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“The #Istanbul attacks cockblocked me,” pickup artist complains

Terrorism, so inconvenient
Terrorism, so inconvenient

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Pity poor “Kyle Trouble,” the pickup artist. The globetrotting woman-pesterer was enjoying the second day of a trip to Istanbul yesterday when bombs went off at the airport, killing more than 40 people.

An hour later, Kyle posted to his blog “This Is Trouble,” complaining that “the #Istanbul attacks JUST cockblocked me.”

That’s a kind of collateral damage of terrorism that you don’t generally hear much about.

“In case you missed it,” Kyle wrote.

two bombs went off at the airport about an hour or so ago.

I’m staying in the Taksim Square area, and most people are still out and seem relatively unaffected, but the streets are quieting down a bit early.

Oh, and my date just got a phone call in the middle of our drinks and left because she didn’t feel safe in the center.

My attempts at, “My apartment is a great place to hide out”, did not end so well.

If Kyle Trouble can’t score himself a hottie tonight, does that mean that the terrorists have won?

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Kat
Kat
8 years ago

Kyle thinks he’s being funny by (allegedly) thinking about his dick while (allegedly) bombs are going off (not where he is, of course).

The joke’s on you, Kyle — if you were half as alpha as you claim to be, she would’ve stayed until you got off. And then left when you were done with her.

Here’s what you don’t understand about being an alpha, Kyle: a real alpha never experiences any trouble or inconvenience. No illness. No money woes. No sadness because others are sad. Nope! Just winning all the time.

So you, Kyle, are at best, a wannabe.

Probably not even that.

(((Her Grace Phryne))): Tool of the Butt-Worshipping, Lesbian-Powered Elite
(((Her Grace Phryne))): Tool of the Butt-Worshipping, Lesbian-Powered Elite
8 years ago

I just read the comments on the other post, and wow. Dude got butthurt because nobody was listening to him, then tried to excuse typos by saying he was having sex at the time? AND tried to sell his “book”?

Clearly he hasn’t learned anything since then. Wonder what happened to the “girlfriend”. I hope she’s safe and happy.

And I have to thank you, because now I know what we’re having for dinner. Yep, as the lone woman in the house, I’m going to force these males to have PANCAKES. I just haven’t decided what kind yet… strawberry or gingerbread?

Alais
8 years ago

@PI,

Thanks for the link. So, looks like this is the same Kyle who was having such boring sex that he thought that he’d have more fun coming here to neg a bunch of females who aren’t even halfway decent-looking.

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
8 years ago

Now I want pancakes and bacon.

Kat
Kat
8 years ago

Pancakes again? Picking up our discussion where we left off months ago?

Yes!

Thanks, Kyle, for reminding us once again about how delicious pancakes are!

You may now resume your negging or fucking (as if) or writing (ha, ha, ha!) or whatever else you were doing before you became aware that we were talking about YOU.

(((Her Grace Phryne))): Tool of the Butt-Worshipping, Lesbian-Powered Elite
(((Her Grace Phryne))): Tool of the Butt-Worshipping, Lesbian-Powered Elite
8 years ago

We had gingerbread pancakes and I even taught the boys how to cook them. Woohoo, where’s my misandry points? And if I save enough of them, can I trade them in for prizes?

Alais
8 years ago

@Kat,

Kyle must be particularly unhappy person. Not only does he refrain getting enough sleep. (Which one can do and still be intensely productive.) Oh no. He can’t properly enjoy pancakes or sex because he spends too much time being angry at women.

weirwoodtreehugger: communist bonobo

Misandry is a reward in and of itself.

Norah
Norah
8 years ago

Good sleep is essential to life. It’s really hard to function without it; could explain a lot about this guy.

Paradoxical Intention - Resident Cheeseburger Slut

Victorious Parasol | June 29, 2016 at 6:59 pm
Now I want pancakes and bacon.

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
8 years ago

Dang it, PI, it’s too late in my day to be makin’ bacon pancakes. 😉

Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
Axecalibur: Middle Name Danger
8 years ago

@PI
You beat me to it by like 5 seconds (couldn’t decide whether to do the New York remix or not)

mildlymagnificent
mildlymagnificent
8 years ago

Your Grace

where’s my misandry points? And if I save enough of them, can I trade them in for prizes?

Katie’s to do list is pretty full at the moment. Perhaps a note to Feminist HQ would move things along for you.

BritterSweet
8 years ago

What a surprise. /sarcasm

Whenever some sort of disaster occurs, you can pretty much always count on someone from within the manosphere a.) celebrating it because some people from groups they didn’t like were killed, b.) celebrating how upset it makes other people, bonus if feminists are among them, c.) blaming it on women/girls not having sex with them or being subservient to men, d.) making it about them and their struggles of not getting what they want, or e.) all of the above.

Kevin
Kevin
8 years ago

Just when I thought those oiks from the manureosphere couldn’t go any lower… (facepalms.)