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The Protocols of the Elders of Feminism (Or, Gloria Steinem Didn’t Really Say That)

No, Gloria Steinem did not say this.
No, Gloria Steinem did not say this.

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I‘m continually amazed by the amount of time and energy that antifeminists put into fighting monsters of their own creation — that is, the imaginary feminists in their heads who bear about as much resemblance to real feminists as the rapacious, Machiavellian characters in The Protocols of The Elders of Zion do to real Jews.

I’ve made the Protocols of the Elders of Zion comparison more than a few times before, but I ran across an example of antifeminist monster-making earlier today that parallels the Protocols so exactly that it’s kind of unnerving.

The original Protocols, as many of you no doubt know, were an anti-Semitic forgery concocted in Russia by the Tsarist secret police around the turn of the twentieth century, purporting to offer proof of a plot by a cabal of Jews to take over the world. The document offered what it claimed was a transcript of a secret meeting of the aforementioned Elders that took place at some point late in the nineteenth century; in fact, most of the dialogue was plagiarized from works of fiction published many decades earlier.

Basically, the so-called Protocols are a collection of cartoonishly eeeeevil fake quotes from imaginary Jewish Elders. But millions of people, including Henry Ford and a certain Adolf Hitler, believed them to be real. Or at least acted as if they did.

Much of what Men’s Rightsers and other antifeminists believe about feminists is similarly bogus. I’ve written before about the collections of dubious “evil” quotes from feminists that regularly make the rounds on the antifeminist web (and that any number of antifeminists have cut-and-pasted into the comments here).

And I’ve written about the deliberate disinformation campaigns started by #GamerGaters and MRAs by spreading made-up quotes attributed to feminists like Jessica Valenti and Anita Sarkeesian.

So today I ran across yet another example, this time in the form of an “infographic” featuring an obviously fake quote purportedly from Gloria Steinem that was being passed around by a couple of A Voice for Men Twitter soldiers today.

I’ve pasted it above, though, as you may have noticed, I’ve taken the liberty of adding the words FAKE QUOTE in big red letters in case the picture gets into someone’s image search results sometime in the future.

So how do I know the quote is fake? Well, there’s the fact that it obviously is. But, to be sure, I used my highly sophisticated internet search skills to type part of the first sentence of the fake quote into a website called “Google.”

Looking through the results, I discovered that the “quote” originally appeared in a post with the ungrammatical title “Are Chimps smarter than Feminist?” on a little blog called The Waterpipe.

The Waterpipe is not a source that inspires much confidence. The blogger behind the site made only four posts in total, all of them attacks on feminism; the site’s “about” page contains the dummy text that WordPress expects bloggers to replace with their own bios.

The “Are Chimps smarter than Feminist?” post begins — shades of the original Protocols! —  by plagiarizing a hefty chunk of text about chimpanzee tool use from the website of the Jane Goodall Institute.

The “author” then goes on to suggest that chimps are in fact smarter than “feminist” because

The chimps have demonstrated an ability to conduct their parasitical relationship with termites in a sustainable manner as to not exhaust the termite nest and thus increase chances of survival, this survival instinct is not present in feminist. …

the feminist movement has made it its primary objective to eradicate masculinity. Ironically women in their 30s who are childless, unmarried and on a steady supply of anti-depressants are now questioning “Did we overdo it”

As evidence, of sorts, for this contention, the author presents us with the similarly ungrammatical lament of an obviously fictional character named “Clara Strongwoman,” who declares

I was willing to be a good wife, cook and clean while the man bought home the bacon, but you lousy feminist had to ruin it for all of us with your endless victim-hood, outrageous demands and out of control sense of entitlement.

While it’s pretty clear that the blogger here seriously believes the MGTOWish crap he’s peddling, it’s also pretty clear that he means “Clara Strongwoman” to be a joke.

He follows her obviously fake quote with an obviously fake dialogue amongst famous feminists, which he introduces as follows:

Top feminist from different organisations were secretly recorded by an anonymous user called Agent Orange on a debate with each other if they exhausted their parasitical relationship on men.

In other words, these famous feminists are purportedly discussing what to do now that they’ve driven men away with their endless demands.

Here’s a portion of the dialogue, purportedly between Steinem, radical feminist and anti-porn activist Gail Dines, and someone called “Bonnie Grabenhoffer” (two f’s) — who is presumably supposed to be NOW Action Vice President Bonnie Grabenhofer (one f).

As you’ll notice, the blogger doesn’t bother to try to make the discussion sound even vaguely convincing; it’s basically a very crude satire. The fake Steinem quote from the infographic is right in the middle of it all; I’ve put it in bold.

