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Looking for love with all the wrong racists: Neo-Nazis offer dating tips

The giant Nazi flag is a dead giveaway
The giant Nazi flag is a dead giveaway

Say what you want about the tenets of Internet Nazism, at least it offers lovelorn white supremacists handy dating advice.

In yesterday’s edition of Radio Aryan’s Daily Traditionalist show, beardy white supremacist/Trump superfan Matthew Heimbach and guest Sven Longshanks discussed Sven’s attendance at a meeting of one of the Daily Stormer’s new, ahem, “book clubs,” designed to provide really really racist dudes with camaraderie, weapons training, and dating advice.

According to the summary of the show on the Radio Aryan website, the two suggested that fellow white supremacist dudes looking for white love do so in gruppens groups:

Women are … attracted to men in groups that are not competing among each other but co-operating with each other. They feel at ease in a situation like this and are far more likely to talk to a group of affable men than they are to individuals that look like they are out on the pull and conspicuously trying to impress women.

Also, maybe grow a beard?

The subject of masculinity comes up and the White man’s ability to grow a luxurious beard. According to early racial science the original Negro and Chinaman were unable to grow beards and the fact that the White man could, showed that our race was more mature and fully grown than the others. The fact that some Negroes now have beards shows that they are mulattoes. Matt encourages men to grow well-kept beards as a sign of being anti-feminist, as feminists hate them.

So ladies, if you find yourself being chatted up at the local watering hole by a weirdly affable group of beardymen in matching brown shirts, well, they probably listen to Radio Aryan.

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Rabbitwink
Rabbitwink
8 years ago

They also don’t seem to mention the enbearded Sikhs, Muslims, secular middle easterners, etc. whom they don’t seem overly fond of. I mean, if this beard theory is right they better look at their competition. (Ugh)

Pretty Pink Punani Princess
Pretty Pink Punani Princess
8 years ago

Poor little racists.

I guess out of all the PUA’s, MGTOWs, and MRA, they are the most eligible for women to get the fuck out of dodge the second they show their true colors. It’s so hard for them to find a ‘good’ girl for them these days. I suppose ‘good girls’ find no objection to being pumped and dumped, married off to Mr. Crazy Eyes, beat into submission with the Bible and with fists and have children in a house of sheer racial and female hatred.

They can’t force us into marriages anymore, so they’ll try anything to spread that seed. Though the rise of women being found starved, drugged and beaten in sex dungeons and the kidnapper saying it was ‘all part of the love games’ says a lot.

No one with an ounce of decency would dream of hanging around these cooks. But yes… let us blame it on the ‘feminist society’. Well that’s good. Being taught to distance yourself from sociopathic, illogical losers who feels blacks and asians can’t grow full beards without the almighty white blood…. I’d say that’s a good thing.

They’re finding it harder to find a ‘suitable mate’…. even a pump and dump. So they’ll follow all these ‘chick magnet’ rules and the chicks will move farther away from them. They’ll keep asking ‘what they’re doing wrong’, never seeing the real problem.

Oh well… they can always marry their first cousin or half sister like they’ve been doing for a while. Keep that stupidity pure, after all.

ColeYote
ColeYote
8 years ago

According to early racial science the original Negro and Chinaman were unable to grow beards and the fact that the White man could, showed that our race was more mature and fully grown than the others. The fact that some Negroes now have beards shows that they are mulattoes.

Yes, because early racial science has been so historically reliable. But I guess that would explain why people from Africa today can’t grow facial hair. Isn’t that right Gervinho?comment image

Er, damn, uh… Samuel Eto’o?comment image

Crap, Alex Song?
http://images.performgroup.com/di/library/omnisport/6b/4d/alexsong_1pfvqrryz0nt81vjnsr9zvoytm.jpg

Abedi Pele?
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kNqgNjOoby0/T6PdFoAByCI/AAAAAAAAYB8/UfopM1Lq17o/s1600/Abedi+PELE+Panini+Olympique+Lyonnais+1994.png

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
8 years ago

Damn you, feminists !

First you came for the cargo shorts.

Now you come for the beards.

Where the hell am I gonna keep my stuff now ?

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
8 years ago

‘Gruppens’ is hilarious. It’s like ‘geeses’

Fuck off, Nazis! I won’t let you ruin beards for me. My face, and indeed neck, fur is glorious. Now, if you’ll excuse my black ass, I’ve got supper to prepare. Toodles!
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(Chiwetel knows)

@Oogly

I thought being a dude meant I didn’t have to deal with mansplaining in race form

I humbly welcome you to the Ignorant Minority Club. We don’t do much, smarter people than you will let ya know how to be appropriately Asian. Easier on your feeble brain that way
(Real talk tho, that shit’s the worst… *pats back reassuringly*)

Garen Truscott
8 years ago

“According to [an idea I plucked from my butt] the original Negro and Chinaman were unable to grow beards and the fact that the White man could, showed that our race was more mature and fully grown than the others.”

ColeYote
ColeYote
8 years ago

Matt encourages men to grow well-kept beards as a sign of being anti-feminist, as feminists hate them.

Ah, shit, here I thought my gay ass liked beards. Guess I’d better stop hanging around bears.

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
8 years ago

So now phylogeny recapitulates ontogeny? And only the white race has achieved racial puberty?

Maybe that accounts for all the pouting, sulking, and cries of “It’s not faaaair!” and “You never give me ANYTHING!” and “You’ll be sorry when I’m gone!” that we hear coming from certain quarters.

