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Dudes! If you’re friends with a lady, “you’re a vagina,” explains Reddit lady expert

Dogzoned!
Dogzoned!

Fellas! Do you have any female friends? Do you hang out with them without having sex?

Well, apparently you’re doing it all wrong, at least according to the world-class relationship expert and Red Pill Redditor Throwaway244555. In a recent post on the Red Pill subreddit, he explained the fundamental rule of male-female friendships, which is that there should be no male-female friendships.

Woman are friends with woman, and they have sex with men. So if you’re her friend, you’re a vagina.

Remember, fellas, women are for sex, so if one of them wants to Netflix and chill without the chill part, tell her she’ll have to Netflix alone. By the way, “chill” in this context means sex. Like coffee, Netflix and chill means sex. And may not involve Netflix at all.

You ask this girl to be your gf, she rejects you but ask if we can still be friends. That’s a insult, she thinks less of you.

If a woman likes you, Mr. Throwaway244555 contends, she will let you put your penis in her. If she says she likes you yet is not interested in your penis she is insulting you to your very core. And if you actually do become friends with her, you are failing so utterly as a man that you might as well be a vagina.

A male and female aren’t suppose to be friends, they’re suppose to be love intrest. So basically you’re a vagina, because girls are suppose to be friends with girls, and fuck men. Also girls are horrible friends, all they do is leech off you, and cause drama.

So when a girl rejects you, and puts you in the friendzone, it’s a insult. Next time she says let’s just be friends, say no thank you.

DO NOT LET HER ROPE YOU IN WITH HER TALK OF “FRIENDSHIP.”

Or, I dunno, you could just go ahead and be friends with her, and look elsewhere for sex and/or romance?

I mean, sure, if you’re in love with a woman who isn’t in love with you, you’ll probably do the both of you a favor if you move on instead of taking her friendship as a “consolation prize,” which is really a shitty thing to consider a friendship to be.

Or if you decide to become “friends” with a woman because you hope to eventually manipulate her into having sex with you, well, that’s pretty shitty too. So stop it, and move on.

All this applies as well with the genders reversed, and in same-sex couples, and indeed in any gender variation possible.

But Jesus H. Christ, dudes, you can be friends with a woman if you want to. You can be friends with her if you don’t want to have sex with her. And you can be friends with her even if you sorta do.

I mean, seriously, dudes, you know that gay men are friends with other gay men that they never actually have sex with, right?

That said, if you’re a Red Pill dude, I would strongly suggest you not become friends with any women at all until you cease to be a Red Pill dude.

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RosaDeLava
RosaDeLava
4 years ago

If vagina is an insult, why does this dude wants to stick his dick in them?

Lea
Lea
4 years ago

No woman ever wanted him for a friend. He’s talking out his ass.

Charles Miller
4 years ago

I’m more concerned about what’s going on in that photo at the top.

Is it the dog is saying that to the woman about the guy? Is the woman saying it to the dog about the guy? Or is one of the humans saying it to the other human about the dog? Is the last one more likely because it’s the best explanation why the dog looks so desperate to get away from both of them?

I’m confused.

Victorious Parasol
Victorious Parasol
4 years ago

This sort of “reasoning” was more entertaining when delivered by Billy Crystal during When Harry Met Sally.

mcbender
4 years ago

Here’s an excerpt from an actual conversation my partner and I had after reading this:

“You know, most people tend not to befriend their genitalia.”

“Well, it’s the only friend most MRAs have.”

“True. I’m sure they give them names and try to have conversations. If they want to use it as a ventriloquist dummy, do you think they have to stick an arm up their own ass?”

Tyra Lith
Tyra Lith
4 years ago

Okay okay, but now I really need to know whose vagina I have been hanging out with all this time.
Because I really think I should tell this person about it, they might miss their body part.

Dizzy
Dizzy
4 years ago

This sort of nonsense always confuses me because it’s so clear that no one bothered to ask actual women what they think, they just manufactured an idea of what women might or might not be like then ascribed a bunch of theories to them.

