I’ve gotten a number of extremely thoughtful responses from assorted alt-right twitterists to my post yesterday in which I offered an improved version of the new alt-right logo, with a Ku Klux Klanner head replacing the stylized “a.”
And by “thoughtful,” I mean “don’t read the following tweets if you’re not in the mood for jokes about murder, suicide, and the Holocaust and/or a defense of the KKK’s lynching of black people.”
I think I hear your oven timer going off, it's at 616 degrees right now.
— GrauTiger? (@PZKW117) September 12, 2016
https://twitter.com/soObviousTurtle/status/775460982239989760
https://twitter.com/AmericanReset88/status/775488975544856576
https://twitter.com/NationalistHero/status/775468355109007360
https://twitter.com/RedskinRey624/status/775469805046337536
https://twitter.com/RedskinRey624/status/775477705978421248
Oh look, a death wish:
@mc_morn Another leftist loser living with his mother. Delete your acct. David, then yourself. pic.twitter.com/tEyZAWiXCc
— Concierge Monthly (@ConciergeMthly) September 12, 2016
Followed by a death threat:
@mc_morn Save us the trouble of hunting you down…..:)
— Concierge Monthly (@ConciergeMthly) September 12, 2016
This one, posted by someone using a picture of racist mass murderer Anders Breivik as an avatar and featuring a photo of actual dead people, is a little too NSFW to post here.
Given the, er, high racist content of these responses, I’m not quite sure why exactly any of these people are mad about being compared to the KKK.
To be fair, though, they weren’t all mad. There was one Pepe-avatared alt-right Twitterer who liked my fixed logo:
https://twitter.com/freed_humanity/status/775459668562849792
Oh, and FYI, Twitter Nazis, I’m not actually Jewish. Like a lot of the people sporting “echoes” around their names on Twitter, I added the marks as a tiny little “I’m Spartacus”-style act of solidarity. That said, I did go to a Jewish day camp for several summers as a kid. One time we got to meet Sandy Koufax! That makes me practically a Jew.
@John
Not even remotely in the same ballpark as you, but the girl with whom I had my 1st real sexual experience… Years later, some stuff happened and things were said, and I hate her guts now. She’s a vet of sorts, so she sometimes takes care of Gaea. Only reason I put up with her. Bottom line, we’re not cool…
Again, it’s only barely, tangentially related to your situation. I, in no way, mean to minimize what you’re saying with my weaksauce issues. Still, if someone told me to get over it, or, even worse to just get along, I’d have had some pretty savage words with em ?
Besides, “worse stuff happens”? There’s very little I can imagine being more difficult than what you’ve gone thru. That’s some grown ass man shit, and you’re younger than me! Strength, brother <3
Posting against all of my better judgment…
@Sinkable John
I tried to post last night but it didn’t go through. For what it’s worth, the people who can’t see past The Bad Thing would not be healthy for you to keep in your life. I know that it doesn’t lessen the pain to know that, but the best thing you can do is focus your energy on people who care about you.
@Axe
This. Unfortunately my in-laws believe it’s required to forgive as soon as an apology is issued, which makes things very difficult for me.
@ Axe
Varalys has been using her vast expertise in how people are represented in media to assist me with something. She introduced me to an amazing comic character called Amanda Waller. In her original incarnation she was wonderful. She was completely plausible in the role she was meant to have. Oh, and she also happened to be a middle aged larger black lady.
Then she got mainstream. And, purely coincidentally no doubt, she suddenly got younger, smaller and just a little bit less black.
And maybe it’s because I’ve been pondering on that recently that my first thought when I saw your comment was “Well that’ll be so Ben Affleck can play him in the movie”
@kupo
I remember them. I can’t imagine… <3
@Alan
They ruined Etta Candy decades before they even got to The Wall. The whole point of her character was body positivity (granted it was the 40s, so it wasn't perfect). They made her thin in the 60s (even going so far as to have her in a anorexia storyline). But it's OK, cos they made her black in '11! See, they care about diversity! *groan*
Wall and Etta are fat again (both black), so I guess they learned…
Funny, but sadly a little believable. Luckily for everyone, Mike Colter:
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RirPt_XUt_0/VgZaIhNO9AI/AAAAAAAADms/0368sILZLWQ/s400/luke-cage-01.jpg
is playing Luke Cage in the show ?
Who’s the guy on the right? He would make a brilliant Judge Dredd!
@Alan
Frankie Faison. You may remember him as the orderly from Silence of the Lambs:
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_eHkTwd4aRic/S5KOkotcgwI/AAAAAAAATQQ/WplAqP8-2lc/s320/the-silence-of-the-lambs-anthony-hopkins-and-frank1.jpg
He’s playing Pops, the owner of a barbershop in Harlem. Generally upstanding member of the community
@ Axe
Ah right. Incidentally he’s also in the rather excellent Manhunter (the first Lector film)
I do love how we are refusing to let this thread die a natural death 🙂
@ John
I feel as though I’ve been monopolising you lately, so I’ll try to stop calling on your attention.
