The “cuckolding” obsession that has engulfed the nazi-lite alt right now seems to be spreading into Men’s Rights territory as well. In a recent post on the Men’s Rights subreddit that won dozens of upvotes, one anonymous cuck theorist explained his theory that “[w]e live in a cuckolding culture much more than a rape culture.”
How so, you ask?
After a rape: Most everyone are up in arms about it. All men are terrible and need to stop doing this heinous act.
After cheating/cuckolding: That was just being mean at best and you need to let it go; no shaming or calling it out, that’s misogyny against women basically just having sex.
I’ll have “Things No One Has Ever Said About Cheating or Cuckolding” for $500, Alex.
And when was the last time you heard anyone talking seriously about cuckolding outside of the manosphere (or perhaps on fetish porn sites, if you’re into that sort of thing)?
Any acknowledgement that it’s bad is sure to be explained with that male culture has set it up so that women are trapped in unnatural situations and forced to live out their natural and healthy desires in this way.
Yeah, this isn’t happening anywhere outside of your own fevered imagination, dude.
Quite often you’ll see cheating/cuckolding being touted as empowerment or liberation by feminists.
Wait, what? There was that one article in New York magazine in which a man wrote about how being in an open relationship — one that was open for both partners, incidentally — made him a better feminist. Polyamory is not the same as “cheating,” and outside of internet nazi circles no one defines a consensual open relationship as “cuckolding.”
Where is this for rape?
You’re seriously asking why no one is celebrating rape as “as empowerment or liberation?”
Thankfully it’s still an extreme, but it has often garnered support among feminists: Men who discover they have been successfully conned by a woman into raising a child as their own are castigated for leaving the situation in resentment.
I’m pretty sure most people would understand if the man in question were furious at the woman who deceived him in this way. But deserting a child you’ve raised as your own? That’s hideously cruel to the child, who is not to blame for the mother’s deception..
There’s this underlying understanding among feminists that women should be the sole arbiter of when a man is a father, irrespective of biology.
Wait, are you honestly suggesting that men should control whether or not women get pregnant?
Marital rape used to not be considered rape. Now it’s rape. Yet another rape culture indicator removed.
What a terrible tragedy!
No matter how you look at it all things rape are on the way out, but that can’t be said for cuckolding and cheating culture which, by all accounts, seem to be on the rise.
Only in your own mind, dude.
In the comments, a fellow calling himself thegrimraeper does the OP one better, complaining that
I don’t know what marital rape is and I probably will never know; they keep broadening the definition. as of the latest, it’s when you “beg for sex.” which leads me to believe that probably every couple that’s been together for an extended period of time has at least one party guilty of marital rape, if not both.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure none of that is true.
H/T — r/againstmensrights
@eyesopen
Oh come on, how bad could it possibly be?
[googles]
Excuse me while I go pour all the bleach into my brain
Ugh. Reading the synopsis on IMDB, I’m remembering more about Wishcraft. The main character, Brett is a classic Nice Guy. A high school nerd who is in love with the pretty cheerleader Samantha, who of course is dating an asshole jock. Oh, and the magic artifact that grants three wishes is a bull penis. So much unintended symbolism there.
Because Samantha falls in love with Brett, even after the spell is reversed, the moral of the story is, it’s okay to rape a girl if you’re a nice guy who gets picked on by jocks. Ick. Ick. Ick. I guess the people who made this movie were big Revenge of the Nerds fans, huh? Because rape isn’t rape rape if the rapist is an underdog.
These guys rarely get their heads out of the comfort of their own backside, do they?
Ah, yes, I’ve run into this too, and it’s pretty clearly part of the mindset. But their belief that the majority of women are using a ‘beta’ to pay for their kid is, I think, heavily tied to the daytime TV shows that skew the numbers.
The commentors are in a world unto themselves.
I assume evolutionary murder is even worse than wallet rape. Are analogies this tortured allowed under the Geneva Convention?
@ Arthur
“… tends to involve reasons as to why a person cheats (ie: you were a shitty person to date/marry).”
Those kinds of “reasons” are more commonly known as excuses.
To be fair, some earlier feminist media does show women cheating as a form of empowerment a la Thelma and Louise or The Awakening (though even that is an extreme simplification). But a lot of that was a backlash against a culture in which historically, male infidelity was much, much, *much* more condoned than female infidelity. Since Gone With the Wind was brought up, Rhett regularly cheats on Scarlett with prostitutes, but she’s portrayed as a whore for *hugging* another man. Not even kissing. Hugging. And correct me if I’m mistaken but novels about men’s adultery like Dr. Zhivago get treated as romances, while stuff like Anna Karenina, Madame Bovary etc. are tragedies.
