You may remember Aaron Clarey — also known as “Captain Capitalism” — as one of the random manospherians interviewed for the cinematic abomination known as The Sarkeesian Effect. I don’t quite remember if he made it into the final cut of the official, er, “film.” He definitely did appear in Davis Aurini’s bootleg version, pontificating about the alleged lack of ethics in American journalism while, for some unknown reason, wearing a cravat.
Turns out that Mr. Clarey’s definition of “ethics” is a rather unique one.
On Monday, Clarey encouraged his blog readers to take advantage of a unique opportunity to earn some sweet, sweet cash — helping students cheat their way through college by writing their essays and term papers for them.
Clarey posted a pitch from his apparent pal Aleksey Bashtavenko, the head of something called Academic Composition, who started off by thanking Clarey for sending so many aspiring , er, ghostwriters his way in the past.
I’d like to personally thank Aaron and all of you who follow his blog Captain Capitalism, you guys have been the main driving force behind the recent growth of our enterprise.
After a slow summer, “Alex” reported,
we’re definitely getting much busier and this may well be our most lucrative semester yet.
Quite a few people have inquired about job opportunities with us and we weren’t able to receive help from all of you. Yet, we could definitely use all of the support we can get. Within a month, we will be entering the busiest juncture of the academic year and it will last all the way through the end of 2016.
As you can see, he’s all about the high-quality prose.
Alex, who claims his “full-time writers earn over $3,000 per month,” also has some job openings in the Craigslist spamming “subcontracting” department as well.
We’re also looking to expand our ranks of Craigslist subcontractors. Many of you have been posting for us regularly and invariably, this helped us get to where we are today. We pay $5 for each lead our subcontractors generate and another $1 for each day your ads have been live.
Presumably Clarey is getting paid for posting this. Is there anyone in the manosphere who isn’t some kind of grifter?
I don’t understand why anyone would cheat. I genuinely desire to learn more, get better, challenge myself, practice useful skills, and test whether I truly understand things. I mean, I’m quite aware that intellectual laziness exists, and how such people generally think and act. But I don’t think I’ll ever truly understand it.
Actually, it’s all about ethics in gaming…the system. (Or what these stupid gits think the system is.)
It’s so hilarious that they think men are just naturally better at everything, and then they try to scam them into buying cheat-sheets for the things they’re not so good at (or not supposed to be so good at, because only girls are supposed to be good at “useless” stuff like the humanities). Just goes to prove that men are maybe not so good at everything, after all…and some men, particularly the ones peddling this bullshit, are not good at all.
Fail big, fellas.
@Scildfreja:
If you’re looking for hard topics, then my go-to would be “Numerical approximation of minimum stable orbits for planets orbiting P-type binaries” and “turbulence effects just below the Kármán line.” (I apologise for the pain I may just have caused any other physicists.)
If you’re looking for topics which are not that difficult but would hurt people who buy into a #BraveHero mindset, I would suggest that the great postmodernist thinkers would be the best place to start: Derrida, Foucault, Barthes. For bonus points, make them use those methods to analyse a videogame which Gamergaters love. Dark Souls, for example, or FF7.
Now that I think about it, I sort of want to write an analysis of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic using Reception theory.
You need to have a well-balanced education, regardless of what your primary focus is. A pure STEM education only makes you good at rationally and logically reasoning yourself into not-even-wrong levels of stupid. Having intellectual tools doesn’t do much good if you don’t have at least a broad context of the reality you’re using them in.
You just broke my heart. I didn’t know it was so precious to gators.
I actually met my ex playing DaS. Took the habit of summoning helpers for the sake of co-op, chose the one with the biggest sword to go against Quelaag. Then two years and a half of love.
To this day it’s still one of my favorite games ever, another one being FF not 7 but 9.
@John:
Dark Souls is (I’m told) a good enough game that a lot of people will like it just because it’s good, and will then project their own politics onto it. Gators, for example, claim to love it because it’s so difficult that all the casuals and essjews and girls can’t play it, letting them show their manliness.
(That’s Reception theory in a nutshell, in fact.)
I run a copywriting company now, so I don’t have to hang out on freelance marketplaces any more, but when I did – the amount of people asking to have their papers, essays, theses done was mind boggling. I scared the ever loving shit out of a few by contacting them and asking if they had gotten permission from xxxxx (the head of the department at their college) to outsource their homework. Still have a few terrified weepy emails, LOL
Well, shit, what the hell did I exclusively dig out my PS3 to play a few months ago?
Am I still allowed to play Fallout 4, or is that also reserved for
whiny spoiled babiesthe manliest*, most elite, STEM-logical-est super-ethical gamers?*where “man” = cis man
ETA: I’m not accusing the other EJ of thinking like this; I’m being super sarcastic about Gaters.
Manbabies got so upset when I handed their asses to them in Bust-a-Move that I had to stop playing it online because it got too boring. Even when I would go easy on them they’d start using gendered slurs as soon as I won a game. One begged and pleaded in between gendered slurs for me just to let him get the achievement. That guy was funny.
