed to garner more than 3500 upvotes so far.
The_Donald’s critiques of the Emmy-award winning comedian, actress, writer and producer are, naturally, small masterpieces of careful reasoning.
I have curated a selection of some of the finest comments for you all below.
![FightTheUniverse 37 points 9 hours ago RIP Amy Schumer's f**kability. permalinkembedsaveparentreportgive goldreply [–]ZornsLemmon 55 points 8 hours ago She's always had a dog face and her chin is annoying as f**k. permalinkembedsaveparentreportgive goldreply [–]Tragically_American 16 points 2 hours ago SHE'S A CHUBBY CHEEKED WHORE!!](https://i0.wp.com/www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/amy1.png?ssl=1)
What a terrible miscarriage of cinematic justice!!1! In the REAL WORLD Amy Schumer would never ever ever ever be able to date a hunky dude oh wait.
Just a reminder: when then-candidate Donald Trump did his “Ask Me Anything” appearance on Reddit, he bypassed the regular Ask Me Anything subreddit and went straight to The_Donald.
Clearly, these are his peeps.
@beth
I don’t doubt they have. Maybe some of them even label themselves as such. Thing is though, they inevitably consider it a shameful fetish, like being attracted to older women, or women of colour or trans* folk, and they’d really like them to all be stuffed back into the closet like a load of sex toys, and not interfere with the perfect aryan wonderland that they say they want to live in. Sex toys don’t speak up in public, or act in films, or have opinions, or pop up in non-sex-related parts of your life, because that would be embarassing, right?
Yeah, having a preference for a certain body type is not a fetish. I’m suuuper tired of the idea that some preferences are Normal TM and others are Weird TM or Kinky TM. But mostly it’s very offensive to the women I happen to be attracted to. Being fat doesn’t make you a peculiar special interest when it comes to sex or relationships.
@dlouwe:
http://www.writingwinters.com/wp-content/uploads/allthinking.jpg
Infuriating to hear trash-talk about such fine edibles as horseradish, red cabbage, cauliflower, etc, from people who probably EAT SHRIMP.
Every time Amy Schumer says “Muh Vagina” I seriously lose my shit.
Girls Rule. Women Are Funny. Get Over It.
Apparently some people have this general sensitivity to cruciferaean bitterness. Some guinea pigs have it too, or possibly all guinea pigs.
Years ago when we had two piggies, they’d eagerly eat bitter-ish plants from carrot and lettuce families. But when I offered them chinese cabbage (one of my personal favorites), it was a sniff and “nope”.
johnchapel (from Ohio) says this:
And yet you, johnchapel from Ohio, cannot get laid.
Which is weird, because you (johnchapel from Ohio) have a lot of charm.
@ artic ape
#notallguineapigs
(Sorry, couldn’t resist)
@Kat
It is like negging, applied to a whole class of people. Lets build up an entire culture telling them they’re worthless and unattractive, and then they’ll be totally pliable and DTF if we give them the slightest bit of positive attention!
Also, uh, “in reality”, she seems to be doing okay for herself.
@Pie
In their vivid fantasies, this shit totally works.
@Pie
This is something that’s been often said here before, but these guys seem to be living in a completely different reality of their own.
Michael Moore Just Predicted The Electoral College Will Keep Trump From White House
http://occupydemocrats.com/2016/12/08/michael-moore-just-predicted-electoral-college-will-keep-trump-white-house/
Never have I rooted harder for electors to be faithless!
If memory serves, Michael Moore accurately called the election for Trump.
Let’s hope that the man is a prophet.
(I mean, let’s hope that he’s also right about the electoral college.)
Very long tldr re more inclusive Barbies:
Around February this year, there was a little bit of a buzz around a young Nigerian woman’s Instagram where she recreated and photographed her own outfits and those of other Muslim fashionistas on her Barbie.
http://www.cosmopolitan.com/style-beauty/news/a53214/hijarbie-the-hijab-wearing-barbie/
She hoped to turn this into a commercial enterprise.
You will be astonished to hear that there was a backlash against it. One typically outraged person set up a Facebook page called “Ban the Hijab Barbie”, calling for this heinous activity to cease.
