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These Kellogg’s Breakfast Cereal Commercials Kill Fascists

Kellogg's Corn Flakes: Sweetened with Breitbart's tears
Kellogg’s Corn Flakes: Sweetened with Breitbart’s tears

On Tuesday, cereal and snack giant Kellogg’s announced it was pulling ads from Breitbart on the grounds that Breitbart is a giant racist shithole of a site and who would want to be associated with that? Granted, the Kellogg’s people were a little more diplomatic in making this point, saying simply that Breitbart isn’t really “aligned with our values as a company.”

Breitbart responded, naturally, by calling for a boycott of Kellogg’s, declaring that the company’s unwillingness to have their ads run next to stories about how birth control makes women “unattractive and crazy” somehow

represent[s] an escalation in the war by leftist companies … against conservative customers whose values propelled Donald Trump into the White House. …

Indeed, the move appears to be one more example of an out-of-touch corporation embracing false left-wing narratives used to cynically smear the hard working Americans that populate this nation’s heartland.

Breitbart’s Editor-in-Chief Alexander Marlow went on to declare, apparently with a straight face, that

Boycotting Breitbart News for presenting mainstream American ideas is an act of discrimination and intense prejudice. If you serve Kellogg’s products to your family, you are serving up bigotry at your breakfast table.

Naturally we here at We Hunted the Mammoth stand with Kellogg’s even though we’re lactose intolerant and don’t eat cereal any more but hey, we do sometimes eat other Kellogg’s products like Pringles and Cheez-its.

You can do your part in this very important cultural war by watching the following commercials for several different Kellogg’s cereals, including one that no longer exists, and also Pop Tarts.

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hottotrotsky
hottotrotsky
4 years ago

Breitbart had better be ready to host my ads for ungendered spermicidal lubricant in Lenin, Marx and Hegel shaped collectable hand blown glass bottles, OR I CRY BIGOTRY. Man, I even planned a special Walter Benjamin Christmas mistletoe fresh edition, but my freeze peaches are all being stolen!!1!

I haven’t made rice krispies treats in years, but as @Bina mentioned above, the delicious weirdness of beibg a socialist jabbing fascists by supporting capitalists is a perfect gestalt for 2k16.

Handsome "Punkle Stan" Jack

Meh. Advertisers suddenly realize that Breitbart is a rag. They couldn’t have done that earlier, like, years ago when everyone else figured it out ?

True.

I don’t think the people who handle the advertisements normally care that much where the ads go, as long as people are likely to see them. And in the case of online ad banners, they usually don’t even know which sites they’re being displayed on.

Some websites still have spaces to buy ads and stuff but there are services like Google Ad which uses your search history to advertise stuff you’d like people can use to get revenue instead. (Very useful for sites with a wide arrange of viewership.) Unless Breitbart uses a Google Ad-like service, Kellogg would have had to go to them to ask for ad space. Which they probably didn’t. Or else they need to have some talks inside.

So, like, the question is, why is possibly Google Ads still giving Breitbart service?

Cynical Optimist
Cynical Optimist
4 years ago

@kupo, Axecalibur

Thanks for the tip and the last time an actual moderate ran.

Weird (yeah, it CAN happen here) Eddie
Weird (yeah, it CAN happen here) Eddie
4 years ago

@ Cynical

How do I explain to people why the protests are happening?

If you want to get into it… “We elected a monster, and people who have been and are going to be victimized by the monster aren’t willing to go away and die quietly”

That’s the gist of the protests, I don’t know how that’s going to set in your case, but I’ve given up trying to sugar-coat it.

There seems to be two types of people who voted for him; 1) those who liked his bigotry, supported it and thought it was funny and 2) those who voted for a phantasm of him that they made up in their heads, and was what they wanted him to be (and who thought his bigotry was funny). Anyone who supports this monster has to either ignore everything he has said and done or support it… or be absolutely catatonic.

Ooglyboggles
4 years ago

@ Cynical Optimist
You could show them the constitution and explain that this is well within their constitutional rights to protest against a despot, you could also reference multiple links that David has compiled in an article a while back.

Snowberry
Snowberry
4 years ago

when was the last time the GOP ran a truly moderate candidate?

