The “cuckolding” obsession that has engulfed the nazi-lite alt right now seems to be spreading into Men’s Rights territory as well. In a recent post on the Men’s Rights subreddit that won dozens of upvotes, one anonymous cuck theorist explained his theory that “[w]e live in a cuckolding culture much more than a rape culture.”
How so, you ask?
After a rape: Most everyone are up in arms about it. All men are terrible and need to stop doing this heinous act.
After cheating/cuckolding: That was just being mean at best and you need to let it go; no shaming or calling it out, that’s misogyny against women basically just having sex.
I’ll have “Things No One Has Ever Said About Cheating or Cuckolding” for $500, Alex.
And when was the last time you heard anyone talking seriously about cuckolding outside of the manosphere (or perhaps on fetish porn sites, if you’re into that sort of thing)?
Any acknowledgement that it’s bad is sure to be explained with that male culture has set it up so that women are trapped in unnatural situations and forced to live out their natural and healthy desires in this way.
Yeah, this isn’t happening anywhere outside of your own fevered imagination, dude.
Quite often you’ll see cheating/cuckolding being touted as empowerment or liberation by feminists.
Wait, what? There was that one article in New York magazine in which a man wrote about how being in an open relationship — one that was open for both partners, incidentally — made him a better feminist. Polyamory is not the same as “cheating,” and outside of internet nazi circles no one defines a consensual open relationship as “cuckolding.”
Where is this for rape?
You’re seriously asking why no one is celebrating rape as “as empowerment or liberation?”
Thankfully it’s still an extreme, but it has often garnered support among feminists: Men who discover they have been successfully conned by a woman into raising a child as their own are castigated for leaving the situation in resentment.
I’m pretty sure most people would understand if the man in question were furious at the woman who deceived him in this way. But deserting a child you’ve raised as your own? That’s hideously cruel to the child, who is not to blame for the mother’s deception..
There’s this underlying understanding among feminists that women should be the sole arbiter of when a man is a father, irrespective of biology.
Wait, are you honestly suggesting that men should control whether or not women get pregnant?
Marital rape used to not be considered rape. Now it’s rape. Yet another rape culture indicator removed.
What a terrible tragedy!
No matter how you look at it all things rape are on the way out, but that can’t be said for cuckolding and cheating culture which, by all accounts, seem to be on the rise.
Only in your own mind, dude.
In the comments, a fellow calling himself thegrimraeper does the OP one better, complaining that
I don’t know what marital rape is and I probably will never know; they keep broadening the definition. as of the latest, it’s when you “beg for sex.” which leads me to believe that probably every couple that’s been together for an extended period of time has at least one party guilty of marital rape, if not both.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure none of that is true.
H/T — r/againstmensrights
Yes, that’s why the Ashley Madison data dump was just full of women’s personal details… oh, wait…
The blithe hypocrisy on display is staggering: he claims that society at large is indifferent or unsympathetic towards men whose partners cheat — yet who is it but the Men’s Rights Movement for whom “cuck” is a deadly insult? If they truly cared about men in that situation, they would never use that word. It’s like the MRAs who shed crocodile tears about the victims of prison rape one minute and make jokes about it the next.
Fuck you, guy. Here, have all my fuck you, and I hope a city block sized bolide of fuck you streaks from the sky and annihilates you and all your toxic chums on reddit.
These boys need to keep their fantasies to themselves.
Do you think this is too wordy for a skywriter? Maybe we should take out a billboard.
What I find quite interesting in the manosphere’s version of reality is the twin obsessions with women having sex with men other than themselves, and for them to have sex with lots of women. Unless the man to woman ratio changes drastically, they can’t have their cake and eat it too.
Further, this whole schtick would seem a tad more genuine if the obsession were with infidelity in general than with women’s infidelity. Is men’s infidelity really that less frequent or devastating to the partner?
After a rape: Most never say a word about it. Because all women are liars and need to stop lying about it, say men.
FTFY.
>snort< File under Things That Never Happen.
Meanwhile, this sort of thing is exactly what gets said…when a man cheats on a woman.
Because boys will be boys, and he’s gotta have it, don’tcha know?
Actually, that’s what gets said when a man cheats on a woman, if it’s ever said at all.
CITATION NEEDED.
Are you seriously expecting anyone to make the case that rape is okay? Empowering for men? An alternative to living trapped in a sexless relationship?
Dude, seek help. You lack perspective in the worst way.
Again, CITATION NEEDED.
No, there is not. If there were, I’d have seen it by now.
Oh, you poor widdle fings. You don’t get to take what’s not freely given, not even if you shell out for a marriage licence! Because everyone knows that was supposed to be a Get Out of Jail Free card for raping your wife, amirite?
I fail to see how this “removes” an “indicator” for rape culture, though. Marital rape still happens. Making it illegal hasn’t made it STOP. About all it has done, is brought a whole slew of implausible excuses out of the woodwork. Mostly from men.
CITATIONS NEEDED. Don’t worry, I’ll wait.
Well, at least the part about not knowing what it is is true. The rest is all bovine feces.
And if ever a menzer made the case for comprehensive sex ed, this one just did. Albeit quite inadvertently.
Mara hit the nail on the head. They don’t feel the slightest bit bad about the victims of cheating.
