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self-care trump

Put the Oxygen Mask on Yourself First: Dealing with the new realities of Trump’s America

Take care or yourself, or else you wont be able to take care of others
Take care or yourself, or else you wont be able to take care of others

When I finally went to bed late last night, there was a small part of me that hoped I would wake up this morning to find that Donald Trump’s improbable victory had been nothing more than a very bad dream.

Barring that, which I knew was a bit of a long shot, I hoped that I would at least wake up with the inklings of a plan for what to do about this catastrophe. I hoped I could write a rousing blog post sketching out my thoughts on the road ahead– for this blog and for the anti-Trump movement as a whole.

Alas, that didn’t happen either. I’m still processing the bad news, emotionally and intellectually. And I know a lot of you are doing the same.

And that’s ok. Trump will not take office until the end of January. There will be plenty of time to come up with ways to fight back against the orange one.

Right now the important thing is to take care of ourselves and those around us. Give yourself however much time you need. Avoid stress. Don’t beat yourself up for what happened, and don’t take out your anger on others on our side. Turn off the news if need be. Do whatever you need to do to clear your head and keep yourself safe.

In the comments here, feel free to continue the discussion that started in the “VOTE” post yesterday. And please share any self-help and self-care strategies you have — even if all you’ve got at the moment is pictures of cats and videos of hedgehogs.

If trolls show up, or if there is anything else that pops up in the thread that I should know about, please send me an email about it.

We can fight this thing. We can beat this thing. But first we need to get ourselves centered.

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sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
8 years ago

@snork
Yeah I heard.

Honestly, the next few years are going to be a time where Britain learns it is no longer the superpower it was (at least, those who don’t already know as such). The reason other countries invested in us so much was because of our connections, especially as one that linked the EU with the rest of the West. They only liked us for our friends and ability to work with them all. We throw that away at our detriment.

While MPs, both pro Leave and pro EU, seem to be saying they’ll support triggering 50, many from across all parties want to retain single market access and a co-operative if not close relationship with the EU. But public pressure on them is vital if we want to avoid so called Hard Brexit. I encourage people to keep writing and messaging even if their MP gives a flippant excuse. If enough people do it on the regular, we will get through to them. After all, it was only 17 million out of 65million that voted for Brexit. We need to speak up and show everyone who the real majority are.

Skiriki
Skiriki
8 years ago

@Masse_Mysteria

Then I found out that some anti-immigration, anti-muslim, anti-feminist (anti-younameit, really) Finns are super stoked that Trump won. Because now their lives will be better somehow? I’m just baffled.

Because this validates their worldview, fuck everything else, including the possibility that their worldview plus Trump will make their lives much, much worse.

@LittleLurker

Yesterday I read here that people on the Russian border (the Baltic states, Finland) worry about what might happen if Trump and Putin become best pals.

*lifts a hand*

This is because Trump has plans to gut NATO protections for Baltic states and plans to gut NATO, period. He wants to go back to some sort of mythological age where USA is completely isolated from the rest of the world.

And the reason why I’m so incredibly wary of all this is because 1) Putin is a big fuckin’ dangerous bully (not the sort that is a butt of jokes in teen comedies, the sort that’s closer to “does incredibly violent things if you don’t do what he wants you to do”), 2) my grandmother told me of the time of WWII from scant kilometers off the Soviet border, including coffins coming back, the endless stream of displaced Karelians and what really started off Winter War.

I have exactly zero faith in Tangerine Hitler and Stalin Wannabe (complete with cults of personality) to maintain any form of peace.

Moscow had contacts with Trump team during campaign, Russian diplomat says. Perhaps this is a lie, a bait? Or perhaps it is the truth. Right now Julian Assange is sprinkled with praise from David Duke, KKK, and Russia. In Duma, there was much rejoicing.

Meanwhile in America, people are being attacked:

Mother of all content warnings ahead, gross stuff incoming right now.

.

.

.

I really mean it, screencaps.

.

.

.

.

[pics removed by DF; concerned that they revealed some personal details]

Hate is the new normal.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
8 years ago

@ sunnys & snorkmaiden

I suspect the Supreme Court will uphold the High Court’s decision on the need for Parliamentary approval for service of the Art 50 notice.

Although the High Court’s approach was quite novel, it’s well argued and there is a rationale behind it. The Supreme Court will only overturn a decision if it’s a decision that “no reasonable tribunal applying the law correctly could possibly make”. So they won’t (shouldn’t) allow the appeal just because they themselves would have come to a different decision. Also the type of interpretation that the High Court used is one that the Supreme Court is pretty fond of anyway.

It’s an interesting example of interpreting constitutional law in a county with no written constitution.

