Yesterday, we took a look at some completely ridiculous “Selfish Feminist” memes, based on the premise that women adopt feminism because that way they can reap all sorts of nifty benefits without having to work as hard as men, most notably the FREE DINNERS they constantly con poor schmucks into paying for. (Allegedly.)
For some reason, half of the memes involved actress/activist Ashley Judd, who isn’t really a selfish person at all.
You may recall that one of the memes was captioned “Why I need feminism? Sounds better than ‘selfishness.'”
Well, here’s another one using that little tagline that somehow manages to be creepier and cringier than all the rest of the “selfish feminist” memes all together.
Yep. In the mind of whoever made this meme, women not shaving their armpits is somehow a … selfish act, presumably because “ew, women with hairy armpits.”
Note to dudes who think this meme is somehow clever: What someone chooses to do (or not do) with their body is really only your business if you happen to own that body. Given that, you know, slavery is illegal and all that, the only body you own is your own body.
Women don’t owe it to men in general (or to you in particular) to shave their armpits or any other part of their body, pluck their eyebrows, keep their weight within the parameters you prefer, and so on and so on.
No, dudes, you are not obliged to find women with armpit hair attractive. The flip side of this is that women aren’t obliged to give a rat’s ass what you think of their armpits, or any other part of their body.
@Chiomara, I’m so sorry. Bloody hell, you must all of you be in shock – what an appalling thing to happen. I know I’m only a distant internet stranger, but I so hope your parents and you are all right. Sending you and your parents every good wish.
@Chiomara
I’ll chime in with the well-wishing and thanks that you seem to have gotten out OK. My most positive thoughts to your parents for their recovery.
@pitshade
I guess that shows how easy it is to ignore problematic behavior in somebody you know, if it’s subtle. I wouldn’t say I’ve seen red flags with him…but a couple of pink flags have popped up recently.
Yes they were…behind a wall of fire. I am voiceless because I could only scream. Oh, god. I’d prefer anything done to me instead of having them there. I don’t know if a human being can feel a bigger pain or hear sounds more horrible.
They literally crossed through the fire. It was so brave. I am so proud.
Jesus. I didn’t know I could scream that loud.
Please, have a fire extinguisher, however that’s spelled, at your house. Please gave a escape plan ready and please be careful with electricity.
Thank you for the simpathy.
We will be fine. I will keep you informed. I am so sorry for bringing such randomness and negative things. I turned on my phone and this website was there and I could only wait so I typed.
I am sorry for doing this all the time here. I swear it’s not for attention. I just think you are kind people. I don’t know. Thank you guys.
It’s the international family day.
If there’s a god above, thank you god.
Pray.
My heart and prayers go out to you and your family, Chiomara. I pray for their speedy (and complete) recovery.
“Women should be naturally beautiful!” Says the man pointing at the woman wearing primer, foundation, blush, winged eyeliner, contour, and eyebrow pencil.
http://stealyourbeauty.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/Natural-Makeup-12.jpg
“Look how beautiful she looks without makeup!” He crows to the internet. “She’s nothing like those devious snakes who cake it on just to fool me into thinking they’ve got green eyelids! She’s naturally beautiful!”
As for JB and her “I don’t act out because my husband should hit me if I do!”, I only have one word for that:
Fun story time: When Grandma Intention first married Grandpa Intention many years ago, she straight up told him that if he ever hit her, she wouldn’t be able to fight back. She was weaker and smaller than he was, and the both of them knew it (Grandpa Intention was in the Navy and did lots of construction-work style jobs).
However, she told him that if he ever did lay hands on her, he better not go to sleep around her, because she’d make him regret it.
And the whole time they were married, up until the day Grandpa Intention died (gods rest his soul), he never laid hands on Grandma Intention.
@Chiomara
Best wishes for you and your parents, and many many hugs. You’re a sweet person. Never worry about coming here for support – it’s what we’re for.
@Chiomara
That’s terrible! I hope everything turns out well for you and your family.
@Chiomara
I don’t know if you and/or your parents need any financial help recovering from the fire, but if you do please post a link. I know I would be glad to chip in and I’m sure others would as well.
A little late, but adding to the hugs Chiomara. Please don’t think you need to be apologetic about discussing personal problems here. A lot of us do it.
@Chiomara
I’m so sorry you and your parents had to go through that. You are welcome to as many Internet hugs if you want them. I hope your parents have a speedy recovery and you are okay. Seconding what Imaginary Petal and Kupo said.
So sorry, Chio ?
My thoughts with you, Chiomara. That’s terrifying.