1956?

Does Bush senior count? He was a moderate relative to all of the other Repub presidential candidates since at least Nixon.

Dan Hoan
4 years ago

While, this makes me glad I bought poptarts this morning for breakfast….what the hell has Kellogs been doing advertising here in the first place?

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
4 years ago

@Snowberry
Post southern strategy Republicans don’t count as ‘moderate’ for me. I mean, what does ‘moderate’ even mean? For my purposes tho, 1968-now is inadmissible, Goldwater started this whole mess, and Nixon was the same guy in 60 as he was in 68. That leaves Eisenhower *shrug*

bearpelt
bearpelt
4 years ago

…Kellogg’s was actually started up by an arch-conservative health fanatic who believed that a bland but nourishing cereal-based diet would kill the sex drive…

Bina that is simply amazing. I did not know that and my mind is blown now.

I think that Kellogg is also the reason that so many men are circumcised, actually. He believed it would make them less likely to… well I’m at work so YOU KNOW.

@Rhuu Wait what???? THAT’S why so many Xtians in America circumcise???

@Eyes on the Right IS THAT A WESTIE IN YOUR ICON? DO YOU HAVE A WESTIE?? My family loves westies omg

@AW MAH FREEZE PEACH

hottotrotsky
hottotrotsky
4 years ago

@bearpelt

Widepread circumsicsion also goes back to 19th century racist garbage recapitulation theory!

The idea was that stages of child development mirrored ‘stages’ of civilization, where a four year old boy is the equivalent to a ‘primitive’ tribal society (especially Native American ofc) and so on, and that it was important to train boys toward a ‘civilized’ controlled sexuality and masculinity by visually and functionally differentiating their genitals from those of ‘primitive’ men. Presumably coming of age circumsicsion ceremonies were either unknown or not factored into this peak white trash.

Hexum7
Hexum7
4 years ago

Is that Judy Garland learning French?

That would explain a lot.

Otrame
Otrame
4 years ago

feartheminotaur,

That was brilliant.

I understand not liking nested comments because it’s hard to come back to a conversation after being away for a while and not knowing what you’ve already read. But on the other hand, nested comments mean I could tell you that I thought your piece was brilliant and that comment would show up right next to yours. Or you could have numbered comments so I could say: feartheminotaur @34 That was brilliant, and people who saw my comment but not yours could find it easily.

Everyone I know knows how easily I lose track of what the original conversation was, and now you do too.

No seriously, that was brilliant.

Weird (yeah, it CAN happen here) Eddie
Weird (yeah, it CAN happen here) Eddie
4 years ago

@ Hexum

Is that Judy Garland learning French?

M. Google is not cooperating on this, though I found (unreliable) info it’s from 1962… and it sure LOOKS like her.

PeeVee the (Noice) Sarcastic
PeeVee the (Noice) Sarcastic
4 years ago

Well, Judy would have been 40 in 1962, so…

Sea Wolf
Sea Wolf
4 years ago

Firstly: I now want to buy one of the huuuge boxes of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes and eat a big bowl of it with a generous sprinkling of sugar.

Secondly: I agree with the sentiments on bigots calling others bigoted for not putting up with their bigotry. It’s so aggravating.

Eyes on the Right
4 years ago

@bearpelt

Yes it is, and yes I do. She’s turning 14 this December.

Speak Centurion
Speak Centurion
4 years ago

Breitbart News certainly puts forward some controversy-stirring ideas but I can’t say I have ever seen anything racist or bigoted on their website.

AlphaBetaSoup
AlphaBetaSoup
4 years ago

@ Bina,

The book is even better! (Road to Wellville). T. Coragghessan Boyle is my favorite contemporary writer (since Kurt Vonnegut died)

AsAboveSoBelow
AsAboveSoBelow
4 years ago

@Alan Robertshaw:

“This is the one used on the Irvine and Mallory Everest expedition”

They had “meat lozenges,” too, which sound like bouillon cubes (are they?). Mallory still had a tin in his pocket when his body was found in 1999. It wasn’t hypoglycemia that killed Mallory and Irvine, so there’s that, I guess.

