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“Women REALLY don’t understand dick size,” Red Pill dudes complain

Measuring things is hard.
Measuring things is hard.

Over on the Ask The Red Pill subreddit, the regulars have come up with a new thing to hate about women: their alleged ignorance about penis size.

One Red Piller by the name of rumham730 touched off a discussion on this important issue with a plaintive query: “Why the hell do so many girls think normal sized dicks are “small”?

Runham730 explains that he had just had a conversation with “this 18 yo bi girl at work” that left him fuming. After overhearing her say that “every guy I’ve been with was super small,” he asked

how small, and she responded with “idk like 5 or 6 inches.”

WHEN THE FUCK DID THE AVERAGE penis size become “super small”?

I have a 6 inch dick so yes this hurt my feelings a little bit even though this girl means nothing to me. …

It just pisses me off. The chick who said this has no tits at all, but yet if I made a comment about flat chested girls around her, you better believe I’d be considered an asshole. Yet girls can make snide remarks about “small” dicks all day long and no one bats an eye.

Well, except for the dudes who post angry rants about it online.

As it turns out, the alleged ignorance of women re dick size happens to be something of a sore point with the Ask the Red Pill regulars, many of whom have strong opinions on the matter.

StarDestinyGuy noted that

One girl I hooked up with said the last two boyfriends she had had 11″ dicks.

The odds of that are so small it’s practically 0.

They are ridiculously ignorant/oblivious on the topic of penis size.

IoSonCalaf seconded his notion:

Women really don’t understand dick size. Trust me. They have no idea what they’re talking about. Half the time they don’t even know what dress size they are

FrameWalker added

Yeah dude they don’t have any idea. Girls overestimated my size by three inches at times. I’m average. I think half inch variations feel like two inches to them.

Dude, I hate to break it to you, but those women weren’t confused or ignorant; they were being nice to you.

MightyTaint offered his own math:

Girls are dumb as hell when it comes to dick size. A guy with a 3″ will tell her it’s 5″ (just a little below average baby!). A 6″ guy will tell her it’s 8″. A 7″ guy will tell her it’s 10″.

If that girl thinks 5″ to 6″ is small, she is going to think a 7″ dick is really 10″. …

The only women who brag about fucking big dicks are whores.

InscrutablePUA delivered his verdict in the form of a numbered list:

1) They don’t know what the actual lengths and girths of the dicks they’ve had before were.

2) Level of dryness/expansion of the vagina affects how big a dick feels.

3) Girls are just lousy at estimating dick size because guys probably inflate their own dick sizes.

4) Remember that the bottom 50 perhaps 80% of men are invisible to women. If the top 20% of dick sizes are 7+ inches then that’s what they consider as ‘normal’.

Wait, what?

Since the men of the world don’t generally walk around with boners sticking out the front of their pants, how exactly can women even tell which men are in the top 20%, dick-size-wise?

MightyTaint offered a rather different assessment, arguing that a man’s alphaness matters more than his dick size.

If a guy really comes off as an alpha, she’ll convince herself his dick was twice as big as it was. It just has to be otherwise why is he so confidant? Typical rationalization.

Niczar went further, suggesting that

Dick size only matters if you’re ashamed of it. It’s always big enough when you’re making her choke on it.

Lovely.

Suck_My_Zarflog, meanwhile, reported that the gemlike hardness of his average-sized zarflog penis regularly fooled the ladies into thinking it was bugger than it really is.

My dick is average, 6.5 at most. However, I’m well known for having a huge dick because…my dick gets really hard, like really really hard. So when I’m fucking girls it feels more “intrusive” than some of the softer guys with 8″ that I’ve seen… Yes, I know this from experience 😉 Most bigger dicks can’t get as much blood into them and aren’t as hard.

awalt_cupcake raised the possibility that women today have developed an intricate dick-size-sharing network, ensuring that all women can learn in advance the penis size of any man they’re considering having sex with:

I dunno man girls lately keep tabs on guys with big dicks. How could they not? Snapchat, multi media texting to prove it, the immaturity of it all starting in highschool when Billy MonsterCockTM had sex with Sharon the captain of the cheerleading squad and she told all her friends who ended up telling the world.

But he’s come to terms with the size of his own penis:

In the end, it doesn’t matter. Unless you get surgery to make your soldier huge, you’re stuck with it. Make the foreplay and sex fun for you and it will be fun for her (unless she’s a slut) and move on with yourself.

Just remember: never get married.

Cyberdellic drew a rather different conclusion. As he sees it, his average-sized penis — “5.75 non bone pressed and 6.25 to6.5 bone pressed” — will never be enough to satisfy the shallow “hypergamous” women of the west:

we live in full hypergamy so women will literally drop the guy shes with at any moment if the next guy ‘ticks all the SAME boxes’ PLUS hes got a big dick…

this is why the words of Wu Tang ring true – lust em but never trust em

most women are evil cruel manipulative macheivellian creatures… its not entirely their fault either, media and other guys make small dick jokes constantly

ive been living MGTOW the past 6 weeks and every aspect of my life is greatly improved except im not getting laid….

so to answer your question

with the advent of tinder and women being able to get pummeled by a new dick in 30 min (24/7) women have seen a lot of dicks and want to get that ‘stretched out’ feeling that is a mix of pleasure AND pain

they like that

ill never be able to go deep or stretch them out like the other men theyve been with

the ONLY workable strategy ive come up with is to move to asia, eclusively approach tiny petite 19 yr olds whove never had foreign dick before and im trying to find a tight hole

Dude, stop worrying about your dick. Your dick is fine. It’s the person attached to your dick that’s the problem.

