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Return of Kings: “Satan’s plan for the world is feminism and social justice”

Marduk: The Original Social Justice Warrior?
Marduk: The Original Social Justice Warrior?

Has pickup artist shitbag and wannabe philosopher Roosh Vaizadeh gone all Jack Chick on us?

Chick, you may recall, is the legendary fundamentalist Christian cartoonist who built a tiny publishing empire on miniature comic-book “Chick Tracts” spelling out the terrible temptations that lurk everywhere in our fallen world.

He’s not big on subtlety: in one famous tract, a heavy metal band finds grand success after signing with a manager named, I shit you not, Lew Siffer; two years later, one of the band members has died of AIDS, another of a drug overdose, and a third “is into vampirism.” But there’s a happy ending: After finding a Chick Tract, the lead singer pledges himself to Jesus, sending old Lew back to his home in hell.

In case his readers hadn’t gotten the whole Lew Siffer = Lucifer thing by that point in the tract, Mr. Chick shows him reverting to his devilish original form.

A setback for Lew, to be sure. But Mr. Siffer doesn’t give up easy, and the old man has been quite busy in recent years — at least if a recent post on Roosh’s Return of Kings blog is to be believed.

In a post with the title “Why Social Justice Is Satanic And We Need Religion To Defeat It,” Morman PUA blogger Rick Moser blames feminism on, could it be, SATAN?

Satan is every bit as real as God, and Satan’s plan for the world is feminism and social justice. Satan wants a world where men get publicly shamed for lifting too many weights at the gym or hassled by the school administrator for using gendered pronouns.

These may be small points in a big scheme of things, but hell is not some deep pit with grinning demons and flaming pitchforks. Hell is a classroom with angry, androgynous teachers and a skewed grading system.

And yes, he’s serious.

As Moser sees it, the “top priority for social justice is to destroy the authority of men,” and Satanic Social Justice Warriors have been undermining men since the days of ancient Babylon.

In Babylonian mythology, Moser tells us, a Social Justice Deity named Marduk famously murdered “Tiamat, the goddess of motherhood and beauty” and took up with the slutty “Sarpanit, synonymous with Ishtar, the goddess of sex and prostitution.”

Marduk did away with the old conservative ways and issued in progressivism. … Babylon was a feminist dream.

After reflecting a bit more on Babylon and other ancient civilizations, Moser skips ahead to the 20th century where, he says,

Radical politicians mandated laws that they said empowered women, but which really destroyed the family. They attacked people who were successful, destroyed personal liberty in the name of public welfare, and tore down the “hubris” of people who did not serve the needs of the community, the way they wanted.

The veneer may have looked new, but this revolutionary movement was no different than in ancient Babylon. …

Look at social justice warriors today and you see the same doctrine of universal salvation.

The solution? Right-thinking men and women need to embrace “[r]eligious patriarchy … the time-tested opposition to feminism and all forms of social justice.”

Lew Siffer must be quaking in his boots.

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jy3
jy3
9 years ago

In Babylonian mythology, Moser tells us, a Social Justice Deity named Marduk famously murdered “Tiamat, the goddess of motherhood and beauty” and took up with the slutty “Sarpanit, synonymous with Ishtar, the goddess of sex and prostitution.”

*blink* *blink*

Ow.

Okay, first, what the heck would killing a god of motherhood have to do with Social Justice?

Second, Tiamat was the Mother of Monsters.

Third, Marduk was a warrior deity. You know, an alpha-bro masculine guy.

Fourth, Marduk was also a god-king whose commandments reinforced hierarchy. You know, the exact opposite of Social Justice.

jy3
jy3
9 years ago

Blockquotes for the Blockquote Mammoth! Typos for the Typo Throne!

Depres1177
Depres1177
9 years ago

I’ve tried to the articles on this site but there’s no way to much estrogen floating around. I’m not a supporter of MGTOW by any means, but like the authors of this site are way to ashamed of being Men. Masculinity isn’t a crime and shouldn’t be treated as such. Every time you write an article trying to shame the Alpha Male movement, you actually make their point for them. You don’t have to hate Women to be a Man, but you don’t have to hate being a Man either.

Bina
9 years ago

Whoa, whoa, hold the phone…a MORMON PUA??? What the hell is he trying to pick up, a harem of “sister wives”? Does he neg them with lines like “You’re awfully cute for someone who shows too much leg and is obviously going straight to hell”, or remark on the deodorant stains on their magic church undergarments? Does he corner them against a wall and bore them to tears with the last lecture from the church “prophet”? I really wanna know how this bozo squares the one with the other, because if there’s one thing the church frowns on, it’s premarital promiscuity.