@kimstu Yeah, technically, women don’t cuckold. Men cuckold. (I’ve never heard the term used for if a woman cheats with another woman, as “cuckolding” is usually framed as an act of masculine dominance.) Obviously a woman’s cheating is required for a man to cuckold, but that makes the blaming of “cuckolding” on women all the more absurd.
The only other modern context I’ve heard the term “cuckold” used is as a fetish, but I’ve mentioned before that it appears exclusively male. I’ve never heard of women fantasizing about their husbands having sex with other women, but apparently it’s a not uncommon common fetish for men to ask their wives to sleep with other guys. Now, according to MRA logic, that would justify all female infidelity everywhere, just like how the fact that some women fantasize about rape or domination justifies all male abuse, but…
Gotta love those MRAs.*
They’re the only people on earth who think “cuck” is an actual word.
*and by love, I mean “puke all over”
What I always find funny is that in the porn version, the poor widdle white man is there watching while his wife fucks another guy. He gets to see it all happen.
So maybe don’t lead with your kinks, eh TRPers?
It’s almost like they’ve never heard of a DNA test.
From a bit of personal experience: When I was a baby, my biological father denied that I was his up, down and sideways (Long story short, he wanted a first born son to carry on his family name, and instead got me). So, my mom took him to court and the court asked for a DNA test. Turns out I was, in fact, his, and the court ordered him to pay child support.
So he lived off of his father’s money and never got a job so we never saw a dime from him.
And what about the men who choose to raise children that aren’t theirs?
Oh, wait, they were most likely “conned”, and “ROBBED” because they couldn’t pass on their genes.
Seriously? Do you really think the world needs more of you that badly?
OT, and warning for cat related tragedy
We’re losing another one of my wife’s cats today. 🙁 That’s three in a row lost to cancer, and another extended family cat lost to bladder problems about 2 years ago. My mother in law has now lost two brothers and three cats to cancer within the last few years. Fuck it all.
And this one was my favorite, too.
Dhag
My sympathies
Permission to possibly breach the comments policy by yelling “Fuck Cancer!!!!!”
It’s been a horrible year in relation to the cases we’ve been discussing and also personally.
dhag, I’m so sorry. Fuck cancer, seriously.
@dhag85
Internet hugs to you if you want them. Cancer can definitely go do something else and stop taking away great people and beloved pets. Any time it wants, please.
The OP:
The only references outside porn and the Man-o-sphere I’ve heard to cuckolding have been in old, old fiction. I must say that the act of “cuckolding” sounds a lot less aggravating when called being “one who carries the bar” (a quick and literal translation of “aisankannattaja”, the Finnish word for “cuckold”). I wonder if other languages have similarly funny translations for the word? Fellow Mammotheers, do feel free to chime in! ^_^
Dan, I understand your anger, but that sort of comment isn’t allowed here; I’ve deleted it.
Well, today is National Hug Day, if twitter is right, so please do take an extra share of internet hugs, dhag.
(Except for you, manospherians. Go away. No hugs for you.)
Aw, dhag. 🙁 That’s so unfair to lose three cats in a row like that. I’m so sorry. Help yourself to as many hugs as you need from the hug barrel…it’s bottomless (in the infinite sense, not in the not-wearing-pants sense).
“Evolutionary murder”. “Divorce rape”. “Wallet rape.” “Day bang.” These guys describe all their relations with women in terms of crime and violence. Then they wonder why it’s so hard for them to get laid.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go commit kitchen embezzlement.
dhag, my condolences and hugs. Cancer has been a particular asshole this last year in my social circle, too.
It’s been a while since I put my dog to sleep, but I still remember it was really awful.
Apart from all of the other comments, one of the bizarrenesses that really strikes me here is that apparently cheating is pretty much the sole province of heterosexual women who are doing it with…who?
IT WILL NEVER BE KNOWN.
I’m so sorry, dhag.
Adding hugs to the barrel, Dhag.
@dhag85
I’m so sorry about your kitty.
………………………….
Off topic: The manosphere was up in arms about a criminal harassment case against Gregory Alan Elliot of Toronto. He allegedly harassed two feminists on Twitter. A verdict is due tomorrow after being delayed in October.
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/toronto/twitter-harassment-trial-1.3414389
A freelance journalist of some renown published an article (written by another feminist) about National Post reporter and misogynist Christie Blatchford’s lies about the case.
http://canadalandshow.com/article/christie-blatchford-worst
In other Canadian news, the trial of Jian Ghomeshi for rape is due to begin on Feb. 1.
@Freemage
thanks for the examples. I like having lists like that too.
tbh I gotta dip out on this thread, this entire topic is too upsetting for me rn, & all my words turn to a ball of grief & rage… love&peace
Young Frankenstein does that, too, unfortunately.
So that plus Wishcraft is 5 movies.
http://i.imgur.com/SvpOnN7.gif
@dhag85
I lost a cat to cancer too. My condolences to you & your wife.