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Reddit’s Trump army is furious Amy Schumer is invading the sacred male space of … Barbie

Amy Schumer: Ruining Trump fans’ memories of Barbie

The 4th quarter 2016 We’ve Got a Bigger Problem Now WHTM pledge drive continues! If you like, then MONEY pls? SERIOUS THANKS! 

The internet’s angry dude army tends to get pretty worked up when women “invade” what some dudes consider sacred male spaces — like video games, and Star Wars, and comedic films about ghosts.

Now these same dudes are furious at comedian Amy Schumer for invading yet another sacrosanct male space: the world of Barbie.

Wait, what did I just write?

Ok, so the world of Barbie is traditionally associated with young girls, not angry adult men, but it turns out that a bunch of these adult men apparently feel that they should get the final say in any Barbie-related decisions that might possibly have some sort of impact on, I guess, their weird sexual fantasies about Barbie dolls?

See, they’re mad about reports that Schumer may play the title role in an upcoming live-action film based on the legendary Barbie doll because, even though the film isn’t aimed at them at all, the very thought that a woman with opinions they don’t like, and who they think is a fatty, might play Barbie kind of makes their little heads explode.

And so, on Reddit’s The_Donald, where a good number of these angry dudes tend to congregate, the Trump-loving, Schumer-hating regulars have decided to make America great again by Googlebombing an unflattering pic of Amy Schumer to the top of the search results for the phrase “fat Barbie.”

They haven’t succeeded in this task, at least not yet, though the post advocating the Googlebomb has managed to garner more than 3500 upvotes so far.

The_Donald’s critiques of the Emmy-award winning comedian, actress, writer and producer are, naturally, small masterpieces of careful reasoning.

I have curated a selection of some of the finest comments for you all below.

FightTheUniverse 37 points 9 hours ago RIP Amy Schumer's f**kability. permalinkembedsaveparentreportgive goldreply [–]ZornsLemmon 55 points 8 hours ago She's always had a dog face and her chin is annoying as f**k. permalinkembedsaveparentreportgive goldreply [–]Tragically_American 16 points 2 hours ago SHE'S A CHUBBY CHEEKED WHORE!!

TheSaltyFlipper 8 points 6 hours ago It was a calculated move. Most of American is now overweight. Instead of striving to be her best she let herself go in order to be a closer fit to the "avergage American". Sad!

enemyofIslam 1 point 3 hours ago Not even worth the hatef**k anymore how sad

johnchapelOH 3 points 2 hours ago  If anyone saw trainwreck, her character was a promiscous girl who was really picky with men, slept with 8s and higher, and treated them like sexual objects, kicking them out of the house after SHE'S cum. Absolute f**king make-believe. Never before in history has a girl who looks like Amy f**king Schumer EVER been like that. In reality, fat weird looking girls like her f**king GUSH when a 6 even says "Excuse me" to walk past them.

What a terrible miscarriage of cinematic justice!!1! In the REAL WORLD Amy Schumer would never ever ever ever be able to date a hunky dude oh wait.

Just a reminder: when then-candidate Donald Trump did his “Ask Me Anything” appearance on Reddit, he bypassed the regular Ask Me Anything subreddit and went straight to The_Donald.

Clearly, these are his peeps.

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Pie
Pie
3 years ago

@beth

Haven’t they ever heard of chubby chasers?

I don’t doubt they have. Maybe some of them even label themselves as such. Thing is though, they inevitably consider it a shameful fetish, like being attracted to older women, or women of colour or trans* folk, and they’d really like them to all be stuffed back into the closet like a load of sex toys, and not interfere with the perfect aryan wonderland that they say they want to live in. Sex toys don’t speak up in public, or act in films, or have opinions, or pop up in non-sex-related parts of your life, because that would be embarassing, right?

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

Yeah, having a preference for a certain body type is not a fetish. I’m suuuper tired of the idea that some preferences are Normal TM and others are Weird TM or Kinky TM. But mostly it’s very offensive to the women I happen to be attracted to. Being fat doesn’t make you a peculiar special interest when it comes to sex or relationships.

EJ (The Orphic Lizard)

@dlouwe:

Horseradish is an intentional and objectively incorrect decision.

http://www.writingwinters.com/wp-content/uploads/allthinking.jpg

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

Infuriating to hear trash-talk about such fine edibles as horseradish, red cabbage, cauliflower, etc, from people who probably EAT SHRIMP.

