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Men Going Their Own Way are now wearing cargo shorts “as a form of protest”

Dressed to unimpress

So cargo shorts, a staple of casual menswear since the 1990s, are going out of style like, well, they’re going out of style.

The anti-cargo shorts backlash, many years in the making, kicked into high gear after the Wall Street Journal reported last month that increasing numbers of women have started resorting to drastic tactics to stop the dudes in their lives from wearing these new fashion no-nos. One man told the WSJ that his wife had secretly disposed of more than a dozen pairs of his over the years; another only wears them around the house when his wife is away, in what has become an act of “disobedien[ce] in my marriage.”

Within a few days the media was filled with denunciations of the (really quite comfortable) shorts. “Dear Men, Please Stop Wearing Cargo Shorts,” Buzzfeed urged, while Business Insider declared that cargo shorts are “the single worst item a man can wear in the summer.”

Really? Worse than these?

Are these really better than cargo shorts?
Are these really better than cargo shorts?

Now some Men Going Their Own Way have adopted the shorts as a way to stick it to women.

“I think of cargo shorts as a form of protest now,” a MGTOW called Tyler_Gatsby declared in a recent post on the MGTOW subreddit.

I wear them with pride. And with all that dick moving room, it almost feels like it’s flipping them off sometimes.

While it was news to many in Mr. Gatsby’s audience that a lot of people really hate cargo shorts, other Reddit MGTOWs reported that they too were wearing the shorts as an act of defiance against giant-pocket-hating feminazi gynocrats, or something.

“From now on, rebrand them as ‘Tactical Shorts,'” one commenter suggested. “It will piss off the Special Snoflakes to no end….”

Another reported that he’d been wearing the hell out of cargo shorts as soon as he discovered that a lot of women hate them.

I wore all mine until they fell apart, and wore them even more often once the fashion police took aim at them. Now I can’t buy any new ones these things were literally purged from existence by manginas and women.

Others went even further. Several confessed their love for “the ones with the zipped trousers – trousers and shorts in one!” And one bold fellow suggested escalating the protest:

Let’s take it a step further: denim cargo shorts.

The horror.

As for why women hate cargo shorts, most Reddit MGTOWs seem to agree it’s because women don’t like anything that is useful. And because the lustful ladies like staring at men’s butts.

“It does come down to something fundamental between men and women,” wrote someone calling themselves feedmecarrots.

Men love cargo shorts because they are functional. Women hate them because they do not enhance a man’s form.

Pfthewall lamented the evil hypocrisy of these butt-loving women:

You mean women get pissed when it is difficult for them to ogle men, all the while they complain about men ogling them?

Linux_Guy91, meanwhile, let loose with an angry rant centered abound his need to store phone chargers on his person.

Any chick who disses cargo shorts is ignorant as f*ck. I’ve had stares in the past from girls who would bug out when their phone was low on battery but didn’t have a charger on them because they couldn’t carry it in their tight pockets or wrist purse thing. My phone gets low, I pull out my charger and i’m good.

And these pocket-laden shorts come in especially handy when riding roller coasters.

Not to mention they’re awesome for when you don’t want to keep your wallet in your back pocket or if they have zipper pockets perfect for storing stuff if you like roller coasters. Functional > fashionable.

Duly noted.

In all my years of wearing cargo shorts, I think I’ve made use of the big pockets like once.

I still haven’t given my cargo shorts up, but I think I’ll have to now that they’ve gotten themselves drenched in the stench of MGTOW.

NOTE: Just FYI, the dudes in the top photo don’t have anything to do with the MGTOW subreddit post; the pic has been floating around the internet forever and seemed apropos

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Garen Truscott
Garen Truscott
4 years ago

You know guys, feminism (you know, the monolithic conspiracy ruining your life) HATES it when you treat women with respect for reasons that only make sense if you were in on the last meeting.

Yeah… hates it.

Karalora
Karalora
4 years ago

these things were literally purged from existence by manginas and women.

What did I buy a pair of in downtown L.A. just the day before yesterday, then?

