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Alt-Righters respond to debate with rape jokes, conspiracy theories, intimations of violence

Winning!
Winning!

In the real world that you and I live in, the general consensus is that Hillary Clinton won last night’s debate. In the world inhabited by the alt-right and its fellow travelers, Trump crushed the evil Hillary even though she had help from a secret video screen hidden in plain sight on her lectern, possibly installed by George Soros himself.

Here, highlights from the Twitter feeds of some of the better-known alt-right Trump fans (and their fellow travelers).

First, some dispatches from alternate universes:

https://twitter.com/Cernovich/status/788992551650889729

https://twitter.com/ReactionaryTree/status/789059736922648576

https://twitter.com/ConCanadian/status/789136577586876416

https://twitter.com/WhiteGenociders/status/788934321189126144

Some Red Pillers hailed Trump for allegedly being a psychopath:

https://twitter.com/Empireanalysis/status/788998872060297216

There were, of course, an assortment of conspiracy theories:

https://twitter.com/Cernovich/status/788967788253581312

https://twitter.com/StefanMolyneux/status/788924320886185985

Couldn’t possibly be light reflecting off of the polished wood of the lectern. Must be Hillary using her SECRET DEBATE LIFELINE.

https://twitter.com/darth/status/789117564920016896

Some tried to gin up new fake controversies, like Hillary’s allegedly TREASONOUS revelation that America’s nuclear response time is … very short!

https://twitter.com/WDFx2EU7/status/789126925809688579

https://twitter.com/sbeckwilliams/status/789115842332073984

https://twitter.com/altrightwarfare/status/789141517378158592

TREASON! It’s not as if this was already widely known or anything oh wait never mind.

The lovely Matt Forney weighed in:

https://twitter.com/basedmattforney/status/788924608640589824

Dude, in that pic Trump’s teeth are exactly the same shade of brown. Because the picture is dark and the colors are off. In most pics, her teeth look fine (as do Trump’s).

https://twitter.com/basedmattforney/status/788930922448031745

Er, what? Metamucil is a fiber supplement. What relation it has to napping I have no idea.

Also, she doesn’t look tired. Just tired of Trump’s bullshit.

https://twitter.com/basedmattforney/status/788932118801940480

But of course. How could Matt possibly discuss the debate without making at least one rape joke.

Some alt-right Trump superfans were thinking beyond the election itself:

https://twitter.com/DrDavidDuke/status/788936357234126848

https://twitter.com/thebasedviking/status/789116096670490624

Er, land?

https://twitter.com/ReactionaryTree/status/787544349064175616

https://twitter.com/DonaldjBismarck/status/788947850948284416

And finally, a thought from the biggest idiot of the bunch:

The debate was RIGGED, I tells ya. Rigged!

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opposablethumbs
opposablethumbs
8 years ago

That blockbuster you’re pitching sounds like a really great night’s viewing! What’s the title?

Croquembouche of patriarchy
Croquembouche of patriarchy
8 years ago

@ Baron Jenks,
Oh snap! What action movie is complete without a wisecracking loyal sidekick and a young male sex worker with a heart of gold?

This movie must be made.

Weird (and wishing the election were today) Eddie
Weird (and wishing the election were today) Eddie
8 years ago

re: movie title

Stuff like “Hillerator”, “Clintonator” seems forced, I like the sound of “Thrillary”, but is it too derivative…? The MRA types would like “From Washington With Estrogen”, tho… 😉

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
8 years ago

So apparently there’s a new wing of the manosphere: Calvinist “complementarians”.

Well…looks like I need to make a Bingo of this!

BaronJenks
BaronJenks
8 years ago

I quite like the idea of something Presidenty as the title – “Executive Override” or “Presidential Veto”.

I wrote that post as a daft joke, but there’s been a surprising number of films where the President is an action hero.

dreemr
dreemr
8 years ago

@Scented Fucking Hard Chairs did an excellent job of articulating the reasons I, too, am all-in for Hillary, as did Axe. Primarily, her stance on abortion and womens’ rights are what I want, and I believe she will follow through on those as best she’s able.

I did like Bernie an awful lot, but I never really supported him. I just don’t think the time is right, yet, for a complete change to socialist ideals in the U.S. It’s just my feeling. I saw how hard it was for Obama to get anything done through the Congress and feel that Bernie would have even worse results. I do think he is very valuable where he is, and I really hope for a Dem win in the Senate to put him forward in a more powerful role.

Besides all that, I have been looking forward to an HRC presidency for a long long time. I am not at all a “they both suck” proponent. To me she is ideal.

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
8 years ago

@dreemr: I wasn’t always a Hillary fan…but once I watched an interview with her childhood friend (aka someone who actually knows her well) I found that she wasn’t anywhere near what many were claiming. But, long story short, I am SO with her!

@Everyone else: Sweet baby Jesus! I’m reading the Wartburg Watch and apparently according to these guys *questioning* is a sin! These people are a damn cult! I don’t know about you, but I would have to have a MAJOR lobotomy to follow those clowns! I swear, (not to be gross) I bet even pooping the wrong color is a sin! *Fred Phelps voice* If yer shit ain’t brown, yer goin’ down!” (I know he never said that but it’s fun to use his voice in mocking)

Also LMAO at “sanctified testosterone” and that same guy talking about how a heterosexual Christian man will be the only thing that’ll save this country. For a supposedly straight guy he seems to be gay for Jesus (not that there’s anything wrong with that…I just think it’s hilarious when a homophobic Christian man talks about Jesus in a marriage-like way).

pitshade
pitshade
8 years ago

As someone who is voting for Clinton but has reservations, for me it is personal. I was a fan of her work in the 90s, but 9-11 and the Iraq War era actions killed any enthusiasm.

