So, you’ve heard about the Hillary Body Double thing, right?
If not, basically what happened is that some nitwit Trump supporters noticed that Hillary Clinton looked a bit thinner than usual at a photo-op yesterday several hours after she so famously fainted at the 9/11 memorial.
They concluded, naturally, that this was a counterfeit Hillary who just happens to look exactly like Hillary, but with different earrings and a somewhat smaller butt than they remember. And so the hashtag #HillarysBodyDouble started trending earlier today.
This is getting serious now #HillarysBodyDouble pic.twitter.com/FpTuxTw82I
— Eric Spracklen🇺🇸 (@EricSpracklen) September 12, 2016
https://twitter.com/AltRight_News/status/775346651133276160
It didn’t take long before some of the slightly-more-reality-based members of Trump’s fanbase noticed that a lot of people were, well, kind of making fun of the hashtag. Like so:
https://twitter.com/JustinTaylorBE/status/775344725976952832
https://twitter.com/MikeWehner/status/775361876980969472
And so a new conspiracy theory was born, claiming that the Hillary body double conspiracy theory was itself a conspiracy — a “false flag” by evil leftists to make alt-rightists and other Trump fans look ridiculous.
This new improved conspiracy theory is being promulgated by such icons of credibility as …
This dude who works for Alex Jones:
The #HillarysBodyDouble narrative was probably started by the Clinton campaign to discredit genuine questions about her health.
— Paul Joseph Watson (@PrisonPlanet) September 12, 2016
This alt-rightist:
https://twitter.com/AltRightToday/status/775312789267152896
Whoever this is:
#HillarysBodyDouble is a false flag from the liberals to discredit the alt-right. Don't fall for it guys!
— Monix (@iMonix) September 12, 2016
This line of argument might be a teensy bit more persuasive had there not been quite so many obviously sincere alt-rightists and Trump fans — all with long histories of pro-Trump tweets, many with thousands if not tens of thousands of followers — declaring that the real Hillary had been replaced by a fake. Seriously, click through to any of these accounts and tell me that they’re “false flags.”
https://twitter.com/MissLizzyNJ/status/775298815289163776
https://twitter.com/nia4_trump/status/775404778264391680
https://twitter.com/trump2016fan/status/775311119485243393
https://twitter.com/ImagineAnna/status/775450722850770944
https://twitter.com/Billhic02785574/status/775304315300962304
https://twitter.com/SouthLoneStar/status/775404319315197952
Everyone missed most obvious faux-pas in photos. HER hair is now parted on the OTHER side. Now THAT'S strange. WTF. https://t.co/7a76bQEg8V
— EvermoreNews (@EvermoreNews) September 12, 2016
Yes, DeplorableCherokee dude, the fact that her hair is parted on the other side, assuming one of the pics isn’t accidentally reversed, clearly proves that this ISN’T HILLARY!!!111!
https://twitter.com/jwd1967/status/775334420790247424
Yes, Jesus dude, the fact that she was wearing different earrings surely proves that she has been replaced by a WHOLE OTHER PERSON!
Meanwhile, others in the Trump camp, while not quite willing to endorse the conspiracy theory outright, were certainly willing enough to indulge those who had, by “asking questions” about, for example, the fact that Hillary wasn’t completely surrounded by secret service officers while leaving her daughter’s apartment yesterday.
https://twitter.com/Ricky_Vaughn99/status/775343783709855744
https://twitter.com/Grummz/status/775356978482679808
JUST ASKING QUESTIONS!
Our old friend Theodore Beale (“Vox Day”) declared in a blog post today that
I’m not saying that the latest “Hillary Clinton” appearance was a body double, but something looks a bit different about the miraculously recovered version. …To be honest, something about the shape of the woman’s body immediately struck me as “off”. Precisely what, I don’t know, but my immediate subconscious reaction was “who is that?” She’s a little too structurally squatty, as opposed to merely overweight like Hillary.
The right-wing Daily Caller, meanwhile, offered the conspiracy theorists this bit of clickbait:
#HillarysBodyDouble — Here Are 10 Women Who Look EXACTLY Like Hillary Clintonhttps://t.co/yPLtCURSYt pic.twitter.com/HgNNIAEqyg
— Daily Caller (@DailyCaller) September 12, 2016
The best explanation of Hillary’s appearance at the now infamous photo op came from someone who is very definitely not an alt-rightist:
https://twitter.com/caulkthewagon/status/775437408733192192
But my favorite post in the #HillarysBodyDouble hashtag has to be this one from a slightly miffed 9/11 Truther
https://twitter.com/SemperLiber9/status/775401585073614849
We live in very weird times.
Oh for fuck’s sake !
Here’s one for you, alt-righters : Hillary is actually Tupac Shakur.
I think Hillary is actually Tupac’s hologram.
