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“Women REALLY don’t understand dick size,” Red Pill dudes complain

Measuring things is hard.
Measuring things is hard.

Over on the Ask The Red Pill subreddit, the regulars have come up with a new thing to hate about women: their alleged ignorance about penis size.

One Red Piller by the name of rumham730 touched off a discussion on this important issue with a plaintive query: “Why the hell do so many girls think normal sized dicks are “small”?

Runham730 explains that he had just had a conversation with “this 18 yo bi girl at work” that left him fuming. After overhearing her say that “every guy I’ve been with was super small,” he asked

how small, and she responded with “idk like 5 or 6 inches.”

WHEN THE FUCK DID THE AVERAGE penis size become “super small”?

I have a 6 inch dick so yes this hurt my feelings a little bit even though this girl means nothing to me. …

It just pisses me off. The chick who said this has no tits at all, but yet if I made a comment about flat chested girls around her, you better believe I’d be considered an asshole. Yet girls can make snide remarks about “small” dicks all day long and no one bats an eye.

Well, except for the dudes who post angry rants about it online.

As it turns out, the alleged ignorance of women re dick size happens to be something of a sore point with the Ask the Red Pill regulars, many of whom have strong opinions on the matter.

StarDestinyGuy noted that

One girl I hooked up with said the last two boyfriends she had had 11″ dicks.

The odds of that are so small it’s practically 0.

They are ridiculously ignorant/oblivious on the topic of penis size.

IoSonCalaf seconded his notion:

Women really don’t understand dick size. Trust me. They have no idea what they’re talking about. Half the time they don’t even know what dress size they are

FrameWalker added

Yeah dude they don’t have any idea. Girls overestimated my size by three inches at times. I’m average. I think half inch variations feel like two inches to them.

Dude, I hate to break it to you, but those women weren’t confused or ignorant; they were being nice to you.

MightyTaint offered his own math:

Girls are dumb as hell when it comes to dick size. A guy with a 3″ will tell her it’s 5″ (just a little below average baby!). A 6″ guy will tell her it’s 8″. A 7″ guy will tell her it’s 10″.

If that girl thinks 5″ to 6″ is small, she is going to think a 7″ dick is really 10″. …

The only women who brag about fucking big dicks are whores.

InscrutablePUA delivered his verdict in the form of a numbered list:

1) They don’t know what the actual lengths and girths of the dicks they’ve had before were.

2) Level of dryness/expansion of the vagina affects how big a dick feels.

3) Girls are just lousy at estimating dick size because guys probably inflate their own dick sizes.

4) Remember that the bottom 50 perhaps 80% of men are invisible to women. If the top 20% of dick sizes are 7+ inches then that’s what they consider as ‘normal’.

Wait, what?

Since the men of the world don’t generally walk around with boners sticking out the front of their pants, how exactly can women even tell which men are in the top 20%, dick-size-wise?

MightyTaint offered a rather different assessment, arguing that a man’s alphaness matters more than his dick size.

If a guy really comes off as an alpha, she’ll convince herself his dick was twice as big as it was. It just has to be otherwise why is he so confidant? Typical rationalization.

Niczar went further, suggesting that

Dick size only matters if you’re ashamed of it. It’s always big enough when you’re making her choke on it.

Lovely.

Suck_My_Zarflog, meanwhile, reported that the gemlike hardness of his average-sized zarflog penis regularly fooled the ladies into thinking it was bugger than it really is.

My dick is average, 6.5 at most. However, I’m well known for having a huge dick because…my dick gets really hard, like really really hard. So when I’m fucking girls it feels more “intrusive” than some of the softer guys with 8″ that I’ve seen… Yes, I know this from experience 😉 Most bigger dicks can’t get as much blood into them and aren’t as hard.

awalt_cupcake raised the possibility that women today have developed an intricate dick-size-sharing network, ensuring that all women can learn in advance the penis size of any man they’re considering having sex with:

I dunno man girls lately keep tabs on guys with big dicks. How could they not? Snapchat, multi media texting to prove it, the immaturity of it all starting in highschool when Billy MonsterCockTM had sex with Sharon the captain of the cheerleading squad and she told all her friends who ended up telling the world.

But he’s come to terms with the size of his own penis:

In the end, it doesn’t matter. Unless you get surgery to make your soldier huge, you’re stuck with it. Make the foreplay and sex fun for you and it will be fun for her (unless she’s a slut) and move on with yourself.