Axe and kupo are both right on point (as usual).
There are some times when “worse things could be happening” is actually useful, but your situation is not one of them. Trivial examples – when my son or I get a bit too whiny, the other will say “first world problems!” as a reminder that the wifi cutting out or the toast getting burnt or the new anime episode not out as promised (etc. etc.) are really not the end of the world. I’m sure a lot of people do this.
Another one: for the next few weeks I have to start work much earlier than usual; getting up at dawn and travelling by train and bus for 2.5 hours … but, this is because I’m taking over a colleague’s class as she’s undergoing treatment for breast cancer. So you can be damn sure I’ll not be whining about my early starts!
But in other cases, like yours (and I’m thinking of your ordeals with mental health professionals too), saying that worse things can happen is fucking insulting, and it denies your pain. In order to ever move on (or just away), we need to be able to inhabit the pain first. Sure, worse things could happen to you – but so what? These things did happen to you so they are what you have to live with, not some hypothetical.
I get so mad when this kind of thing happens! John, you take care of yourself and as kupo said, focus on the people who actually do see you as a worthwhile person.
Moar backspacing, editing, wiping everything then restarting… Meh.
@Axe, kupo
I don’t think “weak issues” are a thing to be honest. I mean it all depends on how it affects you. Things hurt for a reason, so if it hurts then it’s just as valid as anything else, I think.
Besides, there’s this weird thing going on, where that wasn’t the worst thing that happened to me, yet it’s the one that hurts the most. I can think of a few things that are “objectively” worse (damn I hate that word), but if I could go back and change just one thing, I wouldn’t even hesitate. So no, there aren’t “weaker” issues. I hope it gets better for you though. Not gonna tell you it takes time or crap like that, I just hope something happens that makes things better instead.
@kupo
Yeah I wrote three long paragraphs… but eventually shied away. Public internetz and all that. Point is… I remember who these people are – they forgot who I am, though. Most of the crap that’s going on is due to what happened after the abortion. Kind of a mix of weird shit that got blamed on me for no real reason and a hell of a rumor mill fueled by others – among which I suspect stands my father.
So all in all, I can’t really blame them. And they were some of the most amazing people I’ve ever known, that’s why I miss them. And I think somewhere deep down I just can’t believe it’s definitely over and there’s nothing to do about it. That’s probably why I still dream about it. Incidentally, this is what I’m listening to right now. Weirdly fitting titles and all.
@Axe again
Watch me.
@ Axe
You’ve got me all nostalgic now. I used to live next to a barbers called “Dad’s”. They did ‘Afro, Carribean, and Euro Hair’. I think I was the Euro. It was a great place to chill on a Saturday. That was market day on the street. So you could grab some food from one of the stalls and just gas the day away. Sometimes my hair was almost longer by the time I left than when I came in. You could also watch the world’s cheatiest games of dominoes (seriously, the guys might as well have been using semaphore)
After a while I got promoted so Dad himself cut my hair (also “call me Dad”). Daft as it sounds I felt really chuffed. It was like getting your platinum membership. Dad was really old school. Even though my style has always been once over with a straight razor and a bit of a polish, he still dusted me down with that slightly scented powder that only seems to exist in traditional barber shops.
There was also a women’s bit in the back. No man had ever been through that door! Not sure what went on in there but it involved a lot of laughing.
@Mish
I’m so sorry about your brother’s situation. Hugs or hug alternatives to you, your brother, and the rest of your family.
You addressed your remark to Sinkable John, but it resonated for me. Although my late brother, who was nonneurotypical, didn’t end up in prison, he took the wrong road, repeatedly.
And that’s because our father actively, continually, maliciously destroyed his sense of self and self-worth.
My father treated his entire family the same way, but my late brother was less able to endure it.
Without patriarchy, my father couldn’t have carried out his mission of destruction. And my brother would no doubt still be alive.
@Sinkable John, @Axecalibur
In my experience, people who advise others just to “get over” trauma, have difficulty themselves with processing trauma — they tend to stuff it down and want you to do the same.
Sending you hugs or alternatives to hugs.
@Alan
Not daft at all. I know someone who chatted a lot with his local Palestinian-American grocer and was totally jazzed when he got to sit behind the counter with him.
Aaaand that’s why I need to remember to refresh before posting, especially when I take an hour or so trying to write something.
@Mish
Nah, ’tis all good, plus I feel better now thanks to you all 🙂
I see what you mean regarding “it could be worse”. Incidentally “first world problems !” is a favorite rant of some anti-feminists… But then that means out of seven billion people or so, only one has any right to complain – and no one even knows who that would be.
@Kat
I’m sorry about your brother 🙁
All of the hugs or alternatives to you.
@John
Hugs. It sounds like you’re grieving in a manner, which is understandable. Losing people you care about is hard.
Here’s a silly kitty to cheer you up. 🙂
http://i.imgur.com/D8tchZv.jpg
@ Kat
That’s heartbreaking. Your poor brother. Thank you for posting – your comments are always so beautiful and intelligent (when they’re not scathingly funny and intelligent!).