Bina
9 years ago

Also, speaking as a Witch who thinks psychology and evolution (and sexuality) are all quite awesome, I really have to wonder what’s so good about Fundie-Man’s god if he’s against all that.

epitome of incomprehensibility

Those signs remind me of one I saw on the news a few weeks ago. People were protesting the new Ontario sex-ed program (for being too “liberal” and “explicit” and whatnot) and one of their signs said, “Math, not masturbation! Science, not sex!”

I’m pretty sure that science also covers the study of the reproductive system. And “Math, not masturbation!” is a little bit like saying, “Apples, not skiing!” I mean, the two aren’t even related enough to be opposites. (Perhaps I could argue that doing math is like masturbation for the mind, but the since the phrase “mental masturbation” skews negative, people wouldn’t tell that I meant the comparison to be neutral-to-positive for both. Anyway.)

Orion
Orion
9 years ago

I assume that being a Mormon PUA is pretty similar to being a Catholic, Jewish, or Protestant PUA. Mormons really aren’t that special or weird.

justlikeheaven
justlikeheaven
9 years ago

Mark 34:12 “And low Roosh said onto the PUAs “No Longer shall we be called Redpill from now on we shall be called Neomasculinity”

It was only a matter of time before Fundies met up with PUA’s. I mean at this point I see crap my old youth minister (who was a raging bigot) used to preach spouted out of the mouth of MRA’s.

bekabot
bekabot
9 years ago

Christ, they can’t even get their mythology right. Cripes, cripes, cripes, cripes, cripes, cripes, cripes. Tiamat was a goddess of chaos (think Cthulhu with a hairbow) and Marduk, by lighting into her and tearing her apart, introduced symmetry into the world. IOW, Tiamat was an ancient Dionysian, feminine principle, and Marduk was the typical male bringer of clarity and order. Translate all that into the terms familiar to PUAs/MRAs and you get Tiamat as the arch-feminist and Marduk as the first MRA.

How is it possible to be wrong about everything all of the time? I ask you…

weirwoodtreehugger
9 years ago

Depres,
Please tell me exactly where the authors of this site (David and the cats, I guess?) said being a man is bad. I’m not seeing it.

Virtually Out of Touch
Virtually Out of Touch
9 years ago

“How is it possible to be wrong about everything all of the time? I ask you…”

By smoking a lot of pot. My experience with many regular tokers is that their interpretative faculties are off. They get narratives twisted, a lot. But sometimes they do come up with some interesting stuff. A new window on the world, as it were.

Virtually Out of Touch
Virtually Out of Touch
9 years ago

” Marduk was also a god-king whose commandments reinforced hierarchy. You know, the exact opposite of Social Justice.”

Where does this neo-slacker think he’d end up in a “hierarchy”? He better kiss the feet of SJWs because without them he’d be up shit’s creek without a paddle!

Orion
Orion
9 years ago

Marduk was also a young storm god who stirred up the ocean / tiamat’s body by playing with the wind, which is why she decided to kill the gods in the first place.

TheLulzWatch
TheLulzWatch
9 years ago

“but which really destroyed the family.”

What is family (or family-values) code-word for?

Paradoxical Intention
9 years ago

Depres1177 | October 1, 2015 at 8:55 pm
I’ve tried to the articles on this site but there’s no way to much estrogen floating around.

Way to assume that one, we’re all women, and two, we’re all cisgendered.

I’m not a supporter of MGTOW by any means, but

That’s pretty much exactly like “I’m not a misogynist, but…”

Everything after the “but” is the important bit, and usually screams “I’M ACTUALLY VERY MUCH A MISOGYNIST”.

I’m not a supporter of MGTOW by any means, but like the authors of this site are way to ashamed of being Men.

There’s only one. David may be a business of ferrets in a David suit, but they all have a hive-mind, so we just count it as one person.

Also, Roosh is a Pick Up “Artist” (PUA), not an MGTOW.

And why the fuck do you think David’s “ashamed” of being a man? Because he calls out other men for being sexist, racist jackholes?

What, he has to nod along with assholes in order to be a man?

Masculinity isn’t a crime and shouldn’t be treated as such.

Uh, where did we say that? Katie didn’t tell me about this. I was under the impression that we were shaming aspects that some people inherently tie to masculinity, even though they aren’t needed to be masculine. I thought we were mocking sexism, and possibly making jokes about toxic masculinity and how it makes men feel insecure about themselves to the point where they can’t enjoy anything in life unless it’s parsed through Manvertising and Manding to make it MAYUNLY like Brogurt.

