If a recent conversation on the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit is any indication, MGTOWs remain baffled by and terrified of the human vagina.
In the midst of one of that subreddit’s typically dreadful discussions, the subject of women in the military comes up. One Reddit MGTOW lets it be known that he “f**king hope[s] women get drafted some day.”
One of his comrades steps in to MGTOWsplain just why he thinks that would be a bad, bad thing:
So … how would that work, exactly?
Either Some_one498 thinks that
- Our enemies have secret squads of vagina-sniffing dogs that can detect the scent of menstrual blood from miles away, or
- Women are so incapacitated by the monthly visit from Aunt Flo that they’ll just lie there and let enemy soldiers capture them
I made Some_one498’s quote into a meme using a still from the Goldie Hawn comedy Private Benjamin, but somehow I don’t think it’s going to catch on.
tl;dr: Vaginas are scary!
Or is it
Men wilt.
Souffles weep.
Plants fall.
Or — oh, I don’t know.
But I do know this for sure: Women must never, ever mention that they are menstruating. Also, they must never mention anything about menstruation. Not to a man.
Okay, maybe if the man is the woman’s husband. That might be okay. But only if absolutely necessary. You’ll have to use your lady judgment on this. Don’t say anything your grandmother wouldn’t have said.
You know as well as I do that men rule the world.
But women — uh — rule the underworld. The Things That Must Not Be Mentioned. Sex and birth and stuff like that. Don’t mention them! Unless you have to. To your husband. Or maybe a doctor.
See, we’re very important — we rule the underworld, after all! — but the underworld is, I dunno, really close to hell. Something like that.
In summation: Use your lady powers wisely!
I don’t know if this dude knows this, but women are capable of doing things while on their period. (And trans men and non-binary people with vaginas. But we can’t mention them, or else the poor miggy-toeses heads might ‘splode.)
Like, we vagina-havers don’t get a week off a month to suffer in peace because we’re “incapacitated”. I don’t know anyone who was “incapacitated” by their period on a regular basis. I’ve been incapacitated a few times when it was really bad, but for the most part, it’s usually manageable.
We’re actually expected to just suck it up, not mention it (especially not to the poor widdle cishet mens who can’t handle the very mention of women’s biology but who still want to fuck us), and go about our lives. We got shit to do, so we just take some Midol, shove the hormonal roller coaster and cravings down, and just go do what we always do, bloating, bleeding, and pain be damned. And I feel like that goes double for vagina-having soldiers, who are on the battlefield or doing their regular duties or what-have-you.
I mean, statistically speaking, there’s a damn good chance that if you interact with a good number of cis women daily, you’ve met at least one cis woman on her period.
@Weirwood Tree Hugger: Communist Bonobo: I have a wonderful recipe for olive oil truffles, which I would probably sprinkle pink salt on. I imagine they’d take food coloring beautifully. I used to mix a few drops of red food coloring into a wine glass filled with chocolate syrup at Halloween events. It was surprisingly effective as a visual substitute for dark blood. I see no reason that truffles wouldn’t work the same way.
Re: red velvet cake bon-bons, I’ve made those and they’re amazing. A lot of work though. Here’s the recipe I used: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/67656/cake-balls/
@Kat
My bad. Is it okay to mention that my underpants are full of menses right now? Well, I guess not my underpants, but the pad lining them? And is it okay to mention that I have cloth pads, so I reuse them each month? My silly ladybrain is scattered due to my condition, so I forget what’s okay to say.
Or period shits!
so the purpose of this blog is…
1. get more pussy, or…
2. ???
david “futrelle” = bull dyke
I’m glad I no longer have periods, but more due to the misery factor of my uterus turning into a huge squeezed lemon of pain and hormones than anything. It is really annoying when guys (of the cis male variety) go all “ew ew ew NO oh gross” like little kids about the subject, when we get TMI about wanking and other bodily functions being thrown around by dudebros in general daily chat. I get it, I get it, boys, penis > vagina for your delicate sensibilities. God forbid women once monthly bleed out of the very orifice you so want to get into the rest of the time.
