A new post at Return of Kings, Roosh V’s site for terrible, terrible men, has me wondering: Do Red Pillers all harbor a secret wish to have sex with their dogs?
In the post, regular RoK contributor Max Roscoe reports on “10 Things My Dog Taught Me About Women.” His conclusion? That aside from that whole sex thing, he prefers his dog. Man’s faithful canine companions, he explains
are incredibly loyal, protective, and offer unconditional love, and will in some ways be more consistent, reliable, and rewarding than a woman. It’s often said that sexbots will be the end of the modern feminist. Dogs provide most of the positive benefits of women except sex, and owning one can benefit a man greatly.
Roscoe apparently dreams of a glorious future in which women can be replaced with a more pliable combo of sexbots and dogs.
Until the sexbots arrive, though, heterosexual men — or at least those heterosexual men who are unwilling to have sex with their dogs — are stuck with women.
But all is not lost, as Roscoe offers a number of useful suggestions on how men can make their girlfriends or wives more like dogs.
As Roscoe sees it, proper training is key for both women and dogs.
A well trained dog will know when it misbehaves, and will sense the disappointment or anger of its owner when it breaks the rules. Likewise, a woman should be trained to behave properly. Since Western civilization has abdicated its role in training members of both sexes how to behave politely and what proper roles are, men must take up this duty on our own.
Unfortunately, Roscoe notes, even well-trained dogs and women sometimes misbehave, making “slight corrections” necessary. All men need to do to get their women back in line is to become paranoid, controlling creeps.
Tell her to hit the gym when she’s gotten a bit out of shape, but don’t wait until she’s gained 20 pounds. Give her a limit on how much alcohol she can drink. Tell her she must inform you who she is going out with and where.
Women aren’t just like dogs; they’re also like children.
As we know, women are essentially large children, and like a teen who will gradually test the limits of his boundaries, a woman will push the rules to see how much she can get away with. Treat her like a father would his child, and let her know she is not to behave this way in the future. She will not only stop the harmful actions, but come to respect you even more.
So how can men tell if their wives or girlfriends are good dogs?
By their shiny coats. Dogs should have “well groomed hair” rather than “a matted, dirty, coat full of debris.” Same with women!
A “quality” woman, Roscoe proclaims, should
groom herself well, with long, feminine hair, trimmed and painted nails, and conservative clothing.
And she should have “clear, radiant skin,” rather than a “body mutilated with shrapnel and graffiti.”
She should also, Roscoe argues, know her place. Just as a dog is naturally “subservient to its owner,” so “a woman is naturally and normally the submissive partner to the man.”
This is the case, Roscoe explains, even if she has short hair.
No amount of short haircuts, business suits, you-go-girling or education can reverse the natural role than women play in the world.
But don’t bother to try to explain this to women. Hell, don’t bother to explain anything to them, because women, like dogs, don’t really understand human language. It’s all “blah blah blah Ginger” to them.
You can talk in a kind voice to a dog, and he will understand your loving happiness, and reciprocate, but beyond that, dogs are incapable of understanding you, interpreting your thoughts, empathizing, or using logic.
Likewise, it is a waste of time to get into deep discussions with women, expect them to rationalize or understand things, or even to truly empathize or love a man. … While a dog or woman can respect and honor you, and make you feel good, they cannot truly understand you, or love you the way you love them.
I’m thinking that Roscoe should not only be kept away from women, but from dogs as well.
Caligula Rex
1) You’re an awful human being. I mean that in the nicest possible way of course, but wow, you’re repugnant.
2) You’re also obviously racist.
3) I really love the word “cuckolding” so much. Its unironic use tells so much about the speaker.
4) (This applies to not only you, but all the guys who have the mindset of the guy in the original post)… Women are as much people as you (and I just mean in the objective being a person sense, not quality, because really, you’re bad bad baaaad). So no, behavior you don’t like isn’t an indication that she is like a child or needs to be changed. You do not have the right to treat other adult people like that. Just because you don’t like dyed hair, piercings, or tattoos doesn’t mean she did anything wrong to herself. Now if she held you down and tattooed or pierced you, she’d be pretty horrible, but the fact that you think what she does with her own body is something you should and have a right to change shows that you suck (again, I mean that as nicely as possible). I’m not even going to explain why… because it would require you having the ability realize women are equal to you, but being you, and said disgustingness as a human, it wouldn’t do much good.
5) Define punish? What gives you the right to punish a partner? Ha ha, I’m just kidding, I know the answer.
The question isn’t whether one can, it’s a question of what kind of person it makes you to consider it. And the fact you somehow wrote that sentence as “works for all female animals” as if it magically doesn’t work on male animals or *gasp* male humans, just makes you look very stupid. Ridiculously so. Hilariously so.
No offense.
Thanks for everyone putting Caligula Rex in his place. Funny how misognists and white supremists complain about women/girls doing nice things for themselves and being with black men and calling them “spoiled and entitled princesses” etc but they expect everyone to bow down before them, treat them like kings and let them do whatever they want which to them is not entitlement at all.
Kafkanomore
Please let’s not shame him if he has a neck beard then that’s fine and there are people who do live with their parents for different reasons one of them is that they’re disabled and need help.
He’s got half a point. I’d take any unruly bastard of a dog over the most well-heeled male supremacist in a heartbeat. Like the man says: you can train a dog.
*rolls up newspaper*
*whacks Caligula Rex over nose*
Bad! BAD CALIGULA REX! Stop being such an insufferable dipshit. BAAAAAAAD!
