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Worried about your penis size? Blame feminism, MGTOW explains

Not everyone has a giant wiener
Not everyone has a giant wiener

The Great Penis Size Freakout Debate continues. On the Men Going Their Own Way subreddit, one of the regulars has dug up a Youtube video from a random woman who doesn’t like small dicks.

Never mind that men worry a lot more about the size of their dicks than women do — hell, one survey found that women tend to be far more concerned with proper pubic-hair grooming  than the length of their partner’s dingle dangles. Reddit’s MGTOW army saw this video as an example of rare female honesty on this perilous topic.

“[T]his is just proof if you’re not above average you are nothing,” one Reddit MGTOW moaned.

[I]f she complains and you aren’t small, next the bitch, she’s either got something wrong with her pussy or she got her head filled with some of her girl group bullshit, and it’s not worth the trouble.

Naturally, it didn’t take long for someone to blame feminism for the size queens of the world. ShitfacedBatman reassured his fellow MGTOWs that only sluts and feminists complain about small penises.

Date short and cute feminine women and you’ll never need to worry about your penis size. Date a woman prone to getting FAT, a woman close to your height, a woman with a big-ass ass, or a sex-industry woman who’s been cored out a few times and it’s “possible” size is a factor in those cases.

You know, women being “cored out” by large penises isn’t actually a thing. The sturdy vagina can recover from childbirth, and there aren’t really a lot of men out there whose penises are literally larger than a baby.

But, as ShitfacedBatman sees it, size queens are only lashing out because they are losers in the “tight vagina” contest that apparently all women are competing in.

Here’s the dealio tho: women that say size matters are saying they have sexual liabilities. To be submissive, pretty, and feminine is actually a competitive sport racing towards female smallness. Women by nature should be competing to be small, tight, and “innocent” – which means size should never matter and if it does it’s her problem. (Western feminism producing masculine women is incredibly likely to be at the root of the problem.)

Apparently the most “masculine women” are the ones with huge vaginas.

I think the whole “huge vagina” argument made a lot more sense when Larry David explained it on Curb Your Enthusiasm.

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Walter
Walter
8 years ago

I’m not giving away my personal details.

nparker
nparker
8 years ago

Again, Walter thinks he can’t tone police, despite all evidence pointing in the opposite direction.

Walter, how can you possibly think you can’t tone police, something you’ve already tried to do on the matters of BLM?

Thank Rassilon you’re not British.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
8 years ago

I’m not giving away my personal details.

‘Nuff said. I’m pretty sure I don’t need a non-American ‘splaining Black Lives Matter at me.

eta: Or (especially) MLKJr.

Paradoxical Intention
8 years ago

Walter | December 9, 2015 at 5:10 pm
Yes, black people can be racist towards whites. It’s ridiculous to say otherwise.

Holy shit, you’re dumber than I thought you were. I mean, you’ve been sliding down the slope for a while now, but holy shit this might be a new low.

Just because Obama’s president in the US, it doesn’t mean racism is over, and calling white person a cracker or saying you don’t care about their white tears is suddenly fucking racism. There’s no history or system in place that keeps white people oppressed by black people calling them “cracker” or saying that no one cares about their “white tears”. White people are not hurt by jokes about how bland our food tastes or how much sunscreen we have to use.

However, there are still systems in place that keep black people oppressed, and stereotypes about them being thugs and drug dealers are actively getting them killed.

BLM is addressing them, as are many other people of color.

I can’t believe I have to still discuss this with someone in 2015. I really can’t. You’re willingly dumber than a box of driveway gravel.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

Why not, PI? It needed to be explained last year. Why wouldn’t it need to be explained this year too?
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2014/10/08/white-people-think-racial-discrimination-in-america-is-basically-over/

Argenti Aertheri
Argenti Aertheri
8 years ago

…I think I figured out why he thinks he can’t tone police. And then my head exploded.

See, the comic I linked used all these examples like “my pain is real”, “my suffering is important”, etc, in response to shit like “maybe if you weren’t so rude”, etc… he doesn’t think BLM is being rude, or over emotional, or any other example the comic used, he thinks they’re being violent — since that’s not an example explicitly given, he’s not tone policing. He dislikes their tone so much that it’s not tone policing because it’s not about their attitude, it’s about some other thing!!!

For extra stupid, black people are yelling! Stop the violence if you want us to respect your movement! …that exists because black people are viewed as violent when they really aren’t (and other reasons, but the irony of that one is just…)

Congrats Walter, the last troll we had that was so fractally wrong was Owly.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
8 years ago

I just want to point out that Walter Whitesplain has literally been ‘splaining the civil rights movement to black people in this thread. Congrats on being a cartoon character, bro.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

I like how he’s been wanking about his penis fetish for days but thinks telling us his nationality is too personal.

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

lol I’m laughing my ass off right now.

Now I’m “whitesplaining” and first I was “tone-policing”. Maybe next I’ll be Grand Wizard of the Klu Klux Klan! Or maybe I’ll just turn into Donald Trump.

Ridiculous. All because I think that BLM was wrong to bust into a lbrary and throw around racial slurs.

