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The Honey Badgers file their suit in moon court. And possibly in Alberta, too.

We Hunted the Mammoth Legal Advisor Sweetie P. Jonus, Esq.
We Hunted the Mammoth Legal Advisor Sweetie P. Jonus, Esq. is skeptical of the Honey Badgers’ legal strategy

You remember that lawsuit the GamerGate-loving, feminist-hating “Honey Badger Brigade” was apparently going to file against the Calgary Expo (for tossing them out) and The Mary Sue (for saying mean things about them, or something)? You know, the suit that they raised more than $30,000 to finance from their angry and apparently quite gullible fans? 

Well, apparently they’ve filed the suit?

I ended with a question mark because they’ve been a teensy bit vague about what exactly they’ve done. 

Rather than go with the traditional press release, you see, the Honey Damsels Badgers have decided to let the world (and their donors) know about this new development by obliquely referencing it on Twitter, nearly a week after the fact, and then pretty much refusing to answer any questions about it.

Like, for example, what exactly they filed, and where, and how exactly they think they can sue a website headquartered in the United States for allegedly getting them kicked out of an expo in Canada. Especially if they don’t actually file a separate lawsuit in the US.

Here’s how things went down on Twitter.

I asked a few followup questions, trying to nail down some details about the filing — if the disbarred lawyer they got to help them with “research” was involved in the filing, and whether they had filed a separate claim against The Mary Sue in the US because, you know, the Mary Sue is based in the US.

Well, so much for that, I guess.

I also sent a note to The Mary Sue to see if they had any statement or if they had even been notified that the HBB had filed anything. I haven’t heard back from them yet.

Given this dearth of information and the HBB’s apparent unwillingness to answer questions, my best guess is that they filed a Statement of Claim in Alberta based at least loosely on the “Legal Draft” posted on the HBB website back in July, prepared by the aforementioned disbarred lawyer, Harry Kopyto.

In that draft, the HBB’s declared that they were seeking

damages in the amount of $50,000 jointly and severally against the Defendants Alberta Comics and Entertainment Expo Inc. and The Mary Sue for injurious falsehood and also against the Defendant Alberta Comics and Entertainment Expo Inc. for breach of contract and against The Mary Sue for inducing breach of contract.

The Legal Draft describes The Mary Sue as “a daily internet newsletter which promotes itself as the premier destination for entertainment geeks.”

How do you do, fellow entertainment geeks. Could you kindly direct me to the nearest daily internet newsletter?

And it goes on to declare that

the false and disparaging comments published by The Mary Sue also dissuaded persons from engaging in and refusing to have any contact or purchasing merchandise from the Plaintiff.

Can I get in on that? No one bought anything from me that day either, and I’m pretty sure The Mary Sue was to blame. I’ll settle for $60,000 or maybe just a fruit smoothie.

If the HBB’s actual filing looks even vaguely similar to this draft, it will be interesting to see how one goes about suing an American entity in a Canadian court for allegedly saying things that allegedly stopped alleged persons from buying Honey Badger merchandise at a convention in Calgary.

I’m no disbarred lawyer, but somehow I just don’t see this working out for them.

Oh, and how do you “dissuade persons from engaging in?”

Engaging in what? 

 

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Fang
Fang
5 years ago

My guess is this is like the whole request the governor of KY free Kim Davis – he can’t, but it’s publicity. Same here, they’ll file whatever this is, then when no one responds, threaten to up legal action or whatever, ask for more money . . . and so the cycle goes.

Yes, they’re a joke, but true believers will send in the cash.

Bibulb
Bibulb
5 years ago

I’m assuming that was “engaging in, and refusing to have, any contact, or purchasing merchandise from the Plaintiff.” (I probably comma-faulted to within an inch of my life in over-correcting, there.)

That said, their crap-ass proofing and editing is kind of indicative of the likely quality of any filings that they might have performed. “Let’s make our professional public-facing documentation as high-school as possible!”

Alan Robertshaw
Alan Robertshaw
5 years ago

It is possible to sue an American entity in a Canadian court.

Enforcing any judgment might be problematic though. Generally the US and Canada will enforce each others judgements but actions founded in defamation are a possible exception; because of the First Amendment and some specific legislation in some states.

weirwoodtreehugger
5 years ago

Nobody bought anything from me today. I’m going to sue the Honey Badgers. Why not?

Tara the Antisocial Social Worker
Tara the Antisocial Social Worker
5 years ago

“Breech” of contract?

According to our good friends at Wikipedia, a “breech” is:

Breeches, an item of clothing covering the body from the waist down
Breech, in a breech-loading weapon, a chamber integral to the rear portion of a gun barrel
Buttocks, the lower part of the human abdomen
Breech, the lower part of a pulley block
Breech, the penetration of a boiler where exhaust gases leave it

I’m trying to figure out which one they took out a contract on.