>Gail Dines: We pushed them too far and now there’s no going back, we had men right where we wanted, they worked long hours while we could play hide and seek in our pajamas with the kids, they went to die in wars, while we did easy house chores with our washing machines, dishwashers and vacuum cleaners.

>Gloria Steinem: I agree with Gail we even had chivalry, a fu**ing social etiquette that was heavily enforced which disposed men to heroic actions for the benefit of women, but now chivalry is being associated with beta behaviour.
Of course I agree with everyone in this room that emasculating and degrading men was the right thing to do, but we should have left a little bit of dignity in men so that they were still useful to us

>Bonnie Grabenhoffer: We could try shaming tactics but even the dumbest men still have an adequate survival instinct
We are trying very hard to rebuild society by removing male spaces but now we have things like Men Going Their Own Way and male rights groups popping up

>Gail Dines: Why? We cant even shame men into doing things anymore, they have little masculinity, how can a man even sink lower? I think what we need to also do is destroy the male survival instinct. Then they will start marrying women again.

Yes, that’s right: it’s a secret cabal of “top feminist” trying to figure out … how to get men to marry women again. Frankly. the Protocols of the Elders of Zion were more convincing.

Yet this ridiculous blog post got picked up by other antifeminist blogs and passed around by assorted antifeminists on Facebook. Now the fake quote is making the rounds on Twitter.

One atheist/Linux blogger reposted some of the dialogue above as if it were authentic, taking particular umbrage at the fake Steinem’s fake “stupidity.”

These so-called feminists put men down for doing just that to women for centuries. What’s their answer? If women are to be happy and productive, women need to do to men what women thought was horrible when men did it to them. I see no difference between Steinem and some chauvinist pig who thinks women should be in the kitchen cooking, barefoot and pregnant. …

I have a suggestion for the Steinems of this world: help free humanity from its primitive roots and stop spreading this bucolic bacchanalia about making slaves out of men.

Fake quote, real anger. See how that works?

People believe what they want to believe. When it comes to feminism, a lot of people are determined to believe the worst.

The more gullible anitifeminists believe the fake quotes are real; the more cynical antifeminists may be well aware the quotes are fake, but they’re happy to spread them anyway, knowing that their more gullible comrades will swallow the lies wholesale.

As the forgers of the Protocols of the Elders of Zion knew all too well, if your aim is to spread hate, lies are much more effective than truth.

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Shadow
Shadow
8 years ago

Tulse
Tulse
8 years ago

Merus:

One of my favourite blogs likes to refer to the Anti-Kitten Burning Coalition: people who are up in arms about the almost certainly imaginary faction of people who think that burning kittens is just fine.

If you’re referring to the most excellent Slacktivist, I will put in a hearty recommendation — Fred Clark is one of the most humane and thoughtful writers I know, and I say that even though he is a liberal evangelical and I am a hardened atheist. His blog is a treasure, and the commenting community is also very welcoming.

Regarding eponyms, I think the one I found the most surprising is “shrapnel”, which takes it name from a British artillery officer.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

Spoiler: Darth Vader is Kaiser Sose!

Tracy
Tracy
8 years ago

Machiavelli is my history crush, and I can’t help rushing to his defense. OMG, am I white-knighting Machiavelli? Can a fee-male even white knight?

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

No, Tracy. This is just evidence that Machiavelli is so alpha that he’s maintaining frame from beyond the grave.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
8 years ago

http://southfloridalawblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Machiavelli.jpg

Who, this guy? Maintaining frame? Never.

EDIT:

@Argenti:
Mt Everest should be, going by Sir George Everest’s pronounciation of his own name, Ee-vrest. Two syllables.

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
8 years ago

@ EJ

How else could it be pronounced? 🙂

(See also “Hawley’s” Comet)

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
8 years ago

@EJ:

He’s just thought up a really good neg. You can see it in his eyes.

Lady Mondegreen
Lady Mondegreen
8 years ago

@EJ (The Other One)

The moral arc of the cosmos may be long but it bends towards pwned

That’s…beautiful.

*sniffle*

Lady Mondegreen
Lady Mondegreen
8 years ago

@Chiomara

And Brazilian transphobic feminists use this same argument, that trans women bring us several steps back in gender equality because of their exaggerated femininity and their concept of gender

I think there are some legitimate concerns; it’s important to be able to discuss and disagree and critique gender without either side being reflexively dismissed. People who should be allies are fighting, and I’ve seen awful (and anti-intellectual) behavior on both sides.

To begin with I wish both sides would stop confusing “sex” with “gender.” Sex is about bodies (including brains–if you have dysphoria, your body-map is at odds with your assigned-at-birth sex.)

