Yesterday, as Gawker staffers drowned their sorrows in whatever booze they could get their hands on at a bare-bones farewell party of sorts for the once-mighty, now bankrupt internet media empire, a new site bearing the Gawker brand introduced itself to the world: The Cuck, a “new pop-up bespoke men’s interest site, for men.”
If the timing and the title weren’t enough to clue readers in to the fact that The Cuck was a joke, a quick glance at the official announcement should have convinced all but the dullest readers of this fact:
Sex, dating, clothes, relationships, politics, sex, women—men have opinions about all of these things. And yet, there’s nowhere on the internet where you can go to read them. That changes today. …
The Cuck is a site dedicated to exploring modern masculinity in all its myriad forms, and over the next few days or until it is apparent that we have not been able to attract a really loaded sponsor (P&G please call us back), you’ll hear from some of the most thoughtful men—and non-men—working in media (Gawker Media, specifically) today.
The first story to go up on the new site? A comically overwrought essay on The Politics of Sitting Down To Pee.
Basically, The Cuck is a dig at New York magazine’s short-lived Beta Male site, which launched and folded earlier this year, with a nod at the idiots on the far right who’ve turned “cuck” into this year’s most embarrassing insult. (Embarrassing, that is, to those who use the insult, not those on the receiving end, who couldn’t care less.)
So, everyone got the joke immediately, right? Well, no.
On Twitter, an assortment of the sort of idiots who think “cuck” is a killer insult proudly announced their gullibility to the world; some of them even managed to work in gratuitous plugs for Donald Trump.
https://twitter.com/jackmb_/status/763715445862109184
https://twitter.com/OboroSensei/status/763600655055486976
https://twitter.com/MrJohnQZombie/status/763598544951533568
https://twitter.com/NickJFuentes/status/763538499492425729
https://twitter.com/FuturistGirl/status/763588287999184896
https://twitter.com/sintheticality/status/763535034015821824
https://twitter.com/JdogFromDaATown/status/763518227208998912
THIS IS AN ARTICLE FROM A SITE CALLED "THE CUCK" OWNED BY GAWKER. I REPEAT: THIS IS NOT A PARODY OR SATIRE. pic.twitter.com/d36uNNc7Gj
— maritan (@maritanlive) August 10, 2016
Hahahhahahahhahahahhahahahhah
Hahahah
Owning it doesn't give you power
Demographics is destiny, CUCK!#MAGA https://t.co/ezKSolIQ8n
— Realist, MBA (@AltJewish) August 10, 2016
https://twitter.com/NAL6776/status/763510933599686657
GAWKER HAS A NEW BRAND
THEY LITERALLY NAMED THEMSELVES "THE CUCK"
THIS IS NOT A DRILL
— Jayngfet (@Jayngfet) August 11, 2016
https://twitter.com/HesGotAFro/status/763561856636039168
For god sake Gawker, you're not gonna take back cuck, people won't be using cuck as a term of endearment any time soon.
— Patch (@SoulPatchanBuff) August 11, 2016
https://twitter.com/billnhillsbong/status/763545477409280000
https://twitter.com/MaximumOverhonk/status/763503086367232000
https://twitter.com/KaiserTrigger/status/763500101935312896
https://twitter.com/dreamedofdust/status/763495529854697472
This exists because mankind deserves only pain and death. God has abandoned us all and we deserve it. https://t.co/Wszdxi1hQ4
— takashi I hate everything yamamoto (@drunkenalpaca) August 10, 2016
https://twitter.com/Fb1Marissa/status/763492145500155905
Gaslighting a media outlet into thinking that Cuck could *ever* be something other than a perjorative… pic.twitter.com/gfOb9Lvl1s
— Boyd Cooper (@Crud_Bungler) August 11, 2016
Peak CUCK.https://t.co/SNXFmXvuPr@RadixJournal @RichardBSpencer @ReactionaryTree @WestDeclines @wesearchr @Ricky_Vaughn99 #MAGA
— Realist, MBA (@AltJewish) August 11, 2016
https://twitter.com/Sourstin/status/763627287765848065
The Cuck site isn’t all that funny, honestly. The real humor comes from all the idiots who don’t get the joke.