Ooglyboggles
4 years ago

@Speak Centurion
comment image

Go be ignorant
Somewhere else washout roman,
you are not welcome.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

@ asabovesobelow

They had “meat lozenges,” too

As far as I’m aware (so take this with a barrow load of salt) they were like tablets of dried beef and gelatin. They started out as ‘invalid food’. You could eat them or brew up ‘beef tea’. (My grandma swore by beef tea as a panacea). They were issued to soldiers in WW1 so that’s probably where the expedition got the idea.

What amazes me about that expedition is how they were dressed. Pretty much what you’d wear for a country walk. Less than 10mm of clothing. However tests show it was actually quite effective, so the old advice about dressing in layers seems to pan out.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@Speak Centurion

Breitbart News certainly puts forward some controversy-stirring ideas but I can’t say I have ever seen anything racist or bigoted on their website.

Oh, aren’t you adorable.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
4 years ago

@Speak Nonsense

That pun pretty much covers it

Mish of the Catlady Ascendancy
Mish of the Catlady Ascendancy
4 years ago

@feartheminotaur,
@Otrame,

Seconding Otrame’s compliments, and wishes for nesting comments (sometimes!).

Re Kellogg’s and circumcision, I did some research on this area ages ago and it’s fascinating. For instance, the whole clean white masculinity thing (late 19th – early 20th C) was big in a number of western countries, but male circumcision rates have always been much higher in the US (I’m speaking of non-religious circumcision, obv.)

Also ‘interesting’ that alt-righters on social media are berating Kelloggs for promoting circumcision – now that the company has pulled its advertising from Breitbart.

Brony, Social Justice Cenobite

@Mish
So circumcision matters when it’s convenient again? I wonder about how that got started. Sometimes I wonder if it amounted to a “see? I have to cut mine so…” but I don’t know that history well. I’m probably mixing my view of the past with the manipulation of the present here. My view of this stuff is pretty dismal.

Brony, Social Justice Cenobite

Oops. I meant to copy and past your whole name Mish of the Catlady Ascendancy.

Robert Walker-Smith
Robert Walker-Smith
4 years ago

I’ve said it on Facebook, I’ll say it here.
More people are buying what Kellogg’s is selling than there are people buying what Breitbart’s is selling.

Let the market decide!

Mish of the Catlady Ascendancy
Mish of the Catlady Ascendancy
4 years ago

@Brony, Social Justice Cenobite,

‘Mish’ by itself is just fine 🙂

My view of this stuff is pretty dismal.

If you feel like elaborating/clarifying, I’d be interested.

fwiw, I think that male circumcision on infants/children is just wrong on any level you care to consider. But apparently that can’t be right: yesterday I saw this on Twitter (via TakeDownMRAs) – a video on circumcision that places all blame on mothers and feminists 😐
There is also a naked banana ironing a banana peel and grinning.

Brony, Social Justice Cenobite

@Mish
As a circumcised male person I often pay attention to mentions of circumcision. I think it’s a way of punching a symbolic hole in the culture having to do with dicks (literal and metaphorical). It just spikes at you in the social space. But I really don’t suffer from it in any way. It just kind of is. It does not mean that there are not male people that do suffer because of circumcision, I just try to separate the social from the physical or medical effects. I’m sure people have physically suffered, that’s just not what social modification of genitalia seems to be about in the ways accepted by the religious traditions I experience as an an American (conservative background), and the people that type loud that criticize things having to do with women, female people and feminism.

I tend to notice the context in which people talk about circumcision. How they use it and when they use it are big ones. I virtually always see circumcision brought up specifically in response to criticism of “men” as it relates to a “male-man” historical view. Not just in response to FGM either. The “equivalence warriors” that like to functionally suppress talk of FGM are the easiest to spot form from my social perspective. A really fucked up set likes to use circumcision as a conceptual shield against rape in a functional sense (dressed in irrational “arguments” based on some sort of terror).

It’s a thing where the concept does matter because personal autonomy matters. But the physical and social realities are more about control of what we do in really messed up ways. It makes me cynical about some of our psychological make-up in a meta sense. I choose to believe this sort of instinct can be turned into a good thing in time, the current use of it tends to make me feel ill.