Eric Cartman
Eric Cartman
3 years ago

Every time Amy Schumer says “Muh Vagina” I seriously lose my shit.
Girls Rule. Women Are Funny. Get Over It.

Arctic Ape
Arctic Ape
3 years ago

Also, I’m not a fan of cruciferous veggies in general, because they tend to be bitter

Apparently some people have this general sensitivity to cruciferaean bitterness. Some guinea pigs have it too, or possibly all guinea pigs.

Years ago when we had two piggies, they’d eagerly eat bitter-ish plants from carrot and lettuce families. But when I offered them chinese cabbage (one of my personal favorites), it was a sniff and “nope”.

Kat
Kat
3 years ago

johnchapel (from Ohio) says this:

In reality, fat weird looking girls like her fxxking GUSH when a 6 even says excuse me to walk past them.

And yet you, johnchapel from Ohio, cannot get laid.

Which is weird, because you (johnchapel from Ohio) have a lot of charm.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
3 years ago

@ artic ape

Some guinea pigs have it too, or possibly all guinea pigs.

#notallguineapigs

(Sorry, couldn’t resist)

Pie
Pie
3 years ago

@Kat

johnchapel (from Ohio) says this:

In reality, fat weird looking girls like her fxxking GUSH when a 6 even says excuse me to walk past them.

It is like negging, applied to a whole class of people. Lets build up an entire culture telling them they’re worthless and unattractive, and then they’ll be totally pliable and DTF if we give them the slightest bit of positive attention!

Also, uh, “in reality”, she seems to be doing okay for herself.

Kat
Kat
3 years ago

@Pie

It is like negging, applied to a whole class of people. Lets build up an entire culture telling them they’re worthless and unattractive, and then they’ll be totally pliable and DTF if we give them the slightest bit of positive attention!

In their vivid fantasies, this shit totally works.

Valkyrine
Valkyrine
3 years ago

@Pie
This is something that’s been often said here before, but these guys seem to be living in a completely different reality of their own.

Kat
Kat
3 years ago

Michael Moore Just Predicted The Electoral College Will Keep Trump From White House

http://occupydemocrats.com/2016/12/08/michael-moore-just-predicted-electoral-college-will-keep-trump-white-house/

Never have I rooted harder for electors to be faithless!

EJ (The Orphic Lizard)

If memory serves, Michael Moore accurately called the election for Trump.

Let’s hope that the man is a prophet.

EJ (The Orphic Lizard)

(I mean, let’s hope that he’s also right about the electoral college.)

Croquembouche of patriarchy
Croquembouche of patriarchy
3 years ago

Very long tldr re more inclusive Barbies:

Around February this year, there was a little bit of a buzz around a young Nigerian woman’s Instagram where she recreated and photographed her own outfits and those of other Muslim fashionistas on her Barbie.
http://www.cosmopolitan.com/style-beauty/news/a53214/hijarbie-the-hijab-wearing-barbie/
She hoped to turn this into a commercial enterprise.

You will be astonished to hear that there was a backlash against it. One typically outraged person set up a Facebook page called “Ban the Hijab Barbie”, calling for this heinous activity to cease.

The well reasoned argument was that the founder, as a freckly white US redhead, had no problem either identifying with Barbie or distinguishing herself from Barbie, so [steps elided from chain of reasoning] stop dressing your doll in things you would wear yourself, brown person!!!!!11!!

It was a small page, probably intended only as a hate group for like minded friends and family – some original likers of the page posted Islamophobic bile so egregious that Facebook eventually took their comments down and banned them from FB.

But it was created as a public page, and caught a few people’s eye. The owner didn’t seem to know how to suppress public comments. A gentle trolling campaign followed.

People posted their gratitude at having been informed about this cool new doll, and asked when and where people could buy it.

People posted links with the latest information on the cool new doll.

People asked BTH Barbie why, if Barbie’s universality transcends nationality, pigmentation, and body type, it can’t continue to transcend those things while wearing a hijab.

People posted links and pictures of various non Aryan and more body realistic actual Mattel Barbie dolls.

Eventually, the page disappeared. Maybe Mattel saw it and didn’t want their brand even tangentially associated with a hate group. Maybe the page administrator learnt how to unpublish. Maybe the page administrator got banned under their main identity. Maybe FaceBook made a decision. Sort order: Probability: descending.