@ John
Yes, I know how some peeps in the manosphere like to use “first-world problems” as a stick to beat western feminists with (usually just before they start discussing cargo shorts or Pokemon Go…). The kid and I just use it as a private reminder that we have it pretty good these days 🙂
ETA
@kupo – grieving, yes.
And that kitty is brilliant!
@kupo
Thank yous. This is the best kitty.
@Mish
Oh sorry I wasn’t clear (I never am, am I). I mean I got that :p
I meant there’s legitimate ways to say it, like yours, and less legitimate ones, like theirs. And like the people who keep saying that “others have it worse and you don’t hear them complain” (protip, guy : you would hear them complain if you listened).
Right now my first world problem is that I lost my Terraria save files along with my old hard drive and now that I’ve restarted, RNGesus isn’t too kind to me. At least I’m staying occupied and it keeps my brains busy. (I’m willing to trade my hypothetical first born for a lava charm. Should I take this to Craigslist ?)
RNGesus is a jerk.
@Mish
To get a tiny bit philosophical, there’s no such thing. This thread forever 🙂
@John
Nah, I’m fine. So long as my fuzzy friend gets her medicines and check ups, I’m good! She matters more. Plus, my emotions are pretty dull by now. Probably not all that healthy, but it helps! And thanks 🙂
Speaking of back in time. My life has no soul crushing events in it. I’m a ‘death by 1000 cuts’ type. I’m only on like 340 or so (*inward chuckle*). I can remember those cuts. Vividly. And I know what moment I could go back to and do a lot of good for myself. Tap my 17 year old self on the shoulder and keep him on track…
I won’t go too much into the story, but someone I sorta knew in high school did something bad to someone else I knew in high school. They were younger, and I’d already graduated. Anytime I think of going back and changing things, I realize they (both) need my help more than I do. Don’t know why I’m telling this… (virtue signal virtue signal ?)
@Alan
This is for you:
http://az831865.vo.msecnd.net/asset/635902177448863952/img/card-black-front.png
Don’t lose it, we don’t just hand these out to every ‘Euro’. And don’t worry, we’ll fix the name 🙂
@Kat
Sorry about your bruh, and I’m glad you survived <3
You … you play Terraria?
I’ve, um, been known to give my son totally illegitimate days off school because we were in the middle of building the bestest settlement, or were about to go hardmode.
Speaking of responsibility, or lack thereof, I must go and play at being an adult (i.e. marking assignments).
This thread is incredible and very humbling. Thanks, all <3 <3
@kupo
“Think not that I am come to send fat loot on Earth : I came not to send what you need, but a shitload of useless crap.”
@Axe
Why not go with your 4 yr old self instead ? Efficiency ! But more seriously, I get where you’re coming from. It’s harder to watch others go to hell than to do it yourself.
Sometimes I daydream about restarting my whole life with all the knowledge I have now. I suspect my gamer mindset might be the reason why I even think about that. No lottery numbers though. And I’d have to resist the urge to “write” other people’s awesome songs or books before they do.
@Mish
I laughed a lot more than I really should, considering this is totally the reason why I should never have kids. All those sick days, I’d end up on trial for bad parenting.
My settlement is a mixture of fugly-and-barely-functional, and some stuff that I’m actually proud of. Nothing new here… Eventually I’ll move everything to a new location and really put my mind to building something cool.
OMG, you guys. Look! http://cat-cosplay.tumblr.com
@John
4 year old Axe’s mom had just returned from a long hustle, he was moving 800 miles away, and he wouldn’t see his dad again for 14 years. He had enough on his plate* 🙂
Honestly, I think starting over might be bad for me. I didn’t stay on track at 17. Or 14. Or 9. But that made me who I am. And I think I’m a slightly better person for it
Nope, I’m stealing whole careers! What? You thought I had scruples? ?
@kupo
Cat Bucky remembers all of them *squeals and melts into goo*
I normally hate aminals in clothes, but this too adorable
…
*She got a great job, I’ll never quite like where I live as much as my real home, and, as cool as my dad is, him not being around was never any kinda loss. A lot for a child regardless…
@Alan
They were discussing the man-o-sphere.
Someone would say something like, “Man, oh, manospherians, what a whine!”*
Peals of laughter.
*Apologies to Manischewitz wine.
http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2016/04/22/475142479/man-oh-manichewitz-when-the-jewish-wine-was-big-with-gentiles-too
Personally, I like restricting “first world problems” to maladies actually unique to the first world. Like, everyone’s annoyed by burned food and so on – those aren’t signs of excessive privilege; they’re unifying human experiences! So first world problems should be “Oh, bother, a change of government has reduced the profitability of my colonial investments.”
@ Diptych
Ah, I think I get you! Something like:
“Ermergerd, I had to pay 1.5% tax last financial year!” *sob*
Or, or, a real life actually true example:
A guy who was buying a multi-million dollar house found to his dismay that the driveway was too low for his Ferrari, so he became embroiled in a battle with the developers to have the driveway altered.
Those kind of problems? 🙂