Gender is largely a social construction. People are free to enact it however they like, but it’s also OK to analyze and discuss its social implications.

Kat
Kat
8 years ago

@dhag85
Personal note: I just ate some chilis. One turned out to be about 100x more spicy than all the others. Panic ensued.

You poor thing. I feel your pain ’cause that happened to me once. I bought a tiny yellow pepper called — ha, ha — Scotch bonnet. Come on, the Scots don’t have significantly hot food, right? And for me, a bonnet conjures up a baby girl.

How wrong I was! Just washing and dicing it made my throat start to close up. Panic ensued! Luckily, it closed up only a little, and everything turned out okay. We never ate that #*@*! Scotch bonnet pepper.

Kat
Kat
8 years ago

@fridayjones

Darth Vader is Luke’s father. BLAM!

Wh-what?!

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
8 years ago

@Kat:
My ex-housemate’s boyfriend used to like his food spicy. Cartoonishly spicy, in fact. This went on for long enough and involved enough bravado and male posturing that we dared him to settle the matter by eating a scotch bonnet pepper.

He proceeded to, entirely sober, devour said scotch bonnet as though he was eating an apple; and then afterwards he reflected on it and said, “I deem this to be sufficiently hot.”

I get that he was trying to look hard in front of the rest of us; and I get that in gay couples of that nature the whole machoness thing is indeed a thing; but it has nonetheless stuck in my mind as almost the archetypically stupid thing to do.

Kat
Kat
8 years ago

@chiomara
I hope that you’re enjoying yourself in Germany with your boyfriend and his family. I understand that Germans are extremely fond of the rituals surrounding Christmas.

No one’s an angel. Your boyfriend dealt with refugees at some of their lowest moments. Stress brings out the worst in people.

As for feminism, I’m sure he’s said that there are no feminist issues in Germany and Angela Merkel proves it.

But look here. A German feminist magazine!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/EMMA_%28magazine%29

And here. A discussion of German feminism:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminism_in_Germany

It must be very exciting to leave your country for the first time and meet the guy you’ve been chatting with for a while now. I hope that all goes well for you.

Feliz Natal!

Kat
Kat
8 years ago

@EJ (The Other One)

This went on for long enough and involved enough bravado and male posturing that we dared him to settle the matter by eating a scotch bonnet pepper.

Whoa! Did this guy have other supernatural powers? I’m astonished.

Of course, that supernatural ability and about $5 will get him a tall latte with extra sprinkles.

Snowberry
Snowberry
8 years ago

I bought a tiny yellow pepper called — ha, ha — Scotch bonnet. Come on, the Scots don’t have significantly hot food, right?

Scotch bonnet isn’t from Scotland. It just looks vaguely like its namesake. It’s really from the Caribbean. Also, comparable to habaneros in spiciness. An understandable mistake, what with the name and the fact that peppers of European origin are mostly pretty mild.

dhag85
8 years ago

@Kat

I cook my Jamaican rice & peas with a scotch bonnet. But you’re supposed to remove it before serving. :p

The spiciest food I’ve ever had was the En Fuego burger at a place called Burger Deluxe, in New Jersey. I lifted the top bun and found two or three raw, cut up habaneros. Just like that.

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

dhag — how fitting for the armpit of New England! The reputation of New Jersey isn’t fond with its northern neighbors, I found Jersey City to effectively be a less busy borough of NYC though — and cheaper, and unlike the other side of the river having of clove cigarettes (illegal in NYC, cuz of course they are)… all in all, I kinda like it. But the state? An armpit.

Re: peppers — prepare to wince. I not once, but twice, scratched an intimate region, under clothing, after eating habaneros. That’s “fuck this, need shower” territory! Never do that. And never eat them wearing gloves, you’ll rub your eyes next winter and wish there was snow to wash them out with (yes, I did that too). Also, keep bread/naan handy, and wear pants when eating Indian — the chickpeas will lull you into false security only to make it worse when they roll.

dhag85
8 years ago

@Argenti Aertheri

Heyyyy. My wife grew up in NJ and lived there all her life until she moved moved over here 5 years ago. She was technically born in NY though. :p

Re: peppered genitalia – This has happened to me SO MANY TIMES. I never ever learn. Think sweatpants will protect you? They won’t. Burns right through, including underwear.

Kat
Kat
8 years ago

@Argenti Aertheri, @dhag85
You two live dangerous lives, not unlike the lives of — as I understand them — alpha males.

dhag85
8 years ago

@Kat

Pfft. A real Alpha wouldn’t work with fresh peppers. He’d use dried pepper flakes from a shaker. Saves you 5 minutes where you can go do the most Alpha thing imaginable: yell at feminists on Twitter.

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