The well reasoned argument was that the founder, as a freckly white US redhead, had no problem either identifying with Barbie or distinguishing herself from Barbie, so [steps elided from chain of reasoning] stop dressing your doll in things you would wear yourself, brown person!!!!!11!!
It was a small page, probably intended only as a hate group for like minded friends and family – some original likers of the page posted Islamophobic bile so egregious that Facebook eventually took their comments down and banned them from FB.
But it was created as a public page, and caught a few people’s eye. The owner didn’t seem to know how to suppress public comments. A gentle trolling campaign followed.
People posted their gratitude at having been informed about this cool new doll, and asked when and where people could buy it.
People posted links with the latest information on the cool new doll.
People asked BTH Barbie why, if Barbie’s universality transcends nationality, pigmentation, and body type, it can’t continue to transcend those things while wearing a hijab.
People posted links and pictures of various non Aryan and more body realistic actual Mattel Barbie dolls.
Eventually, the page disappeared. Maybe Mattel saw it and didn’t want their brand even tangentially associated with a hate group. Maybe the page administrator learnt how to unpublish. Maybe the page administrator got banned under their main identity. Maybe FaceBook made a decision. Sort order: Probability: descending.
I wish that page was still up, because it was a little treasure trove of incidental information about the Barbie brand’s efforts to acknowledge and address problems with their brand, posted by people who would possibly usually be distrustful of the brand.
Exotification via national costumes of long ago or far away lands is less often the only context where a non-white Barbie is seen.
There is more than one Barbie body type now – 4 or 5 now I think.
There are bald Barbies that help kids on chemo feel less like their situation is most importantly about their hair loss and how its implications makes other people feel.
Oh, and Handsome Jack, I don’t know if this AFro Barbie is mass production or limited edition, but she is at least Mattel Official
https://www.instagram.com/p/BMUe_dhjTnB/
Pie,
A big part of their hatred of fat women, single moms and women over 25 is that these men think of us as so beneath them that they believe we should want their attention and time.They want to believe non-models will fall all over ourselves for a chance to be with them. We don’t and that contradicts and offends them. There is a reason they want women to be forced into monogamous relationships with men to survive. It’s the only way they’d ever get a woman to stay with them. They’re enraged that they can’t even “settle” for a woman they deem unworthy because we don’t want them anywhere near us.
I believe the primary function of horseradish is to ruin exactly half of the hot mustards that exist, so you can never be sure if you’re getting spicy mustard or some horrible bitter monstrosity.
Shorter Trumpkins: “How am I supposed to fit a whole fat Barbie up my ass? WHY ARE U SJWS DENYING MAH ORGASMS?”
@Valkyrine
I think so. I think there might be another name for it, but I forget what it is. What I do remember about it (if the thing I’m thinking about is indeed the same thing) sounds like an STD. Arugula, is what it’s called, but I could be wrong that this is the horribly bitter red shit that one finds in salads.
@Scout
Arugula is green.
I think you folks are thinking of radicchio, which is distinct from red cabbage, and which I actually really enjoy.
Just quoting this because it needs to be quoted.
In other news, the MRAcists are pissed off about Star Wars yet again. This time, because they’ve finally realised that the Empire is a Nazi expy and that it’s supposed to be evil.
Not the Empire in Rogue One, the Empire in the original trilogy. From 40 years ago. Fucking fake geek boys.
(And for bonus “MRAcists live a black hole, part #918239213”: They think the original trilogy is anti-Trump propaganda. Yup.)
Arugula is called Rocket in yurp. It is a bit bitter, but it is also fairly green so there’s no reason you’d mistake it for red cabbage. Red cabbage is indeed purple, and isn’t particularly bitter from recollection, but maybe I’m just not sensitive to the appropriate chemicals.
@Viscaria
I was wondering about that, but isn’t it supposed to be eaten cooked, rather than raw in a salad? It is certainly very bitter. I don’t like any sort of chicory, and haven’t ever found a way to prepare it that makes it palatable for me. On the other hand, I’ve no problem with rocket or brussel sprouts and stuff. Human flavour responses are pretty weird.
*For a bonus. I shouldn’t add stuff with 20 seconds left on the edit timer.
Matt,
Wtf?