Are you saying that masculinity is inherently sexist? Because we didn’t say that. YOU just did though, and that’s not a good thing.

I didn’t see anyone saying men should be arrested for being men either.

What is it with these guys and thinking that any “attack” on masculinity is a personal sleight that they have to defend themselves from? Hakuna your Tatas, bro. No one’s attacking you for being a man.

Every time you write an article trying to shame the Alpha Male movement, you actually make their point for them.

Okay, we’re not shaming the “Alpha Male Movement”, we’re shaming the sexism that is breeding in it. Y’all can go off and be Alpha Males however you want, as long as you’re not being bigots and treating everyone else like garbage. We don’t care about men wanting to be men, though some of us find their ways a bit silly. We want MGTOWs to Go Their Own Way already, we want PUAs to realize they’re full of shit, ect.

Also, I wasn’t aware that their “point” was “We’re all sexist assholes who whine when we have to do the slightest thing for women because women won’t bow at our feet for it and treat us like kings because we bathe”.

You don’t have to hate Women to be a Man, but you don’t have to hate being a Man either.

Uh, pretty sure no one here hates being a man, dudebro. What they hate is the idea that to be a “man”, according to Roosh and his ilk, you have to treat women like garbage. That’s what we’re mocking.

Argenti Aertheri
9 years ago

“What is family (or family-values) code-word for?”

Depending on group/person saying it, some to all of the following: husband wife monogamous marriage, no divorce, women don’t work cuz they raise the kids, no gay marriage (with or without “reparative therapy”), idk wtf they put trans people as but I’m pretty sure I’m just the devil incarnate since I adamently refuse to fit their gender binary, husband/father in charge, everyone submits to him, no abortion, he decides how many kids and their spacing…

Think nuclear family meets all the bigotries.

Carayak
Carayak
9 years ago

So, let me get this straight…a Christian misogynist is speaking about a vilified female from a religion of other gods, and he’s taking HER side? Is this even allowed? Should we call someone? In his eagerness to prove Social Justice is Satanic, he forgot which other things had already been established as the devil’s work.

I’ll forgive his confusion about the mythology, because research is another of Satan’s insidious tools.

mywall (@mywall)
9 years ago

Hail satan!

reimalebario
reimalebario
9 years ago

The more I hear about this Satan character, the more I like him.

(Although, as an atheist, I do agree with the statement that Satan is as real as God)

fastzander
fastzander
9 years ago

There’s no polite way of putting it. Conservatives these days have gone INSANE. They have gone completely, totally, stark-staring mentally-ill.

Spindrift
Spindrift
9 years ago

@fastzander

No, they haven’t gone “INSANE”. You don’t need to be insane to be wrong or believe irrational things.

You might want to check out the comments policy if you haven’t already. We don’t call people insane/crazy/etc here.
https://www.wehuntedthemammoth.com/2015/07/20/new-comment-policy/

ignorantianescia
ignorantianescia
9 years ago

Just a reminder that “Satan” doesn’t appear anywhere in the Torah.

Also, I get a recent small Satanist group did progressive activism, but conventionally most of Satanism, apart from their laudable attitude towards oppressed sexual orientations, is libertarian edgelording. A bit like 4chan with rites.

MissyL
MissyL
9 years ago

A Mormon PUA. LOL. While it begs the question of what, precisely, Moser is trying to do with these women once he picks them up (premarital sex is a HUGE no-no in Mormonism), I’m not really surprised by his choice of ideologies. It’s not exactly as though Mormonism is an egalitarian belief system. If you’re a woman, you can’t get into heaven without having a husband Jesus approves of. I wish I were kidding. Also, this is a belief system that clings to the notion that Native Americans are descended from Semitic people who fled Jerusalem and then came across the Atlantic Ocean in football shaped semi-submersibles in 400 BCE. So pardon me if I don’t buy Moser’s explanations of Babylonion or Sumerian mythology.

DISCLAIMER: raised in a Mormon household. AMA.

lightcastle
lightcastle
9 years ago

@ignorantianescia — Doesn’t Satan (well, “ha-satan”) show up in Job?

ignorantianescia
ignorantianescia
9 years ago

@lightcastle: Yes, he does! But only in the (late) prologue. However, Satan (the Accuser) is a bit of a different creature there, for he is a inferior member of God’s gods’ council there whose role is to be a critical stickler and put things to the test. The devil’s advocate before he became the devil, so to speak. The late addition of him to the book may be an attempt at theodicy.

But Torah = Pentateuch, in traditional religious framing also known as the “Five books of Moses”.