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Why the Ask The Red Pill subreddit is such a pathetic parade of insecurity and awfullness

Seriously, guys, just stop.
Seriously, guys, just stop.

The Ask the Red Pill subreddit (r/AskTRP) is an odd little creature. While the main Red Pill subreddit is an arena filled to overflowing with comically swaggering self-proclaimed alpha dogs, all competing to out-alpha one another, AskTRP is an endless parade of insecurities.

Ostensibly a place where uncertain Red Pill newbies can turn for advice and worldly wisdom from experienced “alphas,” the subreddit is really an object lesson in the many ways “red pill” thinking can fuck up your life and your relationships. The questions being asked are cringeworthy; the answers only a little less so.

One hapless would-be alpha wonders what to do about his girlfriend … walking in front of him.

Still very knew to TRP. Im not exactly sure how to respond to this. If its a shit test or a symptom of failing many shit tests all together. Anyways, whenever we walk (which we do often, bring dog to park, around the hood, whatever) she tries to walk a half step in front of me.

The horror!

Last time we were walking back the 3 blocks from the market and I was in front she kept speeding up. So I would speed up, the pace got absolutely laughable. How would you deal with this, lets say walking through the park and she keeps jumping out front?

Instead of shaking this “knew” Red Piller and telling him to chill the fuck out because who fucking cares, you could just ask her to slow down a little jesus christ what the fuck is your fucking problem, the regulars offer an assortment of Red Pill clichés seemingly designed to heighten his insecurities and turn his girlfriend’s walking habits into some sort of contest.

Then you set the pace. Slow down and let her ass walk away.

To me this is a chance to play dumb games with her if that’s what she wants to do. Make stops when you want, change directions, go your own way and make her follow your lead.

When in doubt, act like a petulant teenager who’s never been in a relationship before.

Another newbie wonders what to do now that he’s no longer the buffest dude in his church group. No, really.

So long story short ive been going to church and most guys dont lift there or arent in very athletic shape, but today we got a new guy and when he went up to take the podium i felt sort of amogged (biceps wise).

AMOG= Alpha Male of the Group. The dude was out-alphaing him with his giant biceps.

Dude was in a shirt showing off his building like frame and it got to me. My pride took a hit because i could literally feel the temperature rising as the women and men stared in awe of his Sylvester stalone like stature. 

I dunno, ask him out, maybe?

How do i deal with no longer being the one with the most impressive biceps? Can i supplement it with other things? For example, im 3 years older than the dude and i have good game, more knowledge about women’s nature than he does, so do you think its not the end of the world no longer being the most ‘alpha’ looking of the group?

And a would-be alpha teeters on the edge of self-awareness.

I am starting my bulk next week because i realized im not as big as i could be.

… and plunges back into insecurity.

And no, im not insecure im just curious about how to stand out as alpha amongst someone twice your size. The girls were giving me the googly eyes before and id like to keep it that way. I must stay AMOG .

Dude, get a grip on yourself.

In this case, the advice is much less cringey than the question. Sure, there’s one guy who tells him he absolutely needs to get bigger and buffer than his new rival, and another who sniffs that “‘going to church’ is kinda beta in my books,” but a few others tell him to, you know, not get so fixated on the size of another dude’s biceps, because that way endless insecurity lies.

there’s always going to be somebody bigger and better at something than you are. you should work on not letting it effect you more than you should work on getting bigger than the bigger guy or smarter than the smarter guy.

Elsewhere in the subreddit, another would-be alpha is stunned to discover that, contrary to a lot of Red Pill “teachings,” acting like a serial killer doesn’t always inspire adoration from the ladies. After snapchatting flirtatiously with a new prospect, he reports,

she tells me I scare her. I ask how do I scare her and she says she gets dark vibes from me. One of my public snapchat stories was a demonic doodle for shits, gigs, and boredom. I tell her she’s not wrong (I told her in an earlier convo that I’m an asshole) and that she gives off soft sensual vibes.

That’s a first for me to be told I’m scary. I’m not overly concerned but I was surprised that the whole dark thing took a turn that made her stop engaging with me. I thought it was like catnip.