Judas Peckerwood
Judas Peckerwood
5 years ago

Fairly amusing, but they’re going to have to up their game if they hope to match the humorous train wreck that was “The Sarkeesian Effect.”

sn0rkmaiden
5 years ago

Meh, they just have to make a show of pursuing the claim, or the donors might start wanting their money back, along with any money they laid out to attend the conference that never was.

brooked
brooked
5 years ago

comment image

brooked
brooked
5 years ago

I love lawyer pet memes way way too much.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

comment image

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

Lawyer caaaats. Adorables. 😀

baroncognito
5 years ago

Well, because of your “No case too small” meme, I now have the Chip & Dale’s Rescue Rangers theme stuck in my head. I hope you’re happy.

If you need help just call Chip Chip Chip Chip and Dale’s Attournies at Law! Chip and Dale Avocados!

Paradoxical Intention
5 years ago

the false and disparaging comments published by The Mary Sue also dissuaded persons from engaging in and refusing to have any contact or purchasing merchandise from the Plaintiff.

Or, or, and I’m just spitballin’ here, it could be that the merchandise you had up on display for everyone to see was geared towards GamerGaters, which most people actively don’t agree with and despise for their awful ways?

So, when people saw you had GG merch up for sale, they went “Oh, they’re GGers.” and promptly turned heel and walked away.

The Honey Badgers have made no secret of their ties to GG, and when you broadcast that to people who are aware that GG is comprised of a lot of really nasty people, they’re not going to want anything to do with you.

Not to mention that even before GG, the HBs had a reputation for being anti-feminists, and they went and disrupted a panel at the convention.

Trust me, The Mary Sue had nothing to do with people not wanting to talk to you.

Hambeast, Social Justice Road Warrior
Hambeast, Social Justice Road Warrior
5 years ago

Nobody bought anything from me today. I’m going to sue the Honey Badgers. Why not?

Me too! Besides, I could really go for a mango smoothie…

zblongladder
5 years ago

@Tara — More importantly, which one they’re pulling their arguments out of.

Bina
Bina
5 years ago

KITTYSQUEEEEEEEE!

Ahem. What was I gonna say, again?

Oh yeah: Honey Damsels. I’m gonna be using that from now on. Ha, ha.

C.S.Strowbridge
C.S.Strowbridge
5 years ago

Do you think GamerGaters will ever catch on that they are being scammed?

Terrabeau
Terrabeau
5 years ago

Wait, didn’t the Badgers say they were going to do this like, two months ago? How freakin’ slow is the postal service in Canada? It’s almost like they don’t think they can actually win this and are just dragging the drama out for as long as possible to swindle even more money from- oh, wait, I just realised that’s exactly what they’re doing.

wordsp1nner
5 years ago
Sissy
Sissy
5 years ago

Aww, pet lawyers. Something tells me that this thread’s going to have a lot more of those.

@Paradoxical Intention:
Hey, hey, hey! You using that logic again?! You cut that logic using out! *joking finger wag*

@C.S.Strowbridge:

Do you think GamerGaters will ever catch on that they are being scammed?

It’s about ethics in… tossing money about to make sure that women are endlessly harassed? More money than sense, I guess. *shrugs*

Thomas Hobbes
Thomas Hobbes
5 years ago

The Honey Badgers are indeed, without a shadow of ambiguity, performing the work of the Lord, and clearly you are all acting in a very sexistic manner by insulting them. Indubitably, and consequentially, they strive vigorously to free the female of the human species from the autocracy of intersectionality, which calls women to bow down before the avaricious goddess of marriage equality and privilege economics.

Thomas Hobbes
Thomas Hobbes
5 years ago

It is well known that Shakespeare’s character Katie from the Taming of the Shrew, and Ofelia from Hamlet, are forerunners of the badger spirit. The Hufflepuffs in Harry Potter, and Cedric Digory was assassinated; this has been used as a code of communication by the networks of those whom know the truth about civilizatory remobilization.

weirwoodtreehugger
5 years ago

It is well known that Shakespeare’s character Katie from the Taming of the Shrew

All hail Katie!

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago
Reply to  Thomas Hobbes

I *like* this troll. He talks like some random person who stumbled into a ren faire and is trying to fit in. XD

I mean, I’ve heard people say women are being trapped by a lot of things, both correct and completely off-the-wall, but marriage equality?

Marriage equality?

Hey, Thomas—gay lady here. Go and shield your eyes from the possibility of an unholy union between us sinners. You’ll feel better, and we don’t have to deal with you… not that your Fauxe-Olde-Englishe isn’t amusing.

