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One of the favorite talking points — trolling points? — of Men’s Rights Activists and other antifeminists is that feminism is little more than a frivolous hobby for wealthy Western white women obsessed with their own trivial problems and caring not a whit for the truly oppressed women of the world.
Or at least that’s a favorite talking point amongst MRAs who are willing to admit that women are actually oppressed anywhere in the world.
I found the “meme” below on the Facebook page of something called Anti-Feminism Australia, one of the few “serious” memes there, buried in a jumble of rape jokes and fat jokes and digs at Anita Sarkeesian.
Just how wrong is this little meme? Let me count the ways.
First, and perhaps most basic, the graphic seems to imply that feminism is entirely a phenomenon of Western (and presumably white) women, thus erasing the very girls it pretends to champion.
I hate to have to tell you this, MRAs, but there are feminists in Ethiopia. Really. And not just visiting white ladies either.
These actual real existing feminists blog. They write, speak, research the lives of rural Ethiopian schoolgirls and work for NGOs. They make music and appear in radio dramas. They hold conferences and forums to discuss and coordinate their activism on issues ranging from family planning to international development.
In fact, MRAs, there are feminists all over Africa. There are feminists all over the world. And when we eventually get around to colonizing Mars, there will no doubt be feminists there too.
But let’s just set aside the actual real existing feminists who actually really live in Ethiopia for a moment. Because the antifeminist meme I posted above is clearly directed at Western (and presumably white) feminists , in an attempt to shame them for not fixing the educational system in Ethiopia with the magic elixir of money.
This too is wrong, wrong, wrong.
First, let’s just note that complex problems in developing countries halfway across the world can’t actually be solved by white-skinned angels flying in from abroad on giant clouds of money.
The issue here isn’t just the patronizing colonialism inherent in this idea; it’s that you can’t solve any intractable problem anywhere just by throwing money at it.
Men’s Rights Activists, allergic to anything that smacks of real world activism, seem to think that they can fix anything (and win some Good Guy points to boot) by donating a few bucks to this or that Men’s Rights cause.
But in order for the money to help, whether here or abroad, you have to have organizations in place that will be able to do something useful with this money.
MRAs and other antifeminists don’t, and so they have wasted literally hundreds of thousands of dollars on causes and projects and people that have pissed away their money without accomplishing anything of value, from A Voice for Men to The Sarkeesian Effect.
Feminists, by contrast, have set up a wide assortment of organizations in the west designed to help women, from national foundations to local shelters.
And, yes, they have built or helped to build organizations to help women and girls in the developing world as well — including some in Ethiopia.
While no Western interventions in the developing world, even charitable ones, can be entirely free of the taint of colonialism and colonialist assumptions, Western feminists today try to challenge their own assumptions and to treat the girls and women they try to help as the authors of their own stories and the heroes of their own lives.
In the process, western feminists have learned that the problems faced by girls trying to get educations in Ethiopia — and elsewhere in the developing world — can’t be solved merely by buying school supplies or providing cheap computers. It also involves fighting against sexual violence and child marriage.
And, as odd as this may sound to most well-off Westerners, for sanitary products. One UK feminist who recently spent several months volunteering first in Ethiopia and then Kenya, wrote later about the surprise she felt when she discovered that one big reason that Ethiopian girls miss much more school than boys is that they cannot afford the sanitary pads that would enable them to attend school during their periods.
That’s why a group called Femme International, working in East Africa, devotes itself not just to educating girls about hygiene but also providing them with menstrual cups so that they will be able to attend schools are regularly as their brothers. (And in case any MRAs are wondering “what about the boyz,” the group also runs a Boys Health Management Program.)
Tellingly, when western feminists have tried to raise awareness in the west about this issue, they’ve found themselves ridiculed, and even harassed, by uncomprehending MRAs and other antifeminists who apparently think that any talk about women’s periods is inherently risible.
When feminist writer and Guardian columnist Jessica Valenti wrote a column pointing out that “sanitary products are vital for the health, well-being and full participation of women and girls across the globe,” she faced a torrent of abuse on Twitter, of which the following Tweet was sadly typical:
Ironically, one of the nastiest Tweets — suggesting that Valenti needed “oversized” tampons “for her giant gaping vagina” — came from a fellow named Adam McPhee, who (as I pointed out at the time) just happened to be the official spokesperson for the Men’s Rights group called Canadian Association For Equality (CAFE).
Or maybe this wasn’t so ironic, as it’s fairly typical of the MRA reaction whenever they encounter evidence of Western feminists trying to reach out to girls and women in the developing world. Or, for that matter, trying to reach out to men.