So, so close to self-awareness.

The regulars aren’t much help. “Amused mastery,” advises one. Take her for a ride on your motorcycle, advises another. Still another suggests what he apparently thinks is “humor.”

[Agree] & [Amplify] with a sexual twist. “Yeah I get that a lot cuz I make the ladies scream” gotta be witty man especially when texting / snapping sexual stuff.

Another notes that real serial killer types don’t actually try to come across as serial killer types.

Dark triad isn’t attractive as such imo; there’s an overlap between alpha traits and dark triad traits, sure, and that is what the girls want while the rest is a turn off. Actual psychopaths wear a facade and don’t show their true colors when they want to manipulate people; there’s a reason for that.

WWTBD: What Would Ted Bundy Do?

In another thread, an aspiring alpha wonders if it might be a good idea to read something other than The Red Pill subreddit or self-help books.

So I woke up today and I work through tasks for like 4 hours, rest, go to the gym, watch a movie (going through the IMBD top 100 so I catch up with pop culture so I can entertain a conversation with a boring girl sometimes),

Wat.

then right back to cleaning room / washing clothes. I was thinking about getting a fiction book from this list:

He links to a rather unimaginative list of old-school literary classics that he found on a forum devoted to fitness.

But then I thought… “What would Red pill do in my position”. I could be meditating or continuing to read through Book of Pook or these other books but I feel like I should also be giving myself time when I don’t work. How valid is that? Lastly… fiction, or no fiction?

Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?

I’m not going to bother with the answers here; suffice it to say that they’re a bit less cringey than the questions.

But it’s striking how many of these would-be alphas sound like the most insecure dudes on planet earth.

I mean, sure, everyone deals with insecurity. And there are few people more insecure than those who, like a lot of these guys, are starting to date for the first time. But fucking hell, man,

The problem isn’t just that “Red Pill” wisdom is turning them into assholes. The Red Pill is quite obviously amplifying their anxieties as well. It’s hard enough to introduce yourself to someone you’re attracted to, but it’s a lot harder if you’re also obsessing about being the Alpha Male of the Group.

Seriously, guys. Chill out. Trying to banish your insecurities by becoming the buffest dude in the church group — or the smoothest Game-spitter at the club — isn’t going to work.

The Red Pill won’t get rid of your insecurities; it will only encourage you to overcompensate for them with misogynistic macho bluster. You won’t emerge from your Red Pill training a happy, secure man who’s a natural with women; you’ll end up an embittered asshole preening and posturing on The Red Pill subreddit. And that’s the BEST CASE SCENARIO.

Fuck that. Be who you are. Read whatever books you want. Stop freaking out that your girlfriend walks a couple of paces ahead of you. Banish the word “alpha” from your life. Move the fuck on.

 

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Parse The Potatoes
5 years ago

@Alex Bissonnette:

Why do these guys feel the need to ask strangers on the internet for relationship advice? They have a perfectly good person they are supposedly involved with romantically to talk to.

I realize this was supposed to be snark, but you could really say the same thing about most of the people who write in to Captain Awkward or Doctor Nerdlove. The thing is, they aren’t asking complete dial-a-random-number-and-hope-they-pick-up strangers; they’re asking strangers who will give them the sort of advice they’re looking for.

If I write in to Captain Awkward, it’s because I want to hear possible scripts, including ones I didn’t expect (from ‘dump that asshole’ to ‘you might be the asshole here’) – but always with respect towards all parties involved. If I write in to Ask The Red Pillocks, it’s because I want to be told how I’m insufficiently macho in explicit detail.

Zeb Berryman
Zeb Berryman
5 years ago

“So I woke up today and I work through tasks for like 4 hours, rest, go to the gym, watch a movie (going through the IMBD top 100 so I catch up with pop culture so I can entertain a conversation with a boring girl sometimes),”

Okay this is just sad. I can say from experience that there is nothing is more boring then a conversation with someone who watches or reads something for any reason other then genuine interest. Read what you like. Watch movies you enjoy. Genuine passion is always more interesting then faked interest.