If you want to bore yourselves silly here’s the actual judgment. And thankfully they’ve put up a copy where they got the contrast on the pdf right. The one they put up on the day was barely legible.

https://www.judiciary.gov.uk/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/judgment-r-miller-v-secretary-of-state-for-exiting-the-eu-20161103.pdf

Weird (and stunned) Eddie
Weird (and stunned) Eddie
8 years ago

link to some emotional resources for us:

http://everydayfeminism.com/2016/11/resources-to-process-election/

I actually first came to Mammothland from a link in an article on GG.

Cynical Optimist
Cynical Optimist
8 years ago

@Skiriki

And the most infuriating part of this is that these people will be “No true scotsman’d” in seconds.

I should pull these up next time someone says Trump isn’t racist or encouraging racism or misogyny. Unite the country my ass.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
8 years ago

Woke up, saw this, sharing this
https://mobile.twitter.com/Theresa_Caney/status/796265875628326912
The young are riddled with debt, disproportionately unemployed, living with their parents, and are facing a future without prospects. This is what everyone’s precious ‘economic anxiety’ actually looks like

Fishy Goat
Fishy Goat
8 years ago

@Axe I saw that yesterday. A bright spot in an otherwise horrible day.

Skiriki
Skiriki
8 years ago

@Cynical Optimist

Oh god, like you wouldn’t believe, that was definitely going on in tweets. Also, false flag and never happened and reporter is a known liar, too.

Malitia
Malitia
8 years ago

Sooooo I was reading the terrible screen caps in Skiriki’s post and hit the signs and then misread the one on the right as “Make America Groot Again”… What? Leave Groot out of this… and then I remembered this (it is pre-election “VOTE!” type advertisement, but dam 🙁 ):

comment image

… Sorry, apparently I can’t brain or properly type today. ^^;

kokoda
kokoda
8 years ago

Axecalibur……the political Establishment (Dem’s and Rep’s) engineered that economic anxiety via the ‘Trade Deals’ which were just a means to enrich the mega-corporations by offshoring jobs.

If you guys love Obama, he is the one behind TTP, TTIP, TISA, etc. He is also the one that enriched the rich (including the mega corps, hedge funds, Banksters, and Private Equity Groups) for the last 7 1/2 years.

But vote Establishment Dem and they will give you a crumb but destroy your future and the future of your children. The Dem’s also destroyed the Black family structure and now Welfare is the new Black Plantation. The Establishment Rep are equal pieces of garbage.

Which is why I voted Trump )(non-Establishment politician).

Weird (and stunned) Eddie
Weird (and stunned) Eddie
8 years ago

their worldview plus Trump will make their lives much, much worse

I encounter a LOT of whites who claim Reagan was so good for them because economic growth, etc., even though they KNOW that all the income increase went to people much higher on the food chain than they are, and even though they ADMIT that their personal situation was worse after Reagan. IT BURNS!!! The irony!!!

I don’t know which would be harder for these people, admitting that economic progressivism MIGHT be good for them personally, or admitting that conservatism HASN’T EVER BEEN.

Weird (and stunned) Eddie
Weird (and stunned) Eddie
8 years ago

@ Kokoda;

When the mega-corporations were offshoring jobs in the late 70’s and the 80’s, where WAS the Great Cheeto??? OH, YEAH, HE WAS GOLFING WITH THE CEOs OF THOSE MEGA-CORPORATIONS… AND HE STILL IS!!! Fool, you ELECTED the mega-corporations.

Oh, and TPP, etc. all pre-date Obama, TPP by 2 administrations.

Weatherwax
Weatherwax
8 years ago

@Skiriki

I came here to share a mildly humorous anecdote about how my day is going. After seeing the experiences you’ve shared, I can’t. I just can’t.

As a white Brit, I can’t imagine how scary living in the US must be right now for members of vulnerable groups. Everyone, please do everything you need to to stay safe, and know that you have my support and love, even if that’s of little practical help right now.

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
8 years ago

@kokoda

You’re a brave one.

Okay, so ignoring that Trump is one of the plutocrats who has literally been corrupting American democracy by manipulating those levers of the Establishment, and ignoring his ties to Russia. You get that. That’s a freebie.

Also ignoring Obama, who a lot of people here despise.

How do you defend all of the outbursts of racism, violence, misogyny and hate from the right that has come up in response to Trump’s win? You do realize that the casualties of your “fight against the Establishment” are the most vulnerable people in American society, right? You use them as a shield, to literally suffer and die so that you can “win”.

But Trump isn’t going to “win” you anything at all. It’s going to be the same fucking Establishment pain-engine, churning through the lives of citizens, consuming their wealth and breaking their hearts. It’s just going to be more blatant about it now.

Thanks, jackass.

Look up at Skiriki’s posts. That is the new normal. How do you defend your vote for Trump, knowing the misery that’s unfolding right now from the right wing? And will continue to unfold?

Eager for your reply,

Scildfreja Ylgness

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
8 years ago

@Nanuqi

I don’t have anything to say about any of that right now, other than this: I explicitly said I wouldn’t appreciate quackery, and you ignored me. Now I will ignore you.