Like, if I turn a man down but don’t intend to insult him, is it still a grave insult? If I don’t actually think less of men when I turn them down, am I responsible for what that man decides to imagine I said? Do I need to inform all my male friends that they’ve changed gender by magic, or am I supposed to assume that they’re waiting until I have a fight with my boyfriend so they can capitalize on my moment of weakness (sexfully)?

I can’t even argue with it because there isn’t a whole lot to argue about. I can’t even say “So, datum point of one, I actually like my male friends” because of course I’m a lady, so anything that comes out of my mouth is automatically lies.

I will say that one thing I love about MRA nonsense is this idea that it’s super easy to change gender. I know my trans friends would love that. No need for expensive surgeries or hormones, all ya need is to be rejected by a lady! Don’t worry, your vagina starter kit will be mailed to you in 7-10 business days.

brian
brian
4 years ago

“she will let you put her penis in her.”
This sounds . . . difficult.

lkeke35
lkeke35
4 years ago

Silly David! Of course gay men can’t be friends with other gay men without sex! What a silly doodle you are to ask such a question.

If women can only be friends with women, and straight men can only be friends with straight men, then it stands to reason, that gay people don’t actually exist.

You see: the Hypotenuse of A + 12 = cookie.
Am I making sense now? (Certainly about as much sense as the above statements by Mr. Redpiller.)

Viscaria
Viscaria
4 years ago

A male and female aren’t suppose to be friends, they’re suppose to be love intrest.

This guy sounds like he’d be a real fun boyfriend. I love dating people who can’t imagine spending time with me unless I get naked on a regular basis.

Tessa
Tessa
4 years ago

So basically you’re a vagina, because girls are suppose to be friends with girls, and fuck men.

Why does he have to say girls instead of women, when he already says men? They either have to dehumanize women with “feeeemales” or infantilize with “girls.” Would it kill them to use words that put them on the same level? Hahaha I’m kidding. Of course it would.

Also, this is rather telling. I’m sure if you think of women… I’m sorry girls as only having one use and have no respect for them as people, of course they’re not going to want to be their friend.

But anyway, I have to agree with David. Guys! By all means, say “no thank you” and bail out right away! That’d be awesome! Save her the trouble of your creepy, disingenuous, seething, faux friendship! Win win!

lkeke35:

If women can only be friends with women, and straight men can only be friends with straight men, then it stands to reason, that gay people don’t actually exist.

He also said that women… Dangit girls are supposed to fuck men… So obviously lesbians don’t exist. Stands to reason men are supposed to fuck women… Dangit girls. (Of course, these guys often have different standards for men than women, so who knows?). I feel myself phasing out of existence as I type this.

Paradoxical Intention - Resident Cheeseburger Slut

comment image

This is always relevant to “friendzone” conversations. Always.

But I’m seconding Tessa here: If y’all think my friendship is an “insult” then by all means do fuck off, because I wouldn’t fuck a RedPiller (or any one for that matter) who only sees me as a Penis Socket and nothing more.

Not every person with a vagina is going to swoon over your particular brand of “Alpha Male” and beg you to fuck them, doodz.

zesty
zesty
4 years ago

I’m surprised that he just accidentally acknowledged that women have friends at all. Don’t they usually think that most women hate other women and see them as rivals?

WeirwoodTreeHugger
WeirwoodTreeHugger
4 years ago

I love how he just so casually reduces both men and women to their genitalia.

I’m seconding the opinion that no woman
actually wants to be his friend.

lacerta viridis
lacerta viridis
4 years ago

What if I’m friends with a gay man, though? Is he a penis? Am I a penis? I’m so confused.

Number Sequence
Number Sequence
4 years ago

Well, Mr. Throwaway picked an appropriate name since his opinion clearly belongs in the trash.

Easy jokes aside, it must be hard having all your personality be between your legs because if you consider, “I don’t want to sleep with you,” is an insult, you clearly consider your dick to be all your worth.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
4 years ago

WWTH: I’m not certain that any man would want to be his friend either.

