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Red Piller: Women are creating “a female Amazonian utopia, where brainless chimps feed them grapes”

What do women want? Grapes
What do women want? Grapes

Bad news, ladies: THEY KNOW.

They know about the Amazonian utopia, the breeding chambers, the grapes — everything.

Last night, on the Red Pill subreddit, REDPILLRECKONING revealed the super seekret feminist plan to take over the world:

[F]eminists see their battle as a genuine war. They have political motives, and they will not stop until they are indeed the dominant gender in our society, and anyone but their male breeding stock is subservient to them. …

Women are manufacturing a female amazonian utopia, where a few brainless chimps feed them grapes and they run planet earth.

How many brainless chimps will there be?

One at first, but he’ll train others!

Also note that women aren’t just trying to build an Amazonian utopia, but a FEMALE Amazonian utopia. As opposed to all those male Amazonian utopias out there.

With evil feminist ladies everywhere, REDPILLRECKONING complained, the male resistance has been forced to go underground, by which he means they have turned to numerous public message boards on the internet that they run and which exclude evil feminists and ladies and wait how is that underground again?

Men have literally been forced into the shadows to talk about how fucked society is getting. In the 90’s they tried to hide and talk in bars, now we have to go to the fucking corners of the web and hide our names for fear of getting our careers wrecked.

Note to self: REDPILLRECKONING isn’t that dude’s real name.

Note to self part two: Apparently in the 90s bars were secret no-girls-allowed sanctuaries for complainy dudes.

What makes the evil feminist plan even more evil, REDPILLRECKONING went on to explain, is that the evil feminist ladies have managed to win some totally desperate beta losers over to their side.

For example, there’s this one dude named “David Futurelle” who’s super-duper terrible.

[M]ale desperation is seen in David Futurelles article where he comes after me. Or when he goes after the redpill movie. He is the definition of a beta, supplicating to women for traffic and brownie points. The dude is exactly what is going wrong with our society, men that bend hand and knee to m’lady their way through life.

Oh, wait, I think he’s talking about me.

Which reminds me: Hey, ladies! Where exactly do I go to trade in all these brownie points for actual brownies? This wasn’t covered in Beta Male orientation.

Anyway, apparently guys like me

can wreck careers because they do it from the relative shadows. He hasn’t had his career ruined because he hasn’t had everyone in favor of free speech and world rid of insanity turn their gaze toward him, and honestly these kinds of people aren’t into ruining lives and careers. But I’ll tell you what, guys like him sure as fuck aren’t above doing so.

For example, I apparently ruined the career of some anonymous dude on the internet who calls himself REDPILLRECKONING by making fun of a post he wrote a couple of months back explaining that dudes can totally generate lady “tingles” in the Hot Babes of the world is by calling them “losers.” Evidently he’s still pretty steamed about the whole thing.

Also, and I didn’t realize this, when I write things on the internet, this apparently takes away the free speech of dudes like REDPILLRECKONING. And so the only way the righteous dudes of the world can protect free speech is to prevent people like me from exercising it.

We need more numbers, and when we get the numbers, hopefully we can focus blow up assholes that try to pervert free speech and ruin the lives of good people.

In a followup comment, REDPILLRECKONING complained that

Guys like this destroy careers. He exists in a world where he can rally juuuustttt enough feminists to create a cascade of shit wherever he needs, while remaining in relative anonymity.

Today I Learned that writing things under your own name on the Internet is a kind of anonymity.

In the comments, not everyone was ready to join REDPILLRECKONING’s War on Futurelle.

Indeed, the legendary Red Pill alpha GayLubeOil came to my defense, sort of.

Hold on, there do you not comprehend the magnificent beauty of David Futerelle? A man, alass no! An Angel. A magnificent 280 pound morbidly obease angel who guids us Red Pillers with his gentle cheesy puff hands. He is but a cherub who blows wind into our sails with his chubby cheeks.

Do you not see that it is Futerelle and his Bloopies that make the Red Pill what it is today? For without them who are we fighting? Why are we writing? True passion comes from opposition. True passion comes from having enemies and a cause.

David Futerelle has given us, has given you and has given me the gift of inspiration. And for that gift you should be grateful. So blow him a kiss and rub his breasts together in gratitude for it is he and men like him that have elevated this manosphere community above all others.

