A spokesman for one of Harvard University’s most exclusive undergrad social clubs has come up with what may be the most ironic excuse possible for keeping the club an all-male enclave.
In the wake of a report blasting Harvard’s “final clubs,” as they’re known, for their “deeply misogynistic attitudes” and generally rapey atmosphere, the 225-year-old Porcellian Club released a statement saying that it would be a huge mistake for Harvard to force the club to admit women.
Because the men of the club might rape them.
In the statement, emailed to the Harvard Crimson, Charles M. Storey (class of 1982) claimed that the Porcellian Club club has a perfect record when it comes to rape, with “no allegation of sexual assault” ever leveled at the club. (He’s pretty sure.)
But maybe that’s just because there were no women in the club to rape.
Given our policies, we are mystified as to why the current administration feels that forcing our club to accept female members would reduce the incidence of sexual assault on campus, … Forcing single gender organizations to accept members of the opposite sex could potentially increase, not decrease the potential for sexual misconduct.
CHECKMATE, FEMINISTS!
Rapey Harvard boys are rapey.
I agree with douchebro. Clearly, his club should not be integrated; it should be abolished, and the current members required to complete some sensitivity training and consent education before being allowed to return to campus, or, indeed, public life of any sort.
I was just made Benevolent-Dictator-for-Life, right? This could be a bit embarrassing, otherwise.
^ Exactly.
If these guys are so scared that admitting women to the club will make them rapists, then the club shouldn’t exist. Because really: a club for rapists who aren’t rapey as long as there are no women to rape? Logic nohow contrariwise…
Just disband them. I’m serious, they offer nothing of value to society either within or without the university. Harvard would lose nothing but bad PR by dropping this band of pighead fuckers from their campus.
CAPTAIN PICARD I NEED YOU AGAIN!
http://i706.photobucket.com/albums/ww69/skypunch/picard-facepalm.jpg
THANK YOU!
And the not-so-stealth threat is presented.
“Listen, if we let women into this club, we’re just going to rape one or more of them eventually, and we wouldn’t want that. So do yourself a favor, ladies, and keep out so nothing bad happens to you.”
Want to demand some protection money while you’re at it?
I always love how men are allowed to say men are inherently rapey and it’s just good solid man logical science, but if women say we don’t believe men are inherently rapey, but rape culture is a thing and rapists don’t wear signs, therefore we’re on the lookout for red flags, then it’s MISANDRY!!!
I’m not against the idea of a boys club but of all reasons of why you won’t have women in your club, why in the hell would the reason be “we might rape them?’ and yeah like what most of the folks here are saying If that’s the reason these guys won’t admit women into their club then why have the club at all?
*sigh* And yet they can refrain from raping women at work, in elevators, at the park, on the golf course, while dining at restaurants . . . .
Or at least I hope they can.
At this point I expect a number of male members of this club have been sexually assaulted in some way. Jesus.
Yo. Person who answered that question on behalf of the club.
Saying that if women come into your club will make your members rape them… DEFEATS THE ENTIRE FUCKING PURPOSE OF YOUR ARGUMENT FOR STAYING SEGREGATED!
You’re studying at Harvard for fuck’s sake! Or did daddy pay to let you get in?
Y’all are missing the point. It’s not that Charles Storey actually thinks this. It’s not like keeping women out of the club is actually preventing rape, because it’s not like these “gentlemen” have no access to women outside the club. I’m sure Storey understands this perfectly.
No, he just wants to keep women away from the networking functions that these kinds of clubs provide. I’m sure he knows, at a subconscious if not conscious level, that people devalue anything when women are involved in it regardless of whether that makes any sense, and he wants to keep the value of his club high.
What’s outrageous is not that he thinks his club-mates are rapey (which, who knows if they are or not). What’s outrageous is that he thinks that “Hey, my club-mates are rapey” is a more acceptable excuse for the exclusion than “Hey, we just don’t want women to have the same advantages we do.”
He thinks that claiming his club is full of rapists-waiting-to-happen is a better thing to say than explaining that he thinks the presence of women will devalue his club.
That is how acceptable rape is in our society. That is rape culture right there. “Don’t get girls near us because we might rape them” is something this dude thought it was fine to say and that there would be no repercussions for it. Because there probably won’t be. Because women who are raped in college are told they should have known better than to be in a room with a rapist.
PoM: Well said!
@ Policy of Madness: YES! Also, I have an internet crush on you now.
In fact, why don’t we just go back to gender-segregated schools? Great idea!
Very well put, PoM. It goes beyond “we don’t want to have to wear pants in our treehouse”. They want to continue hogging access to the levers of power. It’s a bunch of white dudes from wealthy, powerful families using their connections and influence to raise each other up further. Women (who haven’t yet reached that level of parity) would only dilute that.
It’s clear from Storey’s remarks that these are powerful men relating to women in an unequal, anachronistic, primarily sexual way, and they want to keep it that way. They can’t even entertain the idea that women might want to also network and bond. It’s utterly foreign to them.
No, when they picture women in their club, it’s in the context of parties and rape. Porcellian is an apt name.
Just what the Harvard Porcelain Club (huff, huff, huff) needs: a 50+ year old (did the math) man with a middle fucking initial (the pretentious ass), putting a group he presumably cares about on blast, as potential, and likely rapists. Good job, Chuck!
Also, did he just offer up that opinion, unprovoked? Who even asked this guy? Does he think he’s helping? Good job, Harvard! Taught ’em well
http://www.reactiongifs.us/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/slow_clap_citizen_kane.gif
@PoM
You are so cool right now.
@leftwingfox: Given the initiation ceremonies some fraternal organizations have had over the years…
@freemage A few people in my family went to Ivy League schools and they’re familiar with those gender-exclusive clubs. It does sound like the solution is to ban the clubs, not enforce anti-discrimination policies.
Because everyone knows that when education was segregated no one was ever raped, ever, at all… or if they were, well, at least it wasn’t on school premises right? 😀
As I said on another site, they should all be expelled. They admitted they can’t be trusted around women, so for the safety of other students, they should all be expelled from the school.
How did these fuckwits even get into Harvard in the first place?