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Among his likes: Erotic wrestling, male authority, maroon berets. Among his dislikes: women and black guys playing prominent roles in Star Wars movies.
Over on FetLife, the kinky social networking site, a fellow called LordMichael lays out his objections to the upcoming Star Wars: The Force Awakens. There are three of them: The character Daisy Ridley, that black stormtrooper dude, and that black stormtrooper dude’s penis.
Oh, LordMichael insists he has no trouble “with having a diverse cast.” What bothers him, he says, is
the reason why they are there… the political “you go gurrrrl” message that’s being self flagellated everywhere.
For LordMichael, a self-described “Dominant Sadist,” the idea of a woman as a protagonist in Star Wars is
like taking a symbol of something from my childhood that I looked up to, that helped to shape the kind of person I am today, and smearing it up with menstrual blood marks.
Do you not remember a character by the name of Princess Leia? You know, who went around shooting people with blasters and stuff?
Well, never mind, because LordMichael has moved on to the black stormtrooper, who stirs up some, er, complicated feelings about race and, well, penis size.
This has a very big [Big Black Cock] Cuckold in your face feel to it as well… as the political insult to being male, and white (being black somehow excludes you from the whole being a male thing) continues to be an omnipresent smear throughout so much of the media lately.
LordMichael is especially concerned that by casting a black man as a stormtrooper, in a film that at no point will put anyone’s penis on display, director J.J. Abrams is somehow contributing to the popular perception that black men have bigger penises than their white counterparts. And this is a grave injustice to white dudes like LordMichael whose penises are actually plenty big, you better believe it.
No, this really is LordMichael’s main objection to the new Star Wars. Let’s let him explain;
I hear this statement said so often, any time I hear something regarding cock size “if his dick is big, it must mean he is black right?”
I’ve seen plenty of male penises, if only for the fact that I’ve been in sports teams, in the military, and I used to frequent the YMCA back when I could still run on a treadmill, and let me tell you, black people do not have any bigger cocks than white dudes.
In addition to conducting surreptitious penis size research in YMCA locker rooms, LordMichael apparently discusses the matter fairly regularly with men of color.
I’ve even had arguments against a couple particularly self absorbed young punks I could remember that said “I could get bitches better than you because my dick is bigger.” After asking them how big their dick is they said “9 inches bruh!” rolls eyes Please, mother fucker. It ain’t 9 inches. Realistically speaking, less than 1 in a hundred people have a cock larger than 7.5 inches, yet EVERYONE’S got a 9 in their pocket… I mean… come on??
In case you’re wondering, LordMichael’s dingle dangle is nothing to sneeze at:
My cock actually IS 7 inches, and people have a hard time believing me when I say that… which I don’t get. I’m white, which must mean I’ve got to have a 5 inch cock… and don’t tell me that cock size doesn’t matter.
Hell, penis-size-wise, LordMichael’s pink oboe is pretty much perfect, and by “perfect” he means it’s big enough to cause internal bruising, allegedly.
And besides, anything larger than 7 inches starts to become painful for the woman. Even my wife has difficulty with it at times, and starts to feel sick to her stomach from the internal bruising… and I’m not trying to brag by any means, I’m just trying to understand why this dialogue is even necessary.
Weird, because I’m also trying to understand why this dialogue is necessary, especially since we’re supposedly talking about Star Wars, a series of films that has at no point ever featured anyone’s penis.
This whole propagandizing and emasculating white men is just stupid as fuck. I’ve never been a particularly racist or sexist person… UP UNTIL women, and black men, started shoving this crap in my face on a regular basis, and now I’ve got “battered dog” conditioning starting to take place in my head.
Clearly, a white dude whose first reaction to seeing a black stormtrooper in a Star Wars trailer is DON’T CUCKOLD ME WITH YOUR BIG BLACK COCK AND BY THE WAY MY COCK IS PRETTY BIG REALLY IT’S PRETTY MUCH THE PERFECT SIZE was only driven to racism by having big black cocks shoved in his face, figuratively speaking.
So anyway… these punks are starting to believe that their cocks are larger than life because of the mind rot we see in the movies. They are basically selling out to the reverse racism because it suits them, which only lowers my sympathy for them, and then there’s the “little white girl” syndrome that has daddy issues so hard that she has to find the biggest, most belligerent black man she can find to feel as infantalized as she wants to be… without the consequences of having it happen with a “white man” (I mean, UGH! Right?) Because then she’s just feeding the enemy.
Oh, and by the way, LordMichael thinks it’s outrageous that feminist women (allegedly) persecute other women for shaving their legs.