Just remember: never get married.

Cyberdellic drew a rather different conclusion. As he sees it, his average-sized penis — “5.75 non bone pressed and 6.25 to6.5 bone pressed” — will never be enough to satisfy the shallow “hypergamous” women of the west:

we live in full hypergamy so women will literally drop the guy shes with at any moment if the next guy ‘ticks all the SAME boxes’ PLUS hes got a big dick…

this is why the words of Wu Tang ring true – lust em but never trust em

most women are evil cruel manipulative macheivellian creatures… its not entirely their fault either, media and other guys make small dick jokes constantly

ive been living MGTOW the past 6 weeks and every aspect of my life is greatly improved except im not getting laid….

so to answer your question

with the advent of tinder and women being able to get pummeled by a new dick in 30 min (24/7) women have seen a lot of dicks and want to get that ‘stretched out’ feeling that is a mix of pleasure AND pain

they like that

ill never be able to go deep or stretch them out like the other men theyve been with

the ONLY workable strategy ive come up with is to move to asia, eclusively approach tiny petite 19 yr olds whove never had foreign dick before and im trying to find a tight hole

Dude, stop worrying about your dick. Your dick is fine. It’s the person attached to your dick that’s the problem.

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Moocow
8 years ago

@Cerberus

Excellently put.

In the end, ‘penis size discussions’ have fuck all to do with sex or women’s enjoyment of sex and everything to do with competing amongst themselves over who has the biggest dick.

If the magic dick fairy was to bestow upon to them a large package, their first thought would most likely be “yes! Now those guys will respect me”.

Granted I might be too harsh, I’ve never had these insecurities myself, as I have a goldilocks shlong – neither too big nor too small

bluecatbabe
bluecatbabe
8 years ago

I love PETFAP as an acronym.

TMI moment: my experience of PIV has been varied, international and enjoyable, and while size and girth certainly varies, I’ve never found unfeasibly small (I daresay it exists, but not in my experience). But I have, unfortunately, found unfeasibly large and it was a pity. He was a sweet guy and a considerate lover but there was basically only one position that we could manage and that was difficult – ouchie – and left me little chance to flex without.

I do understand that external genitalia are a point of pride, fear and competitiveness and all, but these guys might have got over it sooner if they didn’t blame every insecurity they’ve ever had on evil wummens.

At least this little critter is a child…
comment image

Michael Shur
Michael Shur
8 years ago

David, sometimes you make me laugh out loud. That last sentence was great! 😀

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
8 years ago

I always thought that the small-penis ideal in ancient Greek art was due to the common genetic physical differences between them and their Gaul and Germanic neighbours. As ever, the characteristics of the master race end up being seen as desirable; if Greeks were smaller-pened than other people then by Zeus, a small pene is a good thing.

andrew682andrew
8 years ago

Interestingly, in those kinds of circles, it seems like large genitals are often ascribed to black men. The same people MRAs often deem genetically inferior.

bluecatbabe
bluecatbabe
8 years ago

*to flex without hurting myself* – I don’t know where the rest of that sentence went…

@ EJ (The Other One) I’ve often wondered about the role of display in all this. The penis-gourd wearers in some cultures seem to either go for astonishingly large gourds (so big they stick out over their shoulders and have to be supported by straps – making the early anthropologists’ description of the gourds as “worn for modesty” fairly daft) or more-or-less realistic-sized but decorative ones. In New Guinea the two traditions are often found in neighbouring or even shared territories, so it seems to work as a tribal differentiator.

The Greeks were a lot more into public male nudity than most of their neighbours – certainly much more than the great enemy, the Persians – so they may have had a more realistic estimate of average sizes. And of course their ithyphallic Satyrs and suchlike were figures of fun as well as of fertility and coarse satirical humour.

Ælfscýne
Ælfscýne
8 years ago

I don’t think women *believe” men when they say their dicks are a certain length … I think they (or better: we) just don’t really care about the number.

“Look at this, 15 cm.”
“Al-right. So?”

I’m not gonna take the meter and try to measure it to see it’s actually 13 cm instead of 15. Who cares? If the sex is fine, it can be 5 cm long for all I care. And no size helps a bad lover.

ColeYote
ColeYote
8 years ago

And guys NEVER make bad assumptions about average penis size, just look at that guy who says 6.5″ is average!

