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The Honey Badgers file their suit in moon court. And possibly in Alberta, too.

We Hunted the Mammoth Legal Advisor Sweetie P. Jonus, Esq.
We Hunted the Mammoth Legal Advisor Sweetie P. Jonus, Esq. is skeptical of the Honey Badgers’ legal strategy

You remember that lawsuit the GamerGate-loving, feminist-hating “Honey Badger Brigade” was apparently going to file against the Calgary Expo (for tossing them out) and The Mary Sue (for saying mean things about them, or something)? You know, the suit that they raised more than $30,000 to finance from their angry and apparently quite gullible fans? 

Well, apparently they’ve filed the suit?

I ended with a question mark because they’ve been a teensy bit vague about what exactly they’ve done. 

Rather than go with the traditional press release, you see, the Honey Damsels Badgers have decided to let the world (and their donors) know about this new development by obliquely referencing it on Twitter, nearly a week after the fact, and then pretty much refusing to answer any questions about it.

Like, for example, what exactly they filed, and where, and how exactly they think they can sue a website headquartered in the United States for allegedly getting them kicked out of an expo in Canada. Especially if they don’t actually file a separate lawsuit in the US.

Here’s how things went down on Twitter.

I asked a few followup questions, trying to nail down some details about the filing — if the disbarred lawyer they got to help them with “research” was involved in the filing, and whether they had filed a separate claim against The Mary Sue in the US because, you know, the Mary Sue is based in the US.

Well, so much for that, I guess.

I also sent a note to The Mary Sue to see if they had any statement or if they had even been notified that the HBB had filed anything. I haven’t heard back from them yet.

Given this dearth of information and the HBB’s apparent unwillingness to answer questions, my best guess is that they filed a Statement of Claim in Alberta based at least loosely on the “Legal Draft” posted on the HBB website back in July, prepared by the aforementioned disbarred lawyer, Harry Kopyto.

In that draft, the HBB’s declared that they were seeking

damages in the amount of $50,000 jointly and severally against the Defendants Alberta Comics and Entertainment Expo Inc. and The Mary Sue for injurious falsehood and also against the Defendant Alberta Comics and Entertainment Expo Inc. for breach of contract and against The Mary Sue for inducing breach of contract.

The Legal Draft describes The Mary Sue as “a daily internet newsletter which promotes itself as the premier destination for entertainment geeks.”

How do you do, fellow entertainment geeks. Could you kindly direct me to the nearest daily internet newsletter?

And it goes on to declare that

the false and disparaging comments published by The Mary Sue also dissuaded persons from engaging in and refusing to have any contact or purchasing merchandise from the Plaintiff.

Can I get in on that? No one bought anything from me that day either, and I’m pretty sure The Mary Sue was to blame. I’ll settle for $60,000 or maybe just a fruit smoothie.

If the HBB’s actual filing looks even vaguely similar to this draft, it will be interesting to see how one goes about suing an American entity in a Canadian court for allegedly saying things that allegedly stopped alleged persons from buying Honey Badger merchandise at a convention in Calgary.

I’m no disbarred lawyer, but somehow I just don’t see this working out for them.

Oh, and how do you “dissuade persons from engaging in?”

Engaging in what? 

 

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Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
9 years ago

@EJ

The code is actually pretty short but I’m getting tripped up in the places.

Here is the part that actually has the skeleton parts:

var oldValue = textNode.nodeValue;
var v = oldValue;

v = v.replace(/bsjw(s?)b/ig, “skeleton$1”);
v = v.replace(/bsocjusb/ig, “skeletonism”);
v = v.replace(/b(a)n (skeletons?)b/ig, “$1 $2”);
v = v.replace(/b(s)ocial justice (warriors?)/ig, “$1keleton $2”);

if (v !== oldValue) {
textNode.nodeValue = v;
}
}

I’ve tried switching things out but, like…I don’t code stuff like this. I just do HTML. I need to look up shit for Python and I’ve made one DOS game that didn’t work. That is my non-HTML experience.

CCD
CCD
9 years ago

This is so fucking precious. I wish I could get video of the judge’s eyeroll as they dismiss this suit, if this make-believe kiddie version of a lawsuit even makes it that far.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
9 years ago

@Pandapool:
Java isn’t my language but I’ll see what I can do. I am currently four minutes overdue to get out of bed and into the shower to begin my day, so I’ll ponder it on my commute.

If there are any real Java coders in the house, your expertise would of course be gratefully accepted and paid for with cat pictures.

I think what has you tripped up is the capitalisation code. It searches for initial capitalisation and tries to preserve it, so ‘Socjus’ becomes ‘Necromancy’ and ‘socjus’ becomes ‘necromancy’.

