Every Friday is Memeday here at We Hunted the Mammoth, but this week I’m going to start the celebration a day early, with a collection of “told you so!” memes I found, mostly, on Men’s Rights and other antifeminist Facebook pages.
Now, most of us human beings enjoy a bit of Schadenfreude now and then; it’s not the most noble of emotions, but it’s kind of hard to resist laughing a little when some horrible person gets their comeuppance.
Men’s Rights Activists are a pretty bitter and immature bunch, so it’s hardly a shock to see them giggling away at other people’s misfortunes. But it’s still a bit surprising to see just how many of the memes they create and/or pass along are little more than meanspirited “told you sos.”
Even more striking is how many of them offer up a sort of future-tense Schadenfreude. They’re not laughing because some feminist they hate has gotten their comeuppance; they’re laughing at the possibility that this feminist will get their comeuppance some time in the future. And I don’t think I’m wrong to see a sort of anxious desperation underlying these memes; I think on some level most MRAs know their Schadenfreudy fantasies aren’t going to come true.
The meme posted at the top of the page — I posted it before in a roundup of memes from A Voice for Men — is a visual representation of the rather tired claim, repeated endlessly by MRAs, that feminist women will end up dying alone surrounded by a small army of cats.
It’s not clear to me exactly why MRAs find this prediction quite so hilarious. Women tend to live longer than men, which means that even the most staunchly antifeminist women are likely to outlive their partners, giving them pretty much the same chance of ending up “alone” late in their lives, at least if they have no family or friends outside of their late husbands.
But for some reason there aren’t a lot of feminists sitting around cackling at the thought of GirlWritesWhat dying alone at some date in the not-so-near future. Because that’s petty, and tacky, and mean.
In addition to being a stony-hearted bunch, MRAs also tend to be a bit impatient, and like to imagine their sworn feminist enemies having their Waterloos long before they get to the age of seventy.
And so MRAs fantasize about feminists having a sudden realization that they were wrong and the MRAs were right — shortly after hitting age 30 or whenever it is that modern misogynists like to imagine that women magically turn into pumpkin-faced uggos.
Dudes, only MRAs, misogynists and pedophiles think that a woman’s “best years” are in her teens and early 20s.
By why wait for these imaginary feminists to have some sort of drastically premature mid-life crisis when you can just pretend that they’ll all be miserable just as soon as they graduate from college with their women’s studies degrees.
Whoever made this meme picked an awfully cheerful-looking woman to represent a young feminist brokenhearted over having to work at Subway.
But women don’t have to work in food service to be miserable, the mememakers insist. Having to work ANY job at all is going to make them regret their feminism. Because apparently, before feminism came along, women were pampered creatures who slept all day on silk sheets, surrounded by bon-bon wrappers and an assortment of tiny dogs, while their husbands worked 25-hour-days in the salt mines.
Huh. Somehow I missed the part where feminism told women that working in an office was the closest thing to paradise on earth
Then there’s this tired trope, a lovely example of misogynoir turned into a meme by a black MRA cartoonist I first noticed on DeviantArt a couple of years ago.
And let’s end this survey of future-tense schadenfreude with a meme that somehow manages to work in two historical cartoons I really like and that I think I’ve posted here before.
I’m going to say, “yes,” except perhaps the portion of her life she spent married to a dickhead.
And because the first two cartoons there deserve better than to be shoved into a dopey antifeminist meme, let’s look at them in all their full-sized glory.
We love you, kickass suffragette girl!
This cartoon was originally intended as anti-suffragette propaganda, but, seriously, that girl is AWESOME.
Looking through the collection of anti-sufragette cartoons featured on the post I linked to above, I noticed another one that shows pretty clearly just how ancient and utterly unoriginal the “you feminists will all die alone” trope really is.
See, wanting the vote makes women UGLY!
Is is even necessary to point out the obvious: that despite all the mean cartoons they inspired, the suffragettes WON.
And here’s that other cartoon, of more recent vintage:
Wait, is that redhaired gal dating Carl Sagan?
oh– a lot of people already figured out the axe thing, whoops.
WWTH, I hope your surgery goes smoothly and your recovery is swift.
@ ashara
That case takes on a new significance if you know that the authors’ publishers indemnified them for legal costs; and that in both cases that was Random House.
