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MGTOW: Keep women out of combat because they’re easily captured while on their periods

Women having their periods are easy to locate due to white shorts, big smiles
Women having their periods are easy to locate due to white shorts, big smiles

If a recent conversation on the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit is any indication, MGTOWs remain baffled by and terrified of the human vagina.

In the midst of one of that subreddit’s typically dreadful discussions, the subject of women in the military comes up. One Reddit MGTOW lets it be known that he “f**king hope[s] women get drafted some day.”

One of his comrades steps in to MGTOWsplain just why he thinks that would be a bad, bad thing:
Some_one498 1 point 13 hours ago I hope they don't. Women would just get in the way which would cause more casualties. A woman wouldn't be able to carry a dying member away from danger. Depending on where they are their monthly cycles would cause the enemy to be able to catch them easier. So many reasons for women not to be in combat roles. It just doesn't make sense

So … how would that work, exactly?

Either Some_one498 thinks that

  1. Our enemies have secret squads of vagina-sniffing dogs that can detect the scent of menstrual blood from miles away, or
  2. Women are so incapacitated by the monthly visit from Aunt Flo that they’ll just lie there and let enemy soldiers capture them

I made Some_one498’s quote into a meme using a still from the Goldie Hawn comedy Private Benjamin, but somehow I don’t think it’s going to catch on.

private-benjamin_phixr

tl;dr: Vaginas are scary!

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Kat
Kat
4 years ago

Or is it

Men wilt.

Souffles weep.

Plants fall.

Or — oh, I don’t know.

But I do know this for sure: Women must never, ever mention that they are menstruating. Also, they must never mention anything about menstruation. Not to a man.

Okay, maybe if the man is the woman’s husband. That might be okay. But only if absolutely necessary. You’ll have to use your lady judgment on this. Don’t say anything your grandmother wouldn’t have said.

You know as well as I do that men rule the world.

But women — uh — rule the underworld. The Things That Must Not Be Mentioned. Sex and birth and stuff like that. Don’t mention them! Unless you have to. To your husband. Or maybe a doctor.

See, we’re very important — we rule the underworld, after all! — but the underworld is, I dunno, really close to hell. Something like that.

In summation: Use your lady powers wisely!

Paradoxical Intention - Resident Cheeseburger Slut

Women are so incapacitated by the monthly visit from Aunt Flo that they’ll just lie there and let enemy soldiers capture them

I don’t know if this dude knows this, but women are capable of doing things while on their period. (And trans men and non-binary people with vaginas. But we can’t mention them, or else the poor miggy-toeses heads might ‘splode.)

Like, we vagina-havers don’t get a week off a month to suffer in peace because we’re “incapacitated”. I don’t know anyone who was “incapacitated” by their period on a regular basis. I’ve been incapacitated a few times when it was really bad, but for the most part, it’s usually manageable.

We’re actually expected to just suck it up, not mention it (especially not to the poor widdle cishet mens who can’t handle the very mention of women’s biology but who still want to fuck us), and go about our lives. We got shit to do, so we just take some Midol, shove the hormonal roller coaster and cravings down, and just go do what we always do, bloating, bleeding, and pain be damned. And I feel like that goes double for vagina-having soldiers, who are on the battlefield or doing their regular duties or what-have-you.

I mean, statistically speaking, there’s a damn good chance that if you interact with a good number of cis women daily, you’ve met at least one cis woman on her period.

Aunt Podger
Aunt Podger
4 years ago

@Weirwood Tree Hugger: Communist Bonobo: I have a wonderful recipe for olive oil truffles, which I would probably sprinkle pink salt on. I imagine they’d take food coloring beautifully. I used to mix a few drops of red food coloring into a wine glass filled with chocolate syrup at Halloween events. It was surprisingly effective as a visual substitute for dark blood. I see no reason that truffles wouldn’t work the same way.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

Re: red velvet cake bon-bons, I’ve made those and they’re amazing. A lot of work though. Here’s the recipe I used: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/67656/cake-balls/

@Kat
My bad. Is it okay to mention that my underpants are full of menses right now? Well, I guess not my underpants, but the pad lining them? And is it okay to mention that I have cloth pads, so I reuse them each month? My silly ladybrain is scattered due to my condition, so I forget what’s okay to say.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

I used to mix a few drops of red food coloring into a wine glass filled with chocolate syrup at Halloween events. It was surprisingly effective as a visual substitute for dark blood.