BeyondOcean
BeyondOcean
5 years ago

Of course red pill clients are going to be riddled with insecurity – they seem to be so afraid of rejection, that they subscribe to a viewpoint that tells them that if they master the “Game”, they will be able to get any woman by their own effort only, without having to worry about such terrifying things as any actual input from her.

Of course, on top of that, they also seem to care about sex only as far as it makes them feel not-inferior to any other man. So that’s two insecurities? Whichever came first.

I wonder, who are those “Chads” they keep talking about? From what they say, it seems like they’re the most alpha of alpha dudes, but no redpillers ever refer to themselves as such, at least from what I’ve seen. So, are “Chads” dudes that can have sex with women without having to refer to the red pill bullshit? Essentially, cheaters in the Game?

@BryHitchcock

“The wolves of this world would love it if all humans left the word “alpha” behind. That is all.”

Hey, the original researcher who coined the word “alpha” would like humans to leave it behind, and even plead to publishers to stop reprinting his outdated book, but without success.

Cause it’s not about wolves, but our preconceived cultural notions.

Tracy
Tracy
5 years ago

So basically these guys want to be speedwalking, hulkified passionless Hannibal Lecters who drone on endlessly about mediocre films and books they didn’t enjoy. OMG sign me up, sounds irresistible.

The walking thing – I am short short short and I walk really, really fast. Like, wear out the heels of my shoes fast. This is because I’m used to having to try and keep up with people, I guess? Though my sister is a fast walker too, and taller than me – she has a hip thing, and if she has to walk too slowly it’s uncomfortable for her. Anyway, this woman may have been trying to keep up with him, and then him speeding up made her walk faster. Also, holy shit just TALK ABOUT IT, what the hell.

Tracy
Tracy
5 years ago

I just realized the whole thing reminds me of the business card scene in American Psycho.

http://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/PaulAllenBusinessCard.jpg

If one of them launches into a lengthy examination of Phil Collins ‘Susudio’, call the police immediately.

Bina
Bina
5 years ago

On the book thread listed above a commenter mentions Ursula K. LeGuin as one of his favorite authors. That level of cognitive dissonance is truly impressive.

Sssshhhhh, don’t anyone tell them she’s a huuuuuge feminist. Irony is lost on the ironic!

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

I like The Ear, the Eye and the Arm.

Moocow
Moocow
5 years ago

@Tracy

Also, holy shit just TALK ABOUT IT, what the hell.

^ Literally solves like 99% on dating problems these guys have.

There were soooooo many things I use to obsess over or worry about or be embarrassed about. And yet, any partner I’ve had has been completely understanding. In fact, many times they even liked those things about me and that made me realize I shouldn’t worry so much about myself and that there wasn’t anything ‘wrong’ with me. (Fast forward to now and I’ve learned that most of those insecurities were there because I failed to conform to toxic masculinity)

Just one of the many joys in relationships that Red pill idiots will never learn because it requires seeing and respecting your partner as a human being.

Also, nice parallel with American Psycho. Although they’d probably look at Bateman and be like “he’s totally alpha” even though his cool and calculated persona was just a facade for his massive inferiority complex and countless insecurities.

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

On muscles, there are indeed women who like muscular men however I always thought that the media (shows, commercials, etc) forces this standard unto men not becuase its sexy but it’s to be seen as strong so it’s a male power fantasy. We’re socialized to see muscles (men’s bodies in general) as strong and breasts (womens’ bodies in general) as sexy. It hurts both genders becuase we are basically telling women they can’t be strong and men can’t be sexy.

Booberry and Moocow

Hugs if you need them.

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

@Fruitloopsie: I like muscular women too, to be honest.

For instance:

Sakura Oogami from Dangan Ronpa (she’s the taller one.)

http://images6.fanpop.com/image/photos/36400000/Sakura-Oogami-image-sakura-oogami-36498135-500-707.jpg

Lookit this sweetie bara babe~

Although, in real life, I’m not a fan of the body-builder look on anyone. Those are just fluff muscles, and they are super unhealthy. : P

It works for Sakura though because she’s got the build for it, and her muscles are for fighting.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

…I like strong arms and soft bellies…

You know who I’m talking about.