Viscaria
Viscaria
4 years ago

Seriously though, someone not wanting to date you is absolutely not insulting. It can be disappointing, it can make you sad, but it’s not an insult. Most of the people we meet in our lives are people we don’t date.

maghavan
maghavan
4 years ago

If she says she likes you yet is not interested in your penis she is insulting you to your very core.

Well, obviously.

Penises are like Icebergs. That part you see outside is actually only the tiny external part of the much larger Penis that lies below the surface and literally forms the core of men (and like 50% of their body mass).

Therefore, when you reject a man’s penis you are insulting his very core.

Bina
4 years ago

Also girls are horrible friends, all they do is leech off you, and cause drama.

Translation: Throwaway Boy here is a horrible friend; all he does is leech off women and cause drama with his poor sad widdle boner.

Bina
4 years ago

Okay okay, but now I really need to know whose vagina I have been hanging out with all this time.
Because I really think I should tell this person about it, they might miss their body part.

I think it might belong to Wanda Sykes:

Regford
Regford
4 years ago

I’m too old to perform and I always was a lousy lay, also massively unsuccessful with the ladies. Although, now, my “Lion in Winter” act does get modest attention.
My friend Brian has been very successful over the decades. He shared this wisdom with me: “Reg, it’s terrible out there, they all do; they all do. And if they’re not doing it with you then they’re probably doing it with me.” He also said that is astounding what women will do, but I proffer no specifics.
If she identifies as a feminist, that translates to ‘single’, welcome to modern times jargon.
Straight guys gotta do it like the gays do, suggest sex with almost anything that moves. Some want to, most don’t. Meet for a couple of coffee dates and make clear what you have in mind. It’s either yes, no, or you have someone new you can discuss the latest smartphone app with. Just remember that if you were aware in detail about the young lovely’s sexual history, you would not be so nervous in your approach.
I hope I haven’t violated too many community guidelines.

Bina
4 years ago

I always was a lousy lay, also massively unsuccessful with the ladies.

After hearing the rest of that, I’m not surprised.

WeirwoodTreeHugger
WeirwoodTreeHugger
4 years ago

Because all “the gays” are promiscuous. That’s exactly how life works. So many gay men were only thrilled to marry their partners when it became legal because um…uh… they wanted to destroy the sanctity of marriage? They live to force fundamentalists to bake cakes for gay weddings?

Viscaria
Viscaria
4 years ago

Reg, it’s terrible out there, they all do; they all do.

That really does sound terrible, Reg. I had no idea. 2 quick questions though: 1) who are they 2) what do they do.

Bina
4 years ago

Just remember that if you were aware in detail about the young lovely’s sexual history, you would not be so nervous in your approach.

Oh sure. Because if she’s had sex with any guy, even just one, she must therefore be open to it with ALL the guys, including YOU?

Your “friend” is full of shit.

Steampunked
Steampunked
4 years ago

Okay, but hear me out…does the existence of parents now mean that adults who have become friends with their parents must change sex depending on which one they are talking to?

Or is the OP a clownfish?

Viscaria
Viscaria
4 years ago

I missed that Regford describes himself both as “too old to perform” and “a lion in winter,” but he is talking about approaching “young lovelies,” because of course.

Wetherby
Wetherby
4 years ago

If she identifies as a feminist, that translates to ‘single’, welcome to modern times jargon.

Pretty much all of my female friends identify as feminist and most of them are either married or in very long-term monogamous relationships.

Just remember that if you were aware in detail about the young lovely’s sexual history, you would not be so nervous in your approach.

“The young lovely”? What are you, 95?

Steampunked
Steampunked
4 years ago

It is pretty astounding what women will do, like suppressing hormonal changes in their sisters so only they can lay workers for the hive. Women produce hundreds of eggs a day, to be laid in a nutrient rich jelly secreted by their sisters. Women who don’t have sex with men only produce male children. Women collect protein stores to raise young in winter. Women have ovipositors that have evolved into stings.