The menstruation euphemisms still make me gigglesnort. I may not like how it’s treated as a taboo subject in daily society, but all the terms are more about shared experience to me than using white- (red?) out on the truth.
@Petal + kupo + WWTH
http://cdn.niketalk.com/3/35/359dba68_Friday-Damn-Gif.gif
?
ETA: kupo, your name autocorrects to kill, and I love it!
This is weird. I went to an all boys school and I remember that at the rare times the subject of menstruation came up, it was talked about in tones of hushed fascination.
Don’t we usually get a troll or two in every MGTOW thread? Is the subject keeping them away?
@LindsayIrene
Maybe we can use menstruation as troll repellent?
If talking about menstruation squicked men out anywhere near as much as the PTB and setters of social norms claimed, we could use it as an actual combat technique.
@Kupo
Attract sharks and bears, repel trolls… It evens out.
The one thing I’ve worked out in my life is that different people have different experiences. For every woman I know who feels crappy pre-menstrual, there’s several with a variety of reactions to the first couple of days of their period. I know some who are aware of ovulating.
I felt pretty ok until I miscarried in my twenties. After that, the first couple of days of my period were like torture. Until I went on the pill, after which it was all a-ok.
I think there are a number of women who, if you attacked them during their period, would see it as an opportunity to let off steam. Same deal with some ovulating. Same deal with some pre-menstrual. Given that you can’t tell by looking a) where a woman is in her cycle, or b) which bit of her cycle will set her off, I’d suggest leaving women alone.
Which is no different from men and their unfathomable testosterone phases.
@kupo
Use your lady powers wisely: Never mention menstruation to a man unless you are married to him or he is your physician. And then only when absolutely necessary.
You have an awesome responsibility.
Shirk it and the patriarchy might faint.
@LindsayIrene
If menstruation keeps the MRAs away, let’s start mentioning it in every comment thread, like a posy against the plague.
@Axe
That video is the reaction I got from a couple of guys when I happened to mention the word mittelschmerz (a German word that English has borrowed; it means “middle pain,” as in pain associated with ovulation, which occurs in the middle of the menstrual cycle).
Middle-aged men.
FFS.
This seems like the appropriate soundtrack for the thread:
https://youtu.be/V00BEZV3jqs
@Weatherwax
Heh. Like, whoever’s got their period could give a report.
@Weatherwax
“And if straight men had periods, we’d never hear the end of it!” –Margaret Cho
@Kat
Several years ago my now-husband overcompensated and got me the REALLY heavy flow pads for when I had uh, leakage from the tampon. Fortunately they came in super useful not long after when my lurking uterine fibroids decided it was an awesome time to open up the gates to Hell all at once in a three-tampon alarm. He’d saved not only my butt and my pride, but several pairs of underwear.
This is why he’s a keeper. That and for putting up with me right before all the monthly detonations.
@PI, supermeerkat
“Fallen to the communists” is my new favourite euphemism.
@LindsayIrene
I like it. The BBC give a daily Shipping Forecast. It could be like that. For instance:
Weatherwax: Third day, mild flow, reducing.
Something like that?
@Kat
I see what you did thar 😀
New favorite word! Sorry, naturwissenschaften…
Speaking of Chris Morris series…
https://youtu.be/B076O8-PzH4?t=4m11s
@Shaenon’s point is the one I was puzzling out. I know women who have aged OUT of military service, so I can’t quite understand how the hell they think it is a new thing.
As far as incapacitating goes, I did have terrible cramps which made me vomit before my period, but after having had a child, they are mostly gone for some reason. Who knows.
@Diptych, I enjoyed that video on its own merits, and also because YouTube played a Tampax ad before it. It’s like they knew! (Maybe they did know? Targeted advertising confuses me.)