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
8 years ago

@kochoda

Go fuck yourself.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo
weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo
8 years ago

Kokoda’s avatar of Wile E Coyote foolishly running off a cliff is pretty appropriate. It’s a pretty good representation of anyone who voted for Trump.

Weird (and stunned) Eddie
Weird (and stunned) Eddie
8 years ago

@ Kokoda;

To expand, the discussions that eventually led to TPP started during the Reagan administration. But really, the substance of your argument is that the Democrats allow the mega corporations to enrich themselves, and so do the Republicans. I agree, and I would advance that idea by contending that no one is going to be POTUS unless the mega-corporations (y’know the ones that actually MAKE the decisions) are comfortable with that person. What the electorate did by making Cheeto the POTUS is to “cut out the middleman”. I’d guess you haven’t been watching The Cheeto for the last 40 years, or you’d know, he IS of the same stock as the men (and be real, they are all white men) who moved our manufacturing economy to Asia. His first, last, and only interest (besides his own affirmation) is to enrich himself, and that’s always been his only interest. In the white house, he’ll do this by enriching corporate America. Big change… thanks’ I very sarcastically ‘preciate it….

At least we’ll get an order of magnitude increase in hate crimes because of the swill-pot he’s stirred up with his bigotry. Of course, THAT’S the real reason he was elected anyway.

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
8 years ago

I am so shocked that I came full circle. As an American, I am very ashamed of my country and I deeply apologize.

I just want to cry now for all the people who were victims of ‘The Orange Hitler’ and his minions.

It really hurts me that I can’t do anything except sign petitions. I have no idea how the world works and I don’t have the money to do much else. But I hope the very least I can do is continue to support and stand up for everyone here and those out in public.

I know there are some people here who are very angry and have every right to be but I think maybe we should calm down for a moment and think of all the things we can do to stop ‘The Orange Hitler’ and his minions and think of all the ways we can do to better ourselves and others. (Ex. Not saying ‘lets watch it burn”)

Weird (and stunned) Eddie
Weird (and stunned) Eddie
8 years ago

@ Skiriki

PLEASE share your anecdote!!!! We need it!

paul tidwell
paul tidwell
8 years ago

a backlash to his election is already beginning here where I am. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpZVErrGwik

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
8 years ago

I hope you’re able to get what you need, @Imaginary Petal <3. Pain makes everything so much harder. I have recurrent and fairly terrible back pain. All of my advice is based on wilderness survival remedies, which do work but aren't as strong as pharma – they're a stopgap. I can offer you no advice beyond the things I'm sure you already know.

Well, maybe one? Calm breathing, and don't hold your breath. Most people hold their breath or breathe irregularly while in pain, and also while typing. Slow, calm breathing will help CO2 regulation in the bloodstream, can reduce adrenaline levels and stress levels, etc. (Adrenaline production is tied to blood CO2 levels). I imagine none of this is news, but they're things I try to keep in mind.

And though it's hard, the stress from watching politics is pretty bad right now. Take time away from it when you can.

You can get through it!

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
8 years ago

@Fruitloopsie,

It really hurts me that I can’t do anything except sign petitions. I have no idea how the world works and I don’t have the money to do much else.

You can learn it. You don’t need to know all of it – so much of it is opinion anyways – just enough to know who to talk to.

Your state and federal representatives have offices. Send them a letter asking for information on how you can learn what they’re up to – them, personally, as well as the larger picture. You’ll be dealing with an intern or secretary, and they’re usually very happy to help, regardless of their political affiliation. You might get put on some annoying mailing lists, but you’ll also get up-to-date information on the bills that are being put forward. If your representative is Republican, then reach out to your local Democrats – they’ll be more than happy to give you ways to help that don’t involve money.

It’s free and not a huge investment of time – consider it at least!

Cynical Optimist
Cynical Optimist
8 years ago

@kokoda

Oh, the first troll invasion I can comment on.

Lemme see…

How is Trump Non-Establishment when he is surrounding himself with the Establishment? Especially when his policies cater to the desires of every Republican under Obama?

Was my response any good?

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
8 years ago

@cocopuffs

The Dem’s also destroyed the Black family structure and now Welfare is the new Black Plantation

You oblivious, entitled, selfish, racist wretch! Welfare is not a plantation. You are the plantation! A throwback to more hateful time. The embodiment of this country’s failings. Your ‘benign’ prejudice rings as hollow as did that of the Southern ‘planter’. He mused, as you now muse, about how, were we left to our own devices, we would surely choose his servitude. That his duty is in ‘protecting’ us, ‘providing for’ us. That he knows best for us. You know best for us?

There’s nothing wrong with my family, you purile, fascist, supremacist hack! You, as did your ‘planter’ predecessor, destroy the black family structure. He by selling children, you by enforcing ‘law and order’. Those I care most for will suffer the consequences of your actions and you lecture me on family! I will not lecture you any further. My time is worth more than that. Than you. Jackass

When the rest of y’all are done with his repugnant ass, let me know

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