You may recall the gigantic wave of hostility, largely from MRAs and other antifeminists, that greeted actress and activist Emma Watson after she spoke at the United Nations on behalf of HeForShe, an international initiative to encourage men to help fight for gender equality.
The attacks on Watson have died down, but the HeForShe initiative continues on around the world. Indeed, at an event earlier this year in Nairobi, Kenya, a number of influential African cultural leaders signed on as supporters of the initiative.
The hostility faced by Watson, Valenti and other western feminists whenever they stand up for poor and disenfranchised women around the world makes pretty clear that when MRAs and other antifeminists criticize western feminists for allegedly “not giving a shit” about anyone but their First World selves, they are doing so in bad faith.
Indeed, MRAs and other antifeminists would prefer it if women around the world were never touched by feminism at all.
Pickup artists fetishise women in parts of the world that have been less influenced by feminism than the West, and complain bitterly whenever they discover that some of these women have more feminism in them than they did even a few years ago. Indeed, repugnant pickup guru and rape legalization proponent Roosh Valizadeh has chronicled his sad and hopeless quest for the unfeminist Eastern European “Poosy Paradise” of his dreams on his blog and in an ebook.
Meanwhile, MRAs and GamerGaters and other antifeminists have reacted with outrage to the news that the Swedish government will be providing every 16-year-old in the country with a copy of Nigerian novelist Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s TED-talk-turned-booklet We Should All Be Feminists. (Note: If you buy her book through that link I get a teensy cut.)
The antifeminists don’t just hate Western women speaking up for their non-Western sisters; they also hate non-Western women who speak up for themselves.
This is sadly even the case when it comes to Malala Yousafzai, the Pakistani teenager who famously survived being shot in the face by a would-be assassin unhappy about her advocacy of education for girls.
After Malala was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for her bravery in continuing on with her campaign, a writer for A Voice for Men patronizingly declared her a “dupe of [a] deeply bigoted and socially dangerous ideology” — yes, they mean feminism — who may end up becoming “even more dangerous to world peace than Osama Bin Laden ever was … .”
Meanwhile, fantasy author, Manosphere agitator and all around nasty piece of work Vox Day has gone further, offering what can only be seen as a qualified endorsement of the Taliban’s attempt on Malala’s life. As he put it in one recent blog post (discussed here):
[I]n light of the strong correlation between female education and demographic decline, a purely empirical perspective on Malala Yousafzai, the poster girl for global female education, may indicate that the Taliban’s attempt to silence her was perfectly rational and scientifically justifiable.
This is, sadly, not the first time Vox has suggested that violence may be the most “rational” response to women and girls demanding the same educational opportunities as boys and men. In an earlier post (discussed here), Vox asserted that
[F]emale independence is strongly correlated with a whole host of social ills. Using the utilitarian metric favored by most atheists, a few acid-burned faces is a small price to pay for lasting marriages, stable families, legitimate children, low levels of debt, strong currencies, affordable housing, homogenous populations, low levels of crime, and demographic stability.
When antifeminists attack Western feminists for allegedly ignoring the injustices faced by women and girls in the developing world, it’s worth remembering that more than a few in the antifeminist army would prefer that these injustices remain unchallenged, whether by Western feminists, by Malala Yousafzai, or by the girls in Ethiopia’s Yegna.
There’s an awful lot of boys and men being mistreated in the developing world. Surely the plight of the young men enslaved by the shrimp industry in Thailand is a bigger issues than the lack of hot dates that western MRAs think is the greatest injustice of our time. And while they’re complaining about the draft that exists only on paper in America, but will never happen to any of them, do they even stop to think about the countless boys being forced into child soldier roles during various wars across the globe? Didn’t think so.
This right here is fine work, David. Thank you.
Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is fantastic, she’s the first person I thought of when I started reading the post and I went all fan girl when you actually mentioned her further in.
Educate women and girls in Africa? The horror! Improve female access to health care in repressive societies? Awful! What’s next, micro-loan programs aimed at helping women in Asia and Africa gain financial independence? Oh wait…
What a wonderful way to start off my morning… depressing, yes (is there anything these manbabies don’t sob over? Their coffee must be salty!) but also wonderful because look! Feminism! It’s working! 🙂
Thanks for bringing us the good news!
@Magnesium, I think I’ve seen some outrage expressed by MRAs over oppressive treatment of non-white men. Oh no wait, that was only when they were bitching that young Chinese men are having a harder time getting women because decades of female infanticide during the one-child policy period has resulted in a gender imbalance. Young Chinese women now have more freedom than in the past AND there are not enough of them, so a lot of young Chinese men aren’t getting any. MRAs can’t resist bitching about men who aren’t getting any. Thai kids enslaved by men for a lifetime of work? Not as much of a hot-button MRA issue.
