Increasingly irrelevant Men’s Rights garbage site A Voice for Men has decided that now is the perfect time to weigh in on a two-year old Huffington Post piece titled A Gentleman’s Guide to Rape Culture.
In a post also titled A Gentleman’s Guide to Rape Culture, a self-described “warrior and philosopher” called Bad Dima boldly takes on what he thinks feminists mean when they talk about rape culture. From its blunt opening sentence (“F*ck you c*nt”) to its final paragraph heralding the eventual arrival of sexbots, Dima’s post is a Men’s Rights instant classic.
Dima begins by attacking a definition of rape culture that is literally not anyone’s definition of rape culture. “Rape exists, even amongst animals, but there is no such thing as Rape Culture,” he boldly declares. “There is no systematic effort to teach men to rape women.”
Huh. That’s not what rape culture is. Dima’s “rebuttal” is a bit like someone declaring that there are no birds — after defining birds as “potatoes with wings.”
So what is the real meaning of “rape culture.” In Transforming a Rape Culture, Emilie Buchwald defines it as
a complex set of beliefs that encourage male sexual aggression and supports violence against women. It is a society where violence is seen as sexy and sexuality as violent. In a rape culture, women perceive a continuum of threatened violence that ranges from sexual remarks to sexual touching to rape itself.
“Rape culture” refers to a culture in which rape is normalized to the extent that one in five women is a victim of rape or attempted rape; in which the whole world forgot for many years that Bill Cosby had been accused of rape by several women until a comedian brought it up in his act; in which a self-described “human rights activist” declares that
there are a lot of women who get pummeled and pumped because they are stupid (and often arrogant) enough to walk though life with the equivalent of a I’M A STUPID, CONNIVING BITCH – PLEASE RAPE ME neon sign glowing above their empty little narcissistic heads.
In case Dima is unfamiliar with the website he’s writing for, that last quote is from AVFM founder Paul Elam, raging about women who drink at bars and go home with men yet expect the seemingly decent and friendly men they’ve been enjoying the company of all evening to, you know, not rape them if they aren’t in the mood for sex.
Dima develops his critique further by declaring the author of the Huffington Post piece — a man — to be an
asswipe … the worst kind of human being there is – a hypocrite, a gender traitor, and feminist quisling. Have you considered getting gender reassignment, because we men don’t want stand next to you while pissing anymore.
While “rape culture” is a big lie, according to Dima, there is one form of culturally sanctioned sexual assault that is all too real:
Have you ever heard the word “swolesting.” It’s the phenomenon weightlifters experience of women groping their swoles (swollen muscles) as they move through a crowd.
Hey, dudes, what were you thinking getting all swole like that? It’s like you were asking for it!
Sorry; that was Swolesting Culture talking.
Dima then goes on to mansplain that the real reason women don’t like rape is because they don’t want inferior rapist DNA in their babies:
The reason why rape is considered such a crime, and why women feel such a revulsion for it, is that historically, the rape of a woman had a very real chance of leaving her carrying a child of inferior DNA and without any parental investment on the part of the rapist.
He then explains that paternity fraud is just as bad as rape:
The equivalent crime for men is paternity fraud, in which a man is deceived into making a parental investment in a child that is not his. … males are divided into two classes – DNA-providers and resource providers. The females get impregnated by DNA-providers while using resource-providers for parental investment – from the female perspective, what’s not to like about that deal.
After telling us that women don’t want bad boy rapist DNA, Dima informs us that women DO want it after all. And that’s why there are rapists in the first place!
Women select for anti-social traits in their bad boy DNA-providers (ask me for papers), and strangely enough, most rapists come from amongst the bad boys. So, by their sexual preference for bad boys, women play a role in perpetuating the very thing they say they fear and hate.
Oh, and women are basically human-sized versions of little yappy dogs that yap at everything:
Did you know that the smaller breeds of dogs were bred as alarms for travellers? You would carry the yappy little dog with you, and when you set up camp, the dog would alert you to any dangers by yapping. Women are like little yappy dogs, bred to alert men to hazards. In the absence of danger, the dog will yap at anything, its instincts no longer relevant.
