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Dean Esmay, Matt Forney Trade Rape-related Accusations in Internet Douchebag Grudge Match

And in this corner, Matt Forney!
And in this corner, Matt Forney!

Two of the internet’s most terrible people are engaged in a bitter grudge match that, one can only hope, leads to the utter defeat and humiliation of both of them.

In one corner, we have the excitable Dean Esmay, the former A Voice for Men Number Two who has become a formidable Twitter activist, if by “formidable” you mean “a slanderous, slur-spewing, own-goaling nitwit who really, really needs to think about switching to decaffeinated coffee and possibly getting off the internet forever because he embarrasses himself with such regularity.”

Checking with my dictionary, I see that this is not actually what “formidable” means.

Anyhoo, you may recall from my last post on Esmay that he has been loudly denouncing what he calls the “rape hysteria” in Cologne in Tweets like this one:

https://twitter.com/deanesmay/status/685029810523996160

In an irony-meter-breaking twist, Esmay has drawn a great deal of flak for this stance not so much from feminists as from an assortment of alt-right racists who want the world to believe the worst about Muslim “rapefugees.”

If you poke around on Twitter you will find Esmay being denounced as a rape apologist by such unsavory characters as Matt Forney and Roosh Valizadeh, who are, as readers of this blog know, not only repugnant misogynistic PUAs and far-right racists but also rather enthusiastic rape apologists themselves.

In a blog post, Forney expanded on the accusations and asked “Why Did Dean Esmay Call the Cologne Rape Victims ‘Liars?'”

Esmay has responded to these not-really-that-far-off accusations by screaming bloody murder and making a bunch of accusations of his own. After accusing Forney and Roosh of vile slander for suggesting that he thought that each and every one of the reports of sexual assault in Cologne were false, he went on to accuse Forney and Roosh themselves of rape.

https://twitter.com/deanesmay/status/687417655272292353

Esmay seems far more concerned about the alleged “quote-mined lies” being spread about himself than he does about the possible victims of Forney’s and Roosh’s alleged rapes.

Esmay’s blog post on the subject is more solipsistic still:

Confessed rapist Matt Forney has recently lied in public and, using Futrellian quote-mining, made it look as if I said women in Cologne lied about being raped. He knows this isn’t true, as does his cult leader RooshV, the king of the PUA rapetards and creator of the bizarre “NeoMasculinity” secular religion. Yet despite knowing the truth, and having had ample opportunity to retract his story, he and his creepy rapetard cult members keep saying it.

I’m not quie sure why Esmay thinks he’s going to convince anyone he’s not a rape apologist by calling his accusers “rapetards” — a nasty and thankfully not too widely known little portmanteau slur that AVFMers and former AVFMers like Esmay have generally applied to feminists fighting rape.

You know, I can only think of one reason to continually make a false allegation like that: Guilty men like to virtue signal by white knighting. So it appears that Matt Forney and RooshV are trying to recover some respectability by attacking innocent men. Why else with their disgusting lies about what I said on Cologne?

Now, we’ve all seen the evidence in Roosh’s own writing that has suggested to many observers that he’s a rapist. But what evidence is there against Forney?

Esmay points to a blog post of Forney’s with the appalling title “Why Girls Rarely Mean No When They Say No.” The post, which an apparently embarrassed Forney removed from his site some months ago, is as rapey as the title suggests. In it, Forney argues that “No Means Yes/Maybe/Take Me, You Sexy Beast!” and explains that

When a girl says “no” to sex or a particular sexual act, she rarely if ever means it wholeheartedly. While girls have sexual boundaries, theirs are not nearly as strong or well-defined as yours. With the right mix of persuasion, persistence, and audaciousness, you can get a girl to do just about anything you want. I know, because I’ve done it.

He follows this little confession with a story about how he once sort-of, kind-of forced sex on a “fuckbuddy” of his even though she “was in no mood to fuck.” She explicitly told him no; he removed her clothes and had sex with her anyway. “After about ten minutes,” he writes, “she started yelping like she was having her fingernails ripped out with a pair of pliers.” He kept going, nonetheless.

The twist ending? She didn’t actually charge him with rape.

Did she yell at me? Run off to the phone to call 911? Complain about how I’d ignored her wishes and fucked her anyway even though she didn’t want me to?

No: she hugged me and told me that I was “the only man on Earth who didn’t make [her] want to throw up.”

Make of that what you will.

