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Horses, Carrots, Hospital Visits and 15 Other Often Overlooked Red Pill Red Flags

Face it, dudes! There's no way you can compete with this.
Face it, dudes! There’s no way you can compete with this.

It’s tough to be a Red Piller, apparently. I mean, once a man has mastered the fine art of Red Pillery, he quickly becomes so irresistable to the HB7’s through HB9’s of the world that he needs advice on which of these lovely ladies deserve to be treated to Long Term Relationships (LTR’s) and which deserve only to be plated.

Happily, the good fellows on the Ask The Red Pill subreddit have made this tedious sorting procedure much easier and more scientific, providing numerous examples of “red flags” that men should watch out for in the ladies they’re dating.

Some of their advice is fairly standard relationship advice: avoid manipulative or abusive women, as manipulation and abuse are only ok when Red Pill dudes do them. Other “red flags” are standard Red Pill bugbears like tattoos (never ok for women); dyed hair (it’s only ok to dye hair if you’re, say, a well-known Red Piller with scary grey hairs sprouting in your beard); antidepressants (getting treatment for depression is apparently a terrible thing); and of course getting fat.

But. as a public service, I thought I would share some of the more, well, unique “red flags” that should instantly disqualify women as LTR material. If nothing else, this should be a useful list for any woman who would like to know some simple things they can do to repel Red Pill dudes.

So here, in the words of assorted Red Pillers, are the Top 18 Often Overlooked Red Pill Red Flags for men seeking long-term relationships. If any of the following are true, your potential special lady is actually a filthy whore only good for sex.

1) She uses birth control

2) She has a “squeaky 5 year old voice”

3) She went to law school

4) She has “many bins of chopped carrots in fridge”

5) She doesn’t wear dresses “without being commanded to”

6) She owns a dog

7) She owns a horse

8) She’s named Tiffany

9) Her mom is fat

10) She’s two years older than you

11) She “wants to wear [a] slutty bikini to music festival”

12) She had sex with more dudes before you than she told you she did, which you discovered by going through old messages on her phone without her permission

13) She had sex with a number of football players during her freshman year in college, which you discovered by going through her old Facebook posts without her permission, and also the football players were black dudes

14) She has gay friends, because they’ll tell her “you go girl” if she has sex with a cute guy in a bathroom

15) She is a survivor of childhood sexual abuse

16) She’s “more social than you. Because sluts and whores crave attention above all, they tend to be heavily involved in social events, parties, get togethers and just overall more outgoing than you.”

17) She previously worked at a flight attendant

18) She “frequently [goes] to the hospital and has family with a history of health issues”

So there you are!

There is, of course. a much shorter Red Pill Red Flag list for women considering a long-term relationship with a guy. There is only one item on this list.

  1. He gets dating advice from the Red Pill subreddit (or any other Red Pill site)

In a future post I will look in more detail at several of these Red Pill Red Flags.

Sources: The first six in the list come from Red Piller abdada, a frequent maker of red flag lists, in comments here here, and here, The rest are linked directly to their sources on the Ask The Red Pill subreddit.

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littleknown
littleknown
8 years ago

You know what’s funny? After I discovered MRAs/PUAs/RPers/MGTOWs, tattoos and dyed hair became more attractive to me, as signifiers of someone more likely to care about the things I care about, especially bodily autonomy.

And the dog thing — getting “ALL” her attention? Dudes, if you don’t like dogs, just put that in your profile, and don’t date women who like dogs. If you do like dogs, maybe you can enjoy the dog(s) *together*? Or does playing with and bonding over dogs just mean that you’ll have less sexytime?

Bina
Bina
8 years ago

OH! It just occurred to me: Maybe she keeps bins of carrots around for her bunny? Or her HORSE? Horses love carrots…

(Or maybe he’s afraid she’ll slice and dice him like she does her veggies. One never knows.)

Dreadnought
Dreadnought
8 years ago

@Bina

I don’t thik it’s rabbits. Bunnies get horrible gastric problems if you feed them too much carrots.

Name
Name
8 years ago

I can see the Horse one.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
8 years ago

Horse do indeed enjoy carrots. To the extent that it’s a really bad idea to play carrot ‘tug of war’ with them.

http://s1122.photobucket.com/user/Alan_Robertshaw/media/1507880_10152609183680936_4913613495300124596_n_zpszbggvcqx.jpg

Lolallama
Lolallama
8 years ago

@bina- omg the weenie thing is the only possible explanation!!!

Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
8 years ago

I thought the carrot thing might be some sort of subliminal Lorena Bobbitt alert.

@Orion

If you are terrified that your partner might gain weight, checking her parents’ weight would actually help predict how likely that is.

Well, except that RedPillers assume all women take after their mothers, and all men take after their fathers. Some women inherit their father’s build and metabolism. Or their aunt’s. Or their grandmother’s. If mom is overweight and dad is skinny, it’s not necessarily written in stone that their daughter will be overweight at that age.

more social than you. Because sluts and whores crave attention above all, they tend to be heavily involved in social events, parties, get togethers and just overall more outgoing than you.

In Normal World, being popular and having friends is a good thing in a partner. In RedPill World, it’s a disaster, because other men will want to talk to, flirt with, and perhaps even steal your partner. Her SMV will be higher than yours, she’ll discover there are other (better) options, and you won’t be able to win the epic battle for supremacy relationship. You are supposed to be the prize. You! Not her! You! You!

has family with a history of health issues

Who doesn’t? Does anyone have four grandparents who all died peacefully in their sleep of old age?

I thought it was supposed to be women who were super picky and then woke up at age 35 regretting having rejected all the NiceGuys for superficial reasons. Isn’t this the same thing? This list is basically a lengthy bunch of post hoc excuses for why they’re not getting laid. It’s not that they’re pathetic, abusive, arrogant jerks who need to consult internet strangers about the best way to fuck up the most basic social interactions, and the ladies are rejecting them with a resounding “hell no, I ain’t hitching my wagon to that”. Oh no: it’s that the ladies just don’t measure up to their lofty standards and are all automatically disqualified.

It’s why I don’t own a villa in the south of France. Because all the villas are just decrepit attention whores.*

*Even their walls are post-wall.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
8 years ago
msexceptiontotherule
8 years ago

On the exceedingly unlikely chance I’m single at some future point but not yet dead, I think I shall need to go adopt a whole fluffy herd of dogs and cats. For protection. The s/o may have to sleep on the floor (he’ll get used to it!) but I don’t want to wait until the possible single-dom happens and then have to run out and obtain my animal army last minute! That would be irresponsible. 😉

We also need to work on making the “toss a tampon into the RP crowd because it’s like a super absorbent grenade” thing a regular practice. Maybe after picking up a few pounds of carrots, buying slutty bikinis (for those who go swimming or whatever), getting the birth control prescription refilled, buying a horse or a miniature horse (they come in two sizes for a reason people: big house and not so big house!), dyeing hair, and scheduling nightly parties clear through the next two months on the calendar (who knows where that flight attendant job will take you when a whole two months have passed!)…

Good thing I already went to law school, otherwise I’d be super extra incredibly busy. 😉

Newt
Newt
8 years ago

Possible reasons for the “no carrots” thing:

Carrots = vegetables. She might be one of those vegetarians you’ve heard about. She might even try to make *you* vegetarian.

She might be dieting. (This is like the complaints about makeup – they want women to be *effortlessly* thin and hot.)

If she’s in the habit of chopping carrots, she might get confused and chop your boner when you leave it lying around.

She chops up more carrots than are needed at the time. This is inefficient and irrational. Maybe she’s a hoarder.

The more bins of carrots in the fridge, the less space for your flavourless, chilled, fizzy beer.

Makroth
Makroth
8 years ago

In unrelated news, now that Anita will be working with Twitter to ensure safety, the harassers have set up three new sites where they can be all by themselves to talk about how to harass people.

https://kwitter.club/main/all

http://www.quitter.com/

https://sealion.club/main/all

Nathan Hevenstone
8 years ago

Okay… I’m glad to see I wasn’t the only one who thought “Lorena Bobbit” when I read the thing about chopped carrots. I know how obsessed these d00ds are with their penises, so I really thought that was supposed to be a metaphor for “she might chop your carrot… off!”

David explained it, though… d00d thinks it’s a signifier for Bulimia?

What?

