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Worried about your penis size? Blame feminism, MGTOW explains

Not everyone has a giant wiener
Not everyone has a giant wiener

The Great Penis Size Freakout Debate continues. On the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit, one of the regulars has dug up a Youtube video from a random woman who doesn’t like small dicks.

Never mind that men worry a lot more about the size of their dicks than women do — hell, one survey found that women tend to be far more concerned with proper pubic-hair grooming  than the length of their partner’s dingle dangles. Reddit’s MGTOW army saw this video as an example of rare female honesty on this perilous topic.

“[T]his is just proof if you’re not above average you are nothing,” one Reddit MGTOW moaned.

[I]f she complains and you aren’t small, next the bitch, she’s either got something wrong with her pussy or she got her head filled with some of her girl group bullshit, and it’s not worth the trouble.

Naturally, it didn’t take long for someone to blame feminism for the size queens of the world. ShitfacedBatman reassured his fellow MGTOWs that only sluts and feminists complain about small penises.

Date short and cute feminine women and you’ll never need to worry about your penis size. Date a woman prone to getting FAT, a woman close to your height, a woman with a big-ass ass, or a sex-industry woman who’s been cored out a few times and it’s “possible” size is a factor in those cases.

You know, women being “cored out” by large penises isn’t actually a thing. The sturdy vagina can recover from childbirth, and there aren’t really a lot of men out there whose penises are literally larger than a baby.

But, as ShitfacedBatman sees it, size queens are only lashing out because they are losers in the “tight vagina” contest that apparently all women are competing in.

Here’s the dealio tho: women that say size matters are saying they have sexual liabilities. To be submissive, pretty, and feminine is actually a competitive sport racing towards female smallness. Women by nature should be competing to be small, tight, and “innocent” – which means size should never matter and if it does it’s her problem. (Western feminism producing masculine women is incredibly likely to be at the root of the problem.)

Apparently the most “masculine women” are the ones with huge vaginas.

I think the whole “huge vagina” argument made a lot more sense when Larry David explained it on Curb Your Enthusiasm.

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Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Drezden

So you agree with my logic. That’s a win for me.

BTW, ths idea comes from nature, not me.

dhag85
8 years ago

What’s a paradox?

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
8 years ago

In my scheme, I would definitely be on the bottom.

Internet forums are not the appropriate places to air out your sexual kinks, unless the forum explicitly advertises that it welcomes same.

Drezden
Drezden
8 years ago

Walter my dear, I most wholeheartedly do not agree with your logic.

I merely pointed out that even using only your criteria, it should be considered a bad idea.

That’s not an endorsement of your logic, that’s pointing out it’s self-defeating.

Additionally, I suggest you reacquaint yourself with nature. She’s told me a great many things, but “little dicks= bad ideas” is not one of them.

Virtually Out of Touch
Virtually Out of Touch
8 years ago

Why were open urinals invented and why not in private cubicles like toilets are? Answer: men want to see other dudes’ penises

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Policy Of Madness

This has nothing to do with my kinks.

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
8 years ago

BTW, ths idea comes from nature, not me.

That’s right! We’ve all seen the National Geographic docs. Sometimes, two male deer actually get their penises locked together and end up starving to death. It’s tragic.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
8 years ago

This has nothing to do with my kinks.

Yeah, I think that’s actually not true.

Paradoxical Intention
8 years ago

Walter | December 6, 2015 at 1:49 am
I know some men here have disagreed with what I’ve written. They are just delusional and have believed the lies told to them by the media and society.

Actually, what you’re proposing is exactly in line with the lies told to men by media and society. Men are constantly told that the size of their dick matters, and if it’s not big, you’re a nobody. What you’re proposing is pretty much an extreme version of that.

I personally think it’s sad that they disagree with me, because they can never truly be happy until they accept that they have no purpose beyond sustaining the precious organ between their legs.

This sounds like something a misogynist would say to a woman. Like, word for fucking word.

“Women can’t ever be truly happy until they accept that they have no purpose beyond their vaginas!”

So, you can see why I’m super fucking opposed to this, yes?

You seem to be an egalitarian.

Nah. Feminist/Humanist. “Egalitarian” kind of has a bad reputation, so I avoid that name.

You believe in equality between all people, right? That’s a noble idea and one that I respect, but it’s just not true when it comes to those of us born with male genitalia.

You’re so full of shit.

weirwoodtreehugger | December 6, 2015 at 10:12 am

Maybe we should rank people by some other random characteristic to show how unworkable the system is – whistling ability, or detached earlobes.

I’ve got the answer.

Wrist circumference.

http://www.quickmeme.com/img/4a/4aee5737f48eab9e8cb6db02bfa99554ed1fe9ae28ff1deee18ab36755feb89c.jpg

Buttercup Q. Skullpants | December 6, 2015 at 10:17 am
If Moocow says this whole ranking system is nonsense, then Walter will have to bow down to his judgment.

I think we may have a paradox here.

You rang?

Paradoxical Intention
8 years ago

dhag85 | December 6, 2015 at 4:46 pm
What’s a paradox?

You mean in general, or the specific paradox we have here?