Forney, in a blog post defending himself against Esmay’s accusations, describes this post as

a blog post I wrote a while ago and deleted, both because it was poorly-written and in poor taste (even for me), a post that has nothing to do with rape. 

Esmay then brings up some other rape allegations that have been made against Forney by blogger Rachel Haywire. Haywire hasn’t accused Forney of raping her, instead claiming that Forney raped a female friend of his; according to one anonymous tipster Esmay quotes in his blog post, the boyfriend of the woman in question walked in on Forney raping her as she lay passed-out on the floor. According to the source, she didn’t remember any of it.

Forney’s defense against these accusations is similar to the one he used in his blog post — noting that the alleged victim isn’t the one making the accusations and that she’s still a friend of his. On Twitter, he’s posted photos of the two of them together, smiling. Make of that what you will.

Could the grudge match between Esmay and Forney get any uglier? I think it could, and probably will.

 

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weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

On one hand, many of them are white supremacists but on the other hand they instantly read the word “rape” as “false rape accusation” so it’s probably been difficult for them to figure out whether they hate women most or black men most.

I know. It’s a real Sophie’s choice between misogyny and racism, isn’t it? Poor fellas!

If the thread doesn’t mind, I’m going to gif a different Disney character

comment image

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

Testing. One of my posts keeps disappearing in the other thread.

Patty Cakes
Patty Cakes
8 years ago

I think the funniest part of this is “Futrellian quote mining.” Is that when you quote someone’s own words in context so they look as ridiculous as they actually are?

Moocow
Moocow
8 years ago

@Bina

Also the part about schtupping her for a full ten minutes…who does he think he’s kidding? Anyone can see that he’s a two-pump chump, tops.

Pfft, if even that. By his own admission, if his partner displays confidence, he is rendered impotent.

@David Futrelle

That’s probably my favorite part of all this infighting. MRAs get so caught up in their emoti– ‘scuse me — ‘perfectly rational thoughts’ that the mask starts to slip and they say things that they probably don’t want us to know.

Have you covered the article she’s referring to at all?

Shadow
Shadow
8 years ago

@Moocow

David covered it when she dropped that steaming load

Snow Leopard
Snow Leopard
8 years ago

It’s synonymous with which of these two could eat the most shit.

Both win.

Moocow
Moocow
8 years ago

@Shadow

Oh wow, her own views really are just as bad! And judging by her recent comment, I’m gonna say that WHTM article was linked to her on more than one occasion. This is hilarious.

@WWTH

I believe Katie has approved any and all Disney character gifs, especially the evil ones!

http://49.media.tumblr.com/622bf7a473d488cf6a4c7c464df7319f/tumblr_nea3u3PvjC1rwfctbo1_1280.gif

Nequam
Nequam
8 years ago

weirwood: Well, I see your test post okay.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
8 years ago

Let me open a book on this.

I’ll give 3:2 for Forney and 2:1 for Esmay, with “winning” being defined as having the rest of the manosphere eventually come around to support them.

I’ll also throw in a side bet for who the next misogynist is who gets sucked into this mess: 5:4 for Valizadeh, 5:3 for Elam, 3:1 for Yiannopoulos and 10:1 for Cernovich or Weidmann.

Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen! Payable in Haribo or any other major forms of sweets except for Opal Fruits, because they’re horrible.

sunnysombrera
sunnysombrera
8 years ago

My Disney villain reaction to all this:
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mazbpmsejo1qlt206o5_250.gif

dhag85
dhag85
8 years ago

@EJ

I would say no winner for the main bet, Roosh and Juicebro for the side bet.

Cat Mara
Cat Mara
8 years ago

I’m just imagining “Douchebag Deathmatch” in the style of the old “Celebrity Deathmatch” show on MTV…

Dr. NicolaLuna
Dr. NicolaLuna
8 years ago

If the thread doesn’t mind, I’m going to gif a different Disney character

Ursula is my favourite Disney character and has been since I was tiny.

Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen! Payable in Haribo or any other major forms of sweets except for Opal Fruits, because they’re horrible.

No way, opal fruits are the best! Haribo are rubbish in comparison.

snork maiden
8 years ago

OT, but is anyone following the drama unfolding on YouTube involving Nicole ‘Dear Fat People’ Arbour?

She been accused of emotionally and physically abusing her ex-boyfriend, a fellow YouTuber.

What’s kind of interesting about this is how the manosphere are reacting. I would have expected AVFM to be all over this, women on male DV is chum in the water for them, and yet, crickets. In fact over on red pill forums people have been more scathing about the man for daring to talk about being a victim.