Thanks for the support, bro!

And yet another commenter dropped the Red Pill atomic bomb on REDPILLRECKONING, suggesting that he — brace yourself! — was manipulated by my insidious beta trickery into LOSING FRAME.

Dude, you’re losing the frame real hard.

This guy’s blowing your post out of proportions to make a case against the red pill is the societal equivalent of your girl getting angry at you and reminding you how three months ago you forgot to take the trash out. You keep your cool, you smirk and you agree and amplify.

Damn, son, that’s harsh.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I heard the bell ring. Someone needs their grape feeding.

 

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Buttercup Q. Skullpants
Buttercup Q. Skullpants
8 years ago

@Fnoicby

So how do I get in on this feeeeemale Amazonian utopia? Sounds pretty sweet.

Sign up for Amazon Prime. You’ll get free two-day worshipping from the grape chimps.

kale
kale
8 years ago

@Chaltab great minds think alike!

Tulse
Tulse
8 years ago

I’m making chana masala for my spouse tonight, so because that isn’t grapes I’m OK, right?

kale
kale
8 years ago

(TW) eh, a guy at my work literally said he wants to rape women “as a joke” and even I didnt report him. My mom DID report the guy who basically tries to rape her and all they did was move her… you can be a pig and have a job.

brooked
8 years ago

In the 90’s they tried to hide and talk in bar

Clearly feminists must have suppressed and censored the proud history of anti-feminist men’s struggle because I have no idea what he’s talking about here. In all seriousness, for me this the weirdest and most mystifying part of the rant. Bars still exist, bars where men can go and talk, so the inability to hide must be the issue. Why are they hiding rather than just sitting in bars? Who is hunting them down as they hide at bars? What happens if they are caught hiding at a bar? So many questions…

Binjabreel
Binjabreel
8 years ago

Amplify is basically to re-use the tactic used against you, but to hit harder. So she brings up you falling down on the chores a few weeks ago when she’s mad, so you (for example) tell her how much she sounds like her mother when she gets upset or something. Y’know, something you think will really hurt based on your intimate knowledge of her.

And, yes, it’s a fucking abuser’s tactic. Aren’t euphemisms fun?

the quai
the quai
8 years ago

“They have political motives, and they will not stop until they are indeed the dominant gender in our society, and anyone but their male breeding stock is subservient to them.”

Wait. Anyone BUT the male breeding stock is subservient? What’s the point of having a female Amazonian paradise if the guys you’re supposed to breed with are still bossing you around?

Also, I have no use for peeled grapes, unless someone wants to whip up a batch of white zin. Please leave the chimpanzees in their natural habitat; it doesn’t sound particularly sanitary to have them handling the food.

Wilson
Wilson
8 years ago

@SFHC – Seconding how perfect that edit is, that pear makes me smile every time!

BigKitty
BigKitty
8 years ago

Yanno, “David Futurelle” would be a cool name for your superhero alterego — his superpower would be traveling to the future with grapes from NOW, and coming back to the present with fabulously rare, expensive, delicious FUTURE WINE made from PAST GRAPES!

. . . oh, that’s not such a great superpower to have? OK, my bad. So, what superpower should “David Futurelle” have?

Antisocialite
Antisocialite
8 years ago

Redpillers that think they are what constitutes “good people” are always worth a laugh.

msexceptiontotherule
msexceptiontotherule
8 years ago

Breeder men shall be kept separated, their lack of subservience is merely a reflection of their testosterone-driven manliness that makes them suitable for breeding. Their only job will be producing baby batter.

I am truly horrified that I just typed that last part, but not enough to delete it.

zoon echon logon
zoon echon logon
8 years ago

@Newt

You keep your cool, you smirk and you agree and amplify.

My redpill glossary is out of date. WTF does “amplify” mean here? Does he actually mean repeat the criticism levelled at him, but louder? Simply raise his voice and carry on talking?

This is a technique for maintaining control of a situation/conversation (so you can always be the alfalfa, which is super important.) When someone contradicts/challenges you (especially a feemale), you normally respond directly to the challenge/contradiction by acknowledging it, disputing it, or with a further challenge. If your s/o says “You never listen to me” you might respond with “You’re right, I’ll try to do that more,” “Yes I do listen to you,” or “Well, you never listen to me either.” This is totes beta and may lead to horrible outcomes like having a reasonable conversation and communicating about issues in a meaningful way.