@ Chiomara
No need to apologize. Best wishes to you and your family and speedy healing.
Chiomara-I am so sorry you and your family had gone through this. That must have been terrifying! I am so glad you and your parents made it out alive. You and your parents are so brave and courageous! Lots of hugs to you and your parents ((((((Chiomara and family))))))
I am so sorry Chiomara; that sounds like my worst nightmare. I am only just joining this community, but it’s clearly a warm place. Don’t feel bad.
@Chiomara
God, that sounds terrifying. I hope your parents recover soon.
@Chiomara- You have absolutely no need to apologize. I’m praying for you and your parents.
@Paradoxical Intention:
There was a post on imgur not too long ago that did exactly this. Some dudebro had posted a bunch of images of celebrities “without makeup”, gushing about how this was real beauty, and blah blah blah… and yup, all but two of them were obviously wearing makeup.
A bunch of commenters called this out, even identifying exactly what sorts of products each woman was wearing. The OP blustered a bit about how, “Well, but this isn’t OVERLY made up, so it’s more natural, so it looks like they aren’t wearing makeup.” Even though he had just been informed about how it was obvious makeup was involved.
But apparently “natural” means light makeup + professional photo shoot. Anything else is lazy or selfish or both.
@Chiomara
Oh, my god. How horrible. I also lived a nightmare regarding my parents recently – I know some of how you feel.
Talk. Keep talking. Go for short walks when you can. Breathe. Keep breathing. Love your parents and yourself as hard as you can, above anything.
@WWTH
“I’m going to go with none! Excepting self defense, there’s no such thing as making someone hit them. Hitting someone is a choice you, and you alone make.”
Right. And I’m going to go even further than you; even self-defense is a choice that a man makes. He could always choose to turn the other cheek, beg for mercy, accept his fate, or whatnot. I’m not saying that it’s wrong for a man to defend himself, just that there’s literally no situation where a man is forced to defend himself. It’s always a choice, reasonable or not.
Here’s where toxic masculinity really starts to hurt men. Because women are so “weak”, short of threatening a man with a weapon, there is no ” reasonable ” self defense for a man. I’m always amazed when I speak to men I know and I find that many (most) of them have been smacked (or worse) by a girl/woman at one point or another. Fuck that, and fuck any woman who thinks that it’s ok to hurt men. *NONE* of these men were physically violent or threatening.
Most of all, fuck MRAs like JB who use the above injustice to push the abuser’s lobby, harming everyone in the process.
/rant
@Chiomara
My best wishes and hopes that everything turns out for the best.
@chio
If anyone’s justified in dumping here it’s you. Wall of fire? Holy shit.
Here’s wishing the best.
Oh my heavens, Chiomara.
Best wishes from this side of the world. And for your parents. So brave. We’ll be thinking of all three of you.
Chiomara-
Don’t feel bad for turning to a community for emotional support at a trying time. 🙂
I hope your folks get better. Severe burns can be a hell of a lot to recover from.
My goodness, @Chiomara. I am not religious, but I will pray for their speedy and whole recovery for you. That’s horrible. I’m so glad they made it out.
Re: beautiful but not aware of it.
The first time I heard One Direction’s song ‘You Don’t Know You’re Beautiful’, I thought ‘vapid boy band song’.
The second time I heard it, I thought, ‘Wow, that’s actually somewhat stalker-ish, isn’t it?’
@Chiomara:
Ack. That sort of thing is everybody’s nightmare. Yes, I will send good wishes to you and your family. And yes, I have a fire extinguisher at home, though I should probably check it out because I’m not sure of its current status. (I also have the smoke detector wired into the alarm system with an outside monitoring company, so the fire department can get called automatically. Though I really need to look into expanding on that, as Ontario now mandates Carbon Monoxide alarms and I don’t have one of those yet.)
I see this is from our iced-menses-pop-decrying old friends the Anti White Knight Coalition. Does that mean any man who claims not to have a problem with lady armpit hair is suppressing his natural MANLY inclinations? His need for his erotic object choice to be as not-like-a-man as possible within the bounds of sentient Earth life? Do real manly men get hard for sea pigs and blobfish?
Those pitiful White Knights and their worshipful obedience to belchy, hairy, slimy, fishy human females.
@Jenora Feuer Yeah, what bugs me about that song is how conditional the “beautiful” is on self-denying humility. Like, everyone else in the room can see it, and why can’t you see it, but if you did see it you’d suddenly be vapid and vain and not at all like these totally AVERAGE and down-to-earth PROFESSIONAL MODELS in our video. Oh, look how progressive they are, some of the models have freckles.