But yeah, women suck at gaming. (Cue manbaby trolls pointing out that it’s not a skilled game because it has cute avatars and colorful bubbles.)
@EJ
It’s fucking great. It’s not actually hard, it just takes one of a few specific mindsets. The one that works for me is paying attention, that’s all. Weirdly, it’s also what gators fail at. Go figure. Then again learning the game by heart and pulling pre-made tactics also works… except in PvP.
My ex destroyed the shit out of any fool who went in PvP against her. I know that because I took the opportunity as helper to sit back and have a smoke while enjoying the duel, not lifting a finger to help her. It turned out that a lot of the guys we went against around the summer of 2014 were gators, and she got a lot of abuse hate-mail for wrecking them under an obviously female pseudonym. By the magic of less-than-busy servers, they all eventually invaded us again (it’s random, so you can’t choose your target) and got their asses handed to them again, except then she wasn’t so soft to their ego and pulled off weird, glorious and risky tactics. Sometimes they went 4 against 2, and she somehow handled the 3 that I was not fighting myself.
Her favorite joke was to look at my sword (usually a katana) and say that hers was bigger.
And people wonder why I can’t get over her. *long sigh*
@Scildfreja
(sorry for the long winded reply)
I do that ! Not as often as I should, though. My approach to atheism is that it doesn’t have answers beyond “God is not actually gonna send me to hell for not being a fundie asshole” so I tend to take that as a value of openness in itself. I realize that’s wrong. I know what you mean about mental hygiene (I’ve also read your other post about it in one of the other threads and it was really enlightening, thank you). I’ve been to prayer services and the like with friends of various beliefs, and found myself overwhelmed by the sheer humanity there. I don’t know if I can ever believe in God(s) but I know that what I’ve experienced is far more than enough for me. I guess I kinda cherry-pick the teachings ?
@EJ
Personally, I hate FF7. It was way too damn long and playing it felt like such a slog. Xenogears was much better, and probably could have had a better budget for disc 2 if it weren’t for FF7. I always think of Shakhan when I see Aurini.
Said no RPG fan ever.
Get outta here, fake geek boy.
@Sinkable IQ
I was referring to the fact that he thinks that GGers like FF7; I never claimed to be a fan of RPGs, dipshit.
@Anne Lewis:
The sarcasm was pretty obvious, and I thought it was funny.
Then my point stands, and also you still can’t grasp sarcasm. Anything new ?
*gasp* He’s back!
I must alert the Mammotheers!
http://www.imgur.com/gallery/cYwtRCH
@MiG
Fuck you asshole. You request a fucking Terza Rima and don’t even have the decency to wait for my post? You know what, here it is, baka.
Inferno’s form.
Somewhere, beyond the azure horizon,
Lies a place crowned with sand and coral reef.
Where gulls doze in the land of Clipperton.
A visitor, compelled by his belief,
powered by aspirations of manhood,
Will sooth his sore ego with sweet relief.
He’ll prove those women wrong with his plywood,
His wits, his skills and his hunting prowess,
Shall expose them as meek as a bird’s brood.
Mig’s boat has landed and he is breathless,
As countless Seagulls lay still and rested.
A perfect setting to nab the brainless.
Perhaps if he heard what was suggested,
and approached in some camouflaged attire,
He would not be so easily bested.
The flock flew far from the slow non-flyer.
As the night descends and brings cold, harsh wind,
Mig soon found out he could not make his fire.
“This chill is nothing”, said Mig as he grinned.
Soon they’ll say “forgive us for we have sinned.”
@Oogly
This is definitely one of my favorite. Although I’m kinda disappointed you made no mention of penis power.
Welcome back!
You do appear to be claiming the “GamerGater” tag, though! What is it about the GamerGate phenomenon that calls to you, and what sorts of things do you do as a GamerGater?
@Sinkable Appetite
Don’t expect me to disappear just because you want to act like a pissant (a role you should require little training to fit into); unlike you, I didn’t come into this world pre-equipped with a white flag to wave at every person who wanted to do me harm, you flint-brained amphibian.
@John, that’s great! It’s important to not get too caught up in the black-and-whiteness of fact-finding, and remember that there are humans involved. Also, that our own truth-identification system is deeply flawed. I don’t have much opportunity to go to religious services of any stripe, but I’ve usually found the same thing you have. (Not all are so great, though, obviously)
Do we typically train pissants?
@OoglyBoogles
I already read that one in the other thread and commented. You didn’t have to do it if you didn’t want to; I was only testing your abilities, it’s not like I wanted you to write a poem for me or anything.
Accusing French people of surrendering constantly? Is it 2003 again? Does that mean that we can wear waistcoats and skinny jeans again?
What I apparently did come pre-equipped for is making you switch to insults on your second post.
By the way, don’t lose too much of your shit over me, it’s telling. I may be the one identifiably male commenter who’s adressed you so far, but by only replying to me, you’re just proving another well-known troll pattern. Thought I’d give you a heads-up this time, since you do this consistently.