Oh, well, you don’t? Let me show you then.

http://38.media.tumblr.com/6b09c134b295407b71431bce1ff2fb53/tumblr_ni16hkh2kQ1rvkqguo1_500.gifcomment image

Niiice.

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

Paradoxical Intention
Never seen the show but I bet she’s awesome I just wish society will see muscles as sexy especially on women and also people without muscles can still be seen as strong.

I definitely see what you and panda pool mean about what you like. They are very attractive.

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

Also don’t like associating strong/muscular to “manly” (unless the strong/muscular person is a man) which is mainly my point.

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

Fruitloopsie | September 11, 2015 at 12:06 am
Paradoxical Intention
Never seen the show but I bet she’s awesome I just wish society will see muscles as sexy especially on women and also people without muscles can still be seen as strong.

I definitely see what you and panda pool mean about what you like. They are very attractive.

She’s from a game called Dangan Ronpa. 😀

There’s an anime adaptation, but it’s not as good as the game itself is.

And don’t get attached to her. ; u ; Everyone you love dies in that game, and it’s sequels.

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

Paradoxical Intention
“And don’t get attached to her. ; u ; Everyone you love dies in that game, and it’s sequels.”

http://rack.1.mshcdn.com/media/ZgkyMDEzLzA3LzE4L2EwL2NyeWluZ3dhdGVyLjQ2NzZiLmdpZgpwCXRodW1iCTEyMDB4OTYwMD4/9fead436/c15/crying-waterfalls.gif
I think I should avoiding playing or watching it then I don’t like seeing people die 🙁

weirwoodtreehugger
5 years ago

I’m glad Gwendoline Christie, who plays Brienne on Game of Thrones is getting other work too. She’s in the new Star Wars and Hunger Games! She’s definitely a good real life example of a beautiful big and strong woman.
http://assets.elleuk.com/gallery/12661/1391164887-gwendoline-christie-games-ofthrones-season-3-premiere-2013-gty__large.jpg

Then there’s Serena Williams. Who are these advertising industry idiots who don’t think she can sell things?
http://media.philly.com/images/060214_Serena_Williams_600.jpg

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

Also don’t like associating strong/muscular to “manly” (unless the strong/muscular person is a man) which is mainly my point.

There’s no strong arm, soft belly women in DA that you can romance, though. They’re all hardbodied or weirdly waifish even if they swing two-handed weapons around. *pouts*

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

WWTH
I seen a commercial of her while I was waiting for a video on YouTube to load, Serena is very cool so is Gwendoline Christie; never seen game of thrones or hardly any Star Wars actually don’t know much about celebrities in general but I’ll take your word for it.

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

Panda pool
DA? You mean DeviantArt? “Waifish”? like in “Waifu”?
I used to play the video game Pokemon Gale of Darkness and it has a bodybuilder woman but I can’t find a full body picture of her and I’m not sure you be interested in her.

I never watched legend of korra but It appears she has some muscles and a soft belly
http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/p__/images/6/6a/Korra_vector_wip_2_by_fncombo-d58cgqx.png/revision/latest?cb=20140429130522&path-prefix=protagonist

Man I wish I can and have the patience to draw.

weirwoodtreehugger
5 years ago

If you don’t like watching people die, GoT is not for you!

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

WWTH
Yikes thanks for the warning.

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

Fruitloopsie | September 11, 2015 at 12:40 am
I think I should avoiding playing or watching it then I don’t like seeing people die 🙁

Yeah…the deaths are kind of the whole plot, actually. If you want, I can give you a quick synopsis of the game instead? Because it’s actually really good, despite the deaths, and the blood is a hot pink instead of red because apparently the Japanese audience (where the game was made) responded to that better than red blood?

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

DA? You mean DeviantArt? “Waifish”? like in “Waifu”?

Dragon Age and waifish: adjective, looking thin and frail, often with ragged clothing; homeless or neglected (minus everything after “ragged clothing”).

If you don’t like watching people die, GoT is not for you!

I still can’t get over Boromir’s death.