I’m sure they did it for moral reasons though to establish the truth, and the fact that both books sold additional millions as a result of the trial is just a coincidence.
(The judge played along and there is a coded message in his judgement)
@Falconer
Your three-year-olds are sooo cute!
Nthing praises to Falconer’s adorable kids.
@WWTH
Good luck with the wisdom teeth!
I was prescribed codeine when mine were removed. It took me a while to figure out I’d rather have the discomfort than the wooziness.
I’d rather be 70 and lonely than 70 and dealing with a selfish, brutal, power-tripping, ignorant lout.
But that’s just me.
Ugh, teeth problems are the worst. All my best wishes / hugs, WWTH.
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Yeah, this is a bit strange. As MGTOW foster to avoid women, they are also likely going to remain alone till the last step. For people claming to be logical, it is weird… Well, some pseudo-scientists explain all with the “plasma” stuff, i guess this people explain all their problem with “feminism”…
@daeros
Ha, ha! Your plan is brilliant!
Woman haters! Driving women into the arms of other men–not to mention the arms of other people of all genders–since the first woman hater started to hate.
@Kat:
Hah! Yes.
I like to think that the very first proto-MRA was being literal when he said “I hunted the mammoth for you.” He went out there and killed something huge in order to get the attention of a woman who didn’t like him, and she still didn’t reward him with sex? Well, fine. See if he bothers inventing fire for her.
As many people have pointed out in various ways – women are much better at growing older alone. Lone men are much less healthy in every way. Widows do better than widowers, divorced women do better than divorced men. There are lots and lots of reasons for this, and Toxic Masculinity is right in the middle.
MGTOW in the long term is likely to produce poorer outcomes for men’s health – it already does without the silly ‘movement’ – and as these men are so resentful and obsessed with hating women it is likely that they will actually be worse off than the current generation. But I also expect they will be such a small group that they will be statistically insignificant.
@EJ (The Other One)
I like to think that the very first proto-MRA was being literal when he said “I hunted the mammoth for you.” He went out there and killed something huge in order to get the attention of a woman who didn’t like him, and she still didn’t reward him with sex? Well, fine. See if he bothers inventing fire for her.
Hilarious!
And I must point out that MRAs have certainly devolved since the first one strode this earth.
Your proto-MRA was actually kind of reasonable. He brought her a gift, a very useful one. When she rejected him again, his feelings were hurt, but he refrained from calling her names, threatening her, or attacking her. I almost like him.
When I was contractor for the VA, one of my jobs was time update their emergency contact information. It was common for them to be widowed and remarried within the span of a year. A lot of older men just can’t be alone. I think a lot of it is that older men never learned to take care of a home. They were taught that cooking, cleaning, organizing and the like we’re women’s work. There are apparently still a lot of young men that go from having their mom do their chores and run their lives to having their wives do it. Luckily, I don’t know any of these men, but apparently they’re out there.
I don’t know that it’s just that, though. My parents are in their early 60s and divorced about 15 years ago. My mom is perfectly happy being single and living with just – gasp! – her cat. My dad, not so much. He’s been a serial monogamist since. The year since his fiancee died has been the longest he’s been without female companionship. But he’s completely capable of doing his own housework and cooking. So I think men are also socialized to be emotionally dependent on women.
I think these memes are part of a larger culture that sends women the message that we should fear being alone precisely because men need us more than we need them. Part of male privilege is that men get to sign over both domestic and emotional labor to the women in their lives. If women decide marriage is an option we only take if we want to, out of love. Men increasingly have to do it themselves. So it becomes necessary to use scare tactics to make sure we volunteer to stay in our right places as the caretakers of men. I think the fact that more and more women are seeing that relationships should have equality in not just who has paid jobs but who does everything else is a huge part of manosphere rage.
Some commenters asked “Where are all these old feminists regretting feminism?”
Well I have a better answer, here is an old PUA melting down as he ages:
http://www.vocativ.com/news/279467/infamous-pickup-artist-mystery-has-epic-facebook-meltdown/?utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=CPC&utm_campaign=CK-VOC-TRF-M02-FB-FBLP-FKW-ENG.W-MED-BO-18p-M38
Yeah, I dated a guy in his mid-thirties whose mom would drive out every weekend from her home ~200 miles away to do his chores for him. He didn’t do any of his own laundry. She treated him like he was a teenager in pretty much every way. For those keeping score, it’s the same ex who suggested I shouldn’t cook or clean because gender roles, much like our recently flounced troll.