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Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Katz

As long as you don’t think masculinity is better than femininity or that more masculine people should be in charge or something else ridiculous like that, I think it’s fine. I keep it as a competition between men. It’s not about being superior to women, so much as being superior to other men. It’s not even about attracting women, at least not to me, it’s just about knowing the proper pecking order of men and my place within that order.

catmara
8 years ago

@Paradoxical Intention: Regarding garment sizes and the mind-numbing complexity and arbitrariness of it all: preach on. I once worked on an IT project designing an inventory system for online retailers and it nearly broke me. For anyone who doubts what a minefield this is, just look at the Wikipedia article— and remember, those are just the official standards. Retailers can (and do) pull their own systems out of their asses all the damn time.

Ashley
8 years ago

When a woman brags about her exes dick size, she’s trolling you. Or as they might want to believe, “Shit testing” you.

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
8 years ago

@Walter

If you think there’s a “Pecking order” based on some fugly lump of sweat-marinated meat that half the bloody species has, you might be better off living with a pack of hyaenas. Or possibly are already living with a pack of hyaenas. Are you living with a pack of hyaenas?

Because that is not how human beings work.

(Also, bro, preening over imagined “Superiority” on a website that espouses equality isn’t exactly going to endear you to the locals. Just FYI.)

catmara
8 years ago

@Scented Fucking Hard Chairs:

If you think there’s a “Pecking order” based on some fugly lump of sweat-marinated meat that half the bloody species has, you might be better off living with a pack of hyaenas. Or possibly are already living with a pack of hyaenas. Are you living with a pack of hyaenas?

Female hyaenas are unusual in the animal world in that they can a) pee through their clitorises and which are, b) larger on average than the male hyaena’s penis! I dare say living with a pack of hyaenas would only make this guy’s adequacy issues worse…

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs

You’re welcome to think that. From my experience the idea that a big penis size makes some men more manly than others is common.

BTW, I support equality between the sexes, but within the male sex there are some men that are just better than others and it has a lot to do with dick size. That doesn’t mean that a guy with a big dick is better than any woman, just that within men he’s superior.

katz
katz
8 years ago

within the male sex there are some men that are just better than others and it has a lot to do with dick size.

http://replygif.net/i/1054.gif

weirwoodtreehugger
8 years ago

Walter,
I can’t judge anyone for measuring their penis. One time I put a scale on a table and plopped my boobs on it to see how much they weighed. So I have no room to talk.

But can you explain this pecking order thing? How could there possibly be a pecking order based on dick size? How do you verify that other men are telling the truth? How does a bigger dick equate to superiority? I’m confused. Why not ball size? Chest hair? Testosterone levels?

kale
kale
8 years ago

“why did breasts evolve?”

Actually, humans are not the only animals that breast feed. Theres an entire category of animals who have breasts, mammals. It is a function of feeding infants, so breasts didnt evolve to sexually please human males.

ramen
ramen
8 years ago

I learned my favorite dick statistic from Why Is Sex Fun?: the average erect penis length for an adult male gorilla is about an inch and a quarter.

For orangutans, it’s an inch and three eighths, if I remember right. Which is why they always look so smug.

Someone out there is calculating this stuff to a remarkable degree of precision.

kale
kale
8 years ago

the whole penis-shaming thing has actually bothered me because I think its something fellow feminists can be hypocrtical about. Like, I see feminists insulting a guy because he said something se ist by saying he has a small dick and I just wanna say, whoa, no – I imagine some feminist dude with a micropenis reading that and feeling bad, when we should actually be calling out a man on his behavior, not implying that certain body types correlate with being unlovable or an asshile or whatever.

Anarchonist
Anarchonist
8 years ago

@Walter

As a cis dude who has not given an ounce of thought to the measurements of my own penis, much less the measurements of other peoples’ penises (penes?), I can confidently say that I don’t know where the hell you’re coming from on this point.

However, I would agree with other commenters that establishing “proper pecking orders”, “competing” and “being superior to other men” based on outdated myths of what it means to be a ‘real’ man is far from harmless. It is exactly the ideas of dominance and sexual virility that perpetuate toxic masculinity and even when not outright harming women, still harms men that don’t conform to the aforementioned norms of masculinity. Establishing dominance, no matter how playfully, perpetuates harmful ideas that lead to much greater evils in the grand scheme of things. I hope you’ll reconsider.

RosaDeLava
RosaDeLava
8 years ago

@Walter
Do men use their penes like deer use antlers? I don’t see how it could be relevant otherwise.

Misha
Misha
8 years ago

Indeed. Why the penis? What if one of your manly dudebros has a 10 inch schlong but a shitty attitude, or a bad haircut and a wonder cucumber? Is he still “superior” to the rest of the nicer, better groomed pack?