GenJones
GenJones
4 years ago

Sure, they’re not made to flatter. Now, as a desert rat, my fashion sense might be dubious from time to time, but fuck, do I love me some cargo shorts! And since I love wearing them with my standard issue femanarchist combat boots, I’m immediately going to start referring to them as tactical shorts. I’ll get all my tomboy feminist friends to start saying it too.

I’ma get girl cooties all over your thing, guys. Alllllllll up in it.

Handsome "Punkle Stan" Jack

Wait, you’re telling me I couldn’t find cargo shorts because they’re going out of style? Fucking hell, man.

insert_funny
4 years ago

What did I buy a pair of in downtown L.A. just the day before yesterday, then?

Because the store you purchased them from is run by MGTOWs intent on preserving them from the evil hands of the gynocracy, or some crap. Better check to see if the cargo pockets are full of red pills.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

Cargo shorts going out of style. An important men’s rights issue. This isn’t a petty first world problem of the sort that feminists are concerned with.

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
4 years ago

Can we combine cargo shorts hate with pumpkin spice hate to free up some time in meme-makers’ lives?

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

Cargo shorts are alive and well in the Pacific Northwest, but we consider socks with sandals and flannel to be high fashion and our business casual dress codes include jeans and t-shirts.

Tara the Antisocial Social Worker
Tara the Antisocial Social Worker
4 years ago

Yes, guys, it sure is unpleasant having someone else impose their opinion on what you should wear or how you should look in general. Think they can apply that lesson to their own behavior toward women?

And every time I see the slogan about “make me a sandwich,” I think of a certain Twilight Zone episode….

Valkyrie_Pleasant
Valkyrie_Pleasant
4 years ago

I find it kinda funny that these ‘protests’, are all things nobody notices until they’re told. Almost like being an MGTOW is something to be ashamed of or something.

macomeau
macomeau
4 years ago

Some observations:

a) Cargo shorts aren’t that functional. The cargo pockets are too far down on the leg and that makes accessing them cumbersome, especially when moving.

2) If you really have that much stuff to carry, get a bag. It’s way more functional. I have a pretty great messenger bag that I carry my work stuff in.

iii) Seriously, how much stuff do you carry in your pockets? I have my phone, my wallet and my keys. I have a whole back pocket that I already don’t use! Why would I need more?

Part the fourth) Cargo shorts don’t have to be unflattering. The place I work actually had some slim cargo shorts this summer; if you wanted to try to look good and keep your precious, useless pockets.

Honestly though, if you want to reject the vagaries of fashion, fine. Do it. I don’t like having a beard, so I won’t have one, no matter how “in” they ever are. If you like cargo shorts, wear cargo shorts. There is no grand feminist conspiracy to rail against here.

Not that that’s ever stopped them before.

As always, MGTOW, just go.

http://lookat.world/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/c-181718fada6777ef15092888f0422f68.gif

Karl
Karl
4 years ago

“MGTOWs seem to agree it’s because women don’t like anything that is useful. And because the lustful ladies like staring at men’s butts.”</blockquote.

Wait – why would women want to stare at men's butts when they only care about money? I was informed by MGTOWs that women don't care about sex at all!

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
4 years ago

… I’m guessing that this anti-shorts thing hasn’t made it to Australia yet? Because cargo shorts are second only to half-empty beer cans when it comes to the standard Aussie bloke’s outfit and I’ve never met a single person who cares either way.

This might be breaking new and unheard-of ground in overreacting over fucking nothing.

(But don’t forget, we‘re the outrage addicts…)

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
4 years ago

@ LindsayIrene: But I like pumpkin spice

@GenJones: I’m with you about the “tactical shorts”. I like cargo pants, so I’d probably like cargo shorts too. They’re comfortable and practical. Sign me up!

@David: Oh ok…that’s what it was. My own connection is having issues too.

Ashara Payne
Ashara Payne
4 years ago

They probably believe women hate cargo shorts as much as they hate piercings, tattoos and short, brightly-coloured hair on women, when in reality we don’t really care that much, on the whole.

Kobun37
Kobun37
4 years ago

Hey, I wear cargo shorts myself, and I’m female. I prefer the ones with regular pants pockets in the side and big pockets further down the front so I can keep all my paraphernalia in them when I go fishing. I also loathe the trend of women’s pants with no or so-tiny-they’re-unusable pockets. Not every woman wants to carry a bag.