Oh, sure, they feel bad for themselves if it happens to them. But, fundamentally, their arguing from a position of entitlement.
That’s a new one for me, a woman who happens to be poly. I’m used to running into the guys who think “poly girls are easy” thus proposition me, then call me a whore for not wanting NSA sex with them. Because I owe them, of course, after sleeping with those hundreds upon hundreds of men they know I’ve bedded.
And by “beg for sex,” do you actually mean “coerce your wife into sleeping with you because you can’t respect her boundaries?” Yeah, thought so.
In what universe are the victims of rape believed and supported by most everyone? Because I’d like to live there. Sometimes I think MRAs must live in a parallel universe and our universes share the same internet.
Hey, I think I found a new idea for a science fiction TV show!
Don’t worry. The manosphere has an explanation for that. You see, men are denied sex by the evil wimmenz. If a husband wants to cheat, he has to work really hard for it. Poor babies! Women on the hand, can get sex anywhere, anytime from any man they want. That’s why women don’t have to go on Ashley Madison when they want to cheat.
I can’t remember if David did a post on this, but I know I saw this theory all over the internet.
More basic rape excusing. “Women can harm men by having sex. I mean, it’s not literally impossible, so it’s probably happening. Therefore, men, by which I mean “I,” should be allowed to harm women by having sex, i.e., raping them.” Class act.
Also, I’m putting this one as another piece of evidence that people going on about cuckholding destroying… whatever it destroys, interact with women primarily through porn.
Wait, is he actually upset that people get angrier about rape than they do about cheating? WTF? It’s the same reason people get angrier about murder than about lying– they’re both shitty, but one of them is very obviously more terrible.
So what he’s saying is that women cheat and men rape? It seems to me that it’s not feminists who are the ones saying awful things about men.
@cat mara
“Yes, that’s why the Ashley Madison data dump was just full of women’s personal details… oh, wait…”
Outside of Ashley Madison infidelity rates are becoming increasingly similar between men and women. HOWEVER, as far as a “cheating culture” goes, the only culture that glorifies “being a player” and “spinning plates” is pretty much an exclusively male thing.
It must suck to be an asshole and be forced to live in a world where other people are manifestations of your own projected shittiness.
I’m not sure that’s what that says, really. It sounds like he’s saying the feminists decide who is fiscally responsible, e.g. the “father”, regardless of genetics.
But it’s always difficult to figure out what the heck these guys think they’re trying to say.
I honestly don’t think I’ve seen cuckolding referenced anywhere else outside of a 16th Century drama.
Somehow, I don’t think these guys have ever read The Malcontent, and yet that is the culture they represent. The corrupt Genoese court… I guess Macquerelle is their straw feminist… it all makes sense to me now.
Rape used to be prosecuted as if it were an offence by one man against another through damage to his property (ie his wife, daughter, female relative, female servant..).
Could this be where our lovely poster gets his “rape = cheating” moral equivalences?
Or from his anal sphincter, whichever is the closer.
@ Saphira – I used to get that all the time when I was footloose and fancy free: oh, you’re bisexual? Oh, brilliant, you’ll definitely want to shag me, not to mention my girlfriend who you haven’t even met. What do you mean, you don’t fancy me? Is that a requirement?
Sigh.
Edited to add @ AltoFronto – you ninja’d me with the history references. Yes, references to the dreaded horns has made a bit of a comeback in the English speaking world.
“Thegrimraeper”… Oh good, a paedophillic 4Chan “Joke.” What a shining example of humanity. *pukes*
Yes, it’s really weird to see this term I associate with Chaucer suddenly take on such currency in the underbelly of the Internet.
Wait. That’s a child rape joke?
I just thought it was regular rape joke!
http://media.thedailytouch.com/2015/05/tumblr_inline_n0k2a4nTEd1rjt9u9.gif
@WWTH
From “Loli [prepubescent girl] haet raep.” Feel free to join in with the puking.
All I can think of is Frank Reynolds bellowing about his “hoore” wife on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
This.
Jon Lovitz as the tittering Evelyn Quince mentioned “cuckold horns” in an SNL sketch featuring Mel Gibson as a “lusty woodsman.” http://www.nbc.com/sites/nbcunbc/files/files/images/2015/5/02/140207_2723604_Tales_of_Ribaldry_anvver_4.jpg
AltoFronto:
It is still a big insult to imply that a man is a cuckold in southern Europe. I guess it’s a “macho” culture thing. Years ago, I read a book called “Your Mother’s Tongue” which described how swearing and obscenity varied across Europe; according to the author, “call a German a cuckold and he’ll reach for a dictionary; call an Italian a cuckold and he’ll reach for a knife” 🙂
(According to myth, a cuckolded man would grow horns — there are a lot of jokes in Shakespeare’s plays about that. It’s also why making the “heavy metal horns” sign is a deadly insult in parts of Europe…)
(Edited to add: Ninja’d on the horns thing by AsAboveSoBelow!)
Cuckolding.
Censorship
What other words do these people not understand?
Cuckolding is such a stupid sounding word.
I never heard it before this whole idiotic wannabe-movement propagated it – probably because I’m not a native speaker, but it still kinda seems to me it’s nearly extinct in daily use, except in historical contexts.