Or period shits!

jorge videla
jorge videla
4 years ago

so the purpose of this blog is…

1. get more pussy, or…

2. ???

david “futrelle” = bull dyke

Banananana dakry
Banananana dakry
4 years ago

I’m glad I no longer have periods, but more due to the misery factor of my uterus turning into a huge squeezed lemon of pain and hormones than anything. It is really annoying when guys (of the cis male variety) go all “ew ew ew NO oh gross” like little kids about the subject, when we get TMI about wanking and other bodily functions being thrown around by dudebros in general daily chat. I get it, I get it, boys, penis > vagina for your delicate sensibilities. God forbid women once monthly bleed out of the very orifice you so want to get into the rest of the time.

The menstruation euphemisms still make me gigglesnort. I may not like how it’s treated as a taboo subject in daily society, but all the terms are more about shared experience to me than using white- (red?) out on the truth.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
4 years ago

@Petal + kupo + WWTH
http://cdn.niketalk.com/3/35/359dba68_Friday-Damn-Gif.gif
😁

ETA: kupo, your name autocorrects to kill, and I love it!

BGHilton
4 years ago

This is weird. I went to an all boys school and I remember that at the rare times the subject of menstruation came up, it was talked about in tones of hushed fascination.

LindsayIrene
4 years ago

Don’t we usually get a troll or two in every MGTOW thread? Is the subject keeping them away?

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@LindsayIrene
Maybe we can use menstruation as troll repellent?

Aunt Podger
Aunt Podger
4 years ago

If talking about menstruation squicked men out anywhere near as much as the PTB and setters of social norms claimed, we could use it as an actual combat technique.

LindsayIrene
4 years ago

@Kupo

Attract sharks and bears, repel trolls… It evens out.

Weatherwax
Weatherwax
4 years ago

The one thing I’ve worked out in my life is that different people have different experiences. For every woman I know who feels crappy pre-menstrual, there’s several with a variety of reactions to the first couple of days of their period. I know some who are aware of ovulating.

I felt pretty ok until I miscarried in my twenties. After that, the first couple of days of my period were like torture. Until I went on the pill, after which it was all a-ok.

I think there are a number of women who, if you attacked them during their period, would see it as an opportunity to let off steam. Same deal with some ovulating. Same deal with some pre-menstrual. Given that you can’t tell by looking a) where a woman is in her cycle, or b) which bit of her cycle will set her off, I’d suggest leaving women alone.

Which is no different from men and their unfathomable testosterone phases.

Kat
Kat
4 years ago

@kupo

My bad. Is it okay to mention that my underpants are full of menses right now? Well, I guess not my underpants, but the pad lining them? And is it okay to mention that I have cloth pads, so I reuse them each month? My silly ladybrain is scattered due to my condition, so I forget what’s okay to say.

Use your lady powers wisely: Never mention menstruation to a man unless you are married to him or he is your physician. And then only when absolutely necessary.

You have an awesome responsibility.

Shirk it and the patriarchy might faint.

Weatherwax
Weatherwax
4 years ago

@LindsayIrene

If menstruation keeps the MRAs away, let’s start mentioning it in every comment thread, like a posy against the plague.

Kat
Kat
4 years ago

@Axe
That video is the reaction I got from a couple of guys when I happened to mention the word mittelschmerz (a German word that English has borrowed; it means “middle pain,” as in pain associated with ovulation, which occurs in the middle of the menstrual cycle).

Middle-aged men.

FFS.