Having fun searching "Gawker" & seeing all the altright dingalings circling so close to realizing The Cuck is a joke pic.twitter.com/rsMMxPpfaZ
— Coconut Tree Faller Outer Ofer (@Cam_Oflage) August 10, 2016
So close, yet so far away.
@Sinkable John : Pansy Ass Pinko
My theory was more a throwback to the RNC, in which the republicans constantly argued against the facts that were being thrown at them by claiming “that may be true, but the american people don’t feel it to be true, so we’re going to go with what we/they feel and not what the experts say.”
But honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if he actually used bio-safe spraypaint on himself.
In the UK there is a new website and phone app for ordering takeaways or booking restaurants online, I had to laugh when I saw this sign up in the window of our local Indian takeaway. Lololol 🙂
Guess it doesn’t mean the same thing to our local Nazis. Yet.
http://home.papa.org.uk/images/members/logo/300/kukd.jpg
Technically, if she never divorced or her first husband isn’t dead, her marriage to Trump is completely invalid. I don’t even think any prenuptials count because they were never legally marry.
Run, Melania, run. I believe in you.
SFHC:
I think this should explain:
Good lord. So many of them are missing the punchline of this simplistic joke, and yet they claim leftists have low IQ.
No, no, no, it’s completely meta, you see? They’re only pretending to fall for it in order to troll leftists! Because pretending to be stupid makes people misunderestimate them dontcha know. And they’ll leverage that as an advantage to strike back at the gynarchy! Which they know doesn’t really exist, making the whole thing double-mega-satire!
Bina,
“And no word as to when/if she divorced Hubby of Convenience #1, either. If she didn’t, that makes her a bigamist…and it makes Drumpf a…say it with me, folks…”
I think you’ve got that backwards – hubby number one would be the cuckold.
From wikipedia: “A cuckold is the husband of an adulterous wife. In evolutionary biology, the term is also applied to males who are unwittingly investing parental effort in offspring that are not genetically their own.”
I guess Donny boy would be the cuck-er.
I can’t wait for H of C #1 to be interviewed. Wonder which way he’ll vote November!
The Geppetto-ing was kind of amusing in a weird way.
Also, had “cuck” been an insult when I first made my blog, that’s what I would’ve called it.
This is the funniest thing that ever happened. Thank you both so much. I laughed until my significant other interrogated me about it, at which point she laughed too hard to talk.
Besides being involved in a cucky marriage with a wife whose n-count is > 0, Trump is also a false rape accuser (see: Central Park Five).
He’s starting to look positively Blue Pill!
Right? She can do so much better. I’m praying she leaves him…preferably sometime in October, for maximum surprise.
And I hope Hubby of Convenience #1 pops up to say he’s voting Dem in late September or thereabouts.
Just so everyone is aware, the word “sperg” is a pejorative term for autistic people. Started on 4chan and related shitholes, comes from “Asperger.”
I just like being given opportunities to point out anti-autistic slurs when they’re given to me because people don’t know how much 4chan and related shitholes really fucking love to hate autistic people.
Plus, since the parody site was named after another godawful 4chan meme, I might as well explain another one so people who are allies to autistic people can watch out for them.
The forum I was on once – alt.devilbunnies – had a phrase for this. It was called ‘standing near the airport’ – everything keeps flying over your head!
David, I’m getting Trump ads from Taboola. Just thought that you should be aware.
Off Topic
New rape case of entitled white-boy-rapist that avoids prison and gets away with.
https://www.buzzfeed.com/tasneemnashrulla/no-prison-for-entitled-college-student-who-raped-intoxicated?utm_term=.nb1GrZvgq7#.jkpBYmKo02.
Brook Turner syndrome continues.
But hey, rape culture doesn’t exist!