WeirwoodTreeHugger
WeirwoodTreeHugger
4 years ago

Also, lovely is an adjective
Using it like a noun is similar to calling women females.

That is, it’s dehumanizing.

Lea
Lea
4 years ago

If you know she is getting good dick on the regular, you better be nervous if you’re a lousy lay. Sombody has it all twisted.

I was a feminist married. I’m still a feminist. Gonna die a feminist.

Meanwhile, do these men not realize they are what make straight ladies reluctant to take a chance on a new lover?

Oh…wait…they do. That’s why they sabotage other men. They want everybody to go without like them.

Lea
Lea
4 years ago

Also…terrible? Its terrible women are fucking?

But its also sad they aren’t fucking you?

Dude.
Duuuuude.
Wake. Up.

Viscaria
Viscaria
4 years ago

Yeah. I do appreciate the vocabulary lesson, Grandpa, but I know feminists who are single, feminists in monogamous relationships, and feminists who aren’t single but who are open to new sexual and/or romantic partners. Some of those feminists are ace, some of them are lesbians, some of them are bi women with very little or no interest in men.

I’d say you have about equal chances with all of them.

tricyclist
tricyclist
4 years ago

Regford:
Stop being a DICK

everyone else:
Sorry – been binging on old episodes of “The Last Leg”

throwaway
throwaway
4 years ago

How dare they besmirch my good name.

Tyra Lith
Tyra Lith
4 years ago

@Bina

I think it might belong to Wanda Sykes:

Love. it. 😀

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
4 years ago

He also said that is astounding what women will do, but I proffer no specifics.

“The young lovelys are so much looser these days. Some of them like to ankle over to the speakeasy and then pet with college boys in the back of a Hupmobile. Hubba hubba! 23 skidoo!”

Regford
Regford
4 years ago
Reply to  Lea

Wow, I am impressed with this site’s anti-troll defenses. There are far too many hits for me to reply to, so you should just imagine what I might have said in reply, and be miffed at that.

I apologize for saying feminist just means single. It actually means ‘I want a raise’.

Even if I were young enough to perform, I think I would not bother. God gave us hands that reach to the knees for a reason. With age I have realized that sex (and women) are overrrated, and I don’t want to do anything icky. And all forms of sex are icky. especially that gay stuff, can you imagine??? If I were young again I would never ask a girl for her number, I would only ask for her 1-800 number and keep love commercial, and helping the economy.

Anyway my buddy Brian, if you met him you’d know I’m a liar, not that nice man, can’t be like that…. I met a goodly number of his dates, but I declined to play. He specialized in prosperous Chinese girls in their late 30’s. He summarized it in an empirical theorem that I think is generally true “If you’re not doing it by the third date, what’s the point,”.
Sorry, that’s all the time I have to troll today. So this gives you more time to develop really stinging barbs. I look forward to them. Until then, Jesus and I love you all. Party on.

weirwoodtreehugger
4 years ago

Meh. Boring trolling. He couldn’t even keep up the pretense of sincerely being an aging nice guy for two whole posts. Weak.

NickNameNick
NickNameNick
4 years ago

Um, aren’t these the same guys who act disgusted by the notion of having sex with “uggos” and “fatties” even if they had a chance to? Funny how selective their completely arbitrary bullshit reasoning is…

Oh, wait, no it isn’t. They’re shitheads.

Viscaria
Viscaria
4 years ago

I apologize for saying feminist just means single. It actually means ‘I want a raise’.

Ah, finally, something true. I would fucking love a raise. Do anti-feminists not want raises?

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
4 years ago

Why does he have to say girls instead of women, when he already says men? They either have to dehumanize women with “feeeemales” or infantilize with “girls.” Would it kill them to use words that put them on the same level? Hahaha I’m kidding. Of course it would.