Caligula Rex,
The word is mammals, not mammalians. Although mammamlian is a noun, its usage by the majority of people who aren’t trying their very best to sound like the smartest person in the room is primarily adjectival.
@Caligula Rex
First: …Really? Caligula? Well, I’m surprised you didn’t talk about horses.
Second: Yes, of course you can condition women, because women are able to observe patterns and act accordingly. Being liable to conditioning is one of the downsides of it.
If men can’t be conditionated, they can’t recognize patterns. If they can’t recognize patterns, they can’t logic.
You get an F.
I actually do think that Caligula Rex was taking the piss.
Thank you Amy for pointing out that ‘natural women’ have body hair – we also do not have breasts that look like a large ball has been cut in half and stuck on our chest. And a ‘natural woman’ would NEVER wear nail varnish, OR make up!
Somehow I think that they have altered the meaning of natural – you know, like food and cosmetic manufacturers are always doing.
Drive-by troll:
Not knowing this ‘nym and whether its owner has been here before (do correct me if I’m wrong, locals), it’s difficult to take this seriously on any level. It appears for all the world to be nothing more than a regurgitated litany of misogynist arsehole talking points and strawmen, designed specifically to offend and draw incensed comments. It’s the kind of thing a fourteen year-old with bugger-all else to do would post and then sit back, basking in the storm of completely understandable outrage, praising themselves for their ability to push people’s buttons.
Of course, per Poe’s Law, it’s equally possible it’s genuine – the quoted article in the OP shows that a not-incidental number of people actually believe this self-serving wish-thinking tripe, seemingly designed to prop up fragile little boy-man egos, stuck dreaming of bygone eras they never even lived through in the first place.
Genuine or not, Troll, you are indeed a pathetic little indictment of modern misogynist “culture”.
Pretty sure Caligula is just saying what he thinks will get the most response. Cool story, bro.
@Ellesar
If he willingly calls himself “Caligula Rex” he’d better be.
I don’t bother trying to differentiate ‘real’ misogyny from ‘fake for-the-lulz’ misogyny. Either way, the poster ought to have their computer locked away in a closet until they’re able to act like civilized human beings.
If he’s the same Caligula Rex as the one that shows up on Google, he believes every word he typed. I won’t link to probably-his YouTube account here; several of probably-his liked videos are of men assaulting women and gay people in the street, and fuck no I’m not linking to that shit.
I imagine that if Caligula was being satirical (in the genuine sense, not the knee-jerk-excuse-for-sexism sense) they would have returned to defend themselves by now. Trolls can have a habit of dropping a steaming turd and running away so they don’t have to face repercussions. Looks like this is what Caligula has done.
Hey bro, if you’re lurking and reading after all, do you want to say anything for yourself? Anything?
There were a few too many times (back when I was new to all this stuff) when I thought, “There’s just no way an actual human being thinks like this…this is trolling or poorly done satire…”
And sometimes it may have been trolling, but way too many people earnestly agreed with it for it to be not taken seriously.
And satire…well, unfortunately for anyone who’d like to do any satire of MRAs/most of the “manosphere”, good satire needs to be just a hair more outlandish than the source material. That’s difficult to do when almost any misogynist shit you can think up is believed by someone out there.
It’s like Rule 34, but for misogynistic nonsense.
I’m getting tired of people calling misogynist, racist, etc garbage “satire” “trolling”, etc it’s not funny and they all need to be taken seriously. It makes me feel I’m and other people who are underprivileged are not important.
I’m having visions of Max Roscoe telling his dog to go make him a sammich and getting really confused as to why that doesn’t work. Turns out there’s another positive benefit of women that dogs can’t provide.
Note: this post contains sarcasm.
I ask my pets to do my chores for me all the time, actually.
I don’t get confused or angry when they don’t comply though.
Trolling might be attention seeking. People know that angering someone is one of the quickest ways to get attention, so they do that. On the other hand, crying “satire!” pisses me off because, no only is it an attempt to avoid consequences, even if it were satire, it would be really bad and show you have no business making satire.
Our “friend”seems to be of the hit-and-run variety of troll, so, if he’s not honest about his opinions, he’s at least thinking “hur hur I annoyed the feminazis”
Can we do more comparison of women and animals, though? I’m not sure if anyone would be down, but I think it could be funny:
“Women are like crows… they can bend metal wires into hooks with their beaks to use as tools, and they sit in tree branches staring at you ominously.”
I do get confused though, when misogynists get confused and angry when women don’t do their every bidding. I can’t understand why they seem to think we don’t have minds of their own, initially anyway. Then when they realise that we do they write long internet rants about us not being Stepford wives. Like, dude, who even gave you the idea that we would be in the first place???
@Rosa
“Women are like emperor penguins – bitches be leaving you all winter so they can go stuff themselves with fish! Nature sez they should be warming the eggs, not males. How do I know this isn’t the egg of some black cuck bird anyway??”
Hollywood.
@Sunnysombrera
“You should record every time you have sex with females, because they’re just like praying mantises, and otherwise, when she eats your head off, the gynocentric justice system will side with her!”
“Yeah I feel I’m watered down,
Whenever he’s around.
I put on the crown of clowns,
And melt slowly to the ground.
[snip]
They call him Hermit the Frog,
He’s looking for a dog.
Did you find your bitch in me?
Oh you’re abominable socially.
You’re just a little bit too much like me.”
–Hermit the Frog by Marina and the Diamonds
Women are like blue-ringed octopuses. They’re small and cute and colorful, but if you reach into the salt-water aquarium to try to pet them, they will inject you with venom that will cause total paralysis and death.