As every dedicated Red Piller knows, women are always taking our stuff. Our money, our children, our hobbies, our jerbs jobs, you name it. And now, according to one Red Pill Redditor, they’ve come to take our balls!
Well, the word “balls” anyway.
In a post today on the Red Pill subreddit, a fellow calling himself Rasalom72 complains that he keeps “[s]eeing the term “Ladyballs” popping up around.” Even though LADIES DON’T HAVE BALLS. (Well, if you ignore all those trans women who don’t get genital surgery, but, hey, you can’t expect Red Pillers to think much beyond their own dicks.)
Anyway. ladies are going around saying “ladyballs,” and this causes Rasalom72 to go BALListic. (Did you see what I did there?)
Let’s let Rasalom72 explain this new form of anti-male oppression:
So I keep seeing this term and every time I see it, I shake my head and think about how very much this applies to us. It’s normal for a guy to say “he’s got balls”, when he does something that is risky, or dangerous…. but women have no such expression…. so why not just do what they always do… steal one from the guys and make it work. (and it doesn’t… it always sounds fucking stupid).
Basically. having to listen to women talking about their ladyballs is like a kick in the manballs.
Lesson here: Don’t expect to have anything (even your anatomy), that women won’t try to co-op for there own ends. Women don’t have powerful gendered phrases because WOMEN ARE NOT A POWERFUL GENDER.
And nothing screams MEN ARE THE MOST POWERFUL GENDER than some dude on the internet whining about women saying “ladyballs.”
Better not tell him about “lady boners,” huh?
@sevenofnine: oh hey, which server are you on?
@the topic: I wasn’t convinced of the MRAs before, but now I am absolutely sure that they fight for my male rights. I mean, can you imagine living in a world where ladyballs are a thing? That’s almost like Hitler.
However, yeah, balls are weak and vulnerable, but then again, it’s a metaphor. Nobody looks a gift horse in the mouth, and while high water may not stop somebody, hell probably will. I wouldn’t take it too literally.
Yet, starting in the ’90s or so, we started seeing people put “guy,” “bro,” and “man” in front of words to make them seem more manly. Usually the word was a reference to an idea or object considered feminine. Isn’t that co-opting the language to make your gender seem more powerful?
Thanks to the growing view that masculinity is fragile and needs to be protected, we now have the following words in the English language meant to help men feel better about their gender:
-Bromace
-Guyliner
-Manscaping
-Mankini
-Man bun
-Man bag
-Man purse
-Meggings
-Menglish
-Mancation
-Man cave
-Man boobs (had to have that one)
-Any other word or phrase where some dumbshit has added “man” (or other masculine equivalent) to because he thinks it somehow protects his masculinity.
@Saphira
Excellent point!
Because if a guy carried a bag (not a “man bag”) and had a close male friend (not a “bromance”), his balls might fall off. Then he’d turn into a woman and have to relinquish the man-crown that crowned him King of All He Surveyed. And that would be haaaaaaard.
Can’t have that.
@Saphira:
Insecure people are really easy to market to. It’s the only reason anyone would drive a Humvee, after all.
[RANT]
I have an enormous aversion to the concept of a “bromance.” Are people so suffused with the spirit of No Homo that they’re unable to imagine two human beings having a close friendship without seeing it as romantic? Is our society so desperately alienated as to somehow see “two guys that get on well” as an exceptional thing rather than as the human norm? It’s a frickin’ indictment is what it is.
[/RANT]
@ Lordcrowstaff
I main EU and that’s where my collection is most complete but I play on all 3. Seven#11252
@ Saphira
I’ve seen the word “mipples” because apparently even having the standard compliment of body parts is feminine now.
@ EJ
There are some poor misguided people who think Humvees are an acceptable 4×4. The only real cure for such people is to point out that 75th Rangers are replacing their Humvee fleet with Land Rovers.
I’ve heard of “cosmenics” (cosmetics) because of the growing market for men in makeup/cosmetics/skincare.
Gotta protect that manliness, indeed.
That’s not a very good example, because it comes from a literal practice. You look at a horse’s teeth to get an idea of how old it is. It’s a good idea to do this before you buy one that doesn’t have papers, so you can gauge if the person selling the horse is lying to you about how old it is.
Looking at the teeth of a gift horse means you are not appreciating that this animal was given to you for free, and you’re preparing to critique it as if you were buying it for money.
“Also her balls are huge?”
@ POM
According to various horsey experts, it’s a bit of a myth that you can tell a horse’s age with any reliability from their teeth. It’s the equine equivalent of tyre kicking.
That is however, as you rightly point out, the origin of the saying.
(The weirdest thing about horse ID is that the pictures in their passports are drawings. Are horses camera shy or something?)