Because the specific one we have here is if Walter’s right, and men with larger penises should be able to control men with smaller penises, and Walter admits to having a small penis, thus Moocow, who has a larger penis, can come in here and say the whole “cockocracy” thing is malarkey and tell Walter to shut up about it, but if he does that, then Walter isn’t led by the man with the bigger dick because the “cockocracy” isn’t a thing, and thus Walter doesn’t have to listen to him, and thus can insist that the “cockocracy” is a thing, but if he does that, then he has to listen to Moocow, and then we’re back to square fucking one.

See where we’re going with this?

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Walter, I’m gonna spell this out in little words for you okay? You seem to understand small things better anyways. Your insistence that there are women, men with big(er) cocks, and men with small(er) cocks leaves me entirely unclear on where I’d even begin to fit into your hierarchy. That wasn’t a small word, sorry about that.

Your ability to ignore trans people, and assume intersex people just plain don’t exist, while claiming not to be transphobic… it’s truly impressive.

In even tinier words, people with tiny members are the bottom rung of the man club according to you, right? So men with no penis are even lower I assume? So trans men and afab non-binary people, despite calling themselves men or masculine, are inherently bottom rung. As are male identified people who where either born with an intersex condition, or lost their member somehow. But a woman with some mind blowing 12″+ member could be the leader of your penisland?

And you don’t see how this is transphobic?

(PS, props to anyone who read that as pen island)

ETA — I forgot to fucking refresh, I haven’t yet read this page.

NicolaLuna
NicolaLuna
8 years ago

This has nothing to do with my kinks.

I’m calling bullshit on that. Seriously, go back to your little penis measuring communities and get your kicks there. Nobody here gives a crap about your cockocracy and you’re becoming tedious.

Go watch some cuck porn or whatever. Nobody here is going to shame you for having a small penis.

dhag85
8 years ago

@Paradoxical Intention

I meant for Walter to answer that. Shhhh. :p

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
8 years ago

Cockocracy? More like a cockamamie-ocracy, amirite?

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Virtually Out of Touch

EXACTLY.

Drezden

Really? You’ve been listening to nature? Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?
Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned? Can you sing with all the voices of the mountains? Can you paint with all the colors of the wind? If you could you’d know why small dicks are a sin.

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

I realize by the time any one gets this far down they’ll likely know, but dhag’s link is utterly NSFW.

In other news, I just spent far too long looking at dicks.

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned?

Because of fools like you.

Virtually (and Walter) — um, because peeing in trenches was a thing long before flush toilets were? And it saves space, and water.

ETA — Katz? I’m thinking Pell, you?

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Paradoxical Intention

The idea that pens matters isn’t a lie. It’s the only truth in this world.

This sounds like something a misogynist would say to a woman. Like, word for fucking word.

I’m not saying it to women, though. So what’s the problem?

LindsayIrene
LindsayIrene
8 years ago

I really need to stop compulsively refreshing this thread, but I really don’t want to miss it if Walter dongifies any other Disney songs.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

On the topic of something other than penises, may I recommend you all go see Krampus? Horror comedies can easily go very wrong but this one actually has some real tension and scares while also being funny.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

I really need to stop compulsively refreshing this thread, but I really don’t want to miss it if Walter dongifies any other Disney songs.

I’m with you, but I hope he’s creative enough to not go with Let It Go.

ETA: Aww man. You can’t blockquote in the edit. I guess although the Blockquote Mammoth is slain, his vengeful spirit remains with us.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
8 years ago

I’m trying to come up with a motive for Walter to still be here. It’s obvious, at this point, that nobody here is going to run with Walter’s stupid, stupid idea. If nobody is being persuaded, what possible motive could there be?

Here are the two possibilities I have so far:

– Walter is an incredibly bored troll, for whom the remote possibility of gotcha’ing someone into agreement is more entertaining than doing homework or cleaning his room or whatever.

– Walter has an unusual sexual kink and gets off on talking about his penis nonconsensually with strangers. This is the interpretation I personally favor.

What other possible motives could he have?

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Policy of Madness

I haven’t said much about my penis. I’ve only mentioned it when asked about it directly.

ej
ej
8 years ago

@POM

– Walter is an incredibly bored troll, for whom the remote possibility of gotcha’ing someone into agreement is more entertaining than doing homework or cleaning his room or whatever.

I’m going with this option. The “check your privilege” comment awhile back is what really convinced me that he’s looking for a “gotcha” moment. It sounds like something an anti-SJW would say when they are trying not to sound like an anti-SJW.

Also, this comment from Paradoxical Intention:

This sounds like something a misogynist would say to a woman. Like, word for fucking word.

Walter’s comments sound like someone trying to adopt the language of their opponents. It definitely feels like he’s trying for a set-up, even though no one here has fallen for it after days of commenting.

Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

PoM — or he’s a returning troll who just enjoys fucking with us. That’s my vote.

WWTH — I shall attempt to summon the mammoth!

Beginning the ritual now

Continuing attempt

This might actually work

Though you could never do

it accidentally

BLOCKQUOTE MAMMOTH!

RETURN TO US!!!

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