I’ve talked to a few women who still shave their legs, and compliment them on it, and they nearly break down in tears because they get criticized from their feminazi friends for doing it, but then me, a man, comes along and says it’s a beautiful thing to do… it really kinda just breaks my heart sometimes, to see the state of things.
Truly heartbreaking, Now back to Star Wars.
So this Star Wars thing… The fact is, to me, what this whole thing comes off as… is NOT an attempt to be mature… to truly embrace an enlightened mind about diversity. Diversity should come from the creative mind, saying “let’s just add a ratio of different colored human beings into the mix, because it’s normal to do so, and it shows the variety of the culture.” What it comes off as is “patronizing” which to me, is just a subtle form of racism and sexism, but since it serves the little white girls “princess complex” and the black dudes “I got that big dick” complex, nobody gives a fuck.
Dude, you are literally the only person talking about giant black dicks here.
But I dunno, man… I’m tempted to not even watch the Star Wars movie because of it. It’s just getting too much for me sometimes.
Truly, it is the white man’s burden.
H/T — Ratgoddess
I’ll come with you! I can’t stand living on the same planet as Donald Chump! It’s killing me on the inside.
Well, one must remember that there ARE white women and black men who get off on that thing – you know, you’ll go on sites like ILoveInterracial or Fetlife and find black men advertising themselves as Bulls for Cuck Play, or white women advertising themselves as Queens of Spades (which is the nomenclature for white women who have that fetish).
They also constitute about 10% of the total population of white women and black men, I should think, so it still doesn’t reflect on the reality of the situation. I’m pretty sure these people are the exception, whereas, these confused white male MRAtypes think that literally every white female and black male alive today is in on the Cuck Fetish Bandwagon.
I’m gonna be straight with you guys; I went home from work today and didn’t cuck anybody. Am…am I a failure as a black male? Guys?
I’m scared.
Anyway, there’s my testimony, and later on, I guess we can find out if the white females of WHTM have sooper dooper seekrit lairs where they keep stables of sweaty, muscular, smooth-skinned black males, or if, you know, they’re just normal people who do normal things.
I used to be on FetLife and ultimately left because it has become overrun with MRA fuckfaces.
HIS WIFE GETS STOMACH SICK FROM THE INTERNAL BRUISING
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I can’t…breathe. It’s okay, I know, most of those guys have no idea how female anatomy works…. But one would think they know w where the goddamn stomach is, since they have one too. Seems they don’t. If you are going to lie about your penis being too big, dude, at least come up with a plausible story.
“Not tonight, honey, I have… a stomach ache. What’s that? A lie? No, uh…. well, it’s because your… your massive cock is too big for me and I have, um… internal bruising. Yeah. That’s it. I can’t have sex with you for several days because your great big dick is just tooooooo intense for me, so I am forced to just read my book in goddamn peace for a while. Because… your dick is so big.
Night, sweetie.”
#NotAllWhiteDicks
I would be surprised if they constituted 0.01 percent of the population to be honest. It’s a pretty specific fantasy. Only about 2-3% of people identify as gay in confidential polls, so I cant imagine that there is a higher proportion of people whose fantasies revolve around fulfilling someone else’s ideas of humiliation. Also the whole racial cuckolding thing seems pretty specific to the US. It’s not that I’m claiming we aren’t racist in Europe but it manifests very differently.
If Lord Michael thinks this is bad wait until he sees the Expanded Universe.
I have a feeling that for these MRA-types on Fetlife, the way they describe themselves as Doms and Sadists… it’s just a kind of clear to me that they are bad at sex, but they pretend that the pain they cause their partners is intentional.
“Oh yeah, I have a 7″ dick and it causes my gf internal bruising” = I literally only have 1 sex move, and that is to ram her cervix like a steam engine’s piston and I have no idea about foreplay… except I like to dress that up in a way that allows me to think that makes me super good at sex.
Like, I know there’s a lot of variance in genital size for both penises and vaginae, but if your partner can’t comfortably accommodate your dick without pain, you’re probably doing something wrong.
And even if some people are into being hurt by their partner’s dicks, I have a strong suspicion that that is not what is going on here. I know 7″ is well above average, but I can’t think of it as huge enough to hurt… I mean, TMI, but 7 is my preferred size and I’m not into pain.
His obsession with dick size just proves that he has literally nothing else to his credit, basically.
Ok I normally love what you write but pointing out that he’s a dominant sadist makes it sound like you’re using that to attack him.
Maybe just calling him a sadist would be fine but when you’re pointing out what he is and that he’s in an s&m forum makes it sound like you think that everyone who is into being the sadist is a shitty misogynist.