I wish that page was still up, because it was a little treasure trove of incidental information about the Barbie brand’s efforts to acknowledge and address problems with their brand, posted by people who would possibly usually be distrustful of the brand.

Exotification via national costumes of long ago or far away lands is less often the only context where a non-white Barbie is seen.

There is more than one Barbie body type now – 4 or 5 now I think.

There are bald Barbies that help kids on chemo feel less like their situation is most importantly about their hair loss and how its implications makes other people feel.

Oh, and Handsome Jack, I don’t know if this AFro Barbie is mass production or limited edition, but she is at least Mattel Official
https://www.instagram.com/p/BMUe_dhjTnB/

Lea
Lea
3 years ago

Pie,
A big part of their hatred of fat women, single moms and women over 25 is that these men think of us as so beneath them that they believe we should want their attention and time.They want to believe non-models will fall all over ourselves for a chance to be with them. We don’t and that contradicts and offends them. There is a reason they want women to be forced into monogamous relationships with men to survive. It’s the only way they’d ever get a woman to stay with them. They’re enraged that they can’t even “settle” for a woman they deem unworthy because we don’t want them anywhere near us.

Viscaria
Viscaria
3 years ago

I believe the primary function of horseradish is to ruin exactly half of the hot mustards that exist, so you can never be sure if you’re getting spicy mustard or some horrible bitter monstrosity.

Matt
Matt
3 years ago

Shorter Trumpkins: “How am I supposed to fit a whole fat Barbie up my ass? WHY ARE U SJWS DENYING MAH ORGASMS?”

Scout
Scout
3 years ago

@Valkyrine

is red cabbage that purple stuff you sometimes find in salads?

I think so. I think there might be another name for it, but I forget what it is. What I do remember about it (if the thing I’m thinking about is indeed the same thing) sounds like an STD. Arugula, is what it’s called, but I could be wrong that this is the horribly bitter red shit that one finds in salads.

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
3 years ago

@Scout

Arugula is green.

Viscaria
Viscaria
3 years ago

I think you folks are thinking of radicchio, which is distinct from red cabbage, and which I actually really enjoy.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
3 years ago

Yeah, having a preference for a certain body type is not a fetish. I’m suuuper tired of the idea that some preferences are Normal TM and others are Weird TM or Kinky TM. But mostly it’s very offensive to the women I happen to be attracted to. Being fat doesn’t make you a peculiar special interest when it comes to sex or relationships.

Just quoting this because it needs to be quoted.

In other news, the MRAcists are pissed off about Star Wars yet again. This time, because they’ve finally realised that the Empire is a Nazi expy and that it’s supposed to be evil.

Not the Empire in Rogue One, the Empire in the original trilogy. From 40 years ago. Fucking fake geek boys.

(And for bonus “MRAcists live a black hole, part #918239213”: They think the original trilogy is anti-Trump propaganda. Yup.)

Pie
Pie
3 years ago

Arugula is called Rocket in yurp. It is a bit bitter, but it is also fairly green so there’s no reason you’d mistake it for red cabbage. Red cabbage is indeed purple, and isn’t particularly bitter from recollection, but maybe I’m just not sensitive to the appropriate chemicals.

@Viscaria

I think you folks are thinking of radicchio, which is distinct from red cabbage, and which I actually really enjoy.

I was wondering about that, but isn’t it supposed to be eaten cooked, rather than raw in a salad? It is certainly very bitter. I don’t like any sort of chicory, and haven’t ever found a way to prepare it that makes it palatable for me. On the other hand, I’ve no problem with rocket or brussel sprouts and stuff. Human flavour responses are pretty weird.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
3 years ago

*For a bonus. I shouldn’t add stuff with 20 seconds left on the edit timer.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

Matt,

Wtf?

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

They’ve identified at least one gene linked with the ability to taste bitterness in cruciferous vegetables (broccoli, Brussels sprouts, etc.). I learned about it from 23 and Me, at the same time I learned I do not have that variant of the gene. Before that, I never knew anyone experienced a bitter flavor from those veggies and suddenly the reason why I’ve always loved Brussels sprouts became clear. It’s always had a nice flavor to me. Even if I eat it raw it’s never bitter, actually it’s a bit spicy like radish that way. But since radish is in the same family maybe other people find that bitter, too?