Dima then informs the ladies of a bit o sad news for them: he personally isn’t going to lift a finger to help them if they’re ever in danger.
As a damsel in distress, the vast majority of men are conditioned and indoctrinated to assist and keep you safe, even to the point of sacrificing their lives. Not me, 23 cents in the dollar is not worth risking my life for.
Wait, so the wage gap is real, now? Most MRAs insist — often quite indignantly — that it’s totally fake, an evil feminist myth. Apparently it becomes real any time an MRA figures out how to use it in an argument against a feminist.
When I see a woman in distress, and I feel my protective instincts kicking in, I remind myself of the pervasive misandry amongst women: that women see men as little more that labour saving devices, support mechanisms, bodyguards, and beasts of burden. I remind myself just what sh*tty people women can be, and then the protective instinct moment passes, and I get on with my life.
Er, how often do you run across “women in distress,” dude? Do you live next door to Rapunzel’s tower?
Also, women are apparently not fully human.
As men, the kindest and most generous thing we can do for women is to leave them to their own devices. Only by denying them any male support will they be forced to become fully actualized human beings.
But I guess it’s good for women that they’re incompletely human. Because that will take a little bit of the sting away when they are eventually REPLACED BY SEXY LADY SEX ROBOTS!
This might take a few generations, but the time of sex robots is coming, and when it does, the full scope of how little most women bring to the table will be revealed. I am confident that the vast majority of men will give up on relations with women if their sexual needs are otherwise satisfied. This will provoke an existential crisis for women.
Dima ends his post right there, which seems a little, well, abrupt. Is is possible the robots got to him?
We may never know the answer to that question. Or care, actually, so never mind. I’ll just stop here too.
If we actually get robots sophisticated enough to have realistic sex, robotic technology will have advanced so much that most men won’t be needed for their jobs. As only people with wombs can, you know, make babies, it seems far more likely to me that the robot revolution will make men obsolete.
“Swolesting”? Really? Frankly, that’s honestly just about the most moronic fucking thing I’ve ever heard from these “Men’s Movement” jackwipes, and that’s saying something, considering all I’ve ever read over the years.
(P.S., glad to see you’re still working hard at exposing these assholes, Dave. Hope all is well with you. =) )
Didn’t we have a troll called jake in the other thread making exactly the same sort of story as this guy? That he deliberately ignored a woman being beaten by her husband because wimminz are ebil?
The manosphere are not that great at consitstancy even in their idiotic logic. i am pretty sure if sexbots become a thing they would file restraining orders against these guys.
“The reason why rape is considered such a crime, and why women feel such a revulsion for it, is that historically, the rape of a woman had a very real chance of leaving her carrying a child of inferior DNA and without any parental investment on the part of the rapist.”
So nothing to do with violation of bodily autonomy, about the theft of control and choice, about the pain and violence of the act itself or fear of what happens when resistance is offered, about the knowledge that someone who despises you enough to rape you could go on to kill you. Women couldn’t possibly have emotions sophisticated enough for that.
And all those people who can’t get pregnant – most men, children, post-menopausal people, but who seem to be just as traumatised by rape? Does he think they lack the capacity for real damage as well? Are they just silly overreacting slurwords like us?
I don’t know why I get so upset by this still. Please, please, may these guys be able to distract themselves with sexbots some day, as much as I fear they won’t be satisfied unless they are hurting real people.
You have a point, Tulse. If they’re sophisticated enough to be decent sex partners, then surely they’re sophisticated enough to do all the heavy lifting men complain about. Robots will be far superior providers, so women will be even less interested in betas than they are now. By their own rationale, men will be reduced to nothing but sperm creators — and it’s far easier to keep a few testicles alive and producing swimmers in a lab than develop an artificial womb. Men — in their paradigm — will be made redundant waaaaay before women.
Why do these fools never realize things go both ways?