I know that that wasn’t your intention but there are people that think that people who are into that are assholes who can’t respect boundaries.
And now I feel awkward for bringing it up.
“Diversity should come from the creative mind, saying ‘let’s just add a ratio of different colored human beings into the mix, because it’s normal to do so, and it shows the variety of the culture.’”
To translate this dude’s whining: “diversity is fine, but all lead actors should still be white, and anyone else can only be a minor character. Anything else is reverse racism!”
It’s the same thing: “I’m fine with diversity” but they’re never actually fine with it, and always come up with some reason why it’s just “pandering” or “reverse-racism” or something.
Actually this is totally plausible. My husband is extremely well endowed and we have to be careful that he doesn’t bruise my cervix during PIV intercourse because it does sometimes make me feel nauseous. It’s pretty common, I’m serious. Google it, tons of couples have to deal with this.
Of course, him using it as a bragging point is REVOLTING, because who wants to brag about literally making his wife sick?! Anyway, my point is he’s being totally plausible, even though he’s a disgusting garbage can of a person.
He really should apologize to his mother for the effort she put into birthing him. He isn’t worth the stretch marks.
I feel for you, man.
Now I’m terrified the CIA is going to come after me for not filing any reports the times I dated black women.
Their domestic operatives are well-known for being brutal, efficient, and ruthless….
Well, for God’s sake, friend, do you at least you have a tail, or regularly engage in sex with animals?
Or…or is everything my Superpowered Melanin-having Black Teachers taught me about white people totally wrong?
Next, you’re gonna tell me a black scientist with a large head did not, actually, engineer white people in a lab. My life is a lie!
OK, I’ve been a WHTM fan for a bit. Definitely down with the idea of holding MRA BS up to the light and watching them run like fedora’d cockroaches. And at the same time, this came from FetLife. When a person joins FL, they are specifically told, in no uncertain terms, that what happens there stays there. Kinkshaming is real and it costs people their jobs. Does this Lord Michael deserve to get dragged for this? Maybe yes. Does he deserve to get outed to the world as a kinkster? No. So go ahead and make fun of Mr Top Master of the Universe with his BBC fixation. But I’m guessing that whoever shared this with the world has got some ‘splaining to do, too.
Steve:
If he’s being a massive dickbag and a general shame to the community? Fuck yeah out him. Make sure he never gets into a play party again unless he stops being a disrespectful shithead to women.
/).<
Is his real name posted up there? Any info not readily available in his profile? No? Then can it.
Or are we circling the kink wagons? Cuz I'm sorry, but you're going to have to ask very, very nicely if you want me to play power games. See, this whole telling people what to do schtick isn’t really my scene, but I suppose I might humor you…if you beg.
Do I need to drop anymore innuendo or am I making myself clear here? Cuz the face I’m making currently is akin to “I stepped in something, clean it up”.
@Steve:
Oh, come off it. Nobody here has linked LordMichael (aka M010N-L4BE, a name change that I find so hilarious that I feel compelled to keep on using it) to his real-life persona.
On Fetlife, there’s a fair amount of stuff he’s posted about his life. He’s told us the (fairly small) town he lives in, and the dates of his military deployment. Were I minded to do so, I could probably post these and allow people to identify him. Were anyone else here with a Fetlife account minded to do so, they could do likewise. None of us have. That’s because, as you say, we’re letting what happens on Fetlife stay anonymous.
Anonymity doesn’t mean we can’t laugh at him and doesn’t mean we can’t help others laugh at him. It just means that we don’t out him. If someone did actually out him, then that would – as you say – require some ‘splaining. Possibly even some ‘pologising. But that hasn’t happened yet because we are not assholes.
As Argenti says, let’s not circle the kink wagons. It isn’t a thing we do on WHTM. Non-kinksters don’t attack us, and in return we don’t feel compelled to close ranks to defend one another.
@Everyone Who Is Not Frank Torpedo:
I’ve been laughing constantly for about ten minutes due to Frank’s witticisms in this and the penis thread. I hereby move that Frank Torpedo be declared ruler of known space in recognition of his hilarity. Do I have a second?
Good points, but just wondering about whether you are allowed to use ad FetLife name outside of their site? It may be a violation of policy, since a good many people are on there semi-anonymously for obvious reasons.
Although I do agree there are tons of MRAs/PUAs to wade through on FL, it’s not only used for dating and spewing off, it is also used as a resource for meetups and safety tips.