RosaDeLava
RosaDeLava
8 years ago

Also, I just noticed that this whole reasoning excludes transpeople.

Walter
Walter
8 years ago

WWTREEHUGGER

For the most part it’s a mystery, but it’s revealed in certain situations. The locker room, restroom urinals, the beach, etc. In those situations once size is revealed men act accordingly. Some submit. Some are overcome with jealousy and end friendships. Whole relationships change once a big dick is revealed. I’ve seen it happen. People like Katz can roll their eyes all they want, but it’s true.

katz
katz
8 years ago

Hey, wasn’t someone earlier wishing for a penis-obsessed dude to show up and unite us all? Wish granted.

RosaDeLava
RosaDeLava
8 years ago

@kale
I know what you mean. I also don’t like when people say “MRAs are only MRAs because they got rejected”, for instance. But one of my favorite things about this place is that people call each other out or at least express disagreement when they notice this sort of reasoning.

Moocow
Moocow
8 years ago

@Walter

Along with katz and SFHC, I take issue with what you’re implying, because you’re encouraging toxic masculinity

As long as you don’t think masculinity is better than femininity or that more masculine people should be in charge or something else ridiculous like that, I think it’s fine.

Well I don’t. Toxic masculinity doesn’t have to involve sexist treatment of women to be toxic. This attitude marginalizes a lot of men who don’t fit the mold of what society thinks a man ‘should be’.

I keep it as a competition between men.

Ok, friendly competition of who’s got the biggest dick is fine. I have no problem with that…

It’s not about being superior to women, so much as being superior to other men.

…. aaaaaaaaand this is where your logic becomes incredibly problematic. No, penis size is not a measure of who is ‘superior’. Not to mention, superior in terms of what? Masculinity? Dominance?

It’s not even about attracting women, at least not to me, it’s just about knowing the proper pecking order of men and my place within that order.

That is basically toxic masculinity in a nut-shell. First of all, why must there be a pecking order? This is incredibly toxic to guys who are not interested in bullshit competitive stupidity

Second, why such an arbitrary trait? Why the fuck would penis size be the determinant for who is first in line for the pecking (I’m guessing, because I have zero idea what your ‘pecking order’ is supposed to be for)

Now, let’s actually play your game (WARNING, THE REST OF MY POST IS VERY TMI)

What’s your size? I’m 8 inches, and my girth is such that I must use magnum condoms because regular sized condoms are painfully tight on me (FYI the entire purpose of magnum condoms has nothing to do with length and everything to do with girth).

Thus, by your logic, if your dick is less than 8 inches, I’m higher up on the pecking order than you. What does that mean? What honors are bestowed onto me for simply being born with a big dick? Am I therefore ‘more masculine’ than most guys on the planet by being bigger than most guys? If so, I need to go revisit all the douchebags who bullied me, drop my pants and say “LOOK at my cock, I am bigger than you so you must obey me!”. Which brings me to my last question:

HOW ARE THESE COMPETITIONS HANDLED. Seriously, I mean anyone can make claims, so in order to determine a pecking order, do you have every dude drop their pants, undies and vigorously masterbate until everyone has a raging hard-on, then a person goes around with a tape measure until someone is declared ‘true alpha’?

mockingbird
8 years ago

Walter – What about Growers v Showers?

Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
Scented Fucking Hard Chairs
8 years ago

I dare Walter to drop trou in the middle of his next job interview/company meeting and demand that the dude with the biggest wang gets hired/promoted. For science! Go, prove your totally-not-ridiculous-and-kinda-misandristic theory to the world! The first-ever Nobel Prize for Dickology awaits you!

(DISCLAIMER: For the love of fuck don’t do this. It’s a joke.)

Misha
Misha
8 years ago

For the most part it’s a mystery, but it’s revealed in certain situations. The locker room, restroom urinals, the beach, etc. In those situations once size is revealed men act accordingly. Some submit. Some are overcome with jealousy and end friendships.

I just asked Mr Misha if the above is true. As he’s a cis hetero dudebro in his twenties who’s been to college and university where there are locker rooms and restrooms aplenty, I thought he would know. He said, “No. That would be fucking weird”.

katz
katz
8 years ago

To point out the obvious, if a person with a larger penis is better than one with a smaller penis, then a person with no penis is worst of all. So yes, this attitude is harmful to women, too.

RosaDeLava
RosaDeLava
8 years ago

Whole relationships change once a big dick is revealed.

Ok, this is hilarious. Petty, but hilarious.

nparkern
8 years ago

MRAs really are that ridiculous- the irony of saying women are ignorant, and then actively blaming women for things they admit are only problems because of themselves, is lost on these guys.

Off topic really (well, it relates to MRAs partially) but over here in England, the BBC are showing an episode of a Reggie Yates documentary, featuring anti-feminism (I mentioned it in one of my first comments here). I saw the ad a few days ago, but only today realised Roosh V was in it, and the synopsis says it also contains MGTOWs. Might be worth a look at, David, if you can find stuff about it from the sites you cover?

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