I’m just baffled as to why saying something as completely uncontroversial as “sanitary products are vital for the health, well-being and full participation of women and girls across the globe” would get a negative response. I know MRAs are uncomfortable when the conversation is not about them, but I mean how is that something that deserves hate?
Every single time I think they can’t possibly lower my expectations of them any further, they prove me wrong. And I’m already well in the negative, here.
That whole “there’s more important stuff happening!” talking point has become unbearable. They say such as if they care when, of course, it’s just dismissal and deflection. Even with all the insincere rhetoric already in use – it really takes the cake.
Other than the fact it’s pretty shitty to claim any one big problem is “more” or “less” important – like one can’t consider many issues as important for differing reasons at the same time – their own priorities are either so bizarre or petty that their condescension is unwarranted. It doesn’t help when Watson or Sarkeesian and Quinn speak at the U.N., there’s this hysterical alarmism attached of how they’ll “take away” their videogames or censor their “critics” (i.e. obsessive trolls)…which obviously never fucking happens…
These people think lip service alone makes up for the fact that, in reality, they’re just egocentric and incredibly selfish. The reality is that they’re just mad about hearing someone else discuss a subject they don’t want to hear discussed, using an emotionally manipulative tactic to make them shut up. Besides, if some issue was so unimportant – why do they get that worked up about it, than just ignore it and be all the happier? No one is forcing them to read those discussions or even take part, yet don’t see how domineering it is to demand that people not talk about something instead of minding their own business. Purely on the off-chance that it might hurt their strangely fragile feelings.
@Kupo, I bet if men bled out of an orifice for 4-7 days each month the MRAs would be on board with distribution of sanitary products.
MRA is a misnomer. I mean, it”s the name they give themselves, but what they really are, for 90% of them, is “privilegied men with disposable income and stable situation right activists”
And by “Right activist” I mean them getting more liberties for themselve even if it infringes on the liberties of others. Any wonder why they thinks feminists want to remove liberties from others ?
I want to point out a few things:
1) it seems that whatever we western white women do is wrong, if we don’t reach out to women in other countries then we are narcisstic and don’t care about those women but if we do reach out to them then we are white Saviors or whatever.
(Sadly these kind of women do exist. We either do ignore them or fly in and do more harm than good. We seriously need to listen to them and call each other out when we are doing wrong)
but in reality they just want to stop women and girls from ever getting anywhere and just want all of us to shut up.
2) I’m tired of seeing these videos, etc of people saying “what if she was your mother or sister, etc?” When referring to women and girls who have been attacked, etc. If I saw someone hurt I would help them that’s because I have a heart that’s what people are supposed to do. Why do people have sympathy for an animal when they get hurt? We are not related to them so why? Because again we have hearts that’s what you are supposed to do. Have sympathy for us because we are people. Use your heart.
3) heforshe just like number 2 just use your heart. You shouldn’t be caring for people because it might benefit you, you should be doing it because it’s the right thing to do. If you are doing it for the wrong reasons you are not using your heart at all.
4) I find it absolutely disgusting that MRAs freaking WHITE WESTERN MEN are whining about white western women talking about issues in America and calling them “first world problems” rape, violence, victim blaming, abuse, etc are not first world problems. Complaining about paying for dinner, sexbots and ‘the friendzone’ are first world problems. They’re not even problems they are just made up garbage, they basically saying that having any moral whatsoever is too much for them. “Nice guys” amirite?
Then they use women from other countries and say they have it worse but they are also shooting themselves in the feet because then they have no right to have a movement either because they admit other people have it worse than them so they’re basically hypocrites. And they don’t care about those women either or men in general. They waste all their time whining that no one will give them everything and they have to work for them.
The people who complain “what about these people? Why don’t you help them?” Are the same people who don’t help them either and complain about stupid garbage themselves like I don’t know Mad Max? The friendzone? Other stupid stuff like those.
All they want to do is everyone to shut up.
@magnesium
Exactly. They whine about being hypothetically sent to war but ignore the young boys who ARE sent to war. They ignore real life slavery and trafficking of men into forced labour…while whining about the “forced labour” of dating (waaah we have to act like decent people just to get laid!) and “slavery” of marriage/having to pay child support. It boggles the mind how solipsist they are.
Because we can’t fix everything in the world all at once, there is always something out there that someone can use to invalidate attempts to fix anything at all.