As regards which languages you do: In my experience coding is a mindset thing. If you have the right mindset then learning a new language is easy, in the same way that if someone is good with dogs then they can easily befriend any given dog.

guest
guest
9 years ago

🙂 ‘was’ is a verb.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
9 years ago

@EJ

You don’t have to mull over it. I’ll figure it out myself.

Paradoxical Intention
9 years ago

Thomas Hobbes | September 7, 2015 at 11:17 pm
The Honey Badgers are indeed, without a shadow of ambiguity, performing the work of the Lord, and clearly you are all acting in a very sexistic manner by insulting them. Indubitably, and consequentially, they strive vigorously to free the female of the human species from the autocracy of intersectionality, which calls women to bow down before the avaricious goddess of marriage equality and privilege economics.

“Sexistic” isn’t a word. I think you’re trying to reach for “sexist”, but your reach isn’t that long.

Though, I did have a laugh at the notion that women criticizing other women whose main goal in life is to be anti-feminist and spout GG propaganda while hiding behind their gender to avoid criticism is somehow sexist.

And the “autocracy of intersectionality”, really? I’m not sure you know the meanings of these words.

Intersectional feminism is about reaching out and dealing with other issues like racism, homophobia, transphobia, etc.

An autocracy is a system of government where one person holds all the power.

I don’t see how this is going to work out, unless Katie’s running for Matriarch again and no one told me.

Thomas Hobbes | September 7, 2015 at 11:19 pm
It is well known that Shakespeare’s character Katie from the Taming of the Shrew, and Ofelia from Hamlet, are forerunners of the badger spirit.

Willy Shakespeare’s rolling in his grave. Whether it’s from you gravely misunderstanding his work or butchering his language, we’ll never know.

The Hufflepuffs in Harry Potter, and Cedric Digory was assassinated; this has been used as a code of communication by the networks of those whom know the truth about civilizatory remobilization.

http://38.media.tumblr.com/bace0dba2231fab292cfea31f3bc26d5/tumblr_n1878x3SDL1tsnj79o2_500.gif

First off, “civilizatory” isn’t a word, but more importantly…

You come into this comment section, and insult my house? Motherfucker, take a goddamned seat. In fact, take a whole fucking row of seats. Classes are in session.

http://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/filepicker%2FKXWbxbYRT4ih8tgz6wCl_tumblr_m21bmcIU4r1qcmfnio1_500.gif

How dare you come in here and disrespect Helga Hufflepuff like that. She strove for acceptance and equality, she valued hard work and fair play, and she said she’d take any student, even if they weren’t the bravest, the most clever, or the most ambitious. In fact, because of that attitude, Hufflepuffs have been unfairly mis-characterized as being dull, not talented, and just a bunch of slackers, despite the fact that that’s the furthest thing from the truth.

In fact, let’s quote the sorting hat on this one:

You might belong in Hufflepuff,
Where they are just and loyal,
Those patient Hufflepuffs are true
And unafraid of toil;

For Hufflepuff, hard workers were
Most worthy of admission;

Said Hufflepuff, “I’ll teach the lot
And treat them just the same.

There we go. Three different versions of the song. Emphasis mine.

BUT WAIT, I have more!

From the Harry Potter Wiki:

Hufflepuff is the most inclusive among the four houses; valuing hard work, patience, loyalty, and fair play rather than a particular aptitude in its members.

Emphasis mine again.

Helga Hufflepuff was a beacon of social justice who vouched for equality for all her students regardless of their talents with magic, their best traits, what they wanted out of life, or the lineage of their blood, and the idea that you’d compare her and the house she founded on the principles of equality, hard work, justice and fair play to these women who are using their gender as a shield for their shitty behavior so they can continue to harass and taunt women they don’t like and aren’t part of their special MRA wannabe club is sickening.

[/Hufflepuff rage]

http://i.imgur.com/DlOyVRJ.gif

Paradoxical Intention
9 years ago

Fuck you italics mammoth, I was angry. >:[

Twisted Inspiration
9 years ago

“#GGers and other social conservatives; we saw it recently in another thread about offensive comedians not getting bookings, for example”

Hm, must re-read the thread again, seem to have missed that. But just in case you have any illusions here: I’m strictly anti-GG and liberal.

Zeb Berryman
Zeb Berryman
9 years ago

Thomas Hobbes: Thank you. For a while now the trolls have been rather boring, so its really great to see the return of your conspiracy theories. I particularly like your misspelling of Ophelia and calling Kate Katie. Truly a masterstroke.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
9 years ago

@Paradoxical

Your rebuttal was all I expected and more.

