Famously lady hating garbage site Return of Kings has published another one of their helpful posts outlining simple ways that women can drive away the sort of guy who takes dating advice from, well, Return of Kings.
In the post, titled “30 Signs That An Eastern European Girl Isn’t Relationship Material,” regular RoK contributor Jean-Batave Poqueliche provides a handy guide to all sorts of things that RoK Red Pillers see as red flags.
I’ve adapted some of my favorites into my own list of 8 Ways Eastern European Women Can Send Roosh Fanboys Running for the Door. Happily, many of these suggestions should also work for non-Eastern European women as well.
Throw your clothes (and possibly your birth control) on the floor
Poqueliche warns his readers to avoid women who are messy.
If you go to hers and … you discover that she has clothes on the floor and everything is out of place, beware. She is careless and has probably the same behavior towards sex and protection.
Let’s just set aside the irony of seeing this statement on a site run by Roosh V, who, by his own admission, had unprotected sex with multiple women over the course of several years even though he thought there was a good chance he had HIV.
The good news here is that women can scare off a Roosh fanboy by simply throwing some dirty socks on the floor.
Buy a few condoms
Apparently Roosh and his fanboys are more terrified by women who are so loose that they own their own condoms than they are of having sex with a woman they barely know without condoms.
Have friends from other countries
This, according to Poqueliche, is a sign that a women “likes foreign culture, ergo she is partial to a foreign knob that is not designed to be static.”
Wait, penises can generate static electricity? I should have probably read the manual a little more carefully.
Tell your date you prefer poetry to firearms
Poqueliche warns men not to date any woman who’s
repulsed by the idea of violence, manliness, or weapons.
She does not understand that a man could fight for his family, enjoy masculine hobbies or knows how to shoot. She wants a progressive man that reads poetry and is not ashamed to cry.
Do bawdy limericks count?
Learn enough about pickup artistry to know when some dude is trying it on you
Poqueliche tells men to shun any woman who
calls you out for escalating, not by playfully delaying it but putting it in words in the “I know what you are doing” way.
Alternately, you could simply work “player” or “pickup artist” or “you’re one of those creepy jackasses who reads Roosh, aren’t you” into your conversation, as that is also a sign to them that YOU KNOW.
Show your bellybutton
As Poqueliche sees it, this is a big slutty tell, and “generally the mark of an especially childish and irresponsible girl.”
Weirdly, RoK’s graphics-master chose to illustrate Poqueliche’s discussion of this important topic with a picture of a woman baring her belly in such a way that … her bellybutton is not actually visible.
Which raises the question: Do RoK readers actually know what a bellybutton is? Is it possible that Roosh and his readership come from some far-away planet where they reproduce by, I dunno, laying eggs, or cell division, or publishing crappy eBooks?
Be older than 25
RoK readers regularly express deep disdain towards women who make it past the quarter-century mark without snagging a man, declaring them unfit for serious relationships. So you’ve got that going for you.
Unfortunately Roosh and his fanboys are still totally willing to “bang” spinsters in their late 20s and up. Sorry old gals! While they don’t want to marry you, Roosh’s fanboys will still pester you for sex, especially since, as Poqueliche sees it, you decrepit old hags are basically easy pickings with
usually a higher notch count and some kind of a despair for a cock that comes with a prospect of relationship.
Henri here feels a similar despair, though in his case he hungers not for sex but for tuna fish
Cut your hair short
If you’re unable to ward off Roosh’s fanboys using any of the tips above, you can always CUT YOUR HAIR, something so terrifying for Poqueliche that it conjures up images of French villagers shaving the heads of women suspected of being Nazi collaborators in the aftermath of D-day.
No, really. You can practically hear him shudder as he asks
Why would a man want to have sex with something that looks like an underfed woman that got sheared just after the locals found out she slept with the occupying army?
Short hair: apparently the most effective form of creep-repellent after pepper spray.
@Kat
Sorry, I didn’t mean that all video shorts don’t teach you anything useful. I’m sure there are some good ones. I’m mostly referencing the super 50’s ones like a Date With Your Family; where the main message is “don’t share your feelings too much, because it will spoil dinner. Make sure you look rested when hubby comes home etc.” There are also lots of them then teach women skills for being a good wife like shopping, cooking, etc that actually do have a lot of useful practical advice if you overlook the gender roles part. I never hurts to learn how to shop or cook!