Radicchio and endive, on the other hand, are horrible, bitter things. Why anyone eats them is beyond me. You might as well sprinkle aspirin pills on your salad; it would taste better. I used to every few years find a recipe from a favorite chef and think maybe this recipe has the proper preparation method so I won’t hate it, but they never did and so I’ve given up on them.

Christina Nordlander
Christina Nordlander
3 years ago

@Scented Fucking Hard Chairs:

Wow, turning against the original Star Wars trilogy is sure to make them popular with the internet at large.

On the upside, now I have another reason to hate the alt-right!

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
3 years ago

@Matt, ew.

Bina
3 years ago

@Scout:

As a matter of fact I think they’d probably have nasty things to say about anyone who got that part, just because that’s what they do.

Pretty much. They’re mad every time there’s a movie starring a woman, or aimed at women, rather than just using women as an accessory/trophy/fap-fodder in a movie aimed at men. The whole idea of women-as-leading-characters just saps and impurifies their precious bodily fluids!

Snowberry
Snowberry
3 years ago

Hmm. I can taste the bitterness in crucifers, but it doesn’t bother me. On the other hand, I can taste the bitterness in chocolate, but it does bother me.

The list of things which I don’t like is pretty short and seemingly lolrandom.

Dalillama, Effort Chicken
Dalillama, Effort Chicken
3 years ago

@EJ(TOL)

Let’s hope that the man is a prophet.

<excessive pedantry> Seer, or perhaps soothsayer. A prophet, technically, is someone who speaks on behalf of a god. This may include predictions of the future, but it is not necessary </excessive pedantry>

Lea
Lea
3 years ago

I like most bitter green things. I can’t handle cilantro though. Tastes like soap. But bitter greens are good to me the way really hoppy beer is good. I like some stinky cheese too.

epitome of incomprehensibility

Vegetables! I like most of them that I’ve tried (that is, in my grown-up stage of life – as a kid I was pickier). Cauliflower and carrots are probably my favourites. Raw and crunchy is nice. Or roasted with olive oil and a bit of rosemary and/or savoury. On the other hand, I don’t care for horseradish or very sour things.

Now, Barbies… I don’t think @Matt set out to offend, but was joking about the idea that a Barbie could be a “sex toy” in a literal way. Anyway, it made me laugh.

But that’s the thing (and here I begin my rant against the MRA types). People on this blog like and dislike different things, and mostly we don’t get angry about matters of taste. Thinking that your taste should dictate everything that people should do and be? That’s called entitlement, and it gets very, very silly as well as unfair.

Kat
Kat
3 years ago

@epitome of incomprehensibility

People on this blog like and dislike different things, and mostly we don’t get angry about matters of taste. Thinking that your taste should dictate everything that people should do and be? That’s called entitlement, and it gets very, very silly as well as unfair.

Pardon me, but I am enraged by the disrespect shown on this thread to the innocently spicy horseradish.

It’s delicious and works wonders to clear the sinuses. Anyone who disagrees with me is a poopyhead in the extreme.

Horseradish: What’s it ever done to you (besides give you a jolt of I’m awake!).

epitome of incomprehensibility

@Kat – Oh noes! I need to defend my honour! My carrots challenge your horseradish to a battle!

…Hm, not sure how that would work. And in terms of clearing sinuses, yours would clearly win. Okay, I surrender 😛

Kat
Kat
3 years ago

@epitome of incomprehensibility
It’s impossible to get a good vendetta going on WHTM.

Damn it!

Lynette
Lynette
3 years ago

I wish I looked as good in photos as Amy Schumacher does in that “unflattering” photo

kupo
kupo
3 years ago

@Kat

Horseradish: What’s it ever done to you (besides give you a jolt of I’m awake!).

Well, sometimes they mix it with other stuff to lessen the heat level, in which case it’s greatly disappointed me. Though I blame the chef, rather than the horseradish in those cases.

Kat
Kat
3 years ago

@kupo

Horseradish: What’s it ever done to you (besides give you a jolt of I’m awake!).

Well, sometimes they mix it with other stuff to lessen the heat level, in which case it’s greatly disappointed me. Though I blame the chef, rather than the horseradish in those cases.

This does not rise to the level of vendetta.

Or even mild disagreement.