OT, picked the most recent thread, journalism related
Not to harsh anyone’s Olympic buzz, but:
http://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/nico-hines-grindr-story-infuriates-lgbtq-community-n628631
TLDR, a reporter at the Daily Beast wrote an expose on the athletes looking to get laid and sorta outed some people (I say “sorta”, cos he didn’t name names. He narrowed some shit down tho). It should be noted that not all participating countries are that progressive on the issue of fuckin rights and whatnot. The yellow shitshow was edited after ‘a number of readers complained’ to try and undo the damage. The internet is forever, so I doubt it did too much good. There’s an Editors Note that reads more like a ‘so sorry that y’all couldn’t understand our journalistic integrity and brilliance. Why can’t you see how devoted to equality we are?’ than anything else. A pretty well written apology I suppose. ‘Left wing’, alt media was a mistake ?
@Kafka
Fuck!
@Axecalibur
The reporter had better be willing and able to provide host homes in a safe country for those athletes at risk of returning to their nation of origin only to be jailed or otherwise harshly punished.
:/
@KafkaNoMore
But won’t someone think of the damage it will do to the poor boy if he has to serve time? (Sarcasm, if that wasn’t obvious)
@Axe
So gross. Why is that even something a “journalist” would write about in the first place?
Left-wing tabloid trash like Gawker and its subsidiaries, Slate, etc. have unironically published articles about men enjoying the open relationships that their wives requested, finding feminism after discovering their wife cheated, and rationalizing sitting down to pee. A website like The Cuck was only the next logical progression. You can’t really call it satire; self-deprecating, almost to the point of self-loathing “humor” seems to be more appropriate.
While we’re sharing OT links, two men finally discuss what’s important about the Olympics: whether women athletes should wear makeup to look pretty for the men watching. http://www.refinery29.com/2016/08/119625/fox-news-olympic-beauty-debate
@msexception
They can live with him. And his wife. That he was legally allowed to marry and never wouldn’t have been!
@kupo
Appropriate use of quotes
I’m thinking he got hit with Progressive Dunning Krueger. PDK mostly shows up in well off white dudes in well off white dude professions as an inability to recognize when one is Not Helping. In this case, the London Editor (the fuck?) of the Beast goes to Rio to cover the Olympics. What to write about? Hmm… Sex! Why not? While he pats himself on the back for eschewing rigid norms of sexual behavior, he neglects to give a passing thought to the people who are actually, coercively stuck in those norms. People complained about the piece? But, but, he staff at the Beast support gay rights. Aaargh!!
Out some people, dox a country, have anything to do with Slate, doesn’t matter. If you’re not ‘right’, it’s alright. Apparently
Sorry for the rant. Imma go stare at the Luke Cage trailers on a loop until I’m better…
@Steampunked:
Alt.devilbunnies*! 😀 It’s been forever since I’ve seen anyone mention that old Usenet board! Didn’t think anybody remembered it. Tell me that game survived Usenet’s execution by whoever bought it out, please? It, alt.dragons, and rec.sf.composition (I think that was the how-to-write-sf&f board) all needed to survive somehow, imo.
(And before you ask, no, I never posted there. I was a very very new noob at the time I found that group, and had no idea how to roleplay online back turn. 🙁 )
*The alt.devilbunnies plot, for those wondering, was (IIRC) cute but deadly bunnies trying to take over the world. Their enemies were the Fudds, who tried to stop them. Fun active game, from what I saw of it.
@Ohlmann
I suppose a paranoid reactionary world view also explains all the Republicans who thought(past tense? I hope?) Stephen Colbert was really a right wing pundit.
@kupo
This reminds me years back, observing the various women’s gymnastics teams. Without question, the USA team wore the most cosmetics in comparison. I left me with the impression other countries were clearer on the fact they are athletes, not fashion models.
This is part of the reason I’m into powerlifting as opposed to bodybuilding. Those women work hard, but they’re pressured to dope and criticized if they don’t look ‘feminine’ enough for male judges. Powerlifting doesn’t give a shit about that crap; all you have to do is lift the weight.
Oh this is beautiful, not only do I get to see one last sendoff from Gawker with this level of satire, but I also get to taste sweet Delicious irony, Trump, the people who often kept using the term cuck, is by their definition a cuckold.
But seriously I hope his wife and leave him and get away from his, well, everything and the toxic people around him.