Re: Eurisko and tactics (and I have 1st printing of Traveller right here)
This reminds me of my first RPG group, specifically that time when people were playing Battletech — a mecha strategy game of kicking ass.
It has light, medium and heavy mechs, and a lot of people drift towards big heavy mechs like Atlas and others, because eff yeah, they’re cool. They are heavily armored, they have big guns, and they heat up like a black cat left into a black car in direct sunlight and need enormous heatsinks to avoid shutdowns.
One of the players (who had an uncanny knack for instinctive mathematics when annoyance factor was included) built a swarm of light/medium mechs to face medium and heavy mechs of his opponents.
Each mech came with…
37 machine guns + ammo. I remember the number so well, because it was carefully calculated to be the top number before the mech started to slow down too much. Basically, it was a walking pile of machine guns.
Sure… it meant that most damage was PLING! off Atlas’ armor. But… Machine guns have pretty decent chance for a crit, they do not heat up the mech, and light mechs move across battlefield like greased weasels. Best of all, machine gun ammo is not at all vulnerable to crits and potential explosions (when compared to missiles and other things).
And criticals are BRUTAL, especially when they start to accumulate. Some of the most dreaded ones are shutdowns and ammo explosions. The former leaves you a standing target, and the latter ignores armor and deals looooooots of damage.
Did I mention a swarm?
A single Atlas or couple of medium mechs stood no chance — accumulating criticals chewed through them, and if one of the light mechs got destroyed by that missile (targeting only single mech!), oh, no worries, there’s more of those nasty little fuckers.
…they made an unofficial rule that builds like these are now banned, ‘mmmkay, let’s not get carried away with this kind of nonsense.
re: Frames – frames are a pretty common term in psychology apparently – I refer to them in their artificial intelligence/cognitive science forms usually, but they’re related. The whole concept of “breaking frame” is a great one, though. It’s sort of glorious to watch a smug jerk short-circuit in confusion when you act outside of the script.
Takeaway: practice shifting from one frame to another mid-frame. Be water, my friend.
@Kat, laughing is great for you. It sort of shifts you out of the fight-or-flight response somewhat if you’re in it, fosters generation of the happy-hormones, improves clear thinking if you’re stressed. It’s a great reaction.
@kupo, <3. I get anxiety attacks too. I can't really tell you how to fix it, I'm not a therapist, but I might be able to give you some insights into the biology of what's going on in your brain? It might help you weather the storm.
It's a nasty self-reinforcing cycle, as far as I know. the fight-or-flight system is looking for threats constantly at a low level – when this is elevated, it's anxiety. When it detects a threat (which is often not actually a threat, but is just perceived as one due to the oversensitive FoF system) you get that run-from-bear rush of adrenaline. Everything tightens, since adrenaline is an inflammatory hormone in the body. So, your heartbeat goes up, your blood pressure goes up (inflammation in the arteries), your chest and throat tightens, etc.
At the same time, in your brain, the adrenaline acts as a neurotransmitter and you become hyper-aware. At the same time, your mind races – a lot of the "situation modeling" structures in the brain run on adrenaline as a neurotransmitter, so your brain starts spinning in circles trying to model a resolution that will end the threat.
Eesh. Sorry, that stressed me out just typing it.
Turns out that this reaction can happen just due to the daily cyclical rhythms of serotonin and adrenaline production, if you’re imbalanced. Do you find that you tend to have panic attacks for no reason, sometimes? Mid-day or in the evening? After a big meal or something sweet? Changes in alertness or in blood composition/pressure can bring on exactly the same reaction. That’s how I get it – my panic attacks are often unprovoked and out of the blue.
When I get one, I remind myself – the thing I am experiencing is a normal response to an overproduction of stress hormones. My ability to evaluate is compromised and my threat assessment isn’t appropriate to the situation. I still end up having the anxiety attack, but – I don’t know, there’s certainly a cognitive difference now. I’m afloat on top of the waves of anxiety. Still experiencing it, but separate from it. It ends sooner and isn’t as bad. Try keeping that in your thoughts as you start having the anxiety attack – the anxiety is a natural implication of the state of your body, You are separate from it.