In other news, I heard on the news that regressive, Trump-supporting harridan Phyllis Schlafly finally passed away at 92. Upon hearing said news I spontaneously broke out singing, “Ding dong the witch is dead.”

Scildfreja
Scildfreja
4 years ago

What exactly is “tactical” about cargo shorts? Do they turn into bombs? do they turn into guns?

Tessa
Tessa
4 years ago

Scildfreja:

What exactly is “tactical” about cargo shorts? Do they turn into bombs? do they turn into guns?

No but they can hold bombs and guns in their pockets! Or all sorts of useful stuff. I guess being able to carry stuff is tactical, but “cargo” is a much fitting descriptor.

I like cargo pants, too. Very useful. Stupid MGTOWs are going to ruin them by making them some kind of douche symbol.

Handsome "Punkle Stan" Jack

2) If you really have that much stuff to carry, get a bag. It’s way more functional. I have a pretty great messenger bag that I carry my work stuff in.

But then you have to remember the bag and not leave it in the middle of the store. :/

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
4 years ago

I can’t really opine on cargo shorts, since I only wear long pants, but I sure do like to wear cargo pants on the job (middle school custodian). The only problem is that sometimes I don’t always remember to empty all the pockets before throw them in the dirty laundry. I forget all about the fact that I was going to remount a pencil sharpener on Friday until I heard screws pinging around in the dryer this morning.

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
4 years ago

Re Phyllis Schlafly’s passing:

Rest in peace, Serena Joy. May your afterlife be the Republic of Gilead.

Diptych
Diptych
4 years ago

What exactly is “tactical” about cargo shorts? Do they turn into bombs? do they turn into guns?

They have rails where you can attach a scope, laser sight and underslung grenade launcher to your leg. Why have leg when you could have tactical leg?

Professor Snugglesworth
Professor Snugglesworth
4 years ago

What exactly is “tactical” about cargo shorts?

It puts me in mind of the TACTICAL-GRIP bar of soap that featured so prominently in the MasculinitySoFragile hash-tag. Seeing as how they missed the point of that mockery the first time around, there’s no sense trying to explain it to them again. It might even be a deliberate reference for all I can tell.

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
4 years ago

Hate cargo pants, hate shorts, hate cargo shorts. But I’m a dude! Am I part of the femiconspiracy too!? No more ‘tactical’ trousers for men, mwahahaha! Women can still wear em tho. I mean, women control everything, so of course they aren’t bound by the laws of fashion which govern us mere, mortal men

tim gueguen
4 years ago

Apparently the word hasn’t gotten around that women’s clothing often doesn’t have functional pockets. Either there are no pockets at all or the pockets are simply decorative and unable to hold anything.

I’ve never understood why people carry their wallets in their back pocket. I’m a front pocket guy.

Fishy Goat
Fishy Goat
4 years ago

I like cargo shorts and cargo pants. Guess I’m not a woman, then. *rolls eyes*

SpleenyBadger
SpleenyBadger
4 years ago

Re cargo shorts – my partner loves wearing them and and I honestly don’t care. He doesn’t tell me what to wear and I don’t tell him what to wear. Wait… if he tried to wear double-denim, we might have to have harsh words.

Re Phyllis Schlafly – one less narrow-minded, hard-line, hard-hearted Republican conservative in the world working to make other folks miserable? I consider that a win for humanity. Don’t rest in peace, Ms Schlafly.

Michael Brew
Michael Brew
4 years ago

Oh, I agree that it’s always frustrating when the media starts shaming people for their fashion choices. Why they think there’s some kind of feminist fiat against cargo shorts rather than a simple collection of gossipy media types doing what they do and making fun of acceptable targets. Of course, it just makes it worse when these kinds of douchbags jump on it like this and ruin it for the rest of us. Like trilbies. I love my trilby; my wife bought it for me because I look hot in it (allegedly). I certainly won’t stop wearing it, but it annoys me to know that Internet douchebags have besmirched the reputation of trilby-wearers everywhere. Can’t even get the name of the accessory right, either.