LindsayIrene
4 years ago

This seems like the appropriate soundtrack for the thread:

https://youtu.be/V00BEZV3jqs

@Weatherwax

Heh. Like, whoever’s got their period could give a report.

Banananana dakry
Banananana dakry
4 years ago

@Weatherwax

“And if straight men had periods, we’d never hear the end of it!” –Margaret Cho

@Kat

Several years ago my now-husband overcompensated and got me the REALLY heavy flow pads for when I had uh, leakage from the tampon. Fortunately they came in super useful not long after when my lurking uterine fibroids decided it was an awesome time to open up the gates to Hell all at once in a three-tampon alarm. He’d saved not only my butt and my pride, but several pairs of underwear.

This is why he’s a keeper. That and for putting up with me right before all the monthly detonations.

Weatherwax
Weatherwax
4 years ago

@PI, supermeerkat

“Fallen to the communists” is my new favourite euphemism.

Weatherwax
Weatherwax
4 years ago

@LindsayIrene

I like it. The BBC give a daily Shipping Forecast. It could be like that. For instance:

Weatherwax: Third day, mild flow, reducing.

Something like that?

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
4 years ago

@Kat

mittel… middle… middle… Middle…

I see what you did thar 😀

mittelschmerz

New favorite word! Sorry, naturwissenschaften…

Diptych
Diptych
4 years ago

“Teh gayz can’t handle the rigours of conflict.”

Speaking of Chris Morris series…

https://youtu.be/B076O8-PzH4?t=4m11s

Steampunked
Steampunked
4 years ago

@Shaenon’s point is the one I was puzzling out. I know women who have aged OUT of military service, so I can’t quite understand how the hell they think it is a new thing.

As far as incapacitating goes, I did have terrible cramps which made me vomit before my period, but after having had a child, they are mostly gone for some reason. Who knows.

Viscaria
Viscaria
4 years ago

@Diptych, I enjoyed that video on its own merits, and also because YouTube played a Tampax ad before it. It’s like they knew! (Maybe they did know? Targeted advertising confuses me.)

Aunt Podger
Aunt Podger
4 years ago

I think the trolls are actually staying away because this is too stupid a position to be defensible, even for them. “I’m not dying upon that bloody hill.”

JoeB
JoeB
4 years ago

I kind of want to drop this article into various points in the manosphere just to see the kind of takes they come up with.

Mating with younger females helps male spiders dodge cannibalism

Sporkey
Sporkey
4 years ago

One I love, that I stole from The Onion: communists in the funhouse

Also, I wasn’t allowed to use euphemisms ever…penis, vagina, period or menstruation…I don’t really use the euphemisms but I love laughing at them. I do, however, use some very creative language regarding stress and my period.

On MGTOW:

Husband: “WHAT DOES IT EVEN MEAN??”
Me: “No one really knows, they certainly don’t go their own way”

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

After all this talk of bon-bons and red velvet I had to stop by the store and pick up some pumpkin puree. We’ll see if I have the energy to convert it into bread later. 🙂

Shaenon
4 years ago

Not to mention that, with the cultural references he used for her childhood, he must think women go through menopause in their early 30s.

Combine this with all the guys afraid of 68-year-old Hillary Clinton getting PMS while President, and you realize a lot of men (and a disturbingly high number of women) have no idea how the female body works.

Back in the ’90s, then-Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich argued against allowing servicewomen to take on combat roles because “females have biological problems staying in a ditch for thirty days because they get infections.”

And let us never forget the NASA personnel asking Sally Ride if 100 tampons would be sufficient for a two-week space mission.

Shaenon
4 years ago

P.S. feeeeeeeeeemales

Grr! Arrgh!
Grr! Arrgh!
4 years ago

I enjoy the Chinese military is on Parade (all those red flags), taking the elevator in The Overlook Hotel and cattle-skull issues. My son of an obgyn husband once told me that anatomical diagrams of the female reproductive system reminded him of O’Keefe’s cattle skull. He’s not wrong.