I also had a coworker whose mom got tired of his place being messy whenever she would visit that she bought him a maid service. He was in his late twenties, I believe.
@dreemr
When I was in my 20s I thought I “should” be in a romantic relationship because that was what you were supposed to do. However, I never put a whole lot of effort into it and it’s only now that I’m in my 40s that I’ve come to the realization that I’m aromantic. The idea of being in a romantic relationship and especially living with someone makes my shoulders go up around my ears. Instead, I’m living happily by myself with my two cats and my life is good.
@Mortarius
Yikes, I was wondering about him recently. His poor poor kids. Pick up Granny? Shudder.
I remember him as being tame in comparison to, say, Roosh, but it seems he’s pretty close in awfulness.
@chesselwitt – glad you realized that and are good with it! I think it definitely gets easier to know what you want out of life when you get a little older. Here’s to building the life YOU want and that makes you happiest!
To continue the MGTOW – wisdom teeth analogy, they both have apocryphal names. Wisdom teeth aren’t wise and MGTOWs aren’t actually going their own way!
Okay. I’ll stop obsessing about wisdom teeth now.
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Oh! Oh! I know this one!!
You see, MGTOWs aren’t spending their time and money on hypergamous women* during their most productive years. This means they’ll be able to have amazing homes, sweet rides, and fat bank accounts in their dotage, which everyone** knows is like catnip to the young HB10s, who will flock to them like they do to Charlie Sheen!
So, 70 for wimmen means cats and loneliness and 70 for MGTOWs means Playboy mansion lite. Got it?
*who don’t want them, anyway
**who reads their nonsense
@ Kat
I’ve come to the conclusion that I must have some messed up cell receptors, because opiods do nothing for me. At one time or another I’ve been prescribed just about everything, and they don’t touch me- no pain relief, no sleepiness, nothing. Pretty much the only pain med that helps me is ibuprofen which means I’m screwed if anything ever happens to my liver and I can’t take it any more.
I just have to say:
“Tales of ROMANCE, taken from REAL LIFE!”
Ah, the deep-seated optimism of the comic-book cover past! Gives one that nostalgia in the sung words of Suzanne Vega:
“look at all the waifs of Dickensian England
why is it their suffering is more picturesque?
must be cause their rags are so very Victorian
the ones here at home just don’t give it their best”
But of course:
“but trouble is still trouble and evil still evil
sometimes we wonder; is there more now, or less?
if we had a tool or could tally the handfuls
measure for measure it’s the same would be my guess”
That brightens my day believe it or not. I could actually use a maid myself.
But I can keep track of my Laundry, It’s keeping my ROOM clean I REALLY need the help with.
But if I got help I’d litterally have to earn the money myself. My mom wouldn’t “come visit my dorm” see it messy get frustrated and call for maid services.
She just wouldn’t come over and would essentially refuse to visit until it was clean.
Oh and if I wanted help i’d have to earn the money to hire myself.
No sympathy, no mercy, pretty scorched earn. Dude’s are privileged.
It’s pathetic.
What’s even worse is that so few of them seem to even be self concious about it, like I know I wouldn’t want mon a’mour to have to clean in here, I wouldn’t want her to SEE it to clean in the first place.
embarassing!!!
These guys have been essentially socialized to believe they could -expect- or -find- somebody else that would take care of it too.
I have no such expectations. I realize that If I want somebody else to clean for me I’m going to have to pay them to do it.
Plus I’m a philogynist so I LOVE women and am EXTREMELY greatful for the cleaniness they provide
Those guys though it’s like they’re not even greatful. Women won’t sleep with them on top of cleaning for them.
On top of everything else women do for them already.
Oh Plus if I wanted to actually be able to hire a maid I’d probably have to be on my own in another unit because my father would get very upset at the idea of my spending money that way here so like effectively the only way I can be empowered to spend my own money the way I see fit is not to be under his grasp because he’s going to Insert his input no matter what.