I’m a gay dude whose shorter than the *actual* average, but I really don’t give a crap about penis size. No matter who you are, I can find a butt toy bigger than you.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
8 years ago

@bluecatbabe:
I didn’t know that about gourds. That’s fascinating.

I need to know more about New Guinea, I think. The cultures there – especially the highlanders – sound really very interesting.

RosaDeLava
RosaDeLava
8 years ago

This is probably the most mediocre theory ever, but I imagine the things with small penis vs. big penis has to do with the fact that, the bigger the penis, the less “feminine” you look, and, therefore, the more “masculine” you are. Some ancient statues would have unreal proportions to highlight the maculinity or femininty they represented.

Also, a little bit unrelated, but weren’t women in ancient Greece (at least Athens) seen as super gross and considered only good for breeding purposes?

GiJoel
GiJoel
8 years ago

In other news, writer calls a guy out on shitty behaviour. He loses his job over shitty behaviour. Menz believe it’s all her fault.
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-12-01/ford-responds-to-sacking-after-offensive-facebook-message/6992192

dlouwe
dlouwe
8 years ago

No matter who you are, I can find a butt toy bigger than you.

Holy shit, I need to find someone to do a cross stitch of this.

Orion
Orion
8 years ago

I’ve just realized/remembered that virtually all my posts are critical. It’s a bad habit. I should make it clearer that I do like and respect all y’all. David’s post was hilarious, Cerberus’ analysis insightful, and all the personal testimonies appreciated.

Now, onward to pedantry.

EJ,

I don’t think her bisexuality functions as a status symbol here because she’s presented as a partner, a potential partner, or even a flirtation, just as an aggressor; I’d say that her bisexuality is mentioned to make her sound more threatening and like a potential man-hater.

Msexception,

How many women have you talked to about their sexual preferences? I would guess that it’s probably not many, if you’ve *never* met one who liked the jackhammer.

I don’t want to pick on you, but yours is one of a few posts in this thread that that pings a longstanding peeve I have with sex talk in feminist spaces; for all we talk about women-as-individuals, feminists frequently seem to exaggerate the rarity of minority preferences, especially if they happen to be patriarchy-approved. For instance, a quick google suggests that between 1/3 and 1/4 of women can orgasm from PIV alone, yet we often talk as though they were vanishingly rare. (Also, I’d expect those women to be over-represented in the casual sex pool) If a man says all his partners have had PIV orgasms, we tend not to believe him, even though 3-4% of men with 3 partners will have had that experience.

Similarly, I find this ridiculous:

“P.S. Using spit as the only lube is bad at best and horrifically deficient at worst;”

Yes, it’s important to make sure everyone knows that there’s no shame in using lube and that many women require it for a good time (or to make a good time a great time). But let’s not forget that genitals are evolved to self-lubricate, that for some women that’s good enough, or that some men have mutant spit that’s functionally equivalent to water-based commercial lubes. Adding a dab of lube probably does enhance the experience for a supermajority, but going without is certainly not “bad, at best.”

JoeB
JoeB
8 years ago

SFHC: “The lies really do get ridiculous, though. Like, I once knew a guy with a for-reals 9.5″ and he still told everyone it was an even 10. At that point, why?”

Generous rounding and “on my best day” seems pretty human to me. I’m not 5’8″ but close enough no one would ever call me on it (“come on, you’re 5’7″ and change”)

Saffi Eriksdotter (@SaffiEriksdottr)

You know what, I think any man who can look at my boobs and guess my bra size – within 2″ of band size and a letter of cup size, which is a big margin – has earned the right to mansplain to me about dick sizes.

No man who’s seen my boobs has ever had any clue, though, so I think I’d be safe.

mockingbird
mockingbird
8 years ago

PETFARP: Problem Exists Three Feet Above Red-piller’s Penis?

YEEEEES.

Triple bonus points for having it evoke “fap”.

mockingbird
mockingbird
8 years ago

To clarify: “Fap” being appropriate because RP seems to = mental mutual masturbation / circle jerk society.

Moggie
Moggie
8 years ago

So… negging: good when a man does it, totally unfair when a woman does it?

I’ve just realised that I haven’t washed my car for 6 weeks, so I’m now totally an expert in the unwashed car movement. It’s changed my life!