A true alpha will, instead, say something like “Yeah, I never listen to you. You never say anything worth listening to.” Don’t apologize, don’t dispute the statement, then take it further. Like a game of emotional chicken. This will catch your opponent (if you’re a true alpha all women are your opponents) off guard, and thus you Win.

Winning enough will get you sex (women love being humiliated and condescended to), whereas treating women like reasonable humans with their own viewpoints and valid emotional states much like your own will result in you being a Virgin Forever.

(/s)

the quai
the quai
8 years ago

@msexception

But if world-domination is the end goal, shouldn’t any hypothetical Amazonian overlords (overladies?) (ovary-lords?) ensure through genetics that these uncontrollable, testosterone-filled manly alpha males pose no threat to the future of the feminist dynasty? And, therefore, wouldn’t beta-male baby-batter be better?

I’m only moderately horrified that I took that phrase and raised you an alliteration. 🙂

magnesium
magnesium
8 years ago

Man, I want some grapes, now. Where is my grape boy?!

So, who wants to guess what REDPILLRECKONING extremely ruined career is? I’m putting all my chips on high school student.

Paradoxical Intention
8 years ago

No world domination is complete without your very own Cock Carousel!

http://i1307.photobucket.com/albums/s598/Paradoxys3DS/Cock%20Carousel_zpsvef9w1vt.png

(Will show up on the We (Kinda) Hunted the Mammoth store tomorrow as a shirt and a tote!)

eyesopen
eyesopen
8 years ago

Hilarious! Much better entertainment than the telly. Thanks everyone for your funny comments, thanks to David for the thread and thanks especially to the Redpillers who have made it all possible. I am off to bed now, feeling very amused and happy. Night night!

Jimmy
Jimmy
8 years ago

I’d bake you brownies and hand deliver them daily if I lived close enough, David. You feminist conspiriatorial devil.

raysa
raysa
8 years ago

I can’t put my feminist plans into action yet, I am so not ready.

I mean, I am still struggling with zombiefying men with my lady butter. I can’t get one dude, much less a group. So, these guys need not worry, at least not until I can get my zombie-man-butter army up and running.

But then, they need to watch out. MUUUAAAHAHAHAHA………

scalyllama
8 years ago

Damitall! Who let the cat out of the feminist Amazinian Utopia bag?! You just can’t trust some people.

(PS. You’re on great form today David – loved this post!)

Bryce
Bryce
8 years ago

Looks like David’s hands are full with these masterdebaters, what with those well thought out arguments and fatty jibes.

(Seriously, how was redpillreckoning’s job ever in jeopardy if he posts under an anonymous moniker?)

AAAtheist
8 years ago

Oh NOES!  MRAs are using decadent memes incorrectly!

They’re the ones that want to be fed grapes for simply existing hatefully.  I suggest they be fed shit instead.

Too late.  They’re already full of it.

steampunked (@steampunked)

Someone has been reading Sinfest’s older strips and taken them for gospel! I’m not sure that Tatsuya Ishida is going to be very happy though…

idledillettante
8 years ago

This David Futurelle dude needs to get with the program: he’s mindlessly supplicating to women, especially by *NOT* mindlessly supplicating to Cassie Jaye, director of that Red Pill movie! When will he get it and stop ruining the free speech of dudes everywhere by exercising his right to free speech?!?

I’ll tell you what if I ever see this David Futurelle I’ll give him a piece of my mind. This bending hand and foot to m’lady has got to stop; as do these career-destroying activities.

Mr Futurelle (or is it Futerelle?): check. Mate.

ej
ej
8 years ago

They know!

THEY KNOW!

painteyelash
painteyelash
8 years ago

David, were you aware that Lauren Southern, the woman who made the ‘Why I am against feminism’ video also were on Alex Jones’ show? I follow a YouTuber who has made a video about her racism and how she refuses to acknowledge that homophobia exists today. Also, she is against Slut Walk. I will link the videos, maybe there are useful to you in some way.
Is she a part of that Women Against Feminism group?