I hope it works. Let me know!
@Skiriki, eheehee :3
That’s pretty much what Eurisko did, yes. Though the second fleet it put together was considered even more ridiculous – like throwing popcorn at battleships. Your friend has got some serious geek cred!
Thank you for the compliments earlier for those who gave them. Sorry I did not say anything sooner but I’m having a bad brain week. It’s kind of messed up. My thinking is easier when it has to do with conflicts but outside of that and it’s like carrying something heavy, slow and deliberate 😛
@ scildfreja
Wow, thanks for that. I’m sure he’s a nice guy but maybe we need to consider a ‘Miles Dyson’ option; just to make sure.
Speaking of AI related things, you may be interested in a story from the early attempts at using neural networks for military photo interpretation. You can imagine the set up. They basically showed the system thousands of photographs in two batches. One where tanks were present (but hidden) and ones where there were no tanks.
They the asked it to analyse new photos. The results were not encouraging. They eventually worked out why. All the photos with tanks had been taken when it was raining (there may have been a reason for that but it’s not relevant to this point) and all the photos without tanks had been taken when it wasn’t raining.
So basically they’d created a fantastic system that could tell you if it was raining or not.
(Camouflage and computer versus human photo interpretation is a fascinating area. Checkout out the US issue ‘digital’ camo versus the UK MTP camo for example)
@Brony, <3. I hope you are feeling better soon!
@Alan, I'm familiar with the US Army's Adventures in Neural Networks! That story is actually a pretty popular example when teaching the things. Lots of students get enamoured with neural nets of all stripes, because they feel kind of magical – and they sort of are, really. Especially bayesian belief networks. BBNs are usually trotted out as the Algorithm That Can Solve Anything, but… well, you have to be really, really sure that you’re fitting the thing to the right input data. Otherwise you get a lovely weather forecaster and not a very good tank detector. Even if you’re really, really careful about selecting your training set/test set, it’s very hard to know whether you’ve actually trained it on the thing you’re interested in.
case in point: Google Deep Dream turns everything into dogs, because it was trained on dogs. So it doesn’t see the world as the world. It sees The Contiguous Ultrahound.
Be glad that your brain is not trained to look into that dark and terrifying world!
Fascinating thread, and thanks especially to Scildfreja for so much awesome information.
Sounds like Iain M Banks must have been a fan of Eurisko, which might well have been a product of the Culture.
Much appreciated on anxiety attacks, too – I’ll try that approach next time.
About Jake-the-bleak-to-ridiculous: like other trolls I’ve seen, their poor spelling, grammar and phrasing seemed patchy. As they began to escalate, they started not making the same errors as they had in earlier posts.
Possibly some sentences from the familiar MRA/troll talking points were ones they had seen time after time in other sources (or had cut and pasted).
Or they were consciously trying to write as they imagined a poor, formerly homeless, abused, black ex-drug dealer might do, and then dropped it as things got more exciting.
Or they were under influences of various sorts at different times of posting.
Or I’m wrong and it’s all consistent with ordinary sloppy writing/typing/thinking.
I almost feel as if there’s a research project there.
Scildfreja – thanks for the Eurisko story! I am going to look for more information on that.
Regarding ‘mental hygiene’, my parents got us kids a set of instructional, indeed hortatory, booklets on the topic of How Not to be an Asshole. Not the actual title. From table manners to keeping yourself clean, to keeping your temper to keeping from offending or wounding others – looking back, it had a big influence on me. Having six older siblings helped too; there’s no better bargain than learning from someone else’s mistakes.
I like my long hair…can I wear a wig or bun so I don’t have to cut it off?
I just massively fried my hair on my last dye job, so I’m seriously considering a pixie cut now.
A bawdy limericks? Let me try my hand at them:
There was a man who lived once in Sicily
He liked having sex, which he did nilly-willy
His act was erreatic
‘Cause he could shoot static
Electricity out of his willie
They met sunny morning one day in Jaipur
He wanted a lady all over his… spur
But the meeting was rushed
Cause he listen to Roosh
And she throws dirty socks on the floor
I met man in London, who one thing did say:
That apple a day may keep doctors at bay
But cutting hair pixie
Is even more tricksy
‘Cause it scares all the PUA-s away!