AsAboveSoBelow
AsAboveSoBelow
4 years ago

Cargo pants and cargo shorts are cool. Cut-off BDUs are cooler. Or is that hotter? I dunno, but I like them.

msexceptiontotherule
msexceptiontotherule
4 years ago

I confess, my purse/bag generally has everything but the kitchen sink or another human being in it. I’ve tried to cut back on the stuff I carry around in it, even attempted to force that by getting smaller sized bags…haven’t succeeded. At least I’m the only one who has to carry the thing?

I find cargo shorts/pants unflattering on me, therefore I do not wear them. The mister might own a couple pairs and as long as he likes wearing them I’m ok with that.

guest
guest
4 years ago

‘The cargo pockets are too far down on the leg and that makes accessing them cumbersome, especially when moving.’

A friend explained to me that that pocket location comes from military pilots; you can reach the pockets while squashed into a small cockpit. Said friend drives a Morgan, and wears cargo pants for that same reason.

Olive O'Sudden
Olive O'Sudden
4 years ago

Cargo shorts are hideous because most men walk around in them with the giant, loose pockets hanging empty and sloppy and the pocket flaps all bent and rumpled. And changing the name to ‘tactical shorts’ doesn’t change the reality that very few guys use them to cart around tactical gear! But the same can be said for any shorts that look unkempt. Most straight women prefer a man’s clothing to be clean and neat, and cargo shorts can be both of those things.

Oh, and if your wallet is thicker than two inches, you shouldn’t be wearing it in your pants unless you’re also wearing a jacket that covers your ass, otherwise you end up with a butt tumor. The front thigh wallet tumor in tight pants is also weird.

joekster
joekster
4 years ago

I have a pair of both cargo pants and cargo shorts, and I use them for weekend-wear. They’re actually pretty handy for storing spare Cliff-bars in for when I’m wandering around town.

However, if the MGTOWs succeed in identifying with them, I’ll have to ditch my favorite relaxation wear.

Thanks, MGTOWs. Will you guys please go your own way and stop ruining things for everyone else? Please?

joekster
joekster
4 years ago

However, I’m already married, and the only person who gets a vote on my appearance on my off-time is my wife. She doesn’t care. End of story.

joekster
joekster
4 years ago

Oh, and I’m pretty sure that the lack of usable pockets in ‘fashionable’ women’s wear is a not-subtle form of misogyny designed to make women feel they have to be dependent on either a handbag or another person in order to be attractive. It’s really quite twisted, if you think about it.

Thomas Beckett
Thomas Beckett
4 years ago

You should definitely do a post about Phyllis Schlafley. On the other hand, I’m not sure how you can justify doing so as you are a feminist and Phyllis was a woman of public repute who deserves respect for her choices.

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@Thomas Beckett
I have no idea who this woman was, but feminists believe that women should be held up for criticism for their actions just like men are. Just because someone is a woman doesn’t mean feminists give her a pass.

leftwingfox
leftwingfox
4 years ago

POCKETS FOR EVERYBODY!!!

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
4 years ago

@Tommy Boy
Justification: a thing happened

Problem sorted

@kupo

I have no idea who this woman was

In short, the worst

kupo
kupo
4 years ago

@Axe
Just read the cliffs notes version on Wikipedia. Yup, the worst. Not sure which version of “respect” TB was going for there, but I’m going to hope it was the basic respect for fellow human kind.

Buttercup Q. Skullpant
Buttercup Q. Skullpant
4 years ago

I’ve had stares in the past from girls who would bug out when their phone was low on battery but didn’t have a charger on them because they couldn’t carry it in their tight pockets or wrist purse thing.

Wasn’t there some PUA blogger who suggested keeping an assortment of phone chargers on hand so that women could no longer use “low phone battery” as a ruse to deep-six an evening with one of these delightful would-be alphas?

(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
(((VioletBeauregarde))): Social Justice Necromancer
4 years ago

Re: Phyllis Schafly–I wish I could say I was sad, but I still had the “Ding Dong the witch is dead” feeling. I just wish this was a trade-off, she dies and we get Prince or Alan Rickman or Gene Wilder back.