Also, I love tattoos and dyed hair… especially multi-colored dyed hair or otherwise hair dyed in colors that a person wouldn’t be born with (like blue, or hot pink, or purple, or green, etc). Completely awesome.

Terrabeau
Terrabeau
8 years ago

@Makroth

Just went to visit the Sealion Club. The first messages on the main page were “I’ll fuck your kids” and some CG porn. I don’t know what I expected.

arash
arash
8 years ago

i’m wondering maybe making an ass out of yourself is part of the so called “game”.

anon
anon
8 years ago

3) She went to law school

If they know how consent works and what domestic abuse is then the Roosh playbook becomes useless

ms_xeno
ms_xeno
8 years ago

Chopped carrots: no.
Grated carrots: Fuck YEAH!

http://www.onceuponachef.com/2009/07/french-grated-carrot-salad.html

Luckily, I’m fat. So despite my gray hair and dearth of tattoos, I’ve no fear of attracting any of these buttwipes any time soon.

Arctic Ape
Arctic Ape
8 years ago

“SHE SHOULD PROVIDE ME WITH SNACKS WHEN I’M OVER AT HER PLACE GLARING AT HER DOG!”

“The only non-vegan food I have is kibble. You want some?”

Orion
8 years ago

This list is basically a lengthy bunch of post hoc excuses for why they’re not getting laid.

Oh, it’s far worse than that. Many of these threads come from a guy posting, “I’m in a good relationship with a seemingly great woman, but I’m a little insecure about X, or X annoys me a little. What should I do?”

Then some posters say “absolutely break up with her because X,” while others say “forget X, you should break up with her because Y.” Several flags on David’s list are the idiosyncratic obsessions of one dude who shows up to hate on everyone’s parade.

————————————————————————————————————-
Each of these questions seems to get 5 standard crowd reactions.

–Stay with her because X is not actually a problem
–Stay with her because all women are like that
–Break up with her because X
–Break up with her because Y
–Break up with her because you shouldn’t date women

Tessa
8 years ago

Terrabeau:

@Makroth

Just went to visit the Sealion Club. The first messages on the main page were “I’ll fuck your kids” and some CG porn. I don’t know what I expected.

That’s pretty much exactly what I expected.

dlouwe
dlouwe
8 years ago

I think a lot of these dudes don’t really know what a red flag is. They seem to think that “a thing that happened once in a bad relationship” counts.

My only hope is that their set of “red flags” becomes so restrictive that they self-select themselves out of the dating pool and stop subjecting their horrid selves on unsuspecting women.

You know what’s funny? After I discovered MRAs/PUAs/RPers/MGTOWs, tattoos and dyed hair became more attractive to me, as signifiers of someone more likely to care about the things I care about, especially bodily autonomy.

I’ve always had a big thing for tattoos, dyed hair, and piercings (I have issues with facial memory, so those visual distinctions help me remember people, which is in turn interpreted as “attractiveness”), but I always get a small bit of pleasure knowing that my “type” is pretty much diametrically opposed to what shitty online misogynists want.

My current most significant partner is confident, outspoken, a (self-labeled) “fat slut”, and has a short blue and purple mohawk. We live together across the street from her boyfriend, who often comes out with us for really cute 3-way dates. And I have literally never been happier with my life.

WeirwoodTreeHugger
WeirwoodTreeHugger
8 years ago

TW and TMI for bulimia

The carrot stick = bulimia thing is partially rational. A lot of bulimics use something orange as a marker food. You start out with that at the beginning of a binge so you know where the point is in your purge that you’ve expelled all the food from that binge. Orange is easy to see.

Although when I was purging I’d just stop when I saw blood :/

That said, there are a lot better clues to bulimia than carrots in the fridge. Carrots are a common snake food. I eat them with red pepper hummus a lot and I don’t even binge and purge anymore.

Lea
Lea
8 years ago

They’re just terrified to learn women are people.

How does a person live in fear and resentment of other people’s humanity?

*hugs dogs*

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
8 years ago

Hugs, WWTH.

katz
8 years ago

Having whole bins of chopped carrots is a sign of poor judgment. She’ll never be able to eat them all before they dry out.

dlouwe
dlouwe
8 years ago

@WWTH

Carrots are a common snake food. I eat them with red pepper hummus a lot

Proof that Feminists are literally reptilians???

But seriously, carrots are awful snake food.