I’m not sure such extensive quoting of this idiot is in keeping with the terms of use, one clause states:
You will not “Take anything any other person has uploaded, posted, or emailed to you, on FetLife and re-post such content anywhere outside of FetLife without the expressed written permission of the person who uploaded, posted or emailed you.”
Many other people fear being outed due to being kinksters, and while challenging dickbags is fine, please remember the other users’ privacy, and maybe confine more detailed accounts to within the site itself, with just a synopsis for WHTM perhaps?
i’m a fairly new reader of whtm and i really like it – the only negative thing i could say is that yer not helping my internet addiction problem at all.
another day shot to hell reading hilarious comments about numskulls. at this rate i’m never going to be a millionaire.
thanx.
Too much stupid. Can’t process.
On a related note, has a feminist ever, anywhere, given a fellow woman shit for shaving her legs/pits and/or wearing a bra and/or whatever other dressing/grooming BS misogynists say feminists always complain about? I’m not a woman so I don’t know for sure, but I’ve had some pretty in-your-face feminist friends, and I never heard (or overheard) anything resembling even a disapproving tsk at someone else’s shaving habits.
You’d hear some anger when people gave them shit for not shaving their bodies, but kind of serves you right for shaming an adult woman for not going to tedious and arbitrary lengths to disguise the fact that she’s a mammal.
*groan* If dicks like him could leave the lifestyle to good, tolerant people, that would be dandy. It’s sad that people like this abuse the lifestyle.
I’m pretty sure my parents had my tail cut off as a young child; my monthly Great Ape transformations resulted in a lot of collateral damage….
But I do regularly engage in sex with animals, as long as your definition of “animal” includes the full list of primates. I’ve got a thing for sapiens sapiens.
Doubtful, given that they’ve got melanin superpowers. Remember, your melanin superpowers can’t fail you, but you can fail your melanin superpowers.
Probably by doing things like going home from work without cucking someone.
Well now that’s just silly; of course a black scientist with a large head didn’t engineer white people in a lab. It was a team of black scientists with large heads.
They may have melanin superpowers, but come on…let’s keep this in the realm of reality.
I thought that was the cake.
Or are you saying your life is a piece of cake?
I mean, it’s possible, especially if they are just beginning to explore feminist theory that someone has given a woman a hard time over this. There are also women who feel uncomfortable with shaving because of feminism; I often struggle with this myself. I don’t like shaving, but society puts so much pressure on me that I don’t feel comfortable enough to go out in public in shorts unshaven. And when I shave because of that pressure, I feel like I’m a bad feminist sometimes. I don’t blame feminism, I blame the razor companies that put that pressure on us and I blame society for going along with it and adding to the pressure.
But the only time I’ve ever had anyone chide me around the topic of shaving it was my sister giving me a hard time for wearing shorts unshaven.
Ah, well, now you’ve got me in a sort of Morton’s Fork, matey.
If I were to use my Melanin Superhero Powers to cuck all the husbands of the the large-breasted, blonde white women (using the metrics Redpillers and MRA’s use, because they usually dictate that only blonde white women with excessively lush figures are prey to black men – don’t ask me how the HELL that works, I mean, do brunettes, redheads, and everyone else on the spectrum have a sort of genetic immunity, or what?), I would then have exposed myself to the legendary White Suicide Bombers, as described by my Melanin-containing Black Teachers!
And then, of course, they would go and report me to the CIA and the FBI. They might even report my activities on this website, and then, I suppose, poor David would be detained for aiding and abetting a Melanin-Superpowered Black Male® in Cuck-related Activities. I’m sure they have a division for it, wherein the White Suicide Bomber Agents are briefed and debriefed on their interracial intelligence-gathering missions.
Why, there might even be blonde white women posting on this very website who may have been exposed – virtually, of course – to my melanin! And they may even have husbands! The horror!
This really is a conundrum. I’ll have to think this one through.
(Ooh, I almost forgot.)
[Narrator: Is this the end for FRANK TORPEDO, the MELANIN MAN?!
Will he finally be snapped up by the CIA and the FBI’s crack, super-elite, expert, professional, crack, and elite Anti-Interracial Division, through the guile and the charm of the WHITE SUICIDE BOMBER?
Hill he finally uncover the secrets of Melanin Super-Heru Scientist Yakub’s Secret White Human Recipe, and gain the power of creating a UNIVERSAL ARMY of WHITE PEOPLE for himself?!
TUNE IN NEXT TIME to WE HUNTED THE MAMMOTH , with your Host with the Most, King of Earth, David Futrelle, and his MISANDRY VALKYRIES!
Kids! Don’t miss it!]
[Closing music:]