She recently made another troll video, this time attacking feminists, I’m wondering if that’s why the manosphere seems to be going easy on her?

It reminds me of when Shia LaBeouf was raped by a woman and the manosphere largely ignored him.

Lea
Lea
8 years ago

So Karen thinks when men say they were attacked, it happened. Yet when women say the same it is hysteria made up to hurt men? Who could have predicted her mind would work that way?

These folks are such parodies of themselves.

msexceptiontotherule
msexceptiontotherule
8 years ago

The AVFM bunch are probably just really busy with finding stuff they can plagiarize for ‘articles’.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
8 years ago

Did any Brit mammotheers see the Newsnight feature about Koln and Denmark the other night?

It was pretty interesting, no MRAs or nazis involved fortunately.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

Snork Maiden,
I hadn’t heard of that. It doesn’t surprise me that she’s as horrible in her personal life as she is in her professional life. I’m using the word “professional” loosely here.

It also doesn’t surprise me that the manuresphere doesn’t care. She hates fat people and in their minds only women get fat. The exception being David of course. IIRC she made a racist video too. And of course she’s full of internalized misogyny. Of course they like her!

I also remember a week or two reading about
*massive trigger warning



A horrific rape in which a freshman basketball player was raped in a hazing by some older boys on the team during a tournament out of town. They sodomized him with a broomstick and it ruptured his intestine or something. The coach didn’t get the victim adequate medical treatment and allowed the rest of the team to continue playing. Nothing was done until the victim’s parents made a huge stink about it.

I don’t recall seeing any indication the manosphere gave a shit about this. Of course not. There’s no woman to blame. If the MRM actually cared about male victims, they should have been all over this.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
8 years ago

@ dr nicola

Where do you live? Just curious because in the UK they changed Opal Fruits to Starburst. Much controversy!

DS
DS
8 years ago

Oh yes please. Pass some of that popcorn my way! Haha. These guys…I can’t even deal with how absurd it all is. It’s like the Jerry Springer Show threw up a few deadbeats and they started breaking prop-chairs over each other’s heads; I’m horrified yet I cannot look away! 😀

*reaches over and grabs popcorn*
*om nom nom nom*

magnesium
8 years ago

@snork maiden
I just read an article about it on Rawstory http://www.rawstory.com/2016/01/nicole-arbours-disgusting-response-to-matthew-santoros-allegation-of-abuse/

I don’t know who this guy is and I’ve never actually watched Arbour’s infamous video, but it’s interesting that she basically named herself for the abuser and called him a “little bitch”. Not at all surprised MRA’s aren’t taking her to task on this. If she’s a woman who agrees with them publicly, she can go on a man-killing spree and they’d still be sending her patreon money.

snork maiden
8 years ago

@weirwoodtreehugger,

oh my goodness that is horrifying about the freshman. The trend I see within rape culture is while abuse of women is blamed upon the victim’s actions, abuse of men is simply laughed off or ignored. I hope he sees some justice.

Ælfscýne
Ælfscýne
8 years ago

@ weirwoodtreehugger

Were the basketball players mainly black boys? Because in that case, of course the majority of MRAs doesn’t care.

LindsayIrene
8 years ago

From a Guardian article:

“Of the 31 people identified, nine were Algerian, eight Moroccan, five Iranian, four Syrian and two German, plus an Iraqi, a Serb and a US citizen.”

More of the attackers may have been identified since the article came out.

nparker
nparker
8 years ago

@ DS

Oh yes please. Pass some of that popcorn my way! Haha. These guys…I can’t even deal with how absurd it all is. It’s like the Jerry Springer Show threw up a few deadbeats and they started breaking prop-chairs over each other’s heads

That’s very true, exactly what its like!
(Partly because Jerry Springer episodes are always like that, but in the UK’s Jeremy Kyle, there is at least quite a few rather sweet, happy, calm stories. There’s no chance a disagreement like that would happen in MRAland!)

@ Alan Robertshaw

I never knew Starburst has a different original name! My dad used to buy us Starburst every time we asked for sweets. It got a little boring after a while.

Off topic but related (does that make sense? I think so) did anyone see this ‘false accusation’ related article? Both article and comments are so hilariously pathetic:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/relationships/11904203/Well-done-feminism.-Now-man-are-afraid-to-help-women-at-work.html

So many male tears. I tried going swimming at one point, but it was just so salty!