That video is typical of how I see circumcision USED. The intent is bandies about but that does not change the logical outcome of what the people do and their effect on people.

Bina
4 years ago

@Robert Walker-Smith:

I’ve said it on Facebook, I’ll say it here.
More people are buying what Kellogg’s is selling than there are people buying what Breitbart’s is selling.

Let the market decide!

Right? And at least Kellogg’s will provide you with energy and nutriment to keep your brain working. Bitefart? The opposite.

Shadowplay
Shadowplay
4 years ago

@Weird Eddie

There seems to be two types of people who voted for him; 1) those who liked his bigotry, supported it and thought it was funny and 2) those who voted for a phantasm of him that they made up in their heads, and was what they wanted him to be (and who thought his bigotry was funny).

How about the third type (who are the majority)?

The ones who disliked Trump but detested Clinton enough to let that over-ride Trumps disgusting behavior.

Saw an interesting thing today which got me thinking:

“If you are afraid of a particular person as President, consider that maybe the Presidency has too much power.”

Dalillama, Effort Chicken
Dalillama, Effort Chicken
4 years ago

@Shadowplay

Take your bullshit and fuck off. ‘B b but Hillary!” is not a fucking excuse for supporting fascism.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

The ones who disliked Trump but detested Clinton enough to let that over-ride Trumps disgusting behavior.

comment image

TheLurker
TheLurker
4 years ago

David, I can’t believe you didn’t post the Kellogg’s ad with the Monkees!

Also, I will definitely be buying some corn flakes or something bc I love serving bigotry against whiny white men at the breakfast table

EJ (The Orphic Lizard)

@Shadowplay:

A) Yes, the Presidency has too much power. This is fairly noncontroversial, I think.

The reason why the Presidency has too much power is because every other branch of American government, from cities to states to Congress (especially Congress) is non-functional. The Executive has had to become the branch which act like adults and clean up everyone else’s mess.

You want to fix the Presidency? Start by fixing the rest of government.

B) What Dalillama said.

mildlymagnificent
mildlymagnificent
4 years ago

A chance to display a recent Kellogg’s ad which I’ve always liked. I presume Sultana Bran is the same product as the US Raisin Bran.

HawkAtreides, on the floor again with a head full of rain
HawkAtreides, on the floor again with a head full of rain
4 years ago

@EJ

One of the problems with Congress specifically is that the myth of Parliamentary Supremacy persists among far too many people both in and out of power, as if the Constitution created The Legislature and those other two subservient branches. Until we completely get rid of the idea that the legislature is the sole seat of governmental power, people who buy into the myth are going to support Congressional obstructionism of and meddling in the powers and duties of the Executive, such as withholding funds for aspects of the ACA and then holding hearings chastising Obama for not implementing those aspects, or bills telling Executive agencies the exact rules they must implement and the exact parameters of those rules with no devolution for future refinement.

So yeah, of course the President is going to have to go nuclear every now and again when Congress is pretending that it has all the power and the Executive’s sole domain is doing everything the legislature says. It’s just so surreal that the perceived power imbalance is because the branch that seems to have all the power is being obstructed so often by the branch that pretends to possess it all themselves, and that the “fix” is to actually get people to understand that Congress should be claiming less power for itself.

Christina Nordlander
Christina Nordlander
4 years ago

@Eyes on the Right: “Special KKK”, perfect.

Good for them. I hope every company with a modicum of integrity pull their ads from Breitbart.

Ghost Robot
Ghost Robot
4 years ago

Breitbart is essentially a cult, end of story.

Mish of the Catlady Ascendancy
Mish of the Catlady Ascendancy
4 years ago

@Brony, Social Justice Cenobite,

Thanks for that. There are a couple of points in your post that I need to mull over some more, but I see what you’re saying re the context: how and why the issue gets raised.

I was inspired to go and read your blog, and so there went Mish’s Friday afternoon. You have given me much food for thought.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

I don’t think the presidency is too powerful. I think the Supreme Court is. The reason a Republican administration is so scary is that they put in justices and this email justices are there for decades. Recovering from 4 years of bad policy isn’t so scary. A basically omnipotent right wing court that lasts for half an adult’s lifespan is pants shittingly terrifying.