@joekster: Hmmm…now that I think about it, you might be right. I’m still sticking to my practical large-pocketed clothing and/or a bag. Thankfully clothes can be nice-looking *and* comfortable *and* practical–there seems to be an increase in those kinds of clothing for women.

Buttercup Q. Skullpant
Buttercup Q. Skullpant
4 years ago

Dangnab it! What happened to my “s”? I somehow turned into a Skullpant (singular) and got stuck in moderation.

(My ancestral surname was Skullcargoshorts, but the feminazis purged it from existence)

Handsome "Punkle Stan" Jack

@kupo

This is my favorite part.

Schlafly became an outspoken opponent of the Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) during the 1970s as the organizer of the “STOP ERA” campaign. STOP was an acronym for “Stop Taking Our Privileges.” Schlafly argued that the ERA would take away gender-specific privileges currently enjoyed by women, including “dependent wife” benefits under Social Security, separate restrooms for males and females, and exemption from the Selective Service (the Army draft).

Like, what? What?

And, then, like:

Schlafly opposed same-sex marriage and civil unions: “[a]ttacks on the definition of marriage as the union of one man and one woman come from the gay lobby seeking social recognition of their lifestyle.”] Linking the Equal Rights Amendment to LGBT rights and same-sex marriage played a role in Schlafly’s opposition to the ERA.

Schlafly believed the Republican Party should reject immigration reform proposals; she told Focus Today that it is a “great myth” that the GOP needs to reach out to Latinos in the United States. “The people the Republicans should reach out to are the white votes, the white voters who didn’t vote in the last election. The propagandists are leading us down the wrong path,” she said. “There’s not any evidence at all that these Hispanics coming in from Mexico will vote Republican.”

http://i588.photobucket.com/albums/ss328/LoLane87/Glee%20Gifs%202/SantanaWhy.gif

I just wish this was a trade-off, she dies and we get Prince or Alan Rickman or Gene Wilder back.

Thanks for reminding me Gene Wilder’s dead.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

Thomas,

Never fear. David has already done a post about her.
https://wehuntedthemammoth.com/2014/04/16/phyllis-schlafly-channels-the-manosphere-with-a-column-about-female-hypergamy/

Since feminism doesn’t actually mean that we must agree with every woman no matter what, I don’t see why we should respect her opinions though. With her campaigning against the ERA and abortion rights, she’s done a lot to hurt women. Definitely not a feminist.

AliBoBali
AliBoBali
4 years ago

Bring back the FUNCTIONAL fanny pack, too!!

Fashion has a way of turning on itself after a period of… a while. Mullets were fairly functional – “business in the front, party in the back” – but now beards and faux mo’s have taken over. Functional fanny packs are also faux pas. ‘Tis what ’tis.

It’s not specialized man-oppression that men are getting their functional cargo shorts taken from them by conscientious significant others… or men risk wearing them and being derided. Women know this “can’t win” situation better than men do (imho) — and I speak for myself when I say that I don’t care if a man wants to wear cargo shorts! I just will wonder why he hasn’t evolved to the equally as functional man purse! Those things are sharp! A nice cross body bag is much preferred to hold all your extra stuff.

My 80 yo father likes his fisherman’s vest (aka photographer’s vest) for holding all his goodies, and at his age no one cares. If men want to make photog vests a Fashion Do, I would support that. In the meantime, the unisex bags are quite nice.

I wonder why a man wouldn’t just choose a BAG as an accoutrement to hold all their stuff…….. ?? Why must it be “cargo shorts or bust?”

Thomas Beckett
Thomas Beckett
4 years ago

Indubatibly and definitively, Phyllis was a great lady who quite reasonably may have been put forward as Queen of the United states in a just world where the Catholic Church took its rightful place as center of all government. Indeed many solypsystic actions are taken against women who commit thoughtcrimes against the new progressive order. By feminist logic, we conservative men must defend them against discrimination.

Thomas Beckett
Thomas Beckett
4 years ago

I bet you all despise and denigrate Mother Theresa as well.

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
4 years ago

Thomas really thinks this blog never criticizes women? What is Andrea Hardie, a chupacabra?

Oh, and Schlafly supported the death penalty for kids. It’s claimed that she died of cancer, but I think she was slain by Sam and Dean Winchester.

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