With one exception: If they’re 8-16, then they’re “Women.”

calmdown
calmdown
4 years ago

Ugh, @Reg. There seem to be a lot of trolls that post here that don’t really have any point to make other than to try and make us feel bad that they never got laid. Aside from the fact that it just proves how entitled they think they are to get laid, what are they trying to accomplish? Some of them seem like genuine attempts to get attention by “negging” or getting women to talk to them out of pity (I know all readers aren’t women but they assume many will be since it’s a feminist blog) or some other creepy PUA BS? I are they really trying to pick up women HERE? Maybe the entire world/internet is just one giant pickup bar to them? I guess it’s mostly a grab for attention, or to intentionally be super creepy to annoy us? Both? I honestly don’t get it, and I probably never will.

Moocow
4 years ago

That ‘men’ vs. ‘girls’ dichotomy shows up so often but never has it been so blatant and in the same exact sentence.

girls are suppose to be friends with girls, and fuck men.

And of course, one of the commandments of the red pill is that 'women should be treated like children'.

Fortunately, the red pill is a cesspool of filth with mods who work tirelessly to silence any dissenting opinion, a disclaimer that says "you are not a part of our treehouse, please respect our lack of respect for women by not downvoting" (I may have paraphrased it a little bit) so it's quite cathartic to mock them.

Unfortunately, these attitudes are far too common in our society and they are very toxic:

You ask this girl to be your gf, she rejects you but ask if we can still be friends. That’s a insult, she thinks less of you

What a dangerous cocktail (emphasis on the cock part) of toxic masculinity and victim-blaming.

So according to toxic masculinity, your success as a mayun is determined by your ability to ‘score’ sexual partners. As such, it’s usually ‘if she rejects you, you’ve failed the test of manliness’. There are plenty of varients, but the main message is always the same: If you got a rejection, it’s because you, the man, did something ‘wrong’. Implying that there was some sort of Konami code of that, if you had said it, she totally would have said yes. I’ve seen it, I’ve heard it and I’m determined to convince as many guys as will listen to me that this literal objectification of women is toxic as fuck.

But Throwaway123, like most misogynists, blame women for the effects of toxic masculinity. Thus, if he feels upset or emasculated by getting rejected, it’s her fault. Suddenly the harrowing tales of ‘when women say no’ start to make a scary amount of sense.

A male and female aren’t suppose to be friends, they’re suppose to be love intrest.

But of course, movies and TV don’t influence how people think about women at all! And the fact that most writers are male writing from a male perspective and assuming a male audience totally isn’t biased at all!

/s

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
4 years ago

@ buttercup

Now I’ve got a craving for some Damon Runyon.

Sara
4 years ago

What do these guys do about the female members of their families?????????????????????????????

Sara
4 years ago

What do these guys do about the female members of their families?

Unlucky Blackjack
Unlucky Blackjack
4 years ago

I’m confused by his logic. If you’re a friends with a women, but you don’t have sex with her, you’re a vagina. Does that mean if a gay guy is friends with a women, he’s a vagina? What if a gay woman is friends with another woman, but doesn’t have sex with her. What if two gay people, regardless of gender, are friends but are not having sex? Is there a chart or a graph that MRAs have that I can look at, if only to get this straight. Because I can’t seem to wrap my head around their logic. It’s almost as if they don’t have any internal consistency or logic to speak of. But that can’t be it, MRAs are know for being some of the most intelligent, thoughtful, polite people who are not at all racist/sexiest/xenophobic/homophobic/ just terrible.

EDIT: Sara brought up something I didn’t even think of. What about families. It’s like they expect to have sex with anything with a vagina, even if it’s their fami-Oh. I get it now.

Dr. NicolaLuna
Dr. NicolaLuna
4 years ago

He also said that is astounding what women will do, but I proffer no specifics.

Here are some specific astounding things women do.
1. Eat the head of their mate (yummy)
2. Do 90% of the hunting
3. Have 3 vaginas
4. Hunt with spears, altering how scientists see animal behaviour.

Admittedly I may have got muddled up with female animal facts.

Ooohhh, wait. Is Reg talking about sex? Yeah I’m pretty sure most people know that women like sex. This isn’t a 1950s sitcom.

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