Jet fuel can’t melt neck wrinkles !
http://pre00.deviantart.net/f719/th/pre/i/2011/341/d/8/fluttershy___trying_not_to_laugh_by_nyax-d4i967f.png
I do find the conspiracist mindset really fascinating (and I have some empathy towards it, too) – the world doesn’t make sense, so people try and craft a vision of the world that makes sense to them. I think that for a lot of these folks, a world where ‘Hillary Clinton’ is some sort of hoax – played on the public by political and media elites – is much more sensible than a world where a woman might actually be elected president of the US.
Scildfreja is a false-flag operation as part of a conspiracy which aims at converting the NWO to MLP.
Actually, Tupac was killed by a mysterious character called “Suge Knight”, who seems to have dropped off the face of the planet after the shooting. Tupac was killed in 1996, and the following year Bill Clinton got rid of his wife at the time, Monica Lewinsky, by getting impeached. Out of nowhere, “Hillary” appeared and became Bill’s new wife, bearing remarkable similarities to Suge Knight. The two are (allegedly) almost exactly the same age (within 20 years), same height (give or take a foot), etc. She only had to lose about half her body weight before being able to assume her new “Hillary” persona.
The “Hillary lookalikes” are, in fact, former Suge Knight lookalikes who also “died” under mysterious circumstances (Big Pun, Buffy the Human Beatbox, DJ Screw, Professor X, Nate Dogg, Big Bank Hank, Phife Dawg, Kimbo Slice, etc).
It’s almost like they don’t understand how different photo angles, changing clothes, and fucking hairbrushes work. Or possible photo-mirroring.
I told my roommate of this conspiracy of body doubles (and the conspiracy that involves the conspiracy), and he made a good point: If she gets impeached (and no doubt that Trumpers would love it if she would be) does it count if we impeach her body double??? Can she be impeached if she has an army of body doubles willing to take the fall for her?!
If Hillary is really human, then how come NASA FOUND HER ON MARS½½½½½½
http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1978038/images/o-MARS-LADY-facebook.jpg
@PI
“We’ve got her this time… FUCK, it’s another god damn body double!”
I just parted my hair on the other side so the government can’t control my thoughts.
I wear it in a knot* against the aliens, since they use different kinds of chemtrails.
ETA : *probably not what it’s called. I don’t engrish so well, partly because I’m an undercover Jewish agent.
No wonder these dorks get so upset about women wearing makeup – they think if someone changes their jewellery, they become a completely different person.
Wait, the alt-right is only catching onto this now? Everybody knows that Hillary’s been using body-doubles ever since her Gulenist coup attempt on Bill failed in 1999, and he had her placed in a secret FEMA camp within a secret CIA prison within Guantanamo Bay, from where she inside-jobbed 9/11 and continues to influence politics to this very day using an ingenious messaging system consisting of two refrigerator magnets and a shiv.
It’s a very good job. Obviously they went to the people who did Paul McCartney’s double for the Beatles.
Proof? Any single photo with Hillary and Paul’s replacement in it. They don’t even need to be next to each other.
OMG – they’ve figured out that women are born with earrings already attached, and we can’t change them, ever!
Who told?
@PI:
If there’s one thing Spaceballs has taught me, it’s that stunt doubles don’t count.
I’m surprised they think they need help to look bad.
You may mean a bun.
These people are going to have aneurysms when she wins.
#ScildfrejasBodyDouble
#TheGreatAndPowerfulTrixiesGrandReplaceAllWHTMCommentorsWithPoniesForWorldDominationScheme
@ Sinkable John: But…but…she can’t be Tupac Shakur; she’s supposed to be one of those shape-shifting lizard-people alien overlords who works for the Illuminati or something. (Or was it the NWO? I forget. Maybe I need a new tin-foil hat, in case the mind control’s starting to work.)
@ IP: Maybe one of her body doubles is really Suge Knight, and another is the one in that picture of rocks on Mars. It’s not like we’d know if any one of the body doubles was really her–right?
While we’re on the subject: I’ve got a conspiracy theory involving the sentient creature on top of Donald Trump’s head, if anyone’s interested. I just don’t have a Twitter hashtag to promote it.
ETA: this MLP thing is awesome. Thanks, Scildfreja.
@Podkayne
Why thank you.
Incidentally, I sell hats artfully made of only top-quality tinfoil and crystals that protect you from vaccine-induced aneurysms. They also prevent HAARP from divorce-raping you and the Elders of Zion from melting jet fuel.
Only 199.99USD.
WAKE UP SHEEPLE
Why won’t Donald Trump deny that his hair is made of capellini spaghetti? And why does he order a big bowl of spaghetti for breakfast every morning? #SpaghettiGate
http://pre13.deviantart.net/7665/th/pre/i/2015/123/7/a/two_v4_fluttershys_by_lazyperson202-d8s1e0d.png