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

weirwoodtreehugger

All men have a penis fetish.

edit:

A “penis fetish” as you dedcribe it is just the natural male reaction to dicks.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
8 years ago

I have to say that I don’t find the “black people can’t be racist vs. whites by definition” construction to be a helpful way of thinking about racism. I don’t know who came up with that idea, but it has both logical and functional problems. If you run through some not-even-implausible what-if scenarios, you come up with silliness like a KKK member suddenly no longer being racist if transplanted to China, and structural racism being impossible.

It’s way better to just say yes, black people can be racist, but it isn’t actually important and white people need to stop being so fucking thin-skinned.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
8 years ago

All men have a penis fetish.

No they do not. ಠ_ಠ

Just because you and some men you know do doesn’t apply to an entire gender, because if they did, you wouldn’t need to be fantasizing about your size-ocracy, it would be real.

Stop this. Stop being so centered on what you consider correct and realize that there’s more to things, that people and movements are much more complex than you’re giving them credit or go fucking troll elsewhere you fucking douche.

Paradoxical Intention
8 years ago

Speaking of this conversation about racism, here’s a black transwoman on the subject:

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Pandapool

#YesAllMen

The cockocracy already does exist in most male to male situations. I just think it needs to be expanded and given gvernment backing.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
8 years ago

@Walter

comment image
comment image

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Pandapool

I don’t know your sex, but next time you’re with a male friend look at how they react to a penis bigger than their own. Watch them cower and submit, then try and tell me that the cockoracy doesn’t exist.

The cock is real, friend. The cock is real.

Policy of Madness
Policy of Madness
8 years ago

Speaking of this conversation about racism, here’s a black transwoman on the subject:

Yeah, that’s what I’m talking about. There are both functional and logical problems with this. It sounds really good, and I know it’s been used in academia to some degree, but it doesn’t really work.

The functional problem is that this re-defines a common English word to mean something different from what it means when everyday people use it. It’s not like words can’t change their meanings, but you’re always on thin ice when you tell people they’re using language wrong when that usage is incredibly common. On purely practical terms, you frequently wind up with one of two scenarios: either one person just can’t actually understand that the other one is using the word “racism” in a different way than they’ve ever heard it used before, or they do understand it and just flatly reject it. The conversation becomes one about word usage rather than one about ACTUAL RACISM THAT EXISTS ACCORDING TO EVEN THE COMMON DEFINITION which I don’t find at all helpful.

There are several logical problems with it. One is the KKK-member-in-China scenario I mentioned before. It doesn’t actually make sense to say that David Duke is only racist if he is geographically situated in a location that has a white supremacist culture. If racism is so context-dependent that I can literally step into and out of that status by getting on a plane, the term is no longer truly meaningful.

The video you linked says that racism is a structure, and I like how she said that was her view rather than some kind of universal truth, but there is a logical problem with that, too. If you say it is a structure only, then the people who exist within that structure become irrelevant to whether or not racism is a thing. By this way of thinking, literally nobody can be racist, because the only thing that is racist is a societal structure. It means that racism must be some kind of emergent property of complex social systems, and that means that white Americans were just helpless pawns and not actually responsible for slavery, or Jim Crow, or racism today.

It also means that racism can’t be reduced by just talking to people and changing their attitudes and behavior, because individual attitudes are irrelevant. While I won’t deny that changing social systems can reduce racism, it’s not at all clear to me that changing the attitudes of white Americans is pointless.

I maintain that this is not a helpful way of thinking about racism.

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

I’ve found some pictures from the parallel universe that exists only in Walter’s mind.

http://cdn.meme.am/instances2/500x/3291159.jpg

http://cdn.meme.am/instances2/500x/3291188.jpg

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
8 years ago

@Walter

What size queen fan fic did your ass crawl out of?

http://www.reactiongifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/tyra-no-no.gif

I’m pretty sure if you had a big penis, you’d understand all the downsides to them and wouldn’t be so obsessed about them.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
8 years ago

I don’t know your sex …

Way to not even read their friggin’ username.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Jackie; currently using they/their, he/his pronouns)
8 years ago

@SFHC

I think Walter means “genitals”. In this instance, Walter maybe, in fact, including trans people. Maybe.

Frank Torpedo
8 years ago

I am a male, and I like penises, but I am openly bisexual and that is to be expected; I’m not anticipating any cookies for this.

Walt, you wanna rub dicks together?

Rabid Rabbit
Rabid Rabbit
8 years ago

@WWTH:

Thank you. I am now going to spend the rest of my night imagining MLK Jr. facing off against Zardoz.

(In Walter’s world, MLK wins by default because while Zardoz may be a giant head, it’s still the wrong kind of head.)

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

weirwoodtreehugger

I’ll be sure to use those images next time I cover Lincoln or MLK in class.

Pandapool

If I had a big dick… Christ, I’ve dreamed of that so many times. All the things I’d do and fun I’d have. I sure as fuck wouldn’t complain about them and some fictional “downsides”. I would just be happy finally being able to say that my life has value and that I’m worthwhile human being.

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