Thomas Hobbes
Thomas Hobbes
9 years ago

Cheers

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
9 years ago

@PI:

That was inspiring. I feel I need more mic drop gifs for rants like that. The honour of Hufflepuff has been upheld.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
9 years ago

@Twisted Inspiration:

I misread your meaning, then. My apologies.

(Since English is not your native language or mine, this is probably going to happen a lot between us.)

Thomas Hobbes
Thomas Hobbes
9 years ago

I shall indeed retire for the night, my brave and beautiful adversaries. May thou discover the joy of Augustinian liberty; BTW Teresa of Avila spoketh to me in a dream ahsd say she pray for you all and also prayeth for all the women to find God and think outside the postmodern thought balloons. Salutations and blessings for peace profound!

Robjec
Robjec
9 years ago

@paradoxical intentions
I think one of the biggest problems with gamer gate is they can’t see how in relavent and unwanted their views are. They think they represent all gamers not just the few that are really I’m their group.

I think this is why they blame sjws for everything. It let’s them continue on with the falsehood they have built for themselfs.

Also I’m hufflepuff too. I knew I liked you for a reason lol 🙂

katz
katz
9 years ago

You guys like this clown? I mean, if you’re having fun with him, knock yourself out, but I can’t stand the ones who are obviously just taking a piss.

Twisted Inspiration
9 years ago

@EJ: Accepted. Sorry if I wasn’t clear enough. I probably agree to 99% of the things here (well, the good things, not the horrible stuff quoted from other places). Ok, let’s be honest, agreeing with the fact that GG and MRM are really, really evil is easy, it’s like agreeing not to like the guy who kicks puppies for a living. I just sometimes have problems with details that rub me the wrong way. Most of the time it’s just me not having understood the full implications of some of my (wrong) beliefs, but still, the way to get around that (for me) is to question everything (including myself) and not unquestioningly falling into anyone’s party line. But of course, I realize that many of you (not me, fortunately, another privilege) here had bad experiences with trolls, etc. so it’s easy to misread a (probably badly worded) question as a veiled attempt to attack. I am sorry if this was the case, it wasn’t my intention to upset anyone.

takshak
takshak
9 years ago

“Augustinian liberty”

wasn’t Augustus the one that killed the Republic for good?

Kat
Kat
9 years ago

Media Relations 101
Professor Honey Badgers

Relax Manboobz.

Snottiness? Check.

Missing a comma? Check.

You’ll know the outcome almost as soon as we do.

Stonewalling? Check.

Don’t bother to rinse. Just repeat.

Thomas Hobbes
Thomas Hobbes
9 years ago

The saint, not the emperor, my notorious colleague. John Steinbeck in the Grapes of Wrath also writes about how feminism is an encomium on the social relations of the family. Now goodnight, forsooth.

Kat
Kat
9 years ago

The Honey Badgers file their suit in moon court.

I was all set to alert David to his unfortunate typo: “Moon court” should be “moot court.”

Then I decided to Google “moon court.”

Duh.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
9 years ago

Okay, Tom, don’t overstay your welcome or else you’ll get boring again. Just pop in every few days to spout your Illuminati shit and leave.

Thomas Hobbes
Thomas Hobbes
9 years ago

Ok. Good advice.

Paradoxical Intention
9 years ago

Pandapool — The Species that Endangers YOU | September 8, 2015 at 12:59 am
@Paradoxical

Your rebuttal was all I expected and more.

EJ (The Other One) | September 8, 2015 at 1:03 am
@PI:

That was inspiring. I feel I need more mic drop gifs for rants like that. The honour of Hufflepuff has been upheld.

I’m glad y’all enjoyed my Hufflepuff Brand Nerd Rage, though I do feel that this comes up every time these particular women are mentioned.

Robjec | September 8, 2015 at 1:20 am
@paradoxical intentions
I think one of the biggest problems with gamer gate is they can’t see how in relavent and unwanted their views are. They think they represent all gamers not just the few that are really I’m their group.

I think this is why they blame sjws for everything. It let’s them continue on with the falsehood they have built for themselfs.

Of course they think they represent “all gamers”, because they live in an echo chamber, and they try to disqualify anyone who disagrees with them as “not a real gamer” for whatever reason. : /

They can’t believe that someone who also identifies as a gamer would ever think they’re wrong, and it’s terrifying the lengths they will go to try and keep that narrative.

Also I’m hufflepuff too. I knew I liked you for a reason lol 🙂

http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20140114000112/ididntdoit/images/4/43/Aww_zps3509580d.gif

Aw, you’re my new favorite now.

(But, after Pandapool, because Pandapool is my favorite and she was in that position first.)

Moggie
Moggie
9 years ago

This thread has reminded me that I miss Madeline Kahn so much. Fuck cancer.