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

Wait. WAIT.

This is troll of the year, guys. He just claimed that the *Hufflepuffs* were a secret Honey Badger message.

Oh stars above, I think this is the greatest troll I have ever seen.

cupisnique
cupisnique
5 years ago

Makes me wonder who this troll is. . . like do they giggle to themselves every time they post their nonsensical pontificating thinking themselves oh so clever?

Diogenes
Diogenes
5 years ago

Assuming they actually filed in a US court, here’s my short vignette of the proceedings.
“12(b)(6) motion is granted. Now get the fuck out.”

fin

cupisnique
cupisnique
5 years ago

@andlexist he’s been around before, just takes random things and people and spouts of conspiracy theories that are entirely impossible

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago
Reply to  cupisnique

@cupisnique

Yeah, I know. But the way he does it! Perhaps he is secretly a Markov chain, languishing in some MRA’s computer until his creator leaves, at which point he attempts “communication” in the only way he knows! 😀

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

It is well known that Shakespeare’s character Katie from the Taming of the Shrew, and Ofelia from Hamlet, are forerunners of the badger spirit. The Hufflepuffs in Harry Potter, and Cedric Digory was assassinated; this has been used as a code of communication by the networks of those whom know the truth about civilizatory remobilization.

http://31.media.tumblr.com/4e09b9fd01297cf10419dfc9eeffa734/tumblr_ng92ij8Wpw1tnisgno1_500.gif

This is amazing. This is the single greatest statement you’ve ever wrote. You should just quit while you’re ahead before you get boring again.

Sissy
Sissy
5 years ago

*claps excitedly* It’s the faux-Shakesperian troll! Yippee! *shares popcorn with the Mammothers*

cupisnique
cupisnique
5 years ago

All those dragon age gifs make me want to finish Inquisition . . . too bad downloading the game would take a billion days here in ol’ Peru =(

Terrabeau
Terrabeau
5 years ago

@cupisnique Wait, they’re being serious?This is fun.

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

*noms popcorn*

@Pandapool

I knoooow. This… this troll just claimed that Shakespeare and J.K. Rowling were Honey Badgers.

I repeat my theory that TH is a sapient Markov chain. XD

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

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{colortbl;red255green255blue255;red34green34blue34;red255green255blue255;}
deftab720
pardpardeftab720qcpartightenfactor0

f0fs26 cf2 cb3 expnd0expndtw0kerning0
outl0strokewidth0 strokec2 }

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

…dear Google Images gods, *how* did I mess that up so badly? O_<

weirwoodtreehugger
5 years ago

I’m still delighted that he changed Kate from Taming of the Shrew into Katie. Because Katie is our feminist overlord and apparently she’s doing double duty as a Honey Badger? Or more likely, she infiltrated them. Go Katie!

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
5 years ago

All hail Katie!

WWTH, have you ever come across an indie RPG called Kobolds Ate My Baby? Every time we mention Katie it makes me think of it.

@PI:
“Nobody bought stuff from us so SJWs* must be to blame” is a common meme amongst #GGers and other social conservatives; we saw it recently in another thread about offensive comedians not getting bookings, for example. It’s a fascinating insight into just how little they actually care about their much-vaunted capitalism when it works against them.

– – –

*Jackie is now reading this as “…so necromancers are to blame.” Heee.

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

@WWTH (I found myself typing “Katie” here.)

Katie is obviously a shapeshifting dragon. *nods sagely*

andiexist
andiexist
5 years ago

@EJ (TOO)

Those darn necromancers! Making people not buy stuff with their necromancer powers!

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
5 years ago

@andiexist:
Maybe not sentient (although that’s a marvellous theory) but I think it could well be a Markov chain. The sentence “The Hufflepuffs in Harry Potter, and Cedric Digory was assassinated” does not contain a verb, which is quite a common issue with Markov-based random text generators set to create turgid, complex prose.

Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
Pandapool -- The Species that Endangers YOU (aka Banana Jackie Cake, for those who still want to call me "Banana", "Jackie" or whatever)
5 years ago

All those dragon age gifs make me want to finish Inquisition . . . too bad downloading the game would take a billion days here in ol’ Peru =(

The final DLC is coming out tomorrow in NA, just FYI. Everyone is excite.

@EJ

I’m still trying to figure out how to rewrite the skeleton plug in so it reads necromancers and stuff. Java, man, they coded it in Java.

EJ (The Other One)
EJ (The Other One)
5 years ago

@Jackie:
“Find/replace” is your friend. Which environment are you reading the code in?

(My best friend is a huge fan of Java and will not hear a word said against it. I’m more of a C man myself, but I concede that Java is the correct language for many things, especially browser plugins. Which language would you have done it in?)

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