The court is why I pretty much despise anyone who enabled Trump in the White House. They literally wrecked the country for decades.

Kevin
Kevin
4 years ago

I have to say boycotting can work. It weaned the Daily Mail off supporting the Austrian would – be artist.

Secular circumcision’s social status varies with era and culture, When my father was born in the 1930’s most UK male babies were routinely circumcised as this was touted as ‘more hygienic’ – by doctors who stood to make more money by charging for the procedure.

Where Mrs Kevin (She Who Must be Obeyed) comes from in SE Asia, men are routinely circumcised and often considered insufficiently ‘macho’ if they are not.

AsAboveSoBelow
AsAboveSoBelow
4 years ago

I enjoyed a big crispy bowl o’ anti-Breitfart bigotry this morning. Battle Creek FTW!

@Alan Robertshaw: Thank you for that information. Meat lozenges sound more like real food than bouillon. Regarding your granny’s panacea, could bone broth be the new beef tea? Have you seen The Wildest Dream? The film shows Conrad Anker climbing in replica clothing, and getting up the Second Step without a ladder.

Kevin
Kevin
4 years ago

AsAboveSoBelow:

Discussion of mountaineering rations reminds me of the high calorie, high nutrition canned rations taken by Scott to the Antarctic. Ingredients included fat, processed meat, dried fruit and sugar all in the same can. In theory it was highly sustaining, but palatability proved a major drawback.

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
4 years ago

@Brony, glad to hear from you again. I hope that the stress is leveling off for you.

@Speak Centurion, if you can’t see the racism on Breitbart, you don’t know what racism is. (note that I’m conflating racism with racism advocacy, which is a valid conflation.)

@Shadowplay,

How about the third type (who are the majority)?

The ones who disliked Trump but detested Clinton enough to let that over-ride Trumps disgusting behavior.

The third type indicate that they are willing to support blatant, open racism and sexism in order to fight what they see as corruption. Even though the racist and sexist candidate is equally as corrupt as the worst perspective on Clinton – this by Trump’s own admission. He took pride in saying that he bought politicians. He was happy to play the role of The Corruptor, a Source Of Corruption. By his own admission.

Equally corrupt, but one of them comes with a heapin’ helpin’ of racism, sexism, bigotry, and loathing for common humanity.

Somehow I think that pulls your “group three” into “group one” by way of the transitive property.

Saw an interesting thing today which got me thinking:

“If you are afraid of a particular person as President, consider that maybe the Presidency has too much power.”

Is there a reason that you needed to vote in a corrupt fascistic demagogue in order to realize this? Next time, please just skip to the “we need to fight for a more democratic society” step instead of deliberately passing through the “hand off democracy to a human-despising greed machine” step first. Thanks.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

@ asabovesobelow

could bone broth be the new beef tea?

Mmm, that sounds nice. In my pre-veggie days I used to love roasting bones to use in stock (assuming the hound didn’t intercept them first). My grandma used a product called ‘King Beef’. You got me all nostalgic so I tried to see if you could still buy it. Apparently not. Boo.

I think that film might actually be where I got the bit about how effective the clothing was. Is it the one where they go on about their boots and how they’re basically just hobnailed hiking shoes?

@ Kevin

Heh, I made some of that (pemmican?) up for an event on Dartmoor. I’d scoffed it by the time I got to the M5. A mate fits the safety equipment to RAF planes. He tells me they use a type of very unpleasant tasting chocolate in the emergency rations to ensure the pilots don’t just eat it anyway.

Fishy Goat
Fishy Goat
4 years ago

@AsAboveSoBelow I saw the footage that Conrad’s team shot when they found Mallory but didn’t know a movie had been made of the Mallory expedition. Thanks!

Kevin
Kevin
4 years ago

Alan Robertshaw:

You are reminding me of Selectivemploymentax now, the British mercenary in ‘Asterix the Legionary.’ In a wry Gallic dig at British cuisine, the other soldiers are amazed at what he’ll willingly eat – and like it !

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

Hey it is called pemmican!

https://youtu.be/STzgXXU6GpI