Again with the bizarre sexbot threat. That’s all they’ve got.
Wait, wut?
I’m so confused by this statement. Are we to ask him for scientific papers that back this theory (cause if so I’m genuinely curious and would like to see)? Or are women obviously selecting for anti-social traits by asking him for papers? STD testing results? Genetic testing results? Rolling papers?
Dude is an MRA. He likely hangs out with other MRAs in meatspace. My guess is he runs across “women in distress” on a regular basis, because it would be his buddies doing the distressing.
Already am one, thanks. And I did it without your “help”, too! >blows razzberries<
@Jen
“Are we to ask him for scientific papers that back this theory (cause if so I’m genuinely curious and would like to see)?”
There is a Wikipedia article on the “Dark Triad” (ruthlessness, narcissism, psychopathy) personality traits that links to a lot of psychology papers. Basically some psychologists think that nasty people may have stayed around in the human population because their nastiness-causing genes are associated with alternative reproductive strategies to being a worthwhile father. The theories centre around them having lots of casual sex, partly because people won’t stay in long term relationships with them so they have more time, partly because getting a one-night stand is easier if you don’t mind lying or avoiding other responsibilities, partly because they are unfaithful in supposedly monogamous relationships. Also, they are usually considered attractive because narcissists take more care with their appearance.
All these theories are deeply contested as sociobiological biotruths, of course. No-one has ever identified a selfish prat gene. MRA’s basically worship the Dark Triad as a template for masculine behaviour.
This level of dumb should be accompanied by physical pain.
Gee, most of the times I’ve seen someone uninvitedly run their hands over something swollen, it’s been a pregnant belly, not biceps.
Absolutely correct, dude. Stay far, far, far away from women. I don’t care what your rationale is, I just like the results.
Dateline 2046: Elam Head In a Jar dictates article on how Sexbots Don’t Really Love You, Only Interested In 10w40 and Cybermony!
Cool, cool. So then, why is “swolesting” bad? You can’t get pregnant from it.
The best theory I’ve heard about why little dogs yap so much is because it’s a survival trait for them. “Hey!! Watch where you’re putting your feet, ya oversized maroon!!! You almost stepped on me there!!” >:|
Now if I can only remember where I read that at….
As a dangling modifier, I am greatly offended by this sentence.
No, because it’s not actually a thing. Women don’t generally go around groping strange dude’s pecs uninvited, because A) it’s rude and disrespectful, B) not all women are attracted to muscles, and C) because the response will be unpredictable, possibly violent. What person in their right mind would grope someone who’s stronger and likely to retaliate physically? It’s a made-up joke confined to Urban Dictionary and a couple of Reddit forums.
It just goes to show how little he knows about the actual dynamic behind harassment, assault, and rape.
You mean it isn’t? I know I need an Advil after reading nonsense like this.
Alternate title: “Some Vaguely Possible Thing I Just Thought Of That Confirms My Bias, Presented Without Any Critical Thought”
I can’t help thinking that AVFM posts like this one are just unfocused, widely-broadcast negs. “Come prove to me, ladies, that you are worth my time” is the message I get.
How about no? How about you stay in your lonely corner while literally nobody falls for your clumsy foray? That sounds much better to me.
Yeah, rape culture doesn’t just affect women, although women seem to be affected the most. EVERYONE can get raped and be affected by rape and the reason it’s so prevalent is because of rape culture.
I’ve heard yappiness is a dominance trait – it’s the dog claiming you as his/her property.
Still, I’m amused by the image of fur-clad barbarians setting up camp for the night, and putting chihuahuas around the perimeter.
whoa, this is all in ONE post? goddamn, some serious Poe’s Law shit going on here…
To be fair, I wouldn’t be surprised if “swolesting” happened occasionally. Dudes in kilts also get harassed more often than the general male population.
It’s still the same root problem: that we don’t really teach or respect consent or bodily autonomy as a culture. To claim there’s no such thing as rape culture because men are also occasionally harassed, assaulted or raped is shitty on multiple levels.