(And yes, what I did is intentional.)

weirwoodtreehugger
5 years ago

I’m too lazy to go find it on You Tube, because it’s about bedtime but there’s a pretty entertaining super cut of all Sean Bean’s deaths.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

@WWTH

Ehehehe, I think I’ve seen it. He has one of the most ridiculous type casts. Brad Pitt always eats something, Tom Cruise always run, Alan Rickman is always the bad guy, Sean Bean dies really well.

Fruitloopsie
Fruitloopsie
5 years ago

Paradoxical Intention
You don’t have to do that I can look it up but thanks that would be great. Don’t want to see the blood don’t care if it’s pink. Might as well make Saw rated PG becuase you replace blood or cover it with poked dots, logic.

Panda pool
Oh thanks.

katz
katz
5 years ago

Am I the only one who still imagines an Imogen Heap song suddenly breaking out whenever Sean Bean dies?

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

@katz

Hmm? Whatcha say?

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
5 years ago

Alan Rickman is always the bad guy

Trivia!

Rickman absolutely detests this characterisation of himself and is apparently very wound up whenever people mention it, because he feels it’s harmed his career. It’s his berserk button, sort of like talking to Patrick Stewart about Star Wars or asking Thom Yorke to play Creep.

Stephen Fry once related a story about how Rickman was approached by a child who said to him, “Mr Rickman, why do you always play baddies?” To which Rickman responded, and please read this in your very best Alan-Rickman-dripping-with-condescension voice:

I don’t play baddies. I play very interesting people.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

Villains are always the best roles, though.

Moggie
Moggie
5 years ago

The Metatron was not a bad guy!

TheLulwzWatch
TheLulwzWatch
5 years ago

The redpill movement has got to be the saddest rationalization for loserdom I’ve ever seen on the internets and that is saying something.

katz
katz
5 years ago

I’d say Alan Rickman’s roles are always the best roles, whether he’s a villain or not.

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

Fruitloopsie | September 11, 2015 at 3:22 am
Paradoxical Intention
You don’t have to do that I can look it up but thanks that would be great. Don’t want to see the blood don’t care if it’s pink. Might as well make Saw rated PG becuase you replace blood or cover it with poked dots, logic.

Well, here’s the cliffnotes version:

The story starts off in Dangan Ronpa with a very average protagonist, who was selected via a lottery to attend a very prestigious school called Hope’s Peak Academy.

Hope’s Peak is a school for kids who excel in their fields at whatever they do, and these kids are called “Super High School Level” (there’s also an elementary school too, but we don’t get to see anyone from there until the third game). Since Makoto (our protag) was selected via lottery to go, he’s “Super High School Level Luckster”, or “Super High School Level Luck”.

He goes to the school, passes out, and wakes up a while later, only to discover that his classmates are standing around what looks like a vault door. All the windows are bolted over with metal plates, there’s no way out.

You get introduced to the other characters, who have talents like fashion model, gangster, hall monitor, doujin writer, idol, computer hacker, heir, wrestler, detective, and swimmer.

Then you’re all called to the gym, where you meet a black and white bear who introduces themself as Monokuma. Monokuma tells you you are trapped in the school, and you must kill each other to get out.

After every murder, there is a period of investigation, then a class trial. In the trial, if you correctly figure out who the murderer is, they are executed for their crimes. If you guess wrong, everyone else is executed, and the murder gets to leave the school.

And that’s how it goes for the first game.

Moocow
Moocow
5 years ago

@fruitloopsie

Thanks! 🙂 Fortunately I have come a long way since then and I’m in a really good place now.

On the topic of sexy muscular women, how about FFXIII’s Fang?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gj-9VXevqBo/UzVmiYyeucI/AAAAAAAAAwI/RJqor4W0PB0/s1600/Ff13-fang.png

Despite never finishing that game, I reaaaaaaally liked Fang. She has a rugged and “tough” look about her that I find incredibly attractive. Her role in the game-play also reflected that.

EM
EM
5 years ago

I feel so bad for those red pill/wish I were a king guys. They are so delusional, with a fragile self esteem. It’s very sad.