It reminds me of racists who think you can’t or shouldn’t care about refugees “if you don’t care about homeless ex-military” – a big ignorant assumption that we don’t care about homeless ex-military, and when they themselves have never shown the tiniest weeniest sign of giving any sort of shit about homeless people of any sort, except as a stick to beat a cause they dislike.
Ninjad? Kind of?
@bluecat
Except that if you do decide to focus on homeless ex-military and how there should be support programs, suddenly the rhetoric becomes “but we need that money to fight Daesh! DO YOU WANT THE TERRORISTS TO WIN? HUH?”
It really is an absurd Catch-22:
“I have a solution to a problem!”
“Partial or absolute?”
“Well, partial, but it’s still something…”
“Nope. Won’t work.”
“Wait, why?!”
“If your solution doesn’t completely solve a problem – then you should just leave the problem alone, to solve itself. Somehow. Eventually. Maybe.”
No single discussion, much like no single solution, are ever that all-encompassing. It’s going to occur gradually in steps.
But if they actually look into the child soldier issue, they will learn that a good number of those child soldiers are–ewwww—-feeeeeeeeemales.
http://nytlive.nytimes.com/womenintheworld/2015/08/04/female-child-soldiers-can-be-victims-of-abuse-perpetrators-of-violence/
When my mother went to Zambia to facilitate a local village setting up a system of self-reliance, she was told that she should focus on the women because the men were getting money from building projects in the city. The men of the village objected saying that they were in charge and women shouldn’t have a say. After all, they had the money so they should have more say. The women disagreed and came with their own ideas by the metric tonnage. After eight months of organizing, the women had made some pretty huge steps towards self-sufficiency for their village. So much so that the men were no longer needing to take jobs in the city where they had a very high mortality rate because safety standards are not exactly standard.
In two years, the village was wholly self-sustaining and women and men and children all had a better standard of life. By focusing on the women, they had created a better life for men and had allowed the men to have longer life spans.
Weird how that happens.
This will no doubt be a terrible heartbreak to all the dork-enlightenment techbros insisting “We need to colonize SPAAACE so we can build new societies free from the taint of feminism.” (They seem to have mistaken the Gor series for a long-form policy proposal for a space program.)
Fruitloopsie:
This is usually called “The Oppression Olympics” and used by bullies to shut down any kind of activism The last thing any kind of racist,bully or bigot wants is for their all their victims to start banning together to solve the problems they helped to cause (or just sat by and watched happen.)
But this was a great article. These are all perfect examples of “intersectional” feminism.
I’ve been noticing this trend of projection going on in different axis of oppression too. In racism its the “you’re a racist for talking about racism” and in MRA circles it seems to be just straight up projection. Accusing your opponent of doing whatever it is you are actually doing.
I thoroughly enjoyed this article David. I hope you are planning to write a book one day – I would totally buy it!
OT: I seem to have gotten booted from your mailing list when you switched your site over. I tried emailing you but the email bounced back. Thinking if it happened to me it probably happened to others too.
Objectively speaking. Taking away the right to freedom of speech, specifically from woman-haters like Vox Day, would remove far more suffering than it would create. Still, I would not support it, even if it is tempting to put a cork in their hate-spewing pipehole, because taking away the rights of others is WRONG – and because it sets a precedent that could easily lead to vastly more suffering.
@TeeRee
Some men do. Ironically MRAs are just as shitty to them too.
Fuck’s sake!
I regularly donate to an organisation called Women for Women International, which operates in Afghanistan, Bosnia & Herzegovina, DR Congo, Iraq, Kosovo, Nigeria, Rwanda, and South Sudan: places affected by war and conflict. They provide training which empowers women economically, helping lift their families out of poverty. But while it’s an explicitly feminist programme, they don’t neglect the menz. They say:
If you want to learn more about what they do, go to http://www.womenforwomen.org.
This seems like it’s 180 degrees wrong. Isn’t there a strong correlation between women’s rights and economic progress? Why would currencies and national debt be tied in any way to women in the workforce? Or crime? Crime rates have actually been falling in the US over the last few decades.
And affordable housing? WTF does the run-up in housing prices have to do with women getting education and jobs? Housing has become less affordable for a host of other, totally unrelated reasons. Wages have stagnated, banks were creating money for themselves with mortgage loans in the run-up to the financial crisis, and people are bidding up the price of housing in desirable suburbs with good school systems. It’s virtually a requirement to have two incomes in order to buy a house nowadays. Women entered the workforce in response to this situation. They didn’t create it.
I like how he slips “homogenous populations” in there (read: all-white with lots of little white babies) with all the other unquestioned desirable things.
Also:
Of course it’s a small price to pay when you know you’re never going to have to pay it. What a staggeringly selfish, ignorant thing to say.
Outstanding post, David.