Moggie
Moggie
8 years ago

Movie title: Hill of Destiny?

numerobis
numerobis
8 years ago

Her Iraq War vote is why Obama is currently president, rather than Clinton.

What did she do poorly with 9-11?

I’m not clear on whether I like her level of military intervention or not.

Not intervening means we risk something like Rwanda, where hundreds of thousands were murdered in a few weeks and which sparked a regional war with millions displaced, violent atrocities for decades, economic development halted and public health devastated.

Intervening means we risk something like Syria, where hundreds of thousands have died in several years of war and which has ended up being a regional war with millions displaced, violent atrocities for years, economic development halted and public health devastated.

Neither option looks great…

On the other hand, intervening in Libya seems to have been a mitigated success: it looked like there would be a big massacre in Benghazi and likely a bloody civil war. Instead, there’s only been a bloody civil war. In Kosovo, just as in Cypress, the killing stopped. In Sinjar (northern Iraq), Mali, and CAR, the genocides stopped when foreign powers intervened. So sometimes it succeeds.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
8 years ago

Re: movie title
Keep it simple. The First Lady. It works as her former position, her historic accomplishment, and her role as protagonist

Re: President Clinton hype
In the end, the Supreme Court is the end all be all. She could be a complete disaster otherwise, but, so long as we get a 6-3 bench, I’m down. I do think she’ll do a fine job, just keeping my eyes on the big prize

The thing is, Clinton has been the only choice for me since the primaries. My political infatuation with Sanders wore off real quick, and Republicans can all [bad things]. That leaves ‘you know who’. I’d been primed to hate Clinton like everyone else had. Lotta low key sexist bullshit. Then I actually looked into it and her, and now I’m a fan

Not everyone likes her, and there’s reasons not to like her. Some good reasons, innumerable terrible ones. Whatever conclusion one comes to about her is OK. Just make sure it’s for the right reasons (not getting on anyone here)

dreemr
dreemr
8 years ago

I will be waiting for Elizabeth Warren to run, too.

Frigid Virgin (hey, I'm trying to stop global warming over here, what's your excuse?)
Frigid Virgin (hey, I'm trying to stop global warming over here, what's your excuse?)
8 years ago

@Axecalibur: Thank you! Here’s to hoping I did it right…

I’m really only posting this to see if I have a shiny new GRAvatar or not, so forgive me if this feels like clutter to all of you.

Would you like a picture I found of Trump-cat as apology?

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/10/06/1412623865169_wps_31_Wet_Persian_cat_in_towel.jpg

(I wasn’t trying to make any kind of joke here what-so-ever. No, siree. I’m still not over that FUCKING interview, can you tell?)

All that aside: Hillary Clinton is pro-choice. Trump is not. Nuff said.

ColeYote
ColeYote
8 years ago

He showed what a dark triad is capable of when he sets his mind to something.

Incoherent nonsense and turning off anyone who isn’t already in his cult?

pitshade
pitshade
8 years ago

@ numerobis

What did she do poorly with 9-11?

The Patriot Act. After the initial horror of rne the attacks faded, my real fear was not of terrorism but the erosion of our rights and liberties. Combined with the racial profiling, attacks on mosques, the Act was the stuff of nightmares.

Binjabreel
Binjabreel
8 years ago

Whelp, most of the Internet is down today. Almost certainly a state actor, though the size of some of the IoT bot nets and the fact that the source code for some of the zombie malware has been released into the wild makes this not necessarily a foregone conclusion. This has been coming for about six months now, InfoSec folk have been talking about the coordinated DDoS attacks they’ve been seeing building. They amp up slowly, sending more and more traffic, then they suddenly vanish. Then the next week they pick back up at the exact level they left off at.

In short, our goddamned WiFi enabled Crock Pots are being leveraged to destroy modern society. I knew I hated these things.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
8 years ago

@ axe

Keep it simple. The First Lady

Can we have lots of cheesy 1980s style movie one-liners?

“Amend this!”

*Pow*

“Now that what I call an Executive Veto.”

That sort of thing?

guest
guest
8 years ago

‘I’d been primed to hate Clinton like everyone else had. Lotta low key sexist bullshit. Then I actually looked into it and her, and now I’m a fan.’

Me too.

ramen
ramen
8 years ago

I like that she pulled Bernie to the left on Hyde.

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
8 years ago

@guest: I third that

Binjabreel
Binjabreel
8 years ago

Hahaha how about it turns out one of the Supreme Court justices is in on the conspiracy, and during the dramatic showdown they get sliced in half by the scales of a falling statue of Justice.
“hows that for a separation of powers?”

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
8 years ago

@Frigid
Yaaay! And that cat thing is quite pretty 🙂

@Alan
I mean, obviously. What would even be the point otherwise?

Upon poisoning a foreign ambassador: ‘So much for diplomatic immunity’

After the CIA version of Q gives her a really badass gun: ‘May God bless the United States of America’

Speaking of movies and trite, Murican sayings, have you ever seen And Justice for All? 1979 Pacino, pretty good, weird af

@Binjabreel
Ha!

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
8 years ago

I’m not a fan of Hillary and I probably never will be. She’s just too far away from me on a purely ideological level. The dishonest arguments and hideous tactics she used in the primaries, and in the primaries 8 years ago, for me crossed a line from regular dirty politics to irresponsibly disingenuous, directly damaging fuckery.

She’ll probably still be one of my fav US presidents though. And Jill Stein is a fucking moron.

EJ (The Orphic Lizard)

Oooh! Oooh! We could do a gender-swapped version of Independence Day, in which Beyonce plays the hotshot pilot, Lenham Dunham plays the awkward Jewish genius, and Hillary Clinton is the President.

Moggie
Moggie
8 years ago

“E pluribus unum, motherfucker!”
*blows away white supremacist*