Saffi Eriksdotter (@SaffiEriksdottr)

PETFAP makes me think literal animal molestation, though, which … ew.

katz
katz
8 years ago

You know what, I think any man who can look at my boobs and guess my bra size – within 2″ of band size and a letter of cup size, which is a big margin – has earned the right to mansplain to me about dick sizes.

Men do seem to think all women have C cups or above.

msexceptiontotherule
8 years ago

@Orion – I was more referring to the Ron Jeremy technique of spitting on his co-star’s nethers and then going right to the pummeling. And then there’s anal, which involves an orifice not typically self lubricating to the necessary degree (you can drink a lot of water but it’s still going to be a rough going without added lubricants for *most* genital sizes).

Surprisingly I’ve had quite a number of conversations with women on the topic of sex and partner preferences, not enough to turn it into a scientific study or anything, but if I failed to note that this is simply based on these conversations and experiences, I enter this caveat on the record now. Maybe I should consider putting a disclaimer regarding comments on this subject matter being from personal anecdotal and recognized scientific research- sourced with a percentage gauging how much of each? Diversity with whom my conversations involve isn’t always easy to actually accomplish but shouldn’t be forgotten about, rather it needs to be increased.

@Saffi Eriksdotter

I have hybrid Tardis-Decepticon boobs. Most guys have yet to learn that a DD cup isn’t where the cup sizes end and that DD’s aren’t necessarily going to look all that big, G is not for gigantic, and H isn’t “help me carry these”. This can be helpful to demonstrate that a dozen women can wear a set bra size and none will look the same or fit into one certain bra style in that size http://www.brabandproject.com/

Ktoryx
Ktoryx
8 years ago

“Women really don’t understand dick size. Trust me. They have no idea what they’re talking about. Half the time they don’t even know what dress size they are”

Why… why s your penis wearing a dress?

dhag85
8 years ago

From my almost entirely straight cis (?) male (?) perspective, I just think a big dick looks nicer. Though I would have no clue what to do with it.

mockingbird
mockingbird
8 years ago

For instance, a quick google suggests that between 1/3 and 1/4 of women can orgasm from PIV alone, yet we often talk as though they were vanishingly rare.

ANOTHER POSSIBLE TMI WARNING

*raises hand*

Though with the caveat that prior to a few years ago they were exceedingly rare.

And, while I’m not sure about the underlying physiology behind them, I can say that (subjectively) they are completely and utterly different than clitoral orgasms. It’s like comparing, I dunno, a bucking bronco and a beached giant, opiate-infused jellyfish.

A few notes for lurking Red Pillers, MRAs, etc:
● I mentioned that they had been exceedingly rare until a bit ago. Perhaps pertinent leading changes include: * I’m older – over 30 (ewwww) – and better know my body. * I’d been married for several years, so my husband also better knew my body as well as how we work together sexually. * Again, we’d been married for several years and I’d reached a point of total sexual trust in / severely curtailed inhibition around my husband.
● My husband is *gasp of gasps* not the living embodiment of how you’d define an “Alpha”. He’s a sweet, considerate, hyper-intellectual programmer who (by all indications) is running around with undiagnosed Asperger’s – and is living proof that RP’s habit of throwing around “autisitc” and “aspie” as insults isn’t so much wrong-headed as it is indicative of their “self-help” movement’s extreme intellectual and emotional sloth.

Tessa
Tessa
8 years ago

with the advent of tinder and women being able to get pummeled by a new dick in 30 min (24/7) women have seen a lot of dicks and want to get that ‘stretched out’ feeling that is a mix of pleasure AND pain

they like that

ill never be able to go deep or stretch them out like the other men theyve been with

the ONLY workable strategy ive come up with is to move to asia, eclusively approach tiny petite 19 yr olds whove never had foreign dick before and im trying to find a tight hole

There are so many things wrong with this…

A) Assuming all women want the same thing (even excluding this amazing origin of why all women want this…
B) I wonder if he realizes that even if his premise was true, the “new dick” the women are able to get in 30 minutes (24/7) are attached to men who are able to get women in 30 minutes (24/7)
C) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, yeah, “That’s the ONLY ‘workable strategy’.” Way to put a lot of thought into that…

D) BUUUUT, if that were true, wouldn’t these asian women not have gone through the “pummelling” that made them need the “Stretched out” feeling? So that strategy doesn’t seem all that workable.