Tosca
Tosca
4 years ago

Fellow vagina-havers, we may have discovered the ultimate anti-pickup technique. Should you be approached by a PUA, MRA, MGTOW or similar, look them square in the eye and say “I am having my period right now. I am bleeding from my vagina. There are clots. Big ones.”

During your next period, take a few photos of the used don’t-bleed-down-my-leg method of your choice. Keep them on hand. Should you receive an unsolicited dick pic, send him an unsolicited Used Tampon or Full Diva Cup pic. See if he continues the harassment after that.

I think I’m onto something here.

Aunt Podger
Aunt Podger
4 years ago

@kupo, Buy extra, go to Tastykitchen.com and look up “pumpkin baked oatmeal.” Wonderful recipe for when you have no energy— quick clean-up as well.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@Aunt Podger
Muffins are already in the oven, but they called for less than half a can, so I still have enough to try that oatmeal recipe later. I wonder if it can be converted to an overnight recipe–I love overnight slow cooker oatmeal. Thanks for sharing!

msexceptiontotherule
msexceptiontotherule
4 years ago

If being on your period can attract bears, how do any women manage to live in Canada without there being an increase in news reports of women on their periods being chased by bears?

Has to be a conspiracy on the part of the media! The only thing that makes sense!

P.S.
It’s shark week. As of Monday.

epitome of incomprehensibility

And let us never forget the NASA personnel asking Sally Ride if 100 tampons would be sufficient for a two-week space mission.

What? For real?!? Huh.

…A little off-topic, but a while ago I thought of a way of demystifying PMS symptoms for those who’ve never had them. Imagine you’re:

a) constipated and therefore bloated, with an uncomfortable and maybe cramping abdomen
b) have had 2-3 hours less sleep than normal, so you’re tired, not necessarily grumpy but more likely to be grumpy if the occasion should arise, and perhaps have a headache

See? Not terribly mysterious or unimaginable… But then again, that’s just what it feels like for me. I thought of that because a guy friend expressed sympathy that women had to go through “tougher health issues” and mentioned periods. He wasn’t all ew-gross about it, and nowhere near as ridiculous as the people David quoted, but I still thought it was a bit… overstated? I don’t know. Plus, I think men and women are pretty even when it comes to health problems. Thoughts?

Ledasmom
Ledasmom
4 years ago

How sad to learn all these euphemisms at a time when I have increasingly-little use for them.
(If I am not at menopause, I am at least at meno-super-slo-mo)

Steampunked
Steampunked
4 years ago

@epitome of incomprehensibility – wasn’t there a persistent story a while back regarding army-issued undergarments where someone discovered that ‘average B cup size’ was taken to mean ‘Most women are B-cup, so order all B-cup size bras for army-issued undergarments’.

I’m still not sure if that one was real or not, it sounds so bizarre.

Again, eh, as far as periods go, mine involved vomiting and terrible pain and two days diarrhea each time. The pain was really bad, and could interfere with me walking, let alone doing anything else.

Apparently it runs in the family, according to my mother.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@epitome of incomprehensibility
I think a lot of people conflate PMS and PMDD, and a lot of people also don’t realize how much it can vary from one person to the next.

For me, if I’m symptomatic it’s more like a bad flu. I’ll have diarrhea, abdominal cramps so bad I can’t get our of bed, headache so bad I can’t move my head much, lower back pain so bad I can’t stand up, achy muscles, severe fatigue, brain fog, forgetfulness, swollen ankles, and really heavy bleeding. Some of those symptoms last for up to 3 weeks at varying levels of severity.

Thankfully that’s rare anymore and lately it’s more like what you described.

Aunt Podger
Aunt Podger
4 years ago

They tell the story of the origin of the “periods attract bears” myth on an episode of Stuff Mother Never Told You. Apparently, there was a mass bear mauling at one of the parks, possibly Yellowstone, and a random park ranger who told a reporter, “Well, maybe there was a menstruating woman in the party,” when asked why it happened. So, some speculating jackass ignited a tinder box of the collective brain, and that was that.