@POM: I know that it (supposedly, as we just learned) comes from the practice of actually looking a horse in the mouth. However, just like balls are a symbol for power, bravery and whatever (and the inherent sexism of this idea has been discussed here) so is the horse a symbol for a gift that you received.
@ Robert
Yes, the famous Brass Monkey hanging outside the pawn shops (there’s one two minutes from my door).
One of the possible origins of “cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey”.
(Rather more plausible than the navy expression IMO).
@ topic
I am no lady – just a woman – but I have LOADS of balls. Most of them are fuzzy and squishy.
I’ve got about 7 juggling balls and a heap of balls of wool.
(How’s that for a slogan: yarn bombers have a lot of balls).
@Alan:
While I am not an expert, I’d question your suggestion that a piece of equipment being bought by the US military is a mark of quality. These are, after all, the people who designed and bought the F-35.
A better argument against the use of the Humvee might be that it was ever, at any point, involved in the US Defence Procurement process.
@ EJ
It’s the fact that the US Army had to keep borrowing our Land Rovers (designed in 1948) when the Humvee couldn’t cope that illustrates your point. Landies are the best vehicle in the world though; I love them.
Do you ever read Duffel Blog? That has some great F-35 stories. Of course, the fact that the (nearly 50 year old) Harrier Jump Jet out performed the F-35 is yet another example of the same phenomena.
Hello.
Well, at least, i have learnt a word today. Till now, i was thinking that “ladyballs” refers to this adult toy with thin rope and balls that goes in this far planet of our solar system. It is never to late to learn, yeay !
Have a nice day.
Right?
It reminds me of the time some guy delusional oddball named Adam Yoshida wrote, without irony, “the weak will never pass up an opportunity to oppress the strong”.
I almost felt bad for the guy. It’s got to be work to be that self-deluded.
“It’s not fair that all these weaklings keep kicking my ass!!!”
@EJ re “bromance”:
It’s less “two human beings” and more “two men”. You see, feelings are for the weak. NO TIME FOR FEELINGS if you are a REEL MAN, says our society. The only feelings you have must come from your penis (because trans men might as well be invisible) unless you are a dad in which case it’s okay to be all Papa Wolf about your babies. But you can’t actually connect with another man who’s not related to you on any deep platonic level. What are you, some sort of WOMAN? So we tack a b onto the beginning of “romance” to signify a deep friendship that is totally not sexual or gay, bro, it’s totally manly and shit.
“Sisu” really is the best word in the world. It has so many connotations in Finnish, not just braver and guts, but also a relentless stick-to-it-ness. Basically, “sisu” gives the impression that while a person is tough and brave, they’re also pretty much too stupid to know when to quit. 😀
“Sisu” and “sauna” are the two words in Finnish that have very few equivalents in other languages. Which probably says a lot about us Finns. ô.Ô
Preach. It’s like they’ve never heard of FRIENDSHIP, or the arcane concept of BEST FRIENDS. Which is all gender-neutral. (And I would know, being a straight woman with a gay guy bestie.)
This stupid notion that you have to macho everything up to make it acceptable for men is demeaning, and doesn’t speak much for some guys’ security in their gender if they buy it for that reason. The other day at the pharmacy, I was gobsmacked to see that they were marketing dandruff shampoos that were specifically labelled “for men”. Um, do men get different kinds of flaky itchy scalp, or dry frizzy unmanageable hair, than women do? Are they really so insecure that they can’t be seen buying shampoo for specific hair and scalp types unless it’s also marketed to their manhood?
And then there’s the ridiculosity of lip balm with “tactical grip”…for men. Because man-lips apparently need macho chapstick, or they will shrivel up and he’ll sing soprano for the rest of his life!
Fun fact: If you go to the Googlez, you can start typing “needlessly gen…” and it will autocomplete to “needlessly gendered products”. And Buzzfeed has not one, but TWO separate entries dedicated to such crap. The struggle is real, alas.
http://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/1442110821-20150611.png
“Hecies” and “shecies”? I am officially dead of unholy feminine laughter.
PS: To all dudebros reading this, it’s okay if women laugh as long as they don’t point.
If we have no power, why is he so afraid of our ladyballs?
@Alan, scildfreja:
I’ve actually seen that sort of auto-linking done, several years ago, where a page would hyperlink certain words with two underlines and have a pop-up when you brought the mouse over it.
Unfortunately, the technology was most commonly used for auto-linking brand names to advertisements.
But women DO have balls! They are just internal. Ever heard of ovaries, Redpillock? So ladyballs isn’t really that inaccurate.
Chaltap-he kinda did, didn’t he? He really put his foot in it this time! The whole premise of the red pill philosophy (that women rule everything) undone by six little words-“women are not the powerful gender”. I wonder if they are going to have the same effect as the six little words in Doctor Who “don’t you think she looks tired?”. We can only hope.