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
8 years ago

Unrelated to the original topic, but I wanted to share this. It’s a ten minute interview with a woman living in Flint, Michigan. Since it’s fallen off of the radar of national news, things have not changed. Here’s some more information.

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
8 years ago

@Axe
Thank you for that.
@Scildfreja
We’re the richest country but we can’t take care of our own citizens. The fact that this is still happening in the US is horrific on multiple levels, and that’s not mentioning the potential crisis in other areas at risk in the US.

Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko, Regicidal Beast-of-Burden
8 years ago

By the way, is there some reasoning behind this ?

According to early racial science the original Negro and Chinaman were unable to grow beards and the fact that the White man could, showed that our race was more mature and fully grown than the others.

I mean, some reasoning that isn’t the nazi equivalent of that kid in school flaunting his “mustache”.

Also, how’s that for signs of maturity : I can’t shave because of a protruding scar under my shin, that I earned at age 6 when I slipped in a bathtub and cracked my jaw open. My beard is a reminder of an important life lesson, one that is normally only given in coming-of-age ceremonies and also possibly frat houses : do not stand up in the fucking bathtub.

Falconer
Falconer
8 years ago

Well, I’m glad to know that the roving packs of droogs cornering single women in the mall are only Nazis if none of them have touched a razor in weeks.

EDIT: Beloved brings up a good point: Do these guys know how the actual Nazis treated people who valued full beards?

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
8 years ago

@Falconer
Exception to the rule, always count on that line of thinking for those who’d be ousted by their group. In this iteration “yes they brutalize any person with beards because they were Jewish/Muslim but since we’re white they won’t treat us like them.”

Imaginary Petal
Imaginary Petal
8 years ago

Dancehall icon Don Carlos will be devastated to learn he can’t grow a beard.
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dlouwe
dlouwe
8 years ago

@Scildfreja

It makes me really happy that you’ve brought back the Fluttershy reactions. This one actually made me laugh out loud.

Viscaria
Viscaria
8 years ago

Women are … attracted to men in groups that are not competing among each other but co-operating with each other.

That doesn’t sound very Alpha to me. Aren’t you guys supposed to attract us by out doing each other at skyscrapers building and shit?

calmdown
calmdown
8 years ago

Women are … attracted to men in groups that are not competing among each other but co-operating with each other

Women are mostly commie SJWs, so of course! /s

This would actually be true for me if they were like, producing quality theater or solving advanced equations or curing cancer, but we all know that’s not what he’s talking about here. 🙁

I would also want them to co-operate with diverse kinds of people including women to really find it attractive, so, I guess this wouldn’t ever work on me ( or like %98 of the women in the world).

Also, wasn’t there another WHTM article with another nazi giving similar “advice?” I swear this is the 2nd time I’ve heard a reference to use of the “threatening gang” tactic to attract women. I mean, what the actual fuck guys.

Ooglyboggles
Ooglyboggles
8 years ago

@calmdown
Yeah there was another article here about them giving the same advice of group up. I figured that at this point from years of the internet radicalizing these groups some of them are going to fall back to street gang mentalities.

calmdown
calmdown
8 years ago

It isn’t a very Alpha strategy. I imagine nazis are so scared to be away from a constant re-enforcement of their beliefs that they need their nazi bros around at all times to maintain the echo chamber. They’ll also need a shoulder or ten to cry on when they get rejected by most of the women they approach when they find out that they are, y’know, literal fucking NAZIS. Then they can just write them all off as decadent sluts or whatever and feel better.

Bryce
Bryce
8 years ago

I’m having trouble following their evo-psych reasoning on white men with beards being a sign of higher developmental evolution than other more ethnic groups – it seems like having more hair would mean you were closer to the animals and thus less evolved, according to their usual logical cartwheels

Odd isn’t it, particularly since a lot of white supremacist groups draw upon garbage scientific racism theory from the likes of Philippe Rushton (who argued for an inverse relationship between average testosterone levels and IQ in populations) . Going by this you would think a sparse beard and little body hair would be a sign of being more evolved, not less.

Lea
Lea
8 years ago

I will give this bit of advice to people who kiss beard havers:

If the beard haver is sweaty, make sure they squeegee the beard in a downward motion with their hand prior to kissing them. Otherwise, you are pressing your face into a sweat sponge and you will likely regret it.

Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
8 years ago

@dlouwe, I missed them too! I’m lad to bring them back.

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Scildfreja Unnýðnes
Scildfreja Unnýðnes
8 years ago

More unrelated news – sorry about that, but, wow, this one.

The world’s largest union action in history just happened last Friday. 180 million workers in India went on strike to oppose recent announcements of privatization from the Indian government.

Holy noodle. This is amazing. Go India!

Ray of Rays
Ray of Rays
8 years ago

According to early racial science the original Negro and Chinaman were unable to grow beards

Now the question becomes…why didn’t Guan Yu spontaneously manifest from heaven and stab this man?

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Bina
8 years ago

According to early racial science the original Negro and Chinaman were unable to grow beards and the fact that the White man could

Fu Manchu’s mustache and Frederick Douglass’s big full beard would like a word with your “early racial science”, sir.

Unfortunately, “early racial science” is an oxymoron, not a thing, so I guess all that non-white facial hair will just have to converse with itself. Much like you barely-sentient hairballs do, in other words.