I’m also mildly certain the Mammotheers already know that your average shark knows the difference between uterine sloughage and actual blood the way most of us humans can tell the difference between ice cream and the picture on the box.

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
4 years ago

Since we’re talking periods, mine are usually very unpleasant (with more intense symptoms than average but not as bad as Steampunked–my condolences) but I can usually grit my teeth, take a pain reliever and push through anything. Keeping chocolate on hand helps.

I mostly avoid euphemisms but sometimes I find myself calling my period “Morgana” (like in Merlin), “the clock-and-calendar syndrome”, “riding the cotton broomstick” or “red tide”. I usually just say period though.

My symptoms are horrible cramps, headaches, irritability (which goes hand in hand with the cramps), sweet and salty cravings, overall bloating (especially in the belly, face and ankles), heavy bleeding and fatigue

Diptych
Diptych
4 years ago

“the clock-and-calendar syndrome”

I like it.

Fabe
Fabe
4 years ago

And let us never forget the NASA personnel asking Sally Ride if 100 tampons would be sufficient for a two-week space mission.

Seriously? Wow, at a cost of about $10,000 per pound to launch stuff on the space shuttle 100 tampons for a two-week mission would have been a huge waste of money .

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
4 years ago

@Dipytich: Thanks! This OP came a couple days too late–ah well I can always hope for another “not-the-period!” post to come up during a future period. Till then maybe I can join in on the “period talk keeps the trolls away” party.

Tessa
Tessa
4 years ago

Shaenon:

Back in the ’90s, then-Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich argued against allowing servicewomen to take on combat roles because “females have biological problems staying in a ditch for thirty days because they get infections.”

I’m scared to ask what the heck is “reasoning” was.

Fabe:

Seriously? Wow, at a cost of about $10,000 per pound to launch stuff on the space shuttle 100 tampons for a two-week mission would have been a huge waste of money .

I know right? I don’t typically reach number 100 until at least the third week of my period.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
4 years ago

@epitome

Plus, I think men and women are pretty even when it comes to health problems. Thoughts?

Wikipedia has a hubpage on “Male genital diseases”. Some of that stuff has a female bodied equivalent (either may be more common), some of it’s not that big a deal unless you’re tryna conceive, some is more odd or embarrassing than outright dangerous, and some is truly terrible. Tesicular torsion is fuckin nightmare fuel. Tried lookin at hormone related issues (eg hypoandrogenism), but my eyes glazed over from all the jargon

Not sure how to make a comparison between the sexes (and how intersex folks fit). Even if I could, comparing health problems would probably seem a bit ‘wut abowt teh menz’ coming from a dude anyway *shrug*

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

My PMS is different every single month. Sometimes I barely notice it. Sometimes I have the works. Crankiness, fatigue, cravings, bloating, zits, body aches even clutziness.

My period only lasts 2-3 days but I usually get fairly bad cramps.

Even at its worse I’m still completely functional though.

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
4 years ago

@WWTH: I’m glad you’re also completely functional even on your worst periods. So much for being “incapacitated” lol

Mine typically lasts 5 days and I always get the Katie-damned cramps (even during PMS). I once thought being a redhead was a factor in menstrual symptom severity (especially with cramps and bleeding)…turns out that was a myth.

Banananana dakry
Banananana dakry
4 years ago

Urgh. Mine varied from nausea/ bloating/cramping / lower pain threshold/ worsening of anxiety and or depression symptoms/ bizarre ass cravings for all the fats, salts, and vinegar of the world to nearly nothing. My body would get creative, flip the 1d6 on what it’d afflict me with, and go “And THIS month’s special is moodiness, fatigue, and dill pickle cravings!”. The actual period was a relief because it was at least just physical discomfort and not the horrible things hormone fluctuations did to my brain.

I kept my ovaries after my hysterectomy, so I still get symptoms, but they’re not as bad most of the time. And hygiene products and pregnancy are happily a nonissue.