Misogynistic men tend to have a rather possessive attitude towards women’s bodies. They often grow quite angry when women deviate from the standards of beauty that these men think they should conform to — by doing everything from gaining weight to getting tattoos and piercings.
It’s as though they believe that women’s bodies don’t really belong to women at all, but to the world’s (heterosexual) men. By “ruining” their looks, these women aren’t just making the straight men of the world sad in their pants; they’re damaging something that these men feel belongs to them.
You may recall the racist PUA Heartiste’s recent complaints that the world’s white women weren’t “exercising good stewardship of their Golden Gashes,” by allowing themselves to get fat and/or sleep with black men. “Stewardship,” is an interesting choice of words here, as the term usually applies to those who take care of a resource that belongs to someone else, or to society as a whole. In other words. all your vagina are belong to us.
Misogynistic men rarely put it quite so baldly, instead preferring to simply attack those women who don’t pay proper obeisance to their notions of what is and isn’t attractive. A lot of this animus is directed at fat women. But it’s also directed at women who break the rules of femininity in more deliberate ways.
Like not shaving their armpits. Some women don’t shave because they don’t really care; some because they’re sick of razor bun; and some because they see it as a small rebellion against conventional femininity — and a way to show themselves and/or the world at large that their bodies are theirs. Regardless of the reasons, misogynists see the unshaven female armpit as an assault on men.
Cue the wailing and gnashing of teeth.
Yes, that’s right, this mememaker thinks that the best way to stand up for all the men who are allegedly being shamed by feminists for not liking armpit hair … is by shaming women with armpit hair.
And no, dudes, you are not required to like armpit hair on women.
Here’s another meme that also tries to play up the phony “double standard” issue.
Shamed for being a neckbeard? I wonder what that’s like.
These guys also have something of an animus towards hair on any other part of a women besides her scalp and possibly that secret place:
Here’s a sentence that has never been uttered by a feminist ever except perhaps in befuddlement after seeing this meme: “Look at that asshole forcing his man beard on my eyes damn shitlord.”
There is no feminist campaign against beards or beardy dudes. Some feminist women like them; some don’t, because that’s how the world works. Different people find different things attractive, and people who aren’t assholes don’t go around attacking those who don’t appeal to them as if these unattractive-to-them people are being unattractive to them out of spite.
Several years ago, feminist YouTube sex educator Laci Green made a similar point, writing on her blog that
body hair is a matter of personal preference! it’s not a matter of “boys do this and girls do this”, and it’s supermega uncool for people to body police those who have a different preference than they do. pffff. fuzzy or hairless, you’re a friggin babe either way.
Alongside this mini-manifesto, she posted this picture, revealing a small puff of hair under one of her arms:
Naturally, the Great Internet Lady Hate Squad decided that they did need to police her body, or at least her body hair:
If women who don’t shave their legs or armpits are seen as poor stewards of their bodies, which really don’t belong to them, then men who don’t stand up against this terrible misandering are traitors to their gender.
That fellow looks awfully familiar, possibly because it’s me. The quote isn’t anything I actually ever said; up until this post I don’t think I’ve ever spoken out on this particular issue, largely because it’s really none of my damn business what women do with their armpits. (Though in the interest of full disclosure I will add that I don’t really care one way or the other.)
Here’s the most revealing armpit hair meme of them all:
Yep, she’s apparently being “selfish” by denying the men of the world a view of her armpit that’s not obstructed by hair.
Dudes, if you’re that interested in seeing shaved armpits, go shave your own, and take a day off from work so you can spend the day staring at it in the mirror.
You know who else doesn’t like women with hairy armpits (in general) and this feminist with hairy armpits (in particular)? White supremacists.
What a weird coincidence, huh?
Y’know I had been thinking to myself this morning that I should shave my pits but, uh, I don’t think I’m gonna any more.
I forget all about my pit hair, for the most part. It’s not like I look there. Unless I’m worried about ticks.
Patti Smith was a good choice for the first photo on this post. She’s the kind of woman who’s looks are invisible-to-enraging to sexists, even though there are a lot of people who find her quite attractive. I mean, the intense eyes.
http://nme.assets.ipccdn.co.uk/images/article_x4/2014PattiSmith_Getty94101385100314.jpg
The androgyny.
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/7188XIPRTsL._SL1069_.jpg
And now the silver hair.
http://www.pattismith.net/i/news/mtrain_author.jpg
Yeah, I kind of have a crush.
If I were a woman who shaved anywhere, I would be tempted to stop just to cause sad MRA boners.
I google image searched with “razor bun” and what came up was a bunch of people with an awesome haircut. (I know it was a typo but I needed to erase the image of a bun filled with razors, because THAT is no dessert).
I’ve come up close with the feminist issue of body hair of late. I’ve gained a Mr. Atomica recently and he is a kick-ass feminist, but he did say one thing: He doesn’t find leg hair on women appealing. I’m not going to force him to and we both do things to appear attractive to eachother, but a part of me went all “Hmmm, what if I stop shaving my legs?”.
I’m not the thinnest or prettiest of women and yet this very good-looking man is super serial about me, so I don’t think it’s a matter of superficiality but a personal preference. So I can live with it I suppose. But still, a part of me went “LEG HAIR ANARCHY!!!”.
More memes about strawfeminists. I wonder if Nationalist Woman has her armpit hair styled into her national flag or swaztikas.
I think it probably says something good about me that every time I read about [current thing enraging dumbasses], I find myself saying to myself, “What?”
I mean… armpit hair? What? Who could possibly care? Who could interpret SOMEONE ELSE’S armpit hair as, what, a threat? A message? An insult? It betrays a towering narcissism, that everything other people do should be about US and what WE WANT, and apparently, those narcissist boneheads find axillary hair a grave insult. How weird.
I’m a pretty hairless person, and even when I do grow body hair it is so blonde and fine that it’s not noticeable unless you are literally inches from my legs.
That being said, who fucking cares. Some days I dress up and I’m a bombshell. Other days it’s ugly Disney pyjama pants and Birkenstocks. That’s my choice. I don’t exist for these guys, or anyone else. And actually, I bought myself a beautiful corset the other day, and the woman at the sex shop was surprised when I said that my husband doesn’t like lingerie. I bought it cause I like it… This is apparently revolutionary that I would be sexy for me Instead of sexy for somebody else
@LindsayIrene
Thanks! I needed Patti Smith fangirl moment.
Now excuse me, I’m dancing barefoot.
I’m so glad I haven’t been shaving for the past few months.
I love beards on dudes, and I love dudes without beards. But mostly, it’s none of my damn business what dudes do with their facial/body hair because I am not an entitled asshat like MRAs. Why can’t they extend women the same courtesy?
Even more so, why can’t they treat us the same way they do their dudely dude friends/men in general? You don’t see them policing other mens’ body hair. Even if they disapprove of a personal style choice of a certain man or certain men, they don’t say a damn word to them about it. Because to them, only men are full people with the complete right to control their own bodies. Women are just toys for society to pick apart and play with as much as they like.
Also, I don’t understand the “unhygienic” argument about female body hair. How is it any more unhygienic than male body hair, AKA not unhygienic at all? As long as women wash themselves (which most people who have access to showers or baths do) then how is body hair unclean? And how is it any more unnatural than male body hair when they both, you know, occur there naturally?
Manurespherians ain’t exactly deep thinkers, are they? Buuuut that’s been established.
If this shit is misandry, I’d hate to see the reaction these dudes would have to an actually hairy woman’s pits. Shaving is the first thing to go when I’m having a depressive spell, and if it lasts a month I look like I’ve got a pair of tribbles under my arms.
My SIL is Danish & I’ve traveled through Northern Europe with her & way more women in Sweden, Denmark, German etc don’t shave their armpits there than I have ever seen in the USA. Also even fewer of the blonde very few shave their legs even as the hairs are hard to see they don’t see the point.
Sweeping generalization & anecdotal evidence I know but boy are those white supremacists in for a shock if they ever actually I dunno travel & see more of the world than what ever room their computers are in.
I’m kind of a sporadic shaver so the only hair I remove with any regularity is that one annoying long black one on my chin I’ve had since I turned 16 . ..stupid hormones.
@LindsayIrene
Wow, she’s hot! X3
Starting to fangirl myself a little here. Don’t mind me.
@Wwaxwork
I am from Finland and my mum and grandmothers didn’t care about body hair. And they are/were all women who otherwise took an effort to look good, which makes me think they just did it for themselves. Body hair was not a huge taboo in Finland (and we see eachother naked all the time because sauna culture), but it has become an issue lately. The culture has changed so that body hair on women is more shameful and you should at least consider getting rid of it, or be ridiculed. I know there are other Finns/Nordics here. Care to confirm if attitudes have changed in recent years or was this just my family? I know there’s always been *some* expectation for women to shave but I feel it’s gotten worse lately.
Aren’t manospherians into evopsych? If gender roles are good because they evolved naturally, than female body hair is good because it evolved naturally too. I don’t know when razors were first invented and when women started using them, but I’m pretty confident that paleolithic women had body hair and men still banged them.
@Leda Atomica, get some nice shaving soap, the kind you apply with a soft brush. Let Mr Atomica shave your legs for you.
David Futrelle,
Yes! Women are murdering men with their unshaven armpits, just as interracial couples are murdering white babies by having black on white sex.
Just wanted to note quickly that I used to have an LP of Patti Smith’s ‘Easter’ and on the cover, someone had drawn a blue-ballpoint arrow pointing towards her armpit hair and then the word “Gross!” Doesn’t really add much insight, I know, but when else will I get to talk about it?
@Iseult The Idle
I just don’t need the bleeding.
@ Leda Atomica
First of all, moikka. (Could not resist.)
Unfortunately I have to confirm your suspicions (also for the Fennoswedish parts of the country). Things have changed here, and on such a short notice at that! My grandparents never understood it, and neither do I…
Also, I have to say: @Makroth, love your avatar! Sphynxes! <3
It is totally normal for people to modify their grooming somewhat based on the preferences of their loved ones. The below is not at all meant to be a judgement on your Mr. Atomica, just a reaction:
So my first thought upon reading this was — I’ve never dated someone who was my physical ideal in every way. Everyone has had features that were more or less appealing to me. It’s the whole package that I’m dating, not just a collection of features.
So when strangers on the internet are like, hairy legs aren’t appealing! Hairy armpits aren’t appealing! I’m like, well, blonde hair isn’t appealing to me, nor is acne, or big front teeth, or a flat butt, or hair in a crew cut, but people aren’t having those features at me, and I would never decline to date someone or call someone gross for having them. I wouldn’t criticize them for these features. If they were considering changing one of them and they asked my opinion I would give it, but seriously though…
… we all have features that are appealing or unappealing to different people, and it is pretty normal for people to date people who aren’t their total physical ideal, so in the end, who cares?
I have hypersensitivity and the hair on my armpits and legs grows to a length that literally tickles me. I shave so I feel more comfortable, not because I’m worried about what men think of my appearance. I’m guess that would make me a selfish, misandric b*tch, no?
@hugseverycat
I think in the very same way. I’ve never been into someone just because their features perfectly match my idea of “attractive”. People become attractive to me as a whole if they are, well, attractive as a person. I know Mr. Atomica would never toss me aside for having leg hair, in a weird way he would probably find it attractive if I stopped shaving just to show him off. 😀
But it’s just that I have such a huge issue with body policing that this comment was enough to make me consider about my personal grooming.
@Blerkathon
Moikka!
And now I have the image of a ninja woman garroting men from the shadows with her braided pit hair….
Is there a non-porn version of Rule 34?
@Button,
I hear you on the tribbles. My tribbles are set to go in a couple of weeks when I’ll be wearing my first sleeveless dress of the year to a party.
Regarding the origins of shaving body hair, I